CHAPTER 7

SANTANA

I walk as fast as I can away from Brittany. My clothes are wet, and I don't know what to do. Should I dry them off first, change into something dry or get out of here? I don't know what to do.

Brittany kissed me and I kissed back. I'm supposed to get angry but I'm not. I even like it, actually. Oh God, what have I gotten myself into? Mother Superior, what would I do? What should I do? I touch my heart and it's still beating so fast as if I run a mile. What is happening to me? I'm not my brother! I'm a girl! So, why am I feeling like this?

I shake my head. This isn't happening! Mother Superior will kill me. She will definitely kill me. I shouldn't kiss anyone, and a girl, for pete's sake!

I shouldn't!

I couldn't!

I touch my lips and I shiver. Her lips were so soft. The feeling was super nice. And then I felt her tongue brushed my lips and I panicked. Something burn inside me, a foreign feeling, I'm not used to this feelings, reactions, or whatever this is. I can't!

"San! Where are you going?"

I turn around to see Quinn behind me.

"Uhm… A-about to g-go home?" I stutter.

"With wet clothes on? Come here." she said, raising her eyebrow. "I'll dry you up."

"Okay." I said, nodding my head. Atleast Quinn is here, she can calm me down.

We went straight to the dressing room, "Here. Wear this." she said as she begins to unbutton my long sleeves polo.

I panicked. Quinn is undressing me! "Stop." I said, my voice raises a bit as I hold her hands.

Quinn looks at me innocently.

"I'll do it." I told her while looking intently at her, "by myself."

Quinn snap out of my gaze, "Oh… okay. I'll wait for you outside." she said hurriedly.

"Whew! That was close!" I breathe as soon as Quinn left the room.


BRITTANY

"What were you thinking? We have a wide pool of our own, why would you swim by yourself here?" Sugar just can't stop assaulting me with questions when she saw me all wet near the pool. "Hey Brittany, are you listening? Why won't you answer my questions?"

I stop walking, without turning back, I manage to answer her questions coldly, "I got myself wet because of your new member. I saved him from drowning."

And then there was silence.

"Pfft. Pathetic right? What kind of a man is he, really?" I said in a bored tone. I can't help it. I need to act like I don't care. Like what happened really didn't happened.

Leaving Sugar behind, I walk towards the dressing room. Quinn is there, looking flustered.

"What are you doing here?" I ask.

Her eyes went wide as she looks at me, "Why are you all wet, too?"

I ignore her. I don't want to explain anymore.

I was about to open the door when Quinn moves in front of me, blocking me.

I raise my eyebrow, "What are you doing? I need to change, Quinn. As you can see, I'm all wet here!"

"Santino is inside. He's changing too. You shouldn't come inside." she said.

I roll my eyes. Right. Santino, Santana, whatever her name is!

Then suddenly, the door opens and Santana step outside. Our eyes locked with each other.

"Uhh…. uhm… Thanks for saving me earlier." she said softly then avoids my eyes.

I just nod my head and step inside the dressing room.

I lean towards the door as soon as it was close. I exhale a deep breath. Oh fuck. I have a shitty life! My heart beats triple fast that I'm beginning to worry I might have an heart attack.

Fuck.

Damn.


SANTANA

"What happened?" Quinn asks me as soon as Brittany closes the door.

"I nearly drowned myself, and Brittany saves me." I said, lowering my head trying to hide the blush creeping in my cheeks.

Sugar appears in front of me and she points directly at my nose. "Are you really a man?" she asks, her voice angry.

I swallow hard. Am I caught?

Quinn tugs me and she steps in front of Sugar. "What kind of question is that?" Quinn's voice matches that of Sugar.

"What kind of a man is he? Letting a girl save him from drowning?" Sugar answers, her eyes catching mine.

"I… I… don't know how to swim." I admitted.

Quinn hugs me, "It's okay, San. No one blame you for anything. Good thing Brittany was there, I would have done the same thing if I was the one present."

Sugar crosses her arms, "I wouldn't." she said. "He should be the one doing the saving job, you know."

"Sugar!" Quinn glares at her.

I walk towards Sugar, I caress her folded arms. "I'm sorry for being not-so-man-enough. I promise I will do my best to protect all of you next time." I said. Sugar looks at me, I gave her my genuine smile.

She moves away from me, like I have some kind of infectious disease.

I furrow my eyebrows at Sugar. Does she hates me now?

I walk towards her. "Are you still angry at me?" I ask.

"N-No." she stutters. "I'm not."

"Okay." I said, my eyes sad. I think nobody likes me here.

