Hopefully the explanation I give for Clint getting preggers makes sense but even if it doesn't, guess what? It doesn't have to because guys can't get pregnant in real life ;0, just in case you didn't know that. The next few chapters after this will mostly deal with Clint raising his children.

I Dream of Loki

Chapter 7: To Lose A Lover Only To Gain A Child

"You're still going aren't you?"

"Huh?" Bruce raises his head from the notes he'd been pouring over and takes his glasses off.

"To Tony's New Year party?"

"Yeah, sure."

"You don't have to if you don't want Clint. I was thinking about sitting this one out too."

"It's fine. I need to get out." He gives me a frown, shakes his head and returns to what he was doing. I continue tossing the small stress ball around. Loki's been gone for almost two weeks and I'm nervous. I haven't heard anything from him or Thor who went with him. We'd gotten into a pretty heated argument before he left. I called him an idiot plus a few other not so nice names for deciding to see Odin. He kept saying that he wanted a life with me but wouldn't be able to live in peace if he was constantly worried about Odin and what he would do. I just knew he'd end up like the Loki from my dreams and it terrified me more because of how much I love him. We parted on bad terms. I had hoped he would've returned by Christmas. I got him a custom made throwing knife set since I'd seen quite a few around his penthouse. Thor said he preferred weapons that were small and could be easily concealed. I thought the knives would be perfect. Even giftwrapped it myself. I stayed up all of Christmas Eve like I was waiting for Santa. Eventually Tony and Steve came over to wait with me, saying I shouldn't be alone. When Loki never came, we all headed to the mansion where Natasha and Sam had cooked. I shake my head to clear my thoughts and grab the coffee mug from the table. Bruce had mentioned something about not drinking anything in the lab, ever but this stuff looks okay. It looks like tea. I take a sip, like it and down the rest of the mug in a matter of seconds. When I finish, I decide to take Scooby for a walk.

"Headed out Bruce." He mumbles something I don't catch. "Hey, whatever you had in that cup was great. You should get some more!" I tell him as I toss him the stress ball. He frowns again as he catches it.

"What are you talking about?" I point to it and wave, leaving a confused Bruce behind. There isn't much going on in the rest of the house. Everyone's gone except Steve who's taking a nap on the sofa. I get Scooby and head to the door.

"Clint! I was just getting ready to ring the doorbell." Reed Richards is standing there with a lab coat on over his Fantastic Four uniform. If I had to hazard I guess, I'd say he hasn't been to sleep in awhile.

"Bruce is in the lab. Where's Johnny?"

"He and Ben went grocery shopping."

"That's funny Reed."

"I'm serious." That sounds like an accident waiting to happen. I'm tempted to ask which one just so I can have some entertainment for a bit but then I decide against it. The last time I got caught up in an argument of theirs, fireballs were thrown as were couches. "Did Bruce tell you about the plant Frigga sent him?"

"If he did, I probably wasn't listening."

"It's amazing Clint! I'll give you the short version. Thor's people have figured out a way for males to have children using this plant. It's crushed and mixed in with a drink. After the patient consumes it, it works its way through the system causing certain things needed for carrying a baby to grow, such as eggs and a uterus. Once the patient engages in sex, the body keeps any semen and sends it to the waiting egg causing fertilization. The plant doesn't create an opening for the baby to be birthed through however so it has to be cut out but it's still an amazing process. We've both finally gotten the time to study the whole thing." Men having babies? Now that I'd have to see to believe, I don't care how advanced Asgard's tech is.

"Sounds awesome Reed and by awesome I mean boring so me and Scooby are going for a wal-" I feel a little dizzy.

"Clint are you okay?!" Actually I'm not. I want to puke and almost do but I catch myself. I sink to my knees trying to keep my lunch from earlier down. Scooby licks my face as Reed examines me. "What did you eat?"

"Grilled cheese."

"Let's get you inside." Reed helps me to my feet since I can barely walk with my head spinning as bad as it is.

"What happened?!" Steve goes to my other side. Both ease me onto the couch.

"I'm not sure. One moment he was fine, the next…." Reed examines me once more. "You were in the lab before, did you ingest anything?"

"No….wait yeah I did."

