a/n: I know the previous chapter was late, but i uploaded it on time! swear to god! but then the spacing got all effed up! i was sooo angry, but then today (11/10) it was ok, so i published…. anyways. hoope your enjoying! Also sorry this is kind of short, I needed a good cliff hanger spot! I looove me those cliff hangers! also, so apparently, every other day the damn formatting is screwed up, and that not even my saracstic comments. this is real life. i tried posting and its all squished, but yesterday it was fine. wtf. hopefully it will be better tomorrow!
"JJ," I whispered, gingerly sitting down next to her in the extra chair near JJ's desk. She had avoided me, and everyone else since we had left the unsubs house, and returned the kids to their families.
She looked at me, but said nothing.
"Are you ok?" I asked, moving closer to her, and taking her hand.
"Fine," was what I got, plus a small nod. I sighed.
"You know, Hotch and Rossi were talking about how great you did on this case…and how you've really been doing an outstanding job since you've been back," I said with a small smile.
She gave a half hearted smile.
"We all have them, Jen," I said softly, after a moment.
"Have what?" She asked me quietly.
"Those days. Those days when the cases are unbearable. The cases that affect you more than usual. It happens," I said. She didn't respond, almost like she was waiting for me to explain more. And since she didn't stop me, I continued.
"I know that today, this case, it was one of those days for you. It probably was for Hotch, and it was for me," I said.
"It…It could have been Henry…or Jack… or Declan," She whispered, eyes wide with fear.
"But it wasn't. We stopped the bastard before he got that chance," I told her."How come you never seem affected?" JJ whispered.
"Aw, Jayje, I do. I am. All the time. You know what Garcia says: When you stop being affected by things, you lose parts of yourself. My fault…is not showing that I'm affected. It's nothing impressive or strong, it's a huge fault. I seem less compassionate….and I don't show it because…it hurts more when it's out there in the open. But when it's out there, people can help you through it. And when you feel hurt like that, the people are the ones that are gonna help you get through it," I said, hoping I was getting through to her, "I'll help you get through," I whispered, my voice trembling.
"Oh Emily," JJ said to me, her voice quivering, on the verge of tears, "I need my baby back," She said as tears began to flow. She fell into my arms, and I held her, whispering soothing words into her ears, kissing her forehead.
"We'll get him back, honey, I promise we will," I whispered. I kissed her softly, "Everything will be ok," I said.
"Declan will come home tonight right?" JJ said, with a smile, as she stopped crying.
"Yeah…" I said, using the sleeve of my sweater to wipe her tears, "And tomorrow we're going to talk to Will and the judge, and we're gonna get custody of Henry," I said fiercely.
She kissed my cheek, "Thank you," She said, "How'd I get so lucky, to have someone as amazing as you?" She asked me. I smiled.
"I don't know…good question," I teased. She laughed. She stood, and I did, too. I wrapped my arm around her and we started to walk.
"C'mon, let's get going. I want to meet Declan," JJ said with a grin.
"I can't wait," I said with a smile. We walked into the elevator, and the door shut.
I unlocked the door to my apartment and walked in. I smiled at what I saw when I entered. There was a man sitting on the couch with a young boy, watching TV.
"Adam Brody," I said with a smile, seeing the young man with dark brown buzzed hair. He was tall and muscular. He was one of my best friends, from a long time ago.
"Emily!" He exclaimed standing up, "Come on, buddy!" He said excitedly. The man shut the TV off as the young boy walked towards JJ and me. He had long bouncy blonde hair, his cobalt eyes glimmering and a huge smile.
"Declan," I whispered.
"Emily," He said with a grin. I nodded. He ran to me, and wrapped his arms around my waist in a huge hug.
"Declan, honey, this is JJ," I introduced JJ.
"Hi there," JJ said with a smile.
"Hi," Declan said shyly, but he was not nervous. JJ was so good with kids.
"Oh god, I've missed you so much," I said giving him a hug again.
"It's been a really long time," Declan said with a shrug.
"7 years," I counted.
"Yep! I'm 10 now," He said proudly.
"Alright buddy. I'm gonna head out," Adam said interrupting.
"Ok, Adam!" Declan exclaimed hugging my friend tightly.
"Be good," He said, kissing Declan on the top of his head.
"I will," He promise.
"Bye, Em," Adam said softly to me with a grin. He hugged me.
"Bye Adam," I said in the hug. He waved to JJ, "Nice meeting you," He said waving to JJ.
"You too," She said with a small smile and he left.
"Want some dinner, Declan?" I asked with a smile.
"Sure!" He exclaimed.
"Pizza?" JJ suggested. That was our go to take out.
"Yes! Cheese please!" He exclaimed, before JJ could ask what kind.
"Ok, I'll go order, Em," She told me. I nodded with a smile.
"Hey, Emily?" Declan asked me sweetly when JJ was gone.
"Yeah, hun?" I asked.
"Can we sit down? I wanna ask you a couple things," He said suddenly getting serious.
"Of course," I said nodding. I took his hand and led him to the couch.
"What do you want to talk about?" I asked him with a smile.
"A few things. First off: JJ…is are you and she…?" His voice trailed away, almost as if he didn't know how to fraise the question.
"Yes," I said with a chuckle, "JJ's my girlfriend," I told him.
"Ok," He said with a shrug.
"You ok with that?" I asked with a smile.
"Yeah! She seems nice," he said with another shrug.
"Good," I said with a smile, "She is."
"She's pretty, too," He said with a grin.
"I agree," I said smiling. I heard JJ chuckling from the kitchen. She had begun to put away the dishes that were in the dishwasher. She probably wanted to give us time for this private conversation.
"And, uh, I don't know if you still do the whole story time thing," I began.
"Sometimes," He said with a shrug.
"Well, JJ is a terrific story teller," I said. There was a playful sparkle in Declan's eyes.
"Maybe we'll have to check that out soon," He said with a laugh.
"Maybe," I said smiling, "So what else did you want to ask me?" I asked.
"Two more things…" He said quietly, "First…you're not gonna…uhm, you're not gonna leave me again…right? I know I was little…but I remember it all," He whispered.
"Oh…" My heart broke a little bit, "No, honey, I will never leave you again," I promised. I wrapped him up in a hug. For a few minutes, we just sat there. He held on to me, like I was his lifeline, but what he didn't know was that he was partly mine. I kissed his forehead, "I will not leave," I said firmly. This was a promise to him, a promise to JJ, a promise to the rest of my team, and a promise to my self.
"Ok," He said nodding.
"What was the last thing?" I asked.
"I want you to tell me something," He said.
"About?" I asked.
He took a deep breath and then said, "My father."
"Your…your father?" I asked repeating the question, making sure I had understood him.
"Yes. I want to know…about everything that happened. And why it happened," He said. At that moment, everything had stopped: JJ had stopped putting away the dishes, the smiles had stopped, the calmness had stopped, my breathing had stopped, and possibly my heart too. What could I possibly tell him? I hadn't even told JJ everything. At this point, I was definitely sure my heart had stopped.
