Affections for an Idle Heart
By Zye
I do not own the TMNT characters; we should all know who does (sighs).
An epic story trailing a coupling between Raphael and Donatello; adult theme slash (?) relations
Could a wounded heart ever learn to love again?
'Confrontations' (Chapter 7)
Raphael agilely dashed up the stairs; he was still soaking wet and naked except for a towel sloppily tied around his waist. His pace slackened as he drew near to his bedroom door and took a brief moment to glance over his shoulder towards the common area where he had eluded his youngest brother, Michelangelo, undetected.
An egotistical smirk spread across his face as he marveled at his own masterful getaway. Whoa, that was so close…Damn I'm good! Don didn't even see me slip past Mikey.The mere thought of Donatello softened his smirk into a dreamy half grin, Donnie wasn't too bad either, very resourceful that one is…"With a soft sigh, Raph went into his room and flipped on the light.
Raphael immobilized almost immediately as his eyes fell upon his elder brother, Leonardo, who was sitting on the edge of the bed. Startled, Raph swayed slightly in the doorway. Leo's eyes slowly met his brother's, "Nice towel Raph, a little early for a shower; don't you think?"
Raph felt his cheeks burn red; he couldn't believe that he'd been caught red bandana-less by the fearless leader…of all turtles. Raph glared bitterly at his brother, "Damn it Leo, What the hell are you doing in my room?!?" He stomped angrily to the small wooden table which normally housed his gear and suddenly realized that he'd left them in Donnie's room. "Oops" he muttered.
Leonardo sternly stared at his hot-tempered little brother, "Oops?" he furiously shook his head and stood up in a strong defensive stance, "This has deteriorated way beyond Oops, Raphael. For years I've turned a blind eye to your self-destructive promiscuous behaviors hoping that it was just a phase. But I will not tolerate this…"
Inside Raph's heart endured searing stabs of pain as his chest seemed to constrict around it. He snapped around to face Leo and growled through his clenched teeth, "What the hell are you yakking about now? I haven't done nothing…now get out of my room!"
Leonardo closed his eyes and sighed, "I saw you Raphael. I saw you with Donatello. I know what you've been doing to him." Leo looked directly into his brother's dark brown eyes and chose his words carefully, "I know you've been hurting for a long time Raph but randomly sleeping with anybody and everybody isn't going to make your pain go away."
Raphael slowly swallowed the lump in the back of his throat then swiftly turned away from Leo and grumbled, "What would you know about it anyway? Just go away."
Leo took a step closer to Raph, "You know using him like that is way over the line Raphael." Leonardo firmly placed his hand on Raph's shoulder, "You know it's wrong."
Raphael's muscles tensed under Leo's strong grasp, "It isn't…I mean…I swear it's not like that Leo…I…I care about Don and I'm gonna try ta do things right…this time."
Leo skeptically raised an eye ridge, "Really? So you haven't had any of your nightmares lately?"
Raphael's eyes narrowed angrily, "They're just stupid dreams, Leo. They don't fucking mean anything!" he snarled.
Leo closed his eyes and nodded solemnly, "Just think about what you're doing to him. Do you really want to be responsible for hurting Donatello, your little brother?" Leonardo released his brother's shoulder and left him alone; hoping that this time Raphael would heed his warning.
Raph exhaled with relief when he heard the door click shut, and fell back onto his bed. His wiser brother's words weighed heavily on his mind, he certainly didn't wish to hurt Donnie but the truth was he had cherished every moment they had spent together. If he could only block out those nightmares then maybe just maybe he could love Don.
Donatello sighed dreamily as he rubbed his cheek against a length of red cloth. His olfactory perception detected a faint musky odor lingering within its intricate knots, the masculine aroma of his heart's desire. He chuckled softly and grazed a finger along Raph's tattered leather belt; apparently he's as rough on his gear as he is on my… Donnie's cheeks flushed. He carefully folded the red bandana and placed it neatly on his bed next to Raphael's other forgotten items.
Fortunately, Donnie had had barely enough time to hide the evidence of Raphael's 'sleep over', shoving the items under his bed, just before Michelangelo excitedly burst into his room. Don kept a box of miscellaneous treats especially for his playful little brother, normally used to distract Mikey when he wanted to work on his inventions without interruptions. It had worked like a charm; Mikey giddily mauled his new prize and streaked back to the common area to play with it.
The back of Don's neck prickled alerting him to a presence behind him…watching him; casually he glanced over his shoulder and coolly hushed, "Come in, I know you're out there Raphael."
Raphael pushed open Don's door and hesitated briefly in the open doorway, "How'd ya know it was me?"
