7

HELP ME!

Vincent rose early the next morning, still mentally griping to himself, and Chaos when it would listen, which was becoming less and less often as it got sick of his little soap opera, and, leaving a note for Cid on his dresser --The pilot was sound asleep, and Vincent reckoned that he would be for quite a while still, but didn't want to leave him feeling deserted if Cid did wake up before he returned -- tromped off through the snow towards the City of Wutai, again.

Vincent wasn't in a foul mood. Not in the least. If he was, he'd be acting far too much like Cid and he would have absolved the problem as soon as possible anyway.

It was actually a gorgeous morning. It had snowed in the late evening the day before, but the small snow shower had passed, and today the skies were clear and cloudless, a pale steel blue almost disappearing into the snow at the horizon, only the towering silhouettes of the mountain ranges lining the northern end of the island breaking the perfect blend of the shades of blue, gray and white. Icicles hung off the rope ladder that allowed Vincent to climb out of the Highwind and down to solid ground. Thinking them quaint, Vincent had done his best not to disturb any of them.

Now he found himself again at the same rustic little shop at the edge of town, more icicles hanging from the sign hanging casually under the small overhang sheltering the entrance. He noticed with a small smile that holy and mistletoe accompanied the icicles, giving it a very natural twist to the holiday look. He pushed open the worn door, the small tinkle of a bell around the doorknob ringing crisply in his ears, and stepped in.

And heaved a sigh.

It was warm, cheerfully so, and smelt of cinnamon and vanilla, and gingerbread cookies. A small fire was lit in a previously dark fireplace in the corner, and a few candles, apparently the source of the heartwarming smells, were lit about the shop in safe places, their soft glow adding to the gentle clear light of Nicks' shop.

"My, you're quite the early riser, Mr. Valentine." Came the cheerful voice from behind the counter. Vincent turned to shoot Nicholas a smile, nodding.

"I suppose I am. Good morning Nicholas."

"Mornin'! Care for some tea?" The jolly shopkeeper offered. "You 'n Cid's favorite!" Vincent chuckled softly, shaking his head.

"No thank you."

"Well then, what brings a man like yourself out into the world so early on this fine morning?" Vincent had the fleeting thought that perhaps Nick already knew. "I know you already did your Christmas shopping!" He winked. Vincent felt himself stumble mentally for a moment.

"Walking off a few troubles, is all." He looked around the merry shop. "And found myself here. This shop is like a magnet to me…" He added softly in wonder. Nicholas beamed.

"You'd be amazed how many people say that, Vincent." He paused, sipping his tea with relish. "Can I ask what's bothering you?" He began suddenly, and Vincent felt a sudden wash of cold go through the pit of his stomach. "I might be able to help you out some. People say I'm good at that, if nothing else." Vincent remained silent for a very long time, thinking, and looking Nicholas over. He wasn't a very open person to begin with, and though he felt like he and Nicholas had been friends forever, he barely knew the man, and felt no small amount of apprehension towards sharing his innermost feelings and secrets.

Nicholas had actually opened his mouth to tell Vincent he wouldn't press the matter if it bothered him when Vincent finally spoke.

"You told me to strengthen my friendship with Cid." He began suddenly, almost holding his breath as he spoke. Nicholas nodded slowly. "You can see I was highly successful in that aspect." He went on. Nicholas grinned warmly. "I can't express how wonderful it is to have a /friend/…" Vincent said, his previous loneliness seeping into his voice. "But… I fear that my feelings for Cid may have grown beyond what they should have… I think I --" He broke off, not really wanting to stumble around in the dark of his feelings when it was clear that Nicholas got the point. The man's face was alight with something mixed between utter joy and surprise, and a little bit of despair for Vincent's confusion. The old man was quiet for a while, chewing his lip thoughtfully, pulling all his thoughts together into sentences, taking his time with what he wanted to tell Vincent.

"Well, Vincent, this is a magical time of year. A person can discover a lot about himself. And I'll have you know that it is very rare for those discoveries to not be for the better. The holidays are a season ruled by the heart." He looked up, an intense glimmer in his stare. "Follow your heart, Vincent," He said firmly, then added more softly, "and don't try to think too hard on what it's telling you. You'll understand what its saying in time, and when you do, it'll be as clear as an ice-glazed morning." Vincent resisted the urge to bite his lip, nodding.

"Thank you, Nicholas." He said softly.

"Please, call me Nick."

"Alright. Thank you, Nick." Vincent amended, trying to smile against the flood of emotions that Nicholas' speech had let loose inside of him. He headed toward the door, eager to be alone.

