AN:

I took a (VERY LONG!) break from the show and kind of writing in general and am now back to writing this piece. I hope it lives up to expectations!

xxx

"-now baby I'm sure," Penny sang loudly as she danced around her living room frenetically, arms flailing above her head. "And I just can't wait 'til the day when you knock on my door." She stopped dead at the sight of Sheldon standing silently in her doorway, arms crossed over his chest. "Hey, Sheldon." She beckoned him with one arm. "Come on, dance with me." She spun on the spot with a wide grin.

He watched her for a moment. "No, thank you."

"Sheldon," she whined as she trotted over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Now I'm walkin' on sunshine," she continued along with the song as she forced him to move with her.

"Whoa," he muttered flatly as he allowed her to manipulate his body further. Penny giggled as she drew her arms around his neck. His arms snaked around her waist. "Is there any particular reason you're dancing in your living room in the middle of the day with the door open?"

"I was cleaning," Penny started excitedly. Sheldon opened his mouth. "Shut up," she warned as she raised a finger toward him before taking a breath. "And I got a call and it was Natalie, you know that girl who never does her side work, the one who lives with that guy who refuses to come out and is quote unquote friends with that guys who's doing the internet spread for-"

"Penny," Sheldon cut in. "It would be beneficial to you to breathe."

She paused and took a deep breath. "I got the job," she finished with a grin. She dropped a smacking kiss on his lips.

His eyebrows rose. "You got the job?" She nodded as she pulled him down to kiss him again. "Congratulations," he said after they broke apart.

"Thank you," Penny answered with a grin before leaving his embrace to shut off her stereo. Sheldon shut the door behind himself.

"May I ask after the integrity of this company?" he asked.

Penny rolled her eyes. "It has plenty of integrity, Sheldon."

"You're certain?" he questioned as he clasped his hand behind his back. "Or are you just excited about the possibility of being paid in shoes?"

"Sheldon, they don't barter." She paused. "Although that would be awesome." His facial expression remained neutral and Penny looked at him intently for a moment in silence. "Sheldon?" He raised an eyebrow in anticipation. "Are you okay?"

He shrugged. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Obviously I don't know," Penny reasoned slowly as she crossed her arms over her chest. "That would be why I asked." She wasn't trying to be mean or confrontational, but she had determined some time ago that Sheldon was not unlike a small child. It was sometimes difficult to figure out the times to treat him with hugs and a juice box and the times to take away his television privileges. She folded her legs underneath herself as she sat on the couch. Silently patting the cushion next to her, she beckoned him over. Sheldon slowly settled himself next to her. Seconds ticked by as Penny waited for him to speak, but he was merely staring at his hands, spread over his knees. "Now you talk," she finally prompted.

"I am…" He took a deep breath. "I'm giving a lecture this afternoon, and it appears I have what is commonly referred to as a…case of the butterflies."

"Sweetie, that is completely normal," Penny answered with a quick pat on his leg. He nodded ever so slightly in her general direction. "So, this is exciting!" she added as an after thought. "I haven't ever really seen you speak." She thought for a moment. "I mean in front of people who actually want to hear what you have to say."

"Thank you," he replied with a sarcastic smirk.

"Is anyone allowed to attend?" she asked as she turned toward him more fully.

"Technically, yes." Sheldon frowned. "Although I think you would get little out of it."

Her frown matched his. "What is that supposed to mean?" she asked as she leaned away from him slightly.

He turned toward her with raised eyebrows and watched her for a moment. "I mean that you don't understand the fundaments of my work." He paused. "I don't think it would be worth your time to attend."

Penny narrowed her eyes at him and simply stared, letting the silence in the room settle over them. "Are you saying you think I'm dumb?" she asked finally.

Sheldon remained silent for several long moments, staring down at his hands folded in his lap. Finally, he opened his mouth to speak. "It would be ridiculous of me to pretend at this point in the conversation that you possess the I.Q. needed to grasp what I will be speaking about."

She felt something tighten in her stomach, continuing to glare at him. He was steadfastly looking straight ahead, toward the television, at the floor. Everywhere but at her. Slowly, Penny felt her anger fading away, being replaced almost imperceptibly with….sadness. The realization settled on her shoulders like a ton of bricks and she exhaled loudly, drawing his attention toward her finally. She licked her lips and swallowed before turning her eyes towards his. "You…that's a yes, right?" She shook her head slightly, but Sheldon's lips remained in an unmoving thin line. "Right, well…I-" She stood awkwardly up from her spot on the couch and crossed her arms over her chest. He glanced up at her, six different expressions playing on his face. Penny couldn't clearly read any of them and frowned, feeling the slight sting of tears in the corners of her eyes. "I guess I shouldn't really be surprised, should I?" she asked quietly before turning and exiting to her bedroom.