"Clint! Bruce has said a million times never eat or drink anything you find down there!" Steve scolds.

"I thought it was tea."

"Lay down," Reed orders. "I'll get some water and a cloth. You're sweating bullets." The rest of the day goes by in a blur of puke, water and cold. It bothers Bruce because he can't remember what was in the mug. Reed says my symptoms seem flu like but I can tell he's bothered by something. By the time Tony returns, I'm a pathetic mess. My dreams of Loki have begun mixing with nightmares of what could've happened to him. Somehow, I think Steve carried me, they get me to my room. Bruce and Reed are in and out every fifteen minutes it seems. Tony sits in a chair by my bed and when the alarm goes off, Steve assures him he can handle it alone. I finally fall into a fitful sleep.

"How long has he been like this?" It sounds like Natasha. "You should've called me."

"I thought he might get better." Tony sounds grim.

"He looks awful," Sam adds.

"Thanks," My eyes finally open. I give him a weak smile.

"God Clint, this will forever be a cautionary of why we should listen when Bruce tells us to not eat food from down there."

"I've learned my lesson."

"How do you feel?"

"I'll be fine Tasha." I can tell she doesn't believe me.

"Bruce and Reed have been running all kinds of tests. They should have it figured out soon but until then stay in the bed Clint. You had us worried." I can't remember the last time I saw Tony this serious.

"But I feel fine."

"Let's do this another way." Natasha crosses her arms. "You leave that bed and you'll have a broken leg."

"I think I'm going to get some rest guys." Sam smiles then gives me a pat on the shoulder. Steve appears with a tray of food. He even has an apron on. After I eat to their satisfaction they leave me alone for a bit. I spend most of my day ignoring worried calls from Bobbi and my brother, who the hell told them anyway?


By the time the New Year's party rolls around on Tuesday, I'm feeling much better but still have dizzy spells. I've sat out the last couple of Avengers missions and Natasha has told SHIELD I'm out of commission for a bit. Bruce and Reed have yet to figure out what was wrong with me and I know it's killing Bruce that he can't remember what was in the mug. If he did then he'd know exactly what he was searching for in all my scans. I'm lounging on the couch with Scooby next to me as everyone is getting ready. Rhodey and I are watching some ghost hunter show. They're all leaving together in the same limo if they can get dressed. Sam lost his suit but found it an hour later under his bed. Natasha couldn't decide which dress to wear. Pepper didn't help because she liked both dresses and thought Tasha would look amazing in either. Steve had to polish his shoes because he didn't feel they were shiny enough. Tony and Bruce couldn't even keep their noses out a new project long to get dressed until Steve ordered them to.

"You guys are gonna be late," I mutter.

"You're not going?" Rhodey asks.

"Sitting this one out. Me and Scooby plan on watching Ghost Hunters all night."

"If I knew that was an option I never would've agreed to go."

"Too late now!" Tony says striding into the room. "Let's go! Party limo is leaving the building. Don't wait up Hawkguy."

"Have fun." I go to the door to watch them all leave and to swear to Tony I won't let any bad guys in. As soon as they're gone, I return to the TV. I'm not sure how long the dog and I are down there, maybe only an hour or it could've been two. All I know is that eventually something causes me to look towards the doorway. Loki is standing there in a suit. He's holding the jacket on one arm and playing with one of the custom knives I got him in his other hand.

"Loki."

"Clint." I try to seem indifferent even though I'm beyond happy to see him.

"I see you found my present."

"I stopped by your apartment, thinking you might be there and found the box addressed to me. I apologize for not being here on Christmas."

"Not a big deal. What did Odin say?" Loki stops playing with the knife, his focus entirely on me now.

"I will be placed on house arrest essentially for as long as he decides which could be anywhere from a few days to years."

"Damn it Loki." I sigh as I run a hand over my face. I hear his footsteps coming closer. One of his hands pulls mine down. Loki kneels in front of me, lacing our fingers together.

"You understand why I did it though?"

"Yes but that doesn't mean you should've."

"We already discussed this Clint. I have no wish to argue with you. Stark said you were sick."

"When'd you see him?"