I turn around just to come face to face with Brittany.

"Uh… uh… Hi." I greet.

Awkward.

My eyes linger on her thin lips. Kissable… thin… lips… Oh! What am I thinking?!

"Uh… yeah." she said then turn around, practically running away from me.

I let out an exasperated sigh.

Quinn walks at my side and grab my shoulders, she whispers into my ear as we walk, "Don't worry about them. I'm here, I will take care of you."

I smile widely at Quinn. "Thanks Quinn."

She pinches my cheeks. "You're welcome."

With Quinn's close proximity with me, my heartbeat remains the same.

Maybe I was just nervous in front of Brittany. Sometimes, she really scares me. That can only be the reason, right?


BRITTANY

I was pacing back and forth thinking of ways on how could I avoid Santana. It's easier said than done because I just can't get her out of my head. She occupies like half of my brain, nope maybe 3/4? Or the whole part? Fuck. I'm really doomed.

No! I can't act like this in front of her, I mean, I could just go back ignoring her. I could do that.

That's what I'll do.

I open the door and there she is, the object of my mind, Santana. My eyes went wide.

Her eyes went wide too. I can say she was about to knock on my bedroom door when I opened it.

My eyebrows furrow, "What are you doing here?" I ask in an icy tone, and cross my arms in the process as I lean against the door frame.

Santana is fidgeting her nails. I can tell that she's nervous too.

Awkward. I know.

"Can we talk?" she asks softly.

"What do you want to talk about?" I replied.

"Hmmm… You know… the… uhmmm… you know…" she said as she lowers her gaze.

"Fine. Talk." I said, I should just get this over with. "Come in."

I can sense that she is hesitant to come inside with me. I roll my eyes.

After a while, she steps inside. She face me but maintaining distance between us.

She clears her throat, she is nervous, I am positively sure. "What happened yesterday, I mean, why did it happened?"

I avoid her eyes, taking time to answer her question. Why did I kiss her yesterday? I honestly don't know. I exhale a deep breath, "I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have done that. It was a mistake. I honestly don't know why I did that actually.

I look at her, and there is sadness in her eyes. What the fuck should I tell her? She is a nun! Worst than being an ordinary straight girl!

She nods her head. "Guess I should go." she said then walk towards the door.

I want to ask the question that had been rattling my brain ever since yesterday. "Why did you kissed me back?"

She stop on her tracks. "Does it matter?" she asks.

"Of course, it does." I said, our eyes meet.

"You are my first kiss. It's new to me. And to be honest, I like it." she said that made me feel butterflies inside my stomach. "But you're right. It was a mistake. You're a girl, I'm a girl. I'm not… you know…"

I cut her off. "You're not a lesbian like me. You can't even say the word." I scoffed.

She shakes her head, "It's not like that. It's just that, you're making me confused. And I'm not allowed to be confuse anymore, I will become a nun in a few months and I need to get you off my mind and…" she rambles that I can't control myself as I wrap her in my arms.

"Shhh… Shhh… I'm sorry for putting you in a situation like this." I whisper as I caress her hair. Her hair smells nice. I shake my head, I have to stop myself, it will just bring trouble for Santana.

I pull her away from me and force her to look deeply into my eyes, "Should I stay away from you, from now on?"

She shakes her head immediately, "No. I don't want you to."

I furrow my eyebrows, "It will just make you confuse even more?"

"I don't want you to stay away from me." she said softly, then avoids my eyes.

I lift her chin up so she could face me. "San, I think it's not a good idea."

Her eyes linger on my lips and I have to fight the urge to not kiss her. So, help me God.

"We could be friends?" she suggests as she lift her eyes on me.

I smile at that. I admit defeat. I can't stay away from her. "Friends."

"No kissing friends. Just friends." she said, smiling adorably.

"Right. No kissing." I replied, but then she stare at my lips again. I smirk. "But you have to stop staring at my lips from now on."

She moves away from me, that I already miss touching her. I frown.

"I'm not staring at your lips." she denies that I have to laugh at that.

"Okay." I said, smiling.

"You don't believe me." she said, frowning.

"I believe you." I said, still smiling.

She glares at me. I reach out to her and ruffle her hair and we both headed towards the door.

I have to protect my heart from her.

But I can't stay away from her now.


SANTANA

1 2 3 sway

1 2 3 sway

I smile as I follow the dance steps. I can feel that I'm already improving. Not as good as Brittany, Quinn and Sugar but at least I can follow steps now.

"That's nice Santino! You're getting better!" the choreographer said and I smile at him.

"Thanks." I said, grinning.

