It had been a long, hard day for Brenda. As usual, she was late arriving home, having stayed as long as she could working on the case. It wasn't even a matter of avoiding Fritz that she'd stayed, they'd come up with a lead and had stayed to work it. They all had. Tired, they'd finally called it a night and Brenda had gone home. And straight into another confrontation with Fritz.
The apartment was in darkness when she opened the door, the only light coming from the bedroom. She turned the lights on in the living room, putting her purse and coat down on the couch, setting dinner on the table and then going in the direction of the only light in the house. She entered the bedroom finding Fritz sitting on the bed, waiting for her.
"What are you sitting in here for? I've brought supper home." Brenda said.
"Well, Brenda, I wasn't even sure if you'd be coming home. You didn't bother to say goodbye this morning. In a hurry to get to work?" Fritz had the tone in his voice that indicated that tonight wasn't going to be any better than last night.
"Of course I was coming home. I'm only late because we were working on this case. Besides, I want to apologize for last night. I know you don't like talking about Will. I shouldn't have brought it up." Once again, Brenda was apologizing for something.
"Brenda, I've noticed a change in you the last month or so. We really need to talk." Fritz looked at the woman he loved, hurt in his eyes.
"Well, of course, Fritzy. But I haven't changed. I don't think I've changed." Brenda looked confused.
"Are you having an affair with someone? You won't talk to me anymore. When we do talk, we argue. You get defensive about Pope. You won't take the job that you should take. What is wrong with this picture?" Fritz spewed stuff out, like he was trying to get everything off his chest at one time.
Brenda was caught offguard by the accusation. She wasn't having an affair, but maybe what her and Andy were doing could be misconstrued as such. They'd become close since his attack, but she'd never crossed the line with him. This was hitting close to home.
"Why would you think I'm having an affair? I've never cheated on you, Fritz. Why would you ask that?" Brenda questioned.
"Because, you're always finding excuses to go to work early, or stay at work late. You get defensive when I say anything about Pope. You're helping him keep his job, at least so far. Are you having an affair with him?" Fritz couldn't help himself.
Brenda almost burst out laughing. He thought she was having an affair with Will? After all these years, he was still certain that something was going to happen between the two of them. No matter how many times she'd told Fritz it would never happen, he was still looking for something to have happened between the two of them. It frustrated her, but she knew she had to tread carefully on this subject.
"I'm not having an affair with Will. I'm not having an affair with anyone!" Brenda said emphatically.
"Then what's wrong? Us finally talking about my problem was suppose to bring us closer together. Instead, we're drifting apart. Why?" Fritz pressed on.
"I don't know what's wrong! I don't feel like I can talk to you about anything anymore. Especially Will. I don't want him to be fired. I want him to stay at his job. I like the way things are. Why do things have to change? And it's not because I still love him, or am having an affair with him. He's my friend. That's all. And this job means the world to him. But every time I try and talk to you about it, you're the one who gets defensive. Thinks there is more to us than what there has been in years." Brenda fumed.
"Then why do you go to work early? Stay so late? You don't have cases keeping you there all the time." Fritz spat back.
"Because it's easier to sit in my office and think than it is to be at home facing you!" Brenda let out.
It was like a slap in the face to Fritz. She was using work to avoid him, to avoid being alone with him. The woman he loved didn't want to be around him. He got up from the bed to come and face her.
"I'm that bad to live with? I love you, Brenda. I've gone out on a limb for you so many times. But you don't want to be in the same room with me sometimes?" His voice was low.
"It's not that, Fritz. I just feel like we've been fighting all the time. Or nitpicking, or just generally being miserable. And I avoid it. I'm good at avoiding things that are unpleasant. And lately, we've been really unpleasant to one another." Brenda sighed.
"So what do we do? What do you want, Brenda? We can't go on like this and survive as a couple. We need to communicate. And we haven't been." Fritz ran his fingers through his hair.
"I don't know, Fritz. I've been feeling that lately. I don't know what to do." Brenda sat down on the edge of the bed, head in hands.
Fritz sat down beside her, taking her hand. She looked at him, seeing the man she loved, but also all the problems they were facing. She really didn't know what to do.
"Maybe we should get some counselling. Talk all this through, get some insight into our relationship. We're drifting apart, especially if you think you can't tell me things." Fritz was trying to be understanding, but he was upset and hurt.
