Disclaimer: Neither YGO nor Driver's Ed is mine. I deny it. For all eternity.

You know the drill. //…// is Yami to Yugi, /…/ is Yugi to Yami, … is Bakura to Ryou, and … is Ryou to Bakura.

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Chapter 7: Turn, Turn, Turn Around

A few days had passed. Everyone was getting the hang of enduring Driver's Ed monotony. Yugi and Ryou had actually already had their second behind-the-wheel lesson. (It wasn't too bad. Yugi didn't run over anything that time.) Today was Joey and Tristan's turn, but not before the torments of simulator and classroom softened them up for the real lesson.

~ Enter The Simulator

Joey and Tristan strapped themselves to the "washing machine" with the frayed seatbelt. They adjusted their alien antennas. And they prepared to enter the forbidding world of The Simulator.

(Dun dun dun dun….)

It was a perfectly planned out attack. They parked their cars. They flashed their headlights. They successfully warned other motor vehicles that they were about to turn. They turned their heads. They executed the Three Point Turn. They stopped correctly.

They hit the gas.

A lot.

(Well duh, what do you expect?)

"Psst! Tristan! How fast are you goin'?" Joey leaned over from "car" number 4.

Car number five replied. "80. You?"

"Dude, I'm at 90."

Their scores for that particular day? Well…they passed. Barely. But, a B- is enough to get a waiver…

~ Enter the Classroom

Joey and Tristan sauntered into the classroom, where Yugi and Ryou were waiting. Make that staring. (Have they ever seen those two guys saunter? Nope.)

"What's with you guys?" Ryou inquired.

"Got up to 90." Joey beamed.

"But Joey, you're not supposed to do that! You're only supposed to go at the speed limit!" Yugi, the cautious one.

"Awww, who cares? We passed. A 60, no less."

"A 60? That's as low as you can go!"

"Okay, class. Here are your test results for the test you took last week."

Mr. Kieling passed out the little Scantron sheets where they had filled in the answers. Mr. Riven fumbled around with the computer.

Yugi, of course, got a perfect score. Ryou did pretty well, a 90. Tristan also did well, a 90 too.

But Joey? Heh-heh…he squeaked out a 73.

"Seventy-three?!?"

Yugi looked at the little grading scale in the front of the room. "That's a C-. You'd better do better on the next test."

"Eehhhh, whatever. This is Driver's Ed. Who cares?" Joey shoved it into his textbook.

In the background, some girl was whining about some question. "I want my truck point!"

Yugi, Ryou, Joey, and Tristan all sweatdropped. Truck point?

"You gave that point to her! I want my point too!"

Yugi glanced at Joey. "Apparently she cares about her grade."

The current lesson that Mr. Riven and Mr. Kieling were trying to get across was more IPDE junk. Another video was shoved into the VCR. Automatically, everyone went into video-mode -- that is, Ryou into okay-I'm-watching-this-like-a-good-British-boy, Tristan into detached dreamy mode, Yugi into I'm-watching-and-half-learning-and-laughing-inwardly-at-the-pathetic-attempt-of-the-video, and Joey into sleep mode.

The video: a very bad computer animation one. It was so bad that there wasn't even a person driving the car. The car on the screen was driving itself. Very freaky, in a way.

The video replayed the same scene over and over and over, repeating how the IPDE process could have prevented this really pathetic car crash.

Then there was a scene where the car was driving behind a truck, sped up, and hit the truck. Then the screen read, "WHAT WENT WRONG?"

Well obviously, the car wasn't looking where he was going. Yugi responded inwardly. The truck was right in front of the…driver for the love of Ra.

//Yugi, it is the concept that counts.//

/Yami, that was a really lame example to teach the concept./

Yami smiled. //Well, perhaps it must be simplistic for those that cannot understand.//

/Even a kindergartner can get that!/

//Human denial is very powerful, Yugi. Some people can deny the most obvious things.//

/Hmmmm…like Kaiba, for example?/

//Exactly.//

The video thankfully came to an end. Yugi and Ryou waved to Joey and Tristan, who stayed behind. They had the, ahem, "great privilege" to have a behind-the-wheel lesson with none other but Mr. Riven.