She sat on the bed in silence, listening to his movements, hoping for him to come after her. Four minutes go by before she hears Sheldon rise from the couch and exit the apartment.

It wasn't until he was gone that she allowed herself to actually cry.

xxx

"You're just two cool guys," Penny prompted toward the television screen, where Keanu Reeves was currently trying to get a bomb off of a bus. He echoed her words and Penny rolled her eyes before taking another bite of cookie dough from the tube she currently held in her hand.

There was a short knock on the door before it opened to reveal Raj, giving her a nervous expression. "Hi."

"What's up?" Penny mumbled to him with a full mouth. The astrophysicist's face fell further and he took a beat in silence before answering.

"It's 'Lost' night," he responded. "We're starting season four tonight." With that, he held up the box set he been holding behind his back. As a way to reconcile their collective grief at the end to the series, the two of them had decided to start re-watching old seasons. "Jack had just told Kate they had to go back." Raj paused. "He had a beard," he added quietly.

"Right," Penny remarked. "I remember." She reached up to readjust the baseball cap she was wearing before setting down her tube of cookie dough. "I just…guess I'm not really feeling very 'Lost' tonight, Raj."

"So you're watching 'Speed' instead?" he challenged. "How is 'Speed' better than 'Lost'?"

"It's better than season four," Penny shot back quickly. Raj frowned at her before moving farther into the apartment and resting against the arm of Penny's couch. "Sorry, I'm just….not in a good mood I guess."

"Is that because your boyfriend is a giant douche bag?" Raj asked easily with a roll of his eyes.

Penny's jaw tightened. "Did he tell you?" she asked miserably.

"Tell me what?" Raj countered with a smile.

"I'm surprised he even realized he did anything wrong at all," she grumbled as she moved over a cushion, leaving room for Raj to join her.

"Oh no, he didn't."

Penny blinked at him. "What?"

"He didn't realize he had done anything wrong," Raj reaffirmed. "He still doesn't, even after we explained it to him." He shrugged.

"But you guys get it, right?" she asked.

"Yeah," he agreed. "But we're not deranged."

She rubbed a hand tiredly over her face before taking a bite of cookie dough in her mouth. She chewed in silence for a moment before offering the tube to the genius next to her. "Does he really not get it?"

Raj finished chewing his mouthful thoughtfully. "No."

Penny chuckled at his bluntness. "No?"

"No," Raj repeated. "And the fact that you don't realize that yet is starting to become a problem."

"Hold on a second there," Penny said with a pointed finger. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Raj sighed and thought for a moment. "Penny, my IQ is one hundred and fifty-eight."

"Yes," she sighed. "I get it, you're smart. You're all smart." She waved her arms in the air.

"That is twenty-nine points below Sheldon's," Raj went on, completely ignoring her. "But he still treats me like I'm an idiot."

"I think you should punch him," Penny interjected flatly.

"I can't believe I'm actually wasting time and energy trying to help Sheldon's relationship for him," Raj commented to himself. Then more loudly, he faced Penny. "The point is, he doesn't think anyone can be on an intellectual level with him. He doesn't treat you any differently than he treats the rest of us."

"But don't you think he should?" she asked pointedly.

"Yes," he answered. "But I also think you should have known better than to start dating him." He paused. "I am disappointed in both of you, actually."

Penny elbowed him playfully. "You think I'm being too sensitive."

Raj nodded slowly. "It is Sheldon after all. Baby steps, Penny."

"Yeah," she answered before sighing. "I'm just ready for him to be a grown up now."

"We'll start looking for a 'Zoltar' this weekend," Raj answered with a straight face.

Penny hit him with a pillow.

xxx

A knock on the door a few hours later woke Penny from a light sleep. Throwing off the afghan that had been on top of her, she rose from the couch and ambled toward the door. Before the last repetition could finish, she yanked the door open, staring at Sheldon tiredly.

"Hello," he started, seemingly nervous.

"Hi," Penny answered in a flat tone before turning and going back into her apartment, leaving the door open for him to enter. After a moment, he did just that, shutting the door behind himself. He stood awkwardly, watching her as she folded the afghan and dropped it on the couch. "Are you here to apologize?" she finally asked.

Sheldon reared his head back and gave her a look that clearly said he thought she was crazy. "Why would I need to?"

Penny glared at him for a full thirty seconds before rolling her eyes. "What you said earlier was an…asshole thing to say, Sheldon."

Sheldon frowned. "I wasn't aware I said anything that wasn't true."

Penny sighed and balled her hands into fists to keep from reaching forward and wringing the physicist's neck. "Yes, but there is a difference between being truthful and being hurtful." She gave him a pointed expression.