Donnie grinned and held up Raph's bandana, "Had a feeling you'd drop by." As nonchalantly as he was physically capable Don strolled towards his older brother and placed the forgotten cloth in Raph's hand. Raphael simply nodded and proceeded to tie his color snuggly over his eyes.
Don beamed at Raph and encircled his arms around his brawny brother's shoulders; "You are truly amazing, I thought for sure we'd been caught," he giggled and shook his head with admiration, "I knew you were good but…Wow!"
Raphael dropped his eyes momentary and warily grinned; he wrapped his arms around Don's waist. "Yeah" he cleared his throat, "you were pretty damn good too" he said softly.
Donnie studied his usually cocky brother's face and wondered, he's being modest…this is new…he must love me! Don tilted his head a little to the side as he leaned forward then passionately kissed his older brother.
Raph reluctantly hesitated then opened his mouth allowing Donnie's tongue to snake inside. Donnie's tongue slowly teased the warm, wet flesh along the walls of Raph's mouth then encouragingly stroked his brother's tongue. Raphael took the cue and their tongues wrestled hungry for one another's taste.
Don nipped gently at Raph's lower lip and pulled away to glance at the clock. With a loud sigh, Donnie gazed back into Raphael's eye, "I guess we better get to practice," he whined and pouted his bottom lip.
Raphael's shoulders tensed at the thought of sparing with Leonardo and solemnly nodded in reply. Don's brow scrunched with concern, "Are you ok? Ya seem kind-of quiet all of a sudden."
"Yeah, I'm fine," Raph lied then moved to retrieve the rest of his gear and quickly strapped them on. "Let's go before they send out a search party," he smirked trying to sound causal.
Don scrutinized his brother tense demeanor and concluded that something must be wrong, "Raph" he said meekly and bit his bottom lip, "Are you…are you getting…bored with me or something?"
Raphael's mouth gapped open as he connected with his brother's uncertain eyes and shook his head, "No…no Don I'm not…I just…" he closed his eyes tight, "its not you…I just…need to…some time to…" he felt a lump constricting his airway, "I like you, a lot" he finally choked out. Raph boldly stepped over to Donnie and took his hands, "believe me I do…but I think I'm gonna fuck it up because…" Raph squeezed Don's hand and look away, "I don't want to stop."
Donatello had expected Raphael's response to be more sarcastically evasive than soul bearing. It's clear that he does care about me, in one way or another. It is possible that Raph may even love me too unfortunately he seems to view love as a vulnerability which would explain his distress. Perhaps we are moving a little fast. He gazed into Raph's perplexed eyes and smiled warmly, "I don't want this to stop either."
Raph sighed with relief and kissed Donnie before they headed off to the dojo for their morning lessons.
Raphael,
Last night you asked
If I had any fantasies well
Put on this tool belt and meet me in the lab
There is a loose connection
Under my desk that needs to be repaired, if you think
You can handle it tough guy.
Leo's out doing some more Extra training with Mike,
So we should have enough time to play
I can't wait to get my hands on you!
XXOO
Donnie
Raphael slyly smirked as he strapped the tool belt around his waist, "Yup, I'm a bad influence on that one," he snickered to himself. Casually he strolled down the hall, prepared to cater to his little brother's 'loose connection.' He paused briefly at the door to the lab then knocked softly.
"Enter," commanded a voice from within the sealed room.
Raph slowly opened the door and peered cautiously inside. Donatello was seated in front of his computer attired in a white lab coat with a pocket protector, of all things. He cleared his throat and spoke clearly, "Did you call for a…ahh…handy man Professor, sir?"
Don crossly glared the turtle in the doorway, "yes, like three hours ago; there is a connection loose somewhere beneath the desk, I'm very busy and I want you to fix it immediately without disturbing my research," he huffed, cracking a faint smile.
"Yes sir…no problem, I can work in tight places," the handy turtle reassured. Then crouched under Don's desk and wheeled his chair snugly in behind him.
Michelangelo panted heavy and leaned against the doorway clutching his side. He shook his head furiously and stated to himself, "No more!" He grinded his teeth and stormed down the hall to confront his so called 'best friend.'
Dramatically he burst into the lab and threw his arms into the air, "What's up with you lately Don!?!?" he demanded.
Don snapped his head forward from his 'stretch' and shifted forward awkwardly closer to his desk, "Mikey…errr…uhmm…this isn't a good time bro," he gasped in shock.
Mike's eyes narrowed and he paced the floor wildly gesturing with his arms, "It's never a good time anymore! What ever happened to watchin each other's backs…you know pairin' together for training! Do you have any idea how many miles Leo had me run this week!?!?"