"Vincent," Nicholas called after him just as he was preparing to leave. "Make sure you still give him that painting!" Vincent turned and shot him a smile.

"Of course I will," He said softly, bittersweet fear, but also a certain determination in his eyes. His parting image of Nicholas was the older man giving him the 'thumbs up'.

Cid woke up slowly, appreciating a slow morning. He felt hyperactive and alert, but reveled in his awareness of the warmth of his bed, and the soft bluish sunlight coming through his window. Slowly, he sat up, glancing around his room as he always did, looking for something interesting to look at.

He found such a thing, even though he hadn't expected it. A piece of paper, folded in two so it stood on its ends on his bedside table. Blinking in surprise, Cid snatched it up, and squinted slightly, focusing his eyes, before finally honing in on the neat handwriting, reading the short note.

Cid,

Went for a walk. Will be back shortly. Go back to sleep and rest up.

--Vincent

Cid blinked. Ookkaay…Past his surprise at Vincent bothering to leave him a note, however, Cid had to smile softly to himself. Vincent wrote like a girl.

This wasn't exactly a bad thing. Personally, Cid had the most incredibly illegible handwriting known to mankind. Plus, half the time, he wrote in shorthand, or engineer's code abbreviations, and no one but perhaps his closest crewmen, and maybe Shera, could read it. Every now and then, Cid was put to having to produce something /readable/ and had to take great pains to make sure every figure was clear, every word properly written.

It usually took him hours.

Vincent's handwriting, he noticed with a smirk, was the complete opposite. It was a tight, neat script that looped with grace, but not over extravagance. Cid frowned a little. It looked like his mothers, only neater. He hadn't thought that had been possible.

Still, he wasn't surprised in the least. He looked at the way Vincent had signed his own name, in that same, neat and tidy script. Only the capital 'V' had an elaborate swirl in its leading tail, the rest tight, and almost modest, as if begging to go unnoticed, just like Vincent himself. Cid smiled, looking at his own short name at the top of the page. The 'C' had that same artistic flare, though not quite as obvious or easily written. It looked good.

Cid imagined his name written in his own handwriting as shaky and with the 'C' facing backwards. He snorted. It was self-degrading but pretty funny.

Deciding he didn't want the wrath of Vincent Valentine to fall upon him, however, Cid obeyed, even though he wanted nothing more than to be free and play. Maybe, if I'm good, he reasoned, we can go out together later or something.

Go out together?! The fuck?!

Yes, that just about summed it up, right there. Cid felt himself blush hotly, and sank under the covers again, burying his face. What was he thinking?!

Must be a fever. Maybe he was relapsing?

Cid felt his forehead with the back of his hand, and frowned. Powder fresh. He checked his pulse, pinched himself, shifted in bed, testing for any aches or pains or other discomforts, anything.

Hell, he hadn't felt this good, physically, in decades.

Cid groaned, and decided not to think on his strange state of mind, and simply rolled over and went back to sleep instead. No point in getting himself tied up in a knot when Vincent told him to rest.

Vincent Vincent Vincent. Cid sighed.

Whatever!

Returning back to the Highwind, Vincent's first impulse was to go and check on Cid. He felt a wave of heat go through him at the thought, and decided against it, retreating to his own room instead. He needed to be alone for a while. He picked up a book he'd brought along for the ride, expecting to be alone far more than he had been, and settled in to read all day. Cid could take care of himself.

Cid woke up again well past noon. It had been hours and he'd expected Vincent to have come back by now.

Maybe he did and I just didn't wake up enough to notice…

Well, either way, Cid couldn't sleep another moment. He'd had his share and then some, for quite a while, and just /could not/ sit still any longer. He thought he'd been doing pretty good, all things considered, but if Vincent was mad about him finally rising to meet the mid afternoon, well…that was his problem. Deciding to go and find his friend, Cid dressed, cleaned up for once, and wandered out into the rest of his ship.

He checked half the ship, even out on deck, but not finding Vincent, finally found his way back to his friend's bedroom door. He knocked.

"…Yes?"

"Vin!"

On the other side of the door, Vincent went cold, alarmed. He wasn't ready for this yet. What the logic behind that reasoning was, not even Vincent knew, but he was certain that he could not see Cid at the moment.

"Go back to bed, Cid!" He called back, not even moving towards the door. He grimaced. His tone had been rather cold.

"Fuck that, Vin!" Cid cried back, and went to push the door open. It was locked.

