Whew! thank you all again so much for your patience! 3 There will be at least one more large chapter and an epilogue, or two shorter chapters and an epilogue (unless the story gets way far away from me) I am sorry to say though that Loki will not be making an appearance (although I have ideas for several more fics from this universe…). And now breakfast and bonding with the Avengers…(with canonical mentions of someone being hearing-impaired)
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Natasha and Bruce had already started breakfast by the time Peter got up.
"You haven't lived until you've had her stuffed French toast." Bruce informed him. Next to Bruce, Natasha was singing something in Russian and mixing something white in a bowl. When she was satisfied with the consistency she set the bowl down and retrieved a thick loaf of bread from a cabinet. Dancing a little as she went.
Peter assessed you would basically have to be some non-sentient thing to not appreciate Natasha. She was like some fem fatale from an old spy movie, beautiful and incredibly dangerous. She could probably kill you dozens of ways with only the things she had out on the counter, but here she was, content and smiling making breakfast in sweatpants no less. Still, he thought if there was a way to go death at the hands of the Black Widow would be something.
"Can you get the eggs when you're done Зайчик?"
"You ever going to tell me what that means?" She shook her head and went back to singing. Peter almost felt as though he was intruding on something, but the feeling didn't last long.
"Oh my God, did I actually get up before Captain Early Bird? Are you actually making that French toast? Am I still on Earth? Quick! Pepper! Go see if there is anything strange on the roof! No wait don't leave me with them!" Tony was unusually chipper. Pepper just laughed as he wrapped his arms around her waist and buried his face in her shoulder.
"Hate to break it to you Tony, but Cap is in the gym with Maria. He tried to help but Natasha shooed him out. Not sure why I'm so special."
"Because your culinary skills are a little more refined than his, and the strawberries take a delicate hand." The assassin gestured at him with the spoon.
"One of these days you are going to have to own up to the fact that you're everyone's favorite Brucie. Seriously." Tony was checking the news on one of his portable tablets.
"There is no way, I mean okay I did think about it for just one second, but..." Clint stopped mid sentence when they entered the room. He switched effortlessly to sign language to continue his conversation with Coulson.
(I did think about it for just one second but, he's like a kid brother, I couldn't if I tried.)
(Natasha?) Coulson tapped the letter "N" upright on his wrist where her Widow's Bite would sit.
(I never asked, and she's never brought it up.) Whatever he had said seemed to satisfy Coulson, he just gave Clint a look and bid everyone good morning. "Do you have an actual newspaper around here Tony or am I going to have to make do?"
"Make do? I am offended sir! Do you know what model this is?" He passed the thin screen to Coulson. "This thing is even Thor-proof now!"
"I have heard my name!" This morning he remembered to wear at least a t-shirt with his boxers this morning. "Son of Coul, it is good to have you in the tower with us this morning. You must stay more often, we are on better behavior when you are present."
"Only better?"
"There is really no help for some of us." He gestured to the floor where Clint had take up residence; the archer was attempting to keep all of Freya in his lap.
"You talkin' 'bout me lightning rod? Cause Freya is a good girl all the time, yesssheis."
"JARVIS can you let Maria and Steve know breakfast will be ready by the time they get up here?"
"Yes Ms. Romanov."
...
"Natasha I can smell it all the way from the elevator it's heavenly, you're one swell dame." Steve was still in his workout clothes; Natasha's French toast must really be worth it Peter thought.
Maria had been laughing at something Steve said, but she closed back up when she saw everyone in the kitchen.
"You're not on the clock Hill, you can relax a little. Nobody here is going to think less of you for smiling." Coulson's tone implied this was not the first time he had tried to get her to lighten up.
"He's right dear, really they're more afraid of you than you should be of them." Pepper added.
(Sounds like what we used to say to him.) Clint signed to Natasha.
"I can see you Clinton, I have found my new lease on life, thank you."
