If you've been awaiting this, thank you for your patience! Please be kind! Chapter (is it?) 8 will be up reasonably soon.
For the second time in two days, Remus Lupin woke up with a headache. He rolled over onto his back.
'Fuck!'
Sirius sleepily opened one eye.
'Morning sunshine,' he said lazily.
Deciding now was not the time to question, Remus concentrated on fighting the tide of nausea that swept over him. Sirius's eyes opened wide and he chuckled before hopping out of bed and going off into the kitchen for water.
'There you are,' he said unnecessarily, placing the glass on the bedside table. 'Where's your paracetamol?'
'Don't have any,' Remus said, and moaned. 'I'm an idiot. I thought I never got hangovers.'
'You're getting old,' Sirius teased him gently, before quickly wriggling into his smoky clothes. 'Where are your keys? Oh – I had them,' he retrieved them from the lounge. 'Be right back.'
True to his word, fifteen minutes later Remus dimly heard him letting himself in.
'Painkillers, super strength, and antacid. Here you are, lad,' he said, handing Remus a few white tablets.
Remus sat up enough to swallow them with a few sips of water, then lay back down and dragged his pillow over his head. 'Owww…'
He slipped back into sleep.
When he woke up half an hour later, he felt miraculously better. 'Muggle medicine's better than I thought,' he said to himself, and struggled to sit up. His head swam slightly but he didn't feel like his stomach was about to expel its contents. 'Where's Sirius?'
He heard a little noise in the kitchen and padded through.
'Ah, tiny patient is still alive!' Sirius said gleefully. 'Feeling better?'
'Much, thank you. I am so sorry…'
'That can wait. Go and have a shower – you'll feel loads better. And then breakfast,' and Remus noticed for the first time the pan sizzling on the hob, and realised how hungry he was. He smiled gratefully at Sirius, who smiled back. 'Go on now!'
And so he went. The hot water revived him astoundingly, and when he re-emerged, shaking back his tangled wet hair, the table was laid and Sirius was just about to start dishing up.
'Coffee?'
'Oh, yes please.'
They ate in silence. When they were finally sated, Remus sat back in his chair and ran his fingers through his hair.
'Thank you so much, Sirius.'
'It was really my fault in the first place; making you come out somewhere you didn't really want to go. So it's only right that I should be the one to sort you out the next day.'
'That's not true at all. It's all my -'
'We can spend hours arguing over this, or we can go out for a nice bracing walk in the peaks and then pub lunch, and talk about interesting and exciting things instead.'
'Well – okay. That sounds lovely.'
'So we're settled. Now, if you'd care to finish your coffee, I shall wash up – nope, no arguing, remember? – and then I just need to pop home and get some more, er, suitable clothing on.'
Remus looked at Sirius, clad in his dancing best, and acquiesced with a laugh.
They walked together to Broad Lane Court, and Sirius swiped them in.
'Aren't you excited?' he demanded. 'You get to see real student digs!'
Suddenly, Remus looked worried. 'It's a bit off, isn't it, if I get seen by one of my students in here?'
'Ah, you're safe, nobody will be up at this hour.'
Remus glanced at his watch. 9.37. 'What time did we come home last night, then?'
'It was early,' chuckled Sirius. 'About, oh, half 11?'
'Oh my goodness,' Remus said, and flushed, but Sirius looked warningly at him and he didn't say another word.
Sirius opened the door of his flat with a flourish. 'My room's down the hall,' he whispered. And Remus followed him down the dark hallway and into his room. 'Bit small, but hey, it's only for a year,' Sirius commented.
The room was pretty messy, as Remus remembered Sirius's corner of the dormitory had always been. Books were strewn all over his unmade bed and a tangled heap of clothes lay in the corner.
'Sirius Black, perpetual adolescent,' Remus commented wryly, and Sirius pulled a face as he grabbed some clothes.
'Make yourself at home. I'll be two secs.'
'Don't you want a shower?'
'Had one at yours while you were slumbering… be right back.'