Vincent watched the doorknob rattle as Cid shook the whole door.

"Lemmie in, Vin!" Cid cried. He sounded mildly distressed. Vincent didn't answer. Cid shook the door. "C'mon, Vincent!" Cid pressed. "What's wrong? Why ya all holed up in yer room again!? I thought you were done with that type of shit!" Vincent grimaced at Cid's hurt tone. He stood, and walked over to the door, leaning against it.

"Cid," He began softly. He heard Cid shift a little outside.

"Open the door, man." Cid pushed.

"Cid, it---its not you. Don't worry. I--I just had a rough night, is all." Vincent insisted. Cid remained quiet.

"Hey… you wanna talk…?" He said after a moment. Vincent shook his head, then realized the door was still shut.

"No, Cid. I just need to be alone for a while." Vincent's heart had just about squeezed itself in two. Here Cid was, reaching out to him, just the way he would like to think he would want, and here he was, shrinking away, as if nothing had chanced in the eight years since he'd returned to reality. There was a snort in the back of his mind.

Great. Even Chaos was disgusted with him.

"Al-Alright." Cid said softly. "I'm gunna go out for a while. I feel like new today. I'll check back later." He paused again. "Take it easy, Vin." He finished. Vincent listened to his retreating footsteps, and turned, pressing his back against the door, and slid down to the soft carpet at his feet. He had the distinct feeling that Cid was trying very hard not to have his feelings hurt. He dipped his head to his knees, and didn't move any further.

Cid didn't actually have his feelings hurt, but he was horribly disappointed. He'd been anticipating another fun day with Vincent. He was acutely aware of how special his friendship with Vincent was, and had been quite proud with himself for being part of Vincent's sudden re-socialization.

Thought too soon, I guess.He wandered off into Wutai, properly bundled up this time, though he found himself wishing he had Vincent or his cloak to keep him warm again.

…!?!…

Vincent /or/ his cloak? Cid stopped mid step, wavering.

The emotion flooding through him was about the equivalent of a universal '…Erm…' , the lasting resonance bouncing off moons and planets and entire constellations, only to soar off into eternal black nothingness. The resulting silence afterwards also had a great similarity to that in Cid's mind.

Somewhere inside his head, the little man that turned the crank that kept the gears of his brain turning suffered an aneurysm and died.

Had anyone been looking, they would have seen Cid standing knee deep in snow, frozen cold, and blinking in shock, jaw slack, face surprised, arms loose at his sides.

It was a good thing no one had been looking.

Still, Cid was a tough man to shake. For long, anyway. He'd seen a lot in his life, and done even more, most of it incredibly insane or stupid, in retrospect, and after a moment of shock, he shook it off with a shrug, and went on with his march toward town.

He realized vaguely that he'd been doing that a lot: reflecting on Vincent in manners that he would not have expected himself to, but there was a first for everything, right?

Focusing on Vincent directly brought back Cid's concerns for the man, though, and he completely for got his own sudden mood swings.

That man needs a teddy bear or something…He thought vaguely, stepping through the main gates into Wutai, and pausing. All around was a sea of green and red over white, a spattering of gold fringes everywhere, lights, ribbons and bells and other beautiful, merry things. He blinked. Oh yeah. Christmas Day was in what…. Four days? He'd almost forgotten about it, having been completely consumed in his own sickness until today. Even yesterday, he realized, he had missed the cheer, even though he was certain it had been there then, too. Smiling, and thankful he'd brought his wallet, Cid found sudden inspiration.

Cid had already made several large orders that were presently being shipped back to the Highwind, when he wandered into one last, busy shop. He found Reeve, Yuffie and Tifa inside, all three bustling around, though it seemed like the ladies were dragging Reeve by a chain, invisible though it was. Cid, deciding to be amiable, chose to rescue the man.

"Reeve, my man!" Reeve turned, startled, and smiled wryly as he spotted Cid. He was a little paranoid by the pilot's cheer. It wasn't something he was used to.

"Hello, Cid." He said.

"Those brats draggin' you around?!" Cid went on, grinning. Reeve blinked, then pinkened around the nose a little.

"They wanted me to help select lingerie…" He groaned quietly. Cid laughed.

"C'mon, lets go look at tools 'n shit." He said, patting Reeve firmly on the back. Reeve stumbled with the force of it, coughing.

"Actually, Cid, I need to be getting back. I told Barret I would watch Marlene this afternoon…" Reeve muttered. Cid sighed.