"He left a message on Thor's phone about a party. When we arrived after checking your apartment, he said you were here and that you'd been horribly sick the past few days."

"I'm fine Loki. We were talking about you."

"A subject which I don't want to discuss." God he can be so frustrating! He slips an arm around me, pulling me closer. "Let's talk later little bird."

"Loki…"

"Please." Loki doesn't beg or plead, too much ego for that. So when that one word leaves his mouth it surprises me. As I stare at him I realize he's hiding something but I go with his request and drop it. Instead I kiss his nose. "Tonight I have no intention of letting you rest just so we're clear." If Loki could, we'd probably spend every day having sex and doing nothing else. Even when we're not, he's always thinking of the quickest way to get me to his bed.

"What if I don't feel like it? I was actually watching something before you interrupted." I move his head a bit to catch the rest of Ghost Hunters.

"You're not serious."

"I sure as hell am. I know it's all fake but it's still entertaining. Especially since I'm getting ideas for a new prank." Without warning I'm lifted and thrown over his shoulder. "WHAT THE HELL! Put me down! LOKI!"

"I like that. Keep practicing screaming my name." He laughs as he heads for my room.

"Scooby attack!" He whines then turns back down the hall sniffing the air.

"I left him a steak or four where he could reach it." Some guard dog he's turning out to be. Once we're in my room, he lays me gently on the bed and leans down so our foreheads touch. Something is definitely bothering him. My worries are momentarily pushed aside when his fingers move underneath my shirt.


"Wakey wakey Hawkguy! You've been sleeping all day." Tony is standing over me with Scooby beside him. The dog jumps onto the bed to lick me.

"Alright I'm up. What time is it?" I ask shoving Scooby away.

"Almost noon. You missed a hell of a party last night. I think there's muffins left if you want one." I sit up and look on the other side of the bed. Loki's not there. I yawn then swing my legs over the side. God it hurts to move.

"Where's Loki?"

"Loki?"

"Yeah Tony. Where is he? He was here last night."

"In Asgard."

"What are you talking about?"

"Thor went back with him last night. He left to serve his sentence. He didn't tell you?"

"He never said when!"

"Well according to Thor, Odin allowed him to return to spend one last night with you…." His voice trails off as he watches me. I'm shaking in anger right now. Why wouldn't he have told me that? Now his behavior made sense last night. How he held me, why he kept telling me he loved me, etc. Son of a bitch! "Clint, calm down."

"Why didn't he tell me Tony! I could've…I would've…damn!" I toss my pillow across the room and catch sight of a letter underneath. I know it's from him. Sure enough when I open it, I recognize his handwriting.

To my little bird,

I apologize for not telling you everything. I couldn't once I saw you. Yes it was selfish and I'm sure I hurt you. Please forgive me. Thor tried to get Odin to give me more time with you but he was adamant that one night was all. I love you more than anything else in this wretched universe which means I want you to be happy. I hope that one day you will move on and have a family. Do not wait for me. Odin has made it clear this will be no short sentence and I won't have you wasting away wishing and hoping for my return. You will always have my heart Clint even if you do find someone else.

Loki

I ease myself onto the floor, reading the letter again and again. Wordlessly, Tony sits beside me.

"Tony?"

"Hmmm?"

"He was an asshole."

"Yep."

"I want to punch him."

"Anyone would."

"I want to hate him, to say 'fuck you' and go on with my life. The whole reason I went searching for him was so this wouldn't happen and he's fucked everything up."

"I'd be pissed to."

"I mean shit like this isn't supposed to happen. I have dreams about another Loki and decide to find the one here because I'm worried about him. I only wanted to be his friend. If I was just his friend then maybe it wouldn't hurt so bad. I'd be upset but I'd move on yet I can't now. I don't want to."

"Because you love him."

"Yeah…because I love him." Tony puts a hand on my shoulder.

"Love was never meant to be easy Hawkguy."

"I know." I smile as a memory comes back to me. "Remember when he changed all of Sam's towels to bright pink?"

"Of course I do! Sam thought we did it!" Tony snaps a finger. "What about that time he convinced Thor with a straight face that the Loch Ness monster indeed exists. He was gone for three days trying to find it in Scotland."