"Penny," Sheldon started in his patented condescending tone. "It seems disingenuous to say anything other than this." He took a deep breath. "You are not as smart as I am." Penny frowned. "You are messy and you still can not sing, no matter how often you try." Her hands were on his sturdy chest, pressing him back towards the door before he'd even finished his sentence. "I haven't made my point yet," he continued and she dropped her hands from him.

"Whatever," she grumbled and crossed her arms over her chest.

"As I was saying," Sheldon went on with a slight hint of indignation and cleared his throat. "On the other hand, you…" His mouth quirked up on one side as he thought over how best to state his opinion. "You seem to understand many things I could never fathom, and together we…seem to work." Penny chewed her upper lip. "Penny, I refuse to lie to you and if," he paused and shifted his weight and swallowed. "If that is what you are looking for in a mate, someone who will never challenge you in any way, you need to find a pushover you can control." Penny stared at him evenly before lowering her eyes to the ground. "However," he added softly as he took the smallest of steps toward her, "I apologize for making you feel badly."

He was apologizing to her? It didn't seem to compute in Penny's brain correctly. Sheldon didn't apologize to anyone, even when he was clearly wrong. She wanted to move forward and squeeze him so tightly for even understanding. She swallowed hard and nodded slightly. "Thank you," she whispered.

Sheldon nodded curtly. "I am going to sleep at home this evening." Penny swallowed again. "I think it would be better." His voice trailed up at the end, as if he was questioning his own choice.

"Yeah," she agreed belatedly and stepped toward him slowly. He too moved forward, meeting her halfway. "I'll see you tomorrow?" Penny asked quietly. Sheldon nodded before leaning down and gingerly kissing her cheek.

He left the apartment silently without another look at her.

xxx

"Another round?" Penny squinted up at the fuzzy outline of the red-headed server who had been bringing them drinks all night. Penny nodded dazedly before turning her head back toward the conversation that was going on at their table.

"I am telling you, that is a dude!" Raj yelled over the loud bass thump that shook the entire building.

"Stop pointing!" Wolowitz answered, grabbing the astrophysicist's arm and pulling it down. Penny snorted loudly at the sight.

"You doing okay there, Penny?" She glanced up to the side and smiled glassily at Leonard before nodding. "You've been kind of quiet tonight."

"I'm great. I'm really great." She smiled again. "I'm just feeling kind of mellow."

"We need to get her another drink," Howard offered loudly as he leaned across the table toward Penny and Leonard.

"She's bringing another round," Penny answered. She bent over to drop her head onto Leonard's shoulder.

"She better hurry up," Raj announced. "You said we could go back out dancing."

"We can," Penny promised with a nod of her head as she sat back up. The red head returned with a tray full of drinks. Howard sneered at one of the glasses before passing it to the end of the table.

"Diet coke," he said in a mocking tone.

"Thank you," Sheldon answered in a brittle tone.

"I guess I'm just a little down because we have Captain Doom down there sucking all of the fun out of this party," Penny suggested at the top of her voice before all of their eyes landed on Sheldon. He glared at her.

"It's Doctor Doom," he yelled back before taking a long sip from his straw. Penny retaliated by downing her shot and standing abruptly. She slid against the edge of the table and felt Leonard's hand on her back steadying her before she shook him off.

"Let's go," she implored to Raj, taking his hand in hers and pulling him toward the dance floor, a good twenty feet away from their table. He allowed her to weave through the crowds of people, not letting go of her hand. Penny let the loud music settle into her, moving slowly to the beat of the song. Without thinking, she pulled Koothropali closer and threw her arms around his neck. She was determined to have fun tonight, despite the fact that he was trying to ruin it for her.

Nine days. It had been nine days since they'd spoken in any significant way. Beyond 'Pass the ketchup' on 'Halo' night or 'You used all of our milk again' on Wednesday morning, they had not even realized acknowledged each other. It seemed that they were in the middle of what chess players would call a stalemate.

God, she was even thinking like him now.

Raj's fingers rested uncertainly on her naked back for a moment before disappearing again and Penny felt a smirk tug at her lips. When she had stepped into 4A five hours earlier, she had felt four pairs of eyes bug out at the sight of her. She knew she looked pretty good. She had spent time getting ready, sliding into a pair of black leather pants and a matching black halter top. Her eyes were dramatic and smoky and her hair was in a high ponytail, teased as big as she could get it. Platform heels and hoop earrings completed the ensemble. She was going for a touch of Buffy with a light dusting of 1970s hooker. Penny could take a small amount of comfort in the fact that Sheldon had announced he would be joining them for the evening only after he had seen her.

After several songs, Penny pulled Raj back toward the table. Their fingers still entwined, they reached the table with a slight stumble just as Sheldon was rising. There was color to his cheeks and he was overly focusing on pushing his stool in.

He was mad.

"Where are you going?" she asked him irritably.