"Awright then." He said, clapping Reeve's back again. He felt a little disappointed at Reeve's retreat.

"Good to see Vincent's nursed you back to health," Reeve added as even as he hurried to the store exit. Cid opened his mouth to respond, but the ex-spy had already escaped out the door. Forlorn, Cid decided to retreat from the shop himself before the girls, already eyeing him like hawks for reasons unknown, decided to swoop down and victimize him as well.

Tifa watched Cid retreat from the store and snorted to herself.

"Bastard didn't even say 'hi'." She sniffed. Yuffie looked up at her, startled.

"That's probably because you were glaring at him, Teef." She pointed out. Tifa frowned darkly.

"What is it with everyone?!" She cried, throwing her hands up in the air and startling several of the other shoppers around her. "First Vincent's acting all friendly, then Cid is labeled 'amiable' and now you're looking at /me/ like I've grown a second head!" Yuffie giggled.

"I'd rather sprout a head than some things, Tifa." She quipped. Tifa couldn't help but laugh at that.

"Point."

"Still, he let Reeve get away, too." Yuffie added, frowning. "That bastard!" She joked. They'd been teasing the mousy man all day, quite on purpose, and Yuffie was a little disappointed that Reeve had actually managed to get away. She'd thought they had him. Tifa laughed.

"So where to now?" The fighter asked, perking up after all of Yuffie's jokes.

"Um… Go spy on Cloud?" Yuffie suggested.

"Good idea!" Yuffie could only laugh at Tifa's sincere enthusiasm. Oh yes, go spy on Cloud. Undressing? Better yet! The young Shinobi managed by small margins to keep her mouth shut.

Cid found himself back at Nicholas'. There was a bizarre magnetism to the place, and Nick himself. Still, Cid liked both, and happily wandered inside, soaking in the array of warm feelings, both the decoration, smells, and physical warmth.

"Well well well! Look who we have here!" Nicholas came from a back room, beaming. He looked around. "And where, may I ask, Mr. Highwind, is your fine gothic companion?" Cid frowned.

"Locked, depressed, in his own room," Cid growled. Nicholas hid his own frown.

"Well what for?!" He asked, wondering if Vincent had perhaps confronted Cid and not gotten the results he would have wanted. Cid threw his hands up in the air.

"Not a clue! He wouldn't tell me a thing! Didn't even open up the door, just spoke through the damned wall, saying he 'needed to be alone for a while'!" Cid flopped down on a small padded bench near the front desk. "He used to do that all the time, it was just normal for him, but recently, he's been so outgoing I thought he was done with the moping…" Cid added, cooling down. "I swear, the guy needs a teddy bear or something…"

"Why don't you get him one then?" Nicholas suggested. Cid looked up, startled.

"Eh?" Cid scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Naah. It'd probably just embarrass or piss him off. He's a sensitive guy."

"On the contrary, I don't think it would upset him at all…" Nicholas pressed. He couldn't tell Cid Vincent's secret, because it wasn't his place, but he would do what he could to at least preserve their friendship, if nothing else.

"Are you kidding?! Me, give /anyone/ a teddy bear, let alone Vin?!" Cid cried, startled. "He'd think I was queer or something!" There was just a brief moment when Cid choked on his own tongue after the words had come out of his mouth that urged Nicholas to push his luck.

"Well, are you?" He asked flatly. Cid gawked.

"What?!"

"Are you?" Cid's cheeks flared. At first he looked angry, then the expression faded, loosing steam.

"I ah…. Uh… dunno, actually." Cid admitted, ears turning crimson. Nicholas smiled.

"Then what's to worry about?"

"I still don't want Vincent to think--!" Cid cried, looking sincerely concerned now.

"Why not? He's your friend. He wouldn't hold it against you." Cid flushed further.

"I… shit…I…" Cid raised a gloved hand to his face, rubbing his eyes. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He admits finally. "Still, I dun know for myself yet, so I guess it doesn't matter." Nicholas remained quiet, sensing that Cid was overcoming his own distress, and wasn't about to reinstate it. Cid seemed to drift away in thought for a moment.

"Well," Cid began finally, "You got anything huggable here for my pal Vin?"

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AN: yes, Vinnie does need a teddy bear. ... One that's about oh.... 5'8", with biiiiigg sky blue eyes, and blonde hair, and a pair of flight goggles and a scarf. hehe :) In fact... I'd rather like one of those myself...hehehee.....

REVIEW PEOPLE! (and yeah, I'm noticing the typoes now, but I'll fix 'em all later, lol )