Gag.

~ Enter the Car

Tristan took the first drive. This lesson was to teach about more turning, backing straight, backing around a corner, and a three-point turn.

Tristan was cool. He rode with style. That is, seat waaaaaaayyyy back, radio blasting, arm out the window, and an expression that he believed was cool. Along with practicing driving, he was practicing being cool for the time when he could drive Serenity around.

"Okay now Tristan! Back around the corner!" Mr. Riven actually did not mind the seat slouching nor the radio blasting. In fact, he was rocking along with the music. Joey was at first slightly disturbed at seeing this other side of Mr. Riven, but he got used to it.

Tristan stopped the car. Turning his head ever so slightly (so as to practice looking cool when he drove Serenity around) he peeked out the back window and saw Joey making funky faces.

"Joey! Knock it off!"

Joey, being Joey, did not. Tristan rolled his eyes and did the maneuver with Joey looking like a monkey.

After a few more drives, it was Joey's turn.

Heh-heh. Joey's second drive. There's just something about Joey and cars that just doesn't work out well together.

Well, the moment Joey got behind the wheel, it seemed like every single street in Dominio suddenly decided to do remodeling or construction.

Yep. Road blocks, trucks in the way, cement, construction workers, you name it, and Joey had to deal with it.

In his own way, of course.

"OUTTA MY WAY! STUDENT DRIVER COMIN' THROUGH!"

"Joey, that is not how you are supposed to drive. You are supposed to be calm."

"Calm. Right. AAAAAHHHH!" The car swerved. A large construction bucket had fallen over and had rolled into the street.

"Sorry!" A worker trotted over and picked up the bucket. The car was now diagonally across the road, and everyone was looking out the window at the offending bucket being taken away.

Joey had just gotten the car straight again and was cautiously moving past the construction truck when everyone in the car hear a loud "thunk."

The brakes squealed. "What'd I hit?"

Tristan craned his neck around. "Nothing. Another bucket just fell over."

"Stupid construction workers…" Joey muttered.

Once they were out of the way, Mr. Riven said, "Okay, let's do a three-point turn."

"Right."

Jerk. Turn. Hear tires scrape against asphalt. Lurch to the left. Feeling of falling to the left. Lurch. More turning.

"There. That's the first turn."

Everyone was a little woozy.

Mr. Riven finally spoke. "Great. Now for the second turn."

Joey looked back. "Nothin' to it."

Tristan muttered, "I hope."

Turn wheel. Lurch. Move backwards. Jerk to stop, as wheel was turned the wrong way. Turn wheel the other way, hear more tire scraping. Back up. Lurch. Move. More turning. Stop.

"Okay. Now what?" Joey asked.

"Uh, now you do the last turn. Turn to the left again."

"Right."

Turn wheel. Lurch forward as gas pedal is hit way too hard. Jerk to stop and thank the inventor of seat belts. Move again.

Tristan muttered in the back seat, clutching the car door handle. "I've heard of the three point turn. This must be the thirty point turn."

The car finally righted itself. "No sweat. I got it."

For a few, thankful moments, Joey at the wheel was safe. Until Mr. Riven said, "Okay, let's back around a corner."

BACKING around a corner? They were going to be seriously sick.

They stopped in front of an unsuspecting, secluded street.

"Okay, look at the back window and back up straight until the end of the car goes past the corner."

"Right."

Back, back, back up. Joey thought that backing up straight would be fairly simple. It's just going straight, right?

Wrong.

The car made big fat Ss moving along the curve. Joey just couldn't get the hang of backing the car around. What was left was right and vice versa. Or something like that; Joey wasn't quite sure.

Well, eventually they made it to the corner, albeit at a wrong angle. Instead of a nice, 90 degree turn, it was more like a 75 degree turn.

But hey, life goes on.

"Okay, now just turn the wheel all the way and then turn." Mr. Riven instructed.

"Uh, which way?"

"Well, which way do you want the back end of the car to go?"

