Note: Hey guys, I wanted to clear some things up: first of all I am sure you have all noticed that this story does not follow cannon after 4x08. I have not included Rainer or any of that shit because it's just not where I want this story to go. However, I have decided that I will make Hale's death, and the way that he died, a part of this story. This is simply because there are a lot of consequences and implications that come along with his death that, as a writer, I really would like to explore in the context of my story. So, I know it's hard and that our hearts are broken but I promise to try and handle this in the best way possible and give Kenzi the support and love that she deserves. Thank you for reading, you guys are amazing, and, as always, feedback is greatly appreciated! :)

Tamsin never saw it coming; thousands of years she spent walking hand in hand with death and she knew the sound of his footsteps like she knew the beat of her won heart and yet this time she didn't hear a single sound.

She wasn't a killer anymore, but after five minutes of listening to Kenzi sob Tamsin was out the door and tracking Massimo down like a mad dog; never in her life had she killed out of spite, never had she been so blinded by rage that she felt the need to use her own hands to beat the life out of someone. She felt so utterly human in that moment, kneeling on top of Massimo, the twig that made him immortal tossed just out of his reach, beating him like she was a bully on the playground, and she didn't care that he couldn't fight back; she didn't give a fuck. Tamsin didn't stop until he was literally within an inch of death, until he begged her for mercy, until his tears mixed with the blood on his face, and he promised never to go near Kenzi again. Only then did Tamsin stand up, take the twig and walk away. She didn't care if he died there, she hoped he would. She wiped her tears away with her bloody hands.

Later, she doesn't even flinch as she washes the blood away.

Everything changes; at first it's slow, then it's all consuming. Kenzi doesn't eat, she doesn't shower, or come out of her room, she stops crying after the first day and the silence is so haunting Tamsin wishes she would start again. More than anything, Kenzi refuses to speak to Bo.

A week later, on the day of the funeral, Tamsin carries Kenzi to the bathroom, she asks her if it's all right before she begins to remove her clothes, but Kenzi is like a zombie and she barely nods her head yes. When Tamsin removes her shirt Kenzi flinches noticeably and Tamsin looks down to see a large purple bruise covering her stomach, "Kenz..did Mass-did he do this to you?"

Kenzi pulls her arms across her stomach, as though she is hugging herself and she starts to squeeze. Tamsin stands frozen for a second, not really understanding what she is doing, but then Kenzi starts to squeeze herself tighter and tears start to form in her eyes and her breathing comes in short, painful puffs, and suddenly Tamsin understands; she's trying to hurt herself.

Tamsin grabs Kenzi's arms and tries to pull them away from her stomach to relieve the pressure on the bruise but Kenzi isn't budging, "Kenzi stop," Tamsin's voice shakes as tears of her own begin to surface, "Kenzi please, don't do that." She wrestles with her, amazed at how strong Kenzi still is even after days of not eating and being so small in general. "Kenzi it wasn't your fault," Tamsin releases her grip on Kenzi's arms and moves them to cradle her face, she turns her head so that she is looking her in the eye, "it wasn't your fault."

Kenzi finally looks right at Tamsin, lets go of her hold on her stomach and collapses into Tamsin's arms, sobbing for all that she's worth. Tamsin holds her as tightly as she can, but for the life of her she can't keep herself from crying too. She's scared because she doesn't recognize this girl that's in her arms, and she doesn't think she can save her; she needs Bo.

Tamsin eventually gets Kenzi into the bath and cleans her up, being careful not to touch Kenzi's bruise. She makes a mental note to talk to Lauren about the bruising, just in case it's something serious.

When Kenzi is clean and getting dressed, Tamsin goes down into the kitchen to make her something to eat. Bo is sitting on the couch, staring blankly in front of her. She's wearing a gorgeous black dress and her hair is down, resting lightly on her shoulders; she looks stunning, but Tamsin doesn't say anything because the circumstances for which she is dressed up are far too grim to allow for any compliments.

Bo looks up when she hears Tamsin walking towards her, "How's Kenzi?

Broken Tamsin thinks, "She's okay, she took a bath and she's getting dressed. I was going to make her something to eat but…"

"She likes lucky charms, but only the marshmallows…when she's sick she eats those even though I tell her not to because it's just all sugar but you know, they make her feel better."

Tamsin smiles a bit, "Yeah, I can do that." She walks into the kitchen and gets a bowl down but Bo calls her back.

"Tamsin, I need to ask you something."

Tamsin walks back to the couch and sits down next to Bo, "Yeah of course, anything."

Bo's eyes are cast down at her feet, staring intently at the toes of her black heels, "Wasn't it hard, being a Valkyrie, and being surrounded by death every day, and knowing that you were the cause of some of it?"

Tamsin looks away from Bo, "It was always just a job for me, it was never…I never really felt responsible for any of it because it was just something I had to do to survive, it was all that I knew." She looks down at her hands, thinks for a second about the way it felt to pound the life out of Massimo, and realizes that the pleasure that gave her was scarier than all of her jobs combined. But she can't tell Bo this. "It wasn't really the being surrounded by death that bothered me so much."

"What was it then?" Bo asks.

"Humanity," Tamsin says, turning her head to look at Bo again, and to her surprise the succubus is staring right back at her and her eyes curious, "I was a monster, my only purpose in life was to deliver souls, I didn't have another choice but humans, they have a choice. They have a choice and they choose to start wars, to lock away those that believe in different things, to suffocate them in gas chambers, they choose to be monsters, and they call it progress; they call it fighting for change, for freedom, for the ultimate society, and for the betterment of mankind. Yet they still preach about being inherently good. The only person that ever made me believe that was true is Kenzi." Tamsin hadn't realized she was crying until now, "She deserved better than this, so much better."

Bo takes Tamsin's hand, then leans over and places a lingering kiss on her cheek. Tamsin closes her eyes and leans into it, "I was right about you," Bo says, "you are one of the good ones."