Remus sat on the corner of the bed and picked up a book. He had a shock of recognition when he discovered that this was in fact a book he himself had written, on his love, George Eliot. He flicked through it. It was dog-eared, and heavily annotated. Pausing to read a couple of comments, he saw they were mostly academic, but a few here and there were things like, "Very Remus-ish," and "So he hasn't forgotten!!"
He blushed, but he didn't know why.
When Sirius came back in the room, Remus held up his book wordlessly.
To his surprise, Sirius seemed slightly discomfited.
'Not recommended reading for first-year undergrads?' Remus said. 'Still, glad to see you're getting the right opinions!'
Sirius laughed along, slightly uncomfortably, Remus noticed. He dropped the subject, and Sirius pulled on his hiking boots in silence.
'What sort of walk are you intending to take us on?' Remus asked apprehensively.
'Oh, a good old ramble!' Sirius said, looking up from doing his laces with slightly flushed cheeks.
'But you promise we can stop at a pub after?!'
'Honestly Remus Lupin, will you never learn from your mistakes?' Sirius mocked.
'I might be better but I'm still a bit fragile!'
'Oh, a good walk will clear your head no end… okay, shall we go?'
They walked out into the morning sun.
'Let's take my car.'
'You have a car?' Remus asked, slightly surprised.
'Yeah – all the gold in the family vault is mine. My dear old mum popped off about four years ago so I'm absolutely rolling in it. Figured I might as well have a car. I plan on making lots of trips…'
'To where?'
'Oh, just around Blighty. I realised while I was away that I had seen so much of the world but so little of where I was actually born.'
Remus nodded.
'And here she is!'
'Bit more sedate than that old motorbike you used to have…'
'You haven't seen my driving yet, you know. Don't speak too soon.'
They climbed into the battered old Ford Escort and were trundling out of Sheffield and up and down the beautiful rolling hills, still partially swathed in tattered shreds of morning mist.
'Beautiful,' Sirius said softly, gazing round.
'Yes, isn't – oh! Sirius!'
Sirius swerved madly to avoid an oncoming car as it sped by, beeping furiously. Remus was laughing hysterically.
'You know – I thought – I thought you were joking – about your driving,' he choked between peals of laughter.
Sirius glanced sideways at him, adrenaline still coursing through him at their near miss but happy to hear his best friend laugh properly. Even if it took other near car crashes, he vowed he would hear it more often. Remus had always been slightly withdrawn at school but he didn't remember this sad-eyed man and he didn't like that he had probably caused some of the misery.
They pulled into a little stony car park empty of other cars amongst the desolate hills and just sat for a second, appreciating the lovely view.
Sirius, characteristically, broke the mood.
'Let's go!' he said eagerly, and Remus nodded.
They followed a little path down into the valley, mostly in silence. When they reached the riverbank, they by mutual agreement sat on the damp grass.
'I have something for you,' Sirius said. He seemed serious, and Remus looked at him penetratingly. 'Close your eyes and put out your hands.'
Remus obeyed, as he always did. He felt Sirius's warm breath and shivered in nervous anticipation, but his amber eyes flew open and danced with amusement as he felt the foil wrapping of a chocolate bar touch his palm.
'Thank you!' he exclaimed, and laughed, but opened it eagerly and they ate companionably.
'Is the river water drinkable, do you know?' Sirius asked when it had all disappeared almost as fast as it had arrived.
'Yes, it comes from a spring not too far up the valley,' Remus answered knowledgably. Sirius grinned at him.
'I knew you'd know,' he said triumphantly. 'But come on. I'm not drinking it alone… I refuse to be the only one to suffer if you're wrong.'
'Was I ever wrong at school?' Remus teased him. 'Who was the prefect, eh?'
Sirius shook his head, and leaped to his feet. 'C'mon,' he said, and dragged Remus up and over to the water.
'Looks pretty clear,' he said dubiously.
'Ah Sirius, where's your daring gone?' Remus asked him jokingly.