"That way." Joey pointed to the left while he was turned around looking out the back window.

"So, you turn the wheel in the same direction that you want the back end to go to."

"So I turn the wheel to the left." Joey began turning the wheel to the left – the opposite way that he pointed.

"No, no, no. You turn the wheel in the same direction."

Joey stopped turning the wheel. "I am. I want the back end to go left, so I'm turnin' the wheel left."

"No, you don't turn it that way. You want the wheel to turn this way." Mr. Riven began pulling the wheel to the right.

"But that's right! I want it to go left!"

"You want it to go in the same direction."

"Yeah! Left!"

Mr. Riven rubbed his head. He always had to have one or two people completely confused while backing up. "Look, just forget left and right. It's the same direction that counts."

"What?"

"Okay, you want the back end to go that way, right?" Mr. Riven pointed to the left while turned around.

"Yeah. Left."

"Forget left. So turn the wheel in the same direction that you want the back end to go towards."

"That's left!"

"No it isn't!"

"I don't get it."

Mr. Riven grabbed the wheel. "Okay, turn around." Joey turned around. "The back end should go that way." Mr. Riven pointed to the left. "So the wheel must turn in that same direction." He turned the wheel in the same direction, all right, but he turned it to the right if Joey were facing the wheel, and left if Joey were facing the back end of the car. Joey could kind of feel what Mr. Riven was doing.

"Get it?"

Joey shook his head. What was left was really right and now he was totally confused what was even left now in the first place. "Nope."

Mr. Riven shrugged. "Oh well. Just turn."

Joey kept the wheel in the position Mr. Riven put it in, and carefully stepped on the gas, remembering the last time he had stomped on it. Slowly the car inched its way around the corner.

"Um, Joey? You can stop turning now."

"What?"

"You're going to drive into these nice people's green lawn if you don't."

"Oh." Joey stopped. "Now what?"

"Well. You have to get the car straight again."

There was yet another long, tiring lesson in How To Back Up Properly Without Creating Serious Lawn Jobs. Unfortunately, this lesson was not fully applied before Joey backed into yet another lawn. Eventually, Mr. Riven gave up (for once) and they headed back to school.

Mr. Riven scribbled something onto the little blue cards. "Okay, that's it. Don't forget to practice!" Mr. Riven attempted to smile, although heat and a very exhausting lesson made the smile more like a grimace. Then he headed back into the school where the Great and Heavenly AC was working at full blast.

Joey grabbed his little card and read, "STR2, ACC1, BR4, BCK3, PT1. Need more practice!!!"

"What the heck does that mean?" Joey scratched his head.

Tristan was reading off his little card and looking at a white sheet of paper. "Hmmm, More practice, Uses one hand? What? What's wrong with that?"

Joey craned his head. "What'd you looking at?"

Tristan waved the white piece of paper. "It's the sheet that translates what all of these abbreviations mean."

"Gimme that!"

"Hey!"

Joey read (or translated) his little card. "Steers abruptly, not smoothly? What?!? I did fine! I accelerate too hard? And I have to brake smoother? And I zig zag while backing? And I need more practice?"

"Well, after watching you almost knock over the mail box, I'd say you do need more practice."

"Hey!"

"Did you practice at all since the last lesson?"

"Uh, no…not that I needed to…"

"You ran over lawns about five times!"

"And what about you? You almost hit a light post!"

"No I didn't!"

The two bickered back and forth as two males will when comparing anything. But both of them couldn't quite deny that they both needed more practice…

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LoneWolf16: *shrugs* Huh, at least this chapter was a bit better, I think, than the last one. Got Joey and Tristan behind the wheel.

Kaiba and Marik will most likely feature in the next chapter or the one after that. Not quite sure, I don't exact plan out my fics. I have a vague idea, and I'm just trying to link them together.

Oh yeah, just as a note to all those out there who kinda like this fic (but don't review and tell me *grumbles*) for the next and future chapters I'm changing the genre of this fic to humor/drama. It's a weird combo but whatever; I'm weird too.

So anyway, till next update!