"Just don't follow too closely in his footsteps." Tony warned Maria. "We really don't want anyone else responsible for us getting skewered, or us being responsible for anyone else getting skewered; either way. Are we going to get fed sometime soon? I'm not a patent man you know and it smells so good in here it's like torture."
"Keep your pants on! I know it's hard for you, but now you get to wait until everyone else has theirs." Natasha was setting a plate of stuffed French toast down in front of Maria. At the last plate she purposely took the long way around the table to get to Tony.
"Ohgod, seriously this is like on the list of the top 5 best things I've ever put in my mouth." His comment caused Steve to choke a little.
"I wouldn't have phrased it that way, but he's right, this is delicious." Peter had never had breakfast this good before.
"Thank you." She raised a glass of milk to him in salute. They ate quietly for a little while until Clint decided to continue the conversation he and Coulson were having earlier.
(Coulson asked if we had gotten to Peter yet.) He signed fork in hand, pausing for a moment before deciding on a sign for Peter. He had to spell his name out afterwards to clarify with his partner.
(Isn't he underage? And don't talk with your mouth full.) Natasha scolded.
(I said I wouldn't anyway, but I didn't know about you.)
(He's cute, very flexible, I'm sure there is all kinds of fun to be had, but I'm sure he has a girl.)
"Okay, I only understood about every third word you just said, but I hope you're not talking about doing what I think you're talking about doing." Pepper was glaring at them.
"We were, but we're not." Natasha was as vague as possible.
"Okay good, 'cause that would be pushing it even for the two of you." Pepper looked to Coulson for confirmation. He nodded.
"I didn't know you could sign?" Peter was slightly uneasy with the conversation having seen a familiar motion in the conversation.
"I may have perfect vision, but I can't hear for shit. I read a lotta lips, or I sometimes suck it up and put the aids in." Clint shrugged.
"You really should let Bruce and me make you a better pair. I promise we won't have any other life altering accidents in the process."
Clint shrugged again. Tony looked from him to Natasha, who gently waved him off then leaned in to press a kiss to Clint's cheek. Peter felt bad for bringing up a sore subject. Clint must have noticed the look on his face.
"It's okay kid, I'm just stubborn. After breakfast I'll teach you the signs for everyone so at least you can know who we're talking about."
After clean up the team went their separate ways. Thor talked Maria to taking a walk with him and Freya; Natasha disappeared for a nap (they found her later on a couch in the living room). Bruce retreated to the lab and Pepper to her office. Tony made a big show of "sneaking off to do eccentric billionaire things." Clint and Peter took up residence in the living room on the other couch.
"We'll start with your name..."
...
Signing lesson turned into more Call of Duty, which then became Super Smash Brothers when Steve asked if he could play.
"Coulson, come on, room for one more. If I can do it you can do it!" Steve waved another controller.
"Steve, you button mash that doesn't count!" Peter ribbed him.
"It gets the job done."
This is how Peter came to find himself playing video games with Hawkeye, Captain America and Agent Phil Coulson of S.H.I.E.L.D. Once he got the hang of it Coulson gave Clint and Peter a run for their money, Steve was happy just to try and keep up.
By lunchtime Maria was back and the pair of agents had to leave. There was another round of hugging, and promises to return soon, and promises for their own guest rooms so they could return more often.
"Ride down with me Peter." Coulson put an arm around his shoulder and lead him into the elevator with him and Maria.
"Clint has really taken to you." He said when the door closed. "He and his own brother, well, that relationship didn't go well. It's nice for him to have sort of a surrogate. So thank you, because happy Clint means happy Natasha too. I don't play favorites, but they were my team before the Avengers were my team. Just watch out if they start talking about picnics." He punctuated his cryptic comment with a pat on the back before the agents exited the elevator.
Зайчик (ZAY-cheek) is, from what I found, an affectionate diminutive form of bunny or rabbit...Also my friend and I have indeed come up with unofficial signs for each of the Avengers and Peter! (I wish there was some way I could show you guys)