"Home," he answered flatly with a glower in her direction. The lights were getting brighter, edges coming into focus. "Where I should have stayed in the first place." He marched toward the door without another look at any of them.

"How is he going to get home?" Howard asked.

Penny stared after Sheldon's retreating figure for three seconds before her feet made the decision for her mind. She smiled apologetically to the three guys and moved quickly after the tall man. She caught up to him just outside the entrance. "Hey!" she yelled at him and Sheldon turned, clearly surprised that she had followed him. "What is your deal?" She crossed her arms over her chest, not trusting the flimsy material in the slight late night breeze.

"You," he pointed at her accusingly. Penny froze. "You get mad at me because I dare to point out that you aren't a physicist and then proceed to ignore me for nine days." He paused to take a deep breath. "That is twelve thousand nine-hundred and sixty minutes of being ignored," he added in a lower tone. People wandered past them, laughing and stumbling. "And now you have deemed it appropriate to move onto Raj."

He was stumbling back before Penny realized she'd shoved him hard. He paled as he shuffled backwards, wind milling his arms to keep from toppling over. His eyes narrowed at her after he'd found his footing. "Why did you even come tonight, Sheldon?" She was angry now, yelling at him as he retreated from her further until he was butted up against the brick wall of the building. "Was is just to complain and make everyone miserable?" She swallowed hard, willing the tears she was feeling to go away. "Or was it so you could see me acting like the slut you apparently think I am?"

"I don't think you're a slut," he answered instantly. "I think…I think you were trying to hurt me." He couldn't maintain any kind of eye contact.

"I wasn't sure you had feelings," she barreled on acerbically.

"Well then…" He sighed. "Then it's probably good that you broke up with me."

"We didn't break up," Penny yelled, jumping up and down in front of him. She placed one hand on each of his shoulders. "God, don't you think you would know if I had broken up with you?" He flinched at the tone of her voice, looking every inch of a wounded puppy. "No, you don't get to be the sad one here Sheldon." She sighed deeply. "I'm the one who…." She sagged against him slightly. "Why would you think I was moving on to Raj?" she asked miserably.

"You danced with him," Sheldon pointed out.

"He asked me," Penny countered quickly, following it with a shrug.

Sheldon only nodded in silence, still not looking her in the eye. "I…" He turned his head to watch the people coming and going from the club. "I came along because I miss you…and I wanted to be near you." This time it was he who shrugged. "I am unaware of what the proper conclusion to this discussion is."

"Syllables, Sheldon."

"What now?" he continued with a roll of his eyes. "Are we still in the middle of a relationship?"

"Yes," Penny answers with a small smile. "Even if it is a messed up and confusing one." She let out a maniacal shriek and dropped her head into her hands. A moment later, she felt his arms wrap around her unsurely and allowed her weight to settle completely against him.

"You really should have known I was going to be this much of a handful," Sheldon stated after a moment of silence.

Penny couldn't help the bubble of laughter that erupted from her.

xxx

"Gas is right, brake is left," Penny mumbled as she crawled into the passenger side of her car. Sheldon, who was adjusting the seatbelt strap against his chest, gave her a sidelong glare.

"Yes, thank you."

"Just trying to help," Penny offered as she closed her eyes. She heard him unbuckle before climbing over to her side of the car. She cracked one eye open to see his face inches from hers. "Hello there, sailor."

He rolled his eyes at her as he reached around her to grab her seatbelt and engage it. "Easy there," he intoned in a low voice before moving away again. He started the car and put it in reverse. Penny felt her eyes flutter shut again.

xxx

"Are you awake?"

"I'm trying not to be."

"I refuse to carry you up to your apartment. You better stay awake long enough to walk up the stairs unless you wish to sleep in your vehicle."

"It wouldn't be the first time."

"Charming."

"Do you want to sleep over?"

"In the capacity of nursemaid to you in your current state of drunkenness?"

"Syllables, Sheldon. I just…missed you."

xxx

She is woken again to the sensation of being lifted from the car. Sheldon is struggling to carry her. She chuckles throatily and follows him toward the building. "Are you always this much of a buzz kill?" Penny asked as she squinted against the harsh fluorescent light of the lobby.

"Did you just meet me?" he asked after a beat of silence. They climbed the stairs together, Sheldon's arm around her waist for support. They reached their landing and he moved forward to open her apartment door for her. She moved past him into her bedroom, kicking off her shoes in the process.

"Your bed is made," he noted in shock.

"Your conditioning is very effective," Penny mumbled as she climbed onto her mattress. "But for the record, sexual favors are a better reward than chocolate." She grinned up at where she thought he probably was, but could no longer keep her eyes open.

"You're going to fall asleep now," he said in a low tone.

Penny hummed for a moment. "Night."

"Goodnight, Penny."

She sighed and burrowed deeper into her pillow.

"I love you."

xxx