Emmett- chapter 7

"If Bella asks, I'm at the library" Edward and jasper came an joined me Gerber and Matt at a table in the bar.

"Yeah and if Alice asks, I'm at the gym." Jasper said

They came round and sat with us.

"Drinks on me lads!" Gerber called getting up from the table and going to order for us.

"So that's married life?" I asked

"Fucking kidding? I have to make shit up all the time just to get her off my ass..." Jasper huffed.

"Yeah me too. I can't even take a dump because Bella's so fucking clingy now." Edward grumbled.

"You men need to grow a pair you know that. They're woman!" Matt stated, party pooper.

"I bet you get a mouthful of shit too, how'd you cope over the years?" Edward asked

"With great difficulty. You know the amount of crap I get about periods all the time." Matt cracked.

"Don't even get me started on periods. Bella drives me nuts about it! All this complaining about she can't do stuff because her stomach hurts and shit. I said you haven't lost a fucking arm you can still do stuff"

"Yeah well Vanessa is on her period 24/7 from what I hear. No sex in like forever." Matt groaned.

"Tell me about it. You should hear Bella- I can't I'm tired. I can't I have my period. I can't it's too late. It's all bull gentlemen."

"Oh trust me, over the years the excuses become stranger and stranger." Matt said

"Brilliant. I can't even deal with it now." Edward chuckled.

"Here we are guys! Beer to start us off... Lets get drinking." Gerber cheered joining us back at the table.

"Oh no... I can't drink this I'm Jewish." Matt said.

Fuck that shit! I knew this night was going to be ruined.

"Oh hay, I know the owner of this pub, he's a big time Jew." Gerber saved it.

"He is?"

"Oh yeah big time... Its cosier so you can drink it." He lied.

We all grabbed our glasses and got drinking.

We talked and drank. And talked and drank much more until Gerber opened up a very interesting conversation with us all.

"You know never before have I been so thankful I got married. Guys complain about not getting laid- get married and you don't have to worry about it again."

"You don't have sex all the time!" I said.

"Er yeah I do... Whenever where ever and every which way"

"Damn I miss my wife.." Matt grumbled.

"You know there are thousands of hot girls everywhere, looking for a guy like you." Gerber said to Matt.

I shook my head at Gerber trying to signal him to stop the conversation.

"Like me?" Matt slurred.

"Oh yeah everywhere! Rich, Canadian Jew, 60 is the new 30, your balls still work right?"

"Well Erm yeah..."

"You know what lets get out of here... Hot chicks live is just around the corner and I think it would be such a waste if we didn't go! We are going to put some boobs in your face!" He said standing up.

"Hot chicks live? What like a club."

"Not just a club my friend, there will be thousands of sexy ass woman- wanting to ride you up!"

All of us were way to drunk to say no... It wouldn't hurt going out drinking some more.

Rosalie's point of view.

"Coffee?" I asked mum.

"Oh sure why not. Where are they? They left at 6:30 and it's 11:45 now!"

"Serious? I'll try phoning Emmett again..." I clicked the kettle on and took the phone off the kitchen side dialling Emmett's mobile again.

"Hay you reached the voice mail of emme.." I hung up and sighed.

"Any luck?" Mum asked.

"Nothing. Should I be worried?"

"You tell me honey."

"He's not usually like this for the record..."

"I'm sure he's not"

"He's just been so off recently... He's got a match on Tuesday maybe he's just nervous or something."

"Oh yeah probably. Guys deal with things differently to us. Just talk to him?"

"I try but then it turns into an argument about how I always complain and stuff,

I'd rather leave it until he speaks first.."

"You can't keep living like that Rosalie honey, imagine what it will be like when you have a baby... "

"Chaos." I sighed.

"Exactly, you know me and your father had difficulties when we were first together..."

"Emmett doesn't think there are any problems"

"Neither did Matt, but I said if he didn't clean up his act, I would leave him for good."

"It worked? Isn't that a bit harsh to Emmett though.. He is going through so much, wouldn't this make it worse for him?"

"He became a completely different man Rosalie. It's never a wrong time to tell Emmett your not happy with the relationship."

"No I am happy... Most of the time."

"Most of the time? And you're having a baby? And your getting married? Most of the time isn't good enough honey."

"I know... I just..."

The door slammed open as Emmett and Matt stumbled in laughing.

"You are the best son-in law ever!" Matt slurred giggling.

"And you are the best father-in law ever!" Emmett also slurred laughing.

"Where the hell have you been?" I yelled walking out the kitchen and pushing them into the living room.

"We went to the only place where woman really appreciate a man like me!" Matt slurred.

"Matt lea hale you better not be drunk!" Vanessa screamed coming in to join us.

I grabbed Emmett pushing him out if the living room and up against the wall outside.

"I cannot believe you! Emmett that's my dad..."

"He's fine. We had a great time."

"Tell me you did not take him to hot chicks live!"

"I didn't take him to hot chicks live! Hot chicks live ways to cheep for Gerber."

"Oh so Gerber went with you? Brilliant Emmett."

"Yeah he did, and some of the other guys too."

"How did you get home without the cops pulling you over?"

"Gerber's wife dropped us home. And she's great! And they're having sex all the time. Nice Spanish sex whenever he wants."

I sighed walking off back into the living room listening to Vanessa and Matt arguing.

"What do you have to say for yourself Matt?" She shouted.

He burped straight into her face as Emmett snickered behind me.

"You know I drank shots by the dozen off of hot sex ass woman who finally learnt that my balls mean something to them" he choked.

"They don't want your balls Matt, they want your money." Vanessa yelled.

"I think not... When we were at the strip club thing I had women jumping on me like there was no tomorrow and I loved it!"

"You said you didn't take him to strip club!" I said turning around to face Emmett.

"No I said I didn't take him to hot chicks live!" He slurred.

"Where the hell did you take him?"

"Big Babes bar" he whispered.

"And if Emmett hadn't said it was time to go.. I would have slept with even more of them!" Matt shouted.

"And time for bed!" I yelled grabbing him and pulling him out the room and pushing him upstairs.

My mum went and slept in the other guest room away from my dad and I headed up to my room. Emmett followed but I soon stopped him.

"Huh?"

"You're sleeping on the couch!"

"Jesus rose it's my house! I said I was sorry... I was doing you a favour!"

"By taking my dad out and getting him to suck drinks off naked woman! Yeah emmett thanks for that you ass" I ran up into our room and he followed.

"Maybe you should stop focussing on your parents and start focussing on us!"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"For starters you can't seem to find the time to have sex with your own fiancé!"

"I don't have the energy or time anymore Emmett!"

"We'll your not doing anything now.." He said wrapping his arms roughly around me leaning down to kiss me.

"If you think I'm going to sleep with you tonight, you're even more drunk than I thought!" I screamed pushing him out the room and locking the door.


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