"Sir, Director Fury is here." JARVIS announces.

"Did you tell him I'm not here?"

"I did. He did not believe me."

"Well there goes my day. You okay Clint?"

"No but I will be. Thanks Tony."

"I told you that's what friends are for. Now let's go see what Fury wants."


"No Cap. I said I'm fine."

"You're clearly not Clint!" He snatches off his mask. We're all in the conference room, fresh off of stopping a few rogue A.I.M idiots. I might've had a little accident during it. "You were too busy throwing up!" Alright maybe a huge accident. One in which I got sick just as one of the guys fired shots at me. Luckily Cap jumped in front of me in time.

"He's right Clint. If you were still feeling sick why didn't you sit this one out?" So now Tasha's on his side? Traitor.

"No offense but you haven't been right since whatever you drank in the lab," Sam adds. It's true. I've felt run down a lot but nothing that should keep me laying around. "You've been tired a lot too like you haven't been sleeping well which boggles my mind since you sleep more than any of us now."

"We are all worried about you." Thor has taken a bit more protective of me than normal. I'm not exactly sure but I think he and Loki had an agreement that he should watch over me.

"Tony you too?" I turn to him. He's sitting in one of the chairs, feet on the table with his face plate off as he munches a cookie.

"I've been telling you myself for weeks. Why do you think I have Bruce run tests and all that while you're sleep?"

"He does what?!" There's a collective groan as they all glare at Tony.

"Forgot we were keeping that a secret."

"Clint we just want you to be okay," Steve sets his shield down. "You've been pushing yourself pretty hard lately. Maybe you need a break." Ever since Loki had left, I'd thrown myself into working out, practicing my archery day and night, anything so I wouldn't think about him.

"Why won't you guys listen! I said I'm-"

"Pregnant!"

"What?" We all look towards the doorway. Reed is standing there out of breath.

"I'm sorry, I ran all the way here. Bruce look at these!" He rushes over to him. They both stand there for several minutes going over papers and mumbling to themselves.

"Reed who is pregnant?" Tasha finally he asks.

"Clint." I'm pretty sure all of our mouths drop open.

"Wait. What? I thought you just said that I, a male, am pregnant."

"I did."

"How?" Thor takes a step closer to me.

"The plant you brought us!" Bruce answers, excitement pretty damn evident in his voice. "I couldn't remember what had been in that coffee mug but now I do. I'd mixed the plant up because Reed and I were going to give it to a mouse to record what happens. You drank it Clint." Holy. Shit.

"These scans we've been doing of your body have showed us how your organs have moved around over these past few weeks to accommodate the feti. It was slow at first which is why didn't note the changes right after you ingested it. This all makes sense now."

"Guys can't get pregnant!" Sam states. "What is this? The Twilight Zone?"

"On Asgard a small plant was discovered almost twenty five years ago that changes the body of any males who eat it." Thor explains. "They studied the animals who ate it and how the males were able to bear children, not in the same way as females but still able to none the less. Bruce requested a sample."

"I thought I'd lost it."

"I'm pregnant? Shit. Shit. SHIT!" Loki and I pretty much fucked that entire night before he left.

"Calm down Clint." Thor places a hand on me to keep me steady.

"But if you think about it, it does make sense," Steve says. "The tiredness, vomiting every so often and his sudden love of Taco Bell when before you couldn't pay him to eat that stuff."

"There may be other symptoms since this will be the first time a human has ever ingested the plant," Reed tells us. "I'd like to stay on as your doctor Clint."

"We both do," Bruce added.

"Let's rewind for a second." Tony had been abnormally quiet through this whole thing. "Bruce you said 'feti' earlier. Feti is plural for fetus." Bruce gives a nod then rubs a hand over his neck nervously.

"Well it looks like so far you're having twins Clint."

"T-twins?" Everyone's watching me anxiously. "You gotta be kidding me. Thor?"

"Yes?"

"Heimdall is watching right?" He'd told us stories before about the Asgardian who sees all.

"He is. Why?"

"If I give him a message do you think he'll give it to Loki?"

"Yes. But what kind of message?" Instead of answering, I look up to the ceiling and raise both middle fingers. Fuck him.