Their eyes met like eyes do.
'I'm sorry,' Remus muttered. 'That was tactless. Sorry.'
'I thought we agreed, no apologising today,' Sirius told him. 'And besides, I like it. It seems I'm not 'the reckless one' anymore!'
'It would seem like it,' Remus concurred. And on that note, they knelt by the river and scooped up handfuls of the icy water until, sated, they sat back and then lay down, staring at the sky.
'Have you got a long walk planned?' Remus asked. 'Should we get going?'
'No – no,' Sirius said lazily. 'This was as far as I got when I looked at the map on your wall.'
Remus laughed.
'Should I navigate us further, or should we go back up the hill and then find a pub?'
'Er…'
'Pub it is.'
'Can we stay here just a little bit longer?'
'Of course – of course,' Remus murmured. He closed his eyes and felt the watery autumn sun beating on his eyelids, seeing a haze of red. He thought languidly about all the tiny capillaries wending their intricate way through his skin, and was just drifting off to sleep when he felt Sirius shiver beside him.
'Cold?'
'I didn't want to disturb you – you looked peaceful…'
'I wasn't asleep – well, nearly. But come on. We should get moving before you get hypothermia!'
He stood up and tucked his still-damp hair behind his ears before offering a hand to Sirius. Then they began the long slow ascent back to the car.
'So do you come here, when you come out to the peaks?' Sirius asked slightly breathlessly.
'Sometimes – but I like to rent a car if I'm feeling a bit rich and, very early, drive out further, far from any villages or main roads,' said Remus. 'I bring a blanket and food, and a book or notepad or something, and just walk out as far as I can, find somewhere new and beautiful and just, I don't know, write or read. Sounds a bit boring and altogether weird, hey?' he finished self-consciously.
'No,' Sirius said seriously, 'it doesn't. It sounds lovely – and very like you.'
'Are you calling me lovely?' Remus teased him gently.
'I might be,' he replied with a fleeting grin.
'So, do you know any good pubs around here?' Sirius asked once they were back inside his car.
'You're talking to 'alcoholic lecturer of the year',' Remus said self-consciously. 'Of course I know. You want to carry on up this lane – I'll tell you when to turn off.'
A little further down the road he indicated a tiny winding road, and Sirius swung the car in. Soon enough they arrived in front of a sprawling old building, with a sign swaying in the breeze.
'"The King's Arms",' read Sirius. 'Not much imagination, pub owners.'
Remus chuckled. Once more they climbed out of the car, and walked into the dark pub. It was deserted. The barman looked up in surprise from the pump he was cleaning, and grinned.
'Customers!' he announced happily. 'What can I get you?'
'Oh – tomato juice please,' Remus said, his stomach turning at the thought of alcohol.
'I'll have a Coke,' Sirius said.
They paid, and left the barman to his boring task before finding a small and secluded table beside an empty fireplace.
'So have you come here a lot?' Sirius asked Remus, who was sipping his juice.
'A fair amount – I sometimes come here with Jane… it's the only place for miles around.'
'I like it,' Sirius said decidedly.
'Well, that's lucky,' Remus replied. 'Otherwise it's a long way to go for some food - and I'm starving.'
'Why didn't you say? We could have come here earlier…'
'I was the one who was almost asleep, remember? Anyway, your chocolate kept me going.'
They exchanged a smile.
'So what do you fancy?'
'Oh – something huge and very possibly unhealthy.'
'I hear a fry-up is the supreme hangover cure.'
'Well then, I'll go for that – is there a -'
'Here's the vegetarian one,' Sirius indicated on the menu.
'Oh. Thank you.'
'You're most welcome. As a matter of fact, I think I'll join you. I'll go and order.'
'How much is it?'
'Oh, it's on me. And don't forget. You're not allowed to argue with me!'
'But -' Sirius shot him a warning look. 'Thank you. Thank you very much.'
He sat and waited for Sirius to return, which he did swiftly.
'Well. Remus.' Sirius said when he had sat back down.