Raphael insidiously smirked then proceeded to take the length of Don throbbing cock deep into his mouth. Don bit his bottom lip to muffle a faint moan then swatted at him ineffectively; Raph had no intention to stop.
Don shook his head and tried to focus on his ranting little brother, "Please Mikey I'm…ahhh…really" he sharply inhaled with a restrained look of torture, "I'm busy Mike…please go," he pleaded then turned away.
Mike angrily gawked at his brother, "You're always too busy! You never pay any attention to me anymore! The only one you even talk to anymore is the Psycho…" he shook his head.
Raph raised an eye brow and nipped at the tender flesh at the tip…
"Ouch…errr…Th...That's not true…I…pleassse stop…I…do pay attention to you Mikey…" he sighed raspy.
Mike lowered his head defeated and slouched his shoulders, "No…you haven't for months now…and I feel like I lost my best friend…" he sniffed and buried his face in his hands for a moment then sadly gazed at Donatello.
Raphael pulled carefully away from the pulsating flesh and tilted his head to hear better…
Don's face was flushed and he trembled slightly from the sensory overload, his eyes welled sympathetically as he stared at his little brother, "Oh Mike…I…I…don't mean to ignore you…" Quickly he crammed his now painfully protesting organ back under his shell and returned his gaze to Mike.
Raph sensed unspoken confliction as Don's body tensed…
"No…you like Raph best now..." Mikey gurgled as tears streamed shamelessly from his eyes.
"Mike, you're my best friend. You know that. And Raph and I...uhmmm…well…" Don stalled uncertain of how he could possibly explain…
Raph slowly placed a hand upon Don's thigh and squeezed gently, reassuring his brother to do whatever he felt was necessary.
Donnie glanced down at his older brother with a weak smile of gratitude across his lips and took Raph's hand in his. Slowly he pushed back from his desk and pulled the concealed turtle into Mike's view. They stood side by side hand in hand and nervously awaited their little brother's reaction.
"Wha…wh…" Mikey murmured, utterly baffled by his hot-headed brother sudden appearance. His eyes darted frantically from Don…hands…Raph...Don…hands…
Raph…Don…hands…Raph?!? "Wha…wh were you doing under Don's desk?" he finally managed to muttered, his confused eyes locked on Raphael.
Raph's eyes widen slightly and he shrugged saying, "ahh I was…ahh…fixing…" cleared his throat and his eyes dropped to the ground, "Just helping Don out…that's all…"
Donnie squeezed Raph's hand and looked empathically at their stunned little brother, "Raph and I are…err uhm…"
Mikey shook his head with wide frightened eyes as it dawned on him what was going on, "no…no…no way…why? How? When?" His eyes searched Donatello for answers…
Don cleared his throat, his eyes pleaded with Mike for understanding, "It just sort-of happened…"
Mikey slowly swallowed the lump in the back of his throat then stabbed his eyes at Raph and took a threatening step towards him, Raph held his ground. "There is only one thing I want from you Raphael," he demanded as his eyes narrowed, "you're gonna train with Leo again," he shyly cracked a grin and shook his head, "I just can't take it anymore!"
Raph exhaled in disbelief and nodded, "you got it, bro, anything!"
Mike giggled nervously as he scanned his two brothers then tilted his head to the side and asked, "Ahh…Raph, what's with the tool belt, anyway?
Raph opened his mouth then thought better of it and shook his head, "Didn't mean to hog Donnie all to myself bro why don't I just..." He let go of Don's hand and headed towards the exit with a wide grin on his face. He paused beside Mike a placed a hand on his shoulder, "Thanks bro."
Mike nodded in response and watched Raphael exit before turning his attention back to Donatello. There was concern in his eyes for his best friend, "Why him? I mean I'm glad he's on our side…but Don he's a Psycho."
"Personally I think he's just misunderstood, that all" sighed Don patiently, "I love him Mike…for a long time now…that's why."
"Just be careful Donnie, he can be a real heart breaker from what I've heard," Mike threw his arms around his brother, "But I'll stand by ya no matter what you and Raph do."
"Thank you. You are truly the best, best friend a turtle could ever hope for," Don warmly smiled and hugged Mike close.
---
Leonardo clenched his hand into tight ball at what he had just overheard from the shadows in the hall. His eyes grew cold and determined, "No I will not let this happen to him! I'm going to put a stop to this now," he muttered under his breath. Swiftly he tracked down the hall and caught his hot-headed brother off guard. He grabbed Raph firmly on the bicep and proceeded to drag him out into the sewer tunnel.