"If you think it would help. Maybe if we were apart for awhile, it might help. Right now, all we're doing is being angry at one another. I want to work on this, on us, Fritz. I do love you. I don't know what's the matter with me." She rested her head on his shoulder.
"You want a trial separation? You think that's the solution?" Fritz was getting upset again.
"Well, us avoiding one another and fighting all the time certainly isn't! Maybe we just need time to realize what we mean to one another. That's being forgotten in all of this." Brenda argued.
"Whatever you want, Brenda. It's always whatever you want." Fritz got up, pacing the room.
"It's not always whatever I want! I've tried changing for you, Fritz, I really have. It's taken a lot out of me, but I really have tried."
"If you were really trying, I wouldn't still believe you're having an affair with Pope. There's something not right in your dependence on him staying as Assistant Chief. Delk doesn't want him there. And you not taking the position isn't helping you keep Major Crimes around. You'll be lucky if he doesn't disband it just because you haven't taken the position." Fritz argued.
"You really think Delk would do that? Oh, right, I forgot, he's your new "buddy". You talk about a lot of things behind my back." Brenda was in a fighting mood again. "You haven't said anything about your affair suspicions to him, have you? Because if you have, that's just dirty, Fritz."
"Just because I'm friends with Delk doesn't mean I tell him everything. I'm not dirty, Brenda." He fumed back.
"Listen, I don't want to spend another night arguing, Fritz. I didn't sleep much last night, I'm tired, I'm worn out. And at this rate, we're going to say a lot of things we both regret. I think I'm just going to go stay in a hotel for the night and we'll talk when we're both more rational." Brenda went to leave the bedroom.
"That's your solution, to just walk away?" Fritz followed her.
"I told you, at the rate we're going, we'll both say things we'll regret. It's best if one of us just takes a time out. I'm willing to do that." Brenda said. She turned and went back to the bedroom, grabbing a bag out of the closet. She threw some items in it, trying to figure out what she'd need for a couple of days.
"So we're doing things your way again. That's just terrific, Brenda." Fritz said as he followed her.
"Give it a couple of days, Fritz. Maybe we just need a little time away from each other, to put things in perspective. To get our heads straight." Brenda couldn't believe she was doing this. She hated change more than anyone, and here she was, making a change that may be irreversible.
"Fine, Brenda, fine. Do things your way. I hope you're happy with the outcome." Fritz turned and left the room, leaving Brenda to finish throwing a few more things in her overnight bag.
She finished up, giving a last look around the bedroom. So many happy times in here, and yet, she was leaving it. She didn't know what was wrong with her. She just knew she couldn't take the sniping and the fighting anymore. She walked back out, looking at Fritz standing in the living room.
"It's not forever, you know. I'm sure we'll work through this. Let me know about the counselling, and I'll be there. I will, Fritz."
"You keep thinking that, Brenda. I'll believe it when I see it." Fritz turned from her, angry.
Brenda came up behind him and gave him a hug. "I will, Fritz. I'm not ready to give up on us."
"Then why does it feel like you are?"
"I don't know, Fritz. I don't know." She stood back, releasing him, heading for the door.
"Call me tomorrow. I'll see you later." Brenda opened the door and walked out. Not believing all that had happened in the space of what could only have been a few minutes, she got in her car and sat for a minute. Now she really did need to talk to someone about what had just happened. She pulled her phone out of her purse and dialled a familiar number. She was relieved when Andy picked up.
"Andy, are you home? I really need someone to talk to. Could I come over?" She didn't know why she automatically called him. It was like Fritz said, she hadn't been talking to him about things, it was someone else she'd been turning to. He just hadn't guessed the right man.
"Anytime, Chief. I'm just getting ready to have supper. I can wait, if you'd like to eat with me." he offered.
"I'll be there in a few minutes. I don't have much of an appetite. I just really need a friend right now. And they are in short supply." Brenda sighed.
"Anytime you need to talk, I'm here, Chief. I'll set out an extra plate, just in case." Andy wondered what had happened in the short time since he'd last seen her.
"And Andy?" Brenda said.
"What, Chief?"
"You can call me Brenda." With that, she hung up the phone and started the car.