'Well Remus what?'
'Oh, I don't know. Just filling the silence.'
'…'
'Actually, yes, I wanted to thank you for looking after me so far. It's made my transition into student life much easier, knowing you're around.'
'Oh, Sirius, I haven't done anything at all!' Remus said, embarrassed.
Sirius just laughed. 'You're the king of self-deprecation, you know that?' he asked rhetorically, and Remus just blushed and looked into his juice. 'You don't even realise you're doing it! Just accept the fact that since I've come here, seeing you has been the only thing that I've really looked forward to. I mean, the people I've met are nice, lectures are interesting – but still… in fact, seeing you has been what I've been looking forward to most for quite some time now…' he trailed off, suddenly looking quite disconcerted.
'Thank you,' Remus said for the umpteenth time, very touched. 'I – well – since you came here, my life's been a lot more interesting – and enjoyable. So thank you again.'
'You thank me far too much,' Sirius laughed. 'I get just as much out of seeing you as you do more – probably far more. So there. Thank you!'
Remus smiled ruefully and ceded gracefully to his friend's gratitude.
'So what shall we do for the rest of the day?' he asked after a little pause.
'I suggest staying here for a few hours, and then going back to Sheffield and then – don't know – I'm sure you've got things to do -'
'No,' Remus said definitely. 'Why don't we – oh, let's go ice skating! I've always wondered whether you'd be any good, I mean, after seeing Padfoot on the lake when it froze over…'
'Oh yes! Yeah, I wasn't too keen on that, myself, but skating will be fun! Are you sure you're not busy…?'
'Positive. You've only really interrupted a truly dedicated aim to watch all the films ever made and read all the books ever written, you know. I'm not too ambitious; maybe one day I'll do a PhD but to be honest, I've just been floating on for the last few years. It's almost like I was waiting for you to come back and kick me up the arse.'
'And I've obliged?'
'More than obliged… my optician will thank you.'
Sirius grinned fleetingly, then they drank in silence for some minutes before their food arrived. They stayed in the pub a couple more hours, chatting away on things which somehow seemed a lot more inconsequential than a few weeks previously: Remus's career and his academic writing, his personal writing; Sirius's travelling, his family.
Two drinks and three cigarettes later, they finally touched on the subject they had been dancing around since Remus had brought up Padfoot.
'Do you think much about – before?' Sirius asked curiously.
'I tried not to for a very long time,' Remus said frankly. 'I was all alone, I knew I couldn't dwell on things. But since my life became a bit more secure, a bit more routine, when I got the lecturing job, I couldn't force it down any more. I couldn't stop thinking about it, about James and Lily dying, about little Harry, and about Peter. It was driving me mad. So I started writing… what about you? Do you think about it all?'
'Pretty hard not to, I should think. But yes – same as you – I tried not for ages. And then I couldn't not any longer – and I suppose that's part of the reason I'm here. I want to go and see Harry – have you seen him?'
Ignoring an irrational pang of – jealousy, was it? - that he wasn't the only reason for Sirius's return to England, Remus replied, 'No, no I haven't, not since he was about one and they gave him to his aunt and uncle to look after. He must be -' he counted up on his fingers, 'thirteen or fourteen by now… and he's at Hogwarts. Severus told me.'
Sirius nodded.
It was this which made Remus suddenly, forcibly, realise that his friend really was grown up. "He used to never miss the chance to criticise Severus," Remus thought. "But now – things are more important – less clear. It's not just black – Black – and white anymore, and he knows it."
'You're looking very thoughtful,' he said suddenly, and Remus jumped.
'Oh, just thinking about – things,' he smiled. "We should go and see Harry together," he decided. "Would Sirius want to come with me?"
And at that moment, Sirius said, 'I'm going to write to Dumbledore – do you want to come with me?'
Remus laughed. 'You read my mind!' And he couldn't explain to even himself just how happy the idea made him.
'Let's do it tonight, after skating.'
'Sounds good...'