Then Quinn came near me and offers to wipes the sweat off my forehead.

"You were amazing, San." she said as she wipes the sweat off me. Quinn is really sweet. She always takes care of me.

Sugar appears in front of me and offers me a bottled water. "Here." she said. "You're improving a lot, by the way."

I flash a toothy grin at her. "Thanks Sugar." I said. Sugar is also sweet even if she is acting weird sometimes.

I look around for Brittany though, I hope I didn't disappoint her with my performance today.

But to my dismay, she's not here. Maybe she left already.

"Where is Brittany?" I ask, trying to sound nonchalant.

"I think she went to the restroom." Sugar answers.

Good. I thought she left already.


Brittany and I became close ever since we had that talk. I admit sometimes she was still distant but I think she's just like that. Quinn and Sugar say so.

We are about to leave the dancing studio when Sue enters the room.

"Good afternoon my lovely A N JELL! I have an announcement to make." Sue said, her voice raises.

We gather in front of her.

"Where is Brittany?" Sue asks.

"I'm here. Why?" Brittany answers. She just enter the room and looks at me, flashes me a smile that made my heart flutter.

"Good. I want you to meet Ms. Rachel Berry." Sue said, then at her back enters a petite brunette.

"Hi. It's nice to finally meet you." Rachel said, giving all of us a smile.

"Rachel is the broadway diva everyone talks about. She just signed a contract with us and I want the A N JELL to join her in her debut album. One song would be nice. Or maybe two." Sue said, looking at Brittany.

Brittany remains silent.

"Sure." Quinn answers, offering Rachel her hand. "Welcome to Sylvester Records, Rachel."

Sugar joins in too, "So you are the broadway diva? You have a nice voice, by the way. I'm Sugar." then they shake each other hand.

Rachel smiles, "Thanks. I'm really looking forward to work with you all." she said.

I walk closer too, "I'm Santino. Nice to meet you." I said.

Rachel took my hand and gave me a smile. Then her eyes fly towards Brittany. She walk towards her and offers her hand. "Hi Brittany. I'm really honored to work with you." she said.

Brittany furrow her eyebrows, then she looks at me.

I look away. I don't know. I felt something deep within me. Seeing Rachel like that, talking to Brittany made me feel… I don't know.

Sue snickers. She whispers to us, "Rachel likes Brittany. The reason she chose our company than others was because of Brittany. She have this huge crush on her."

I felt a kick on my chest when I heard that from Sue. Rachel likes Brittany?

I look at them again. Rachel seems invested on her conversation with Brittany.

And then I felt it.

Jealous.

I am jealous.


BRITTANY

"What?! You want me to team up with Berry romantically? Are you out of your mind Sue?" I said, slamming my fist on the table.

Sue called my attention earlier so she could talk to me privately in her office but this didn't cross my mind.

"Brittany, you have to understand. She needs publicity. And you're the right girl for that." Sue said, matching my tone.

"I don't need publicity! So, count me out!" I said, combing my hair with my fingers. "This is insane!"

"Calm down, Brittany. It's all an act. Listen to me, as much as you don't want publicity, believe me, you need this."

"Why?" I ask.

"One reporter asked me if you and Santino are dating." Sue said that made my eyes wide.

"What?!"

"I don't believe it, of course. You, of all people, aren't interested in men, so I assumed that they misunderstood your gestures with each other. The reporter told me that you and Santino were both cuddly with each other in every interviews and shows you attended lately." Sue explains that made me frown.

"We weren't cuddly with each other! I have to admit, Santino and I get along with each other now but it's because we are A N JELL, for god's sake! Are they crazy or what? Long before, they started rumors about me and Santino fighting, now this?" I said, almost screaming.

"Brittany, you have the most number of lesbian fans. It will ruin your career if rumors of you and Santino dating hit the entertainment news."

"But we aren't!" I said, slamming the table once again. Well, I wish we are but sadly, we are not dating.

"That is why we are trying to fix things. It won't just ruin yours, it will ruin Santino's career too. You see, his fans are also increasing in number so I want him to become single and available for all the girls out there, and well, for the other gender too." Sue shrugs. "You understand my point, Pierce?" she said, authoritatively.

I don't want to ruin Santana's career. She has personal reasons; reasons involving her mother, and I just can't ruin her career. Or her twin brother's career.

"Okay. What do you want me to do?" I answer defeatedly.


SANTANA

"Hey Britt. Come join us. We just finished the first movie, we are going to start the next." I greet as Brittany enters the house. It's been a week since that awkward meeting with Rachel Berry. According to Will, Rachel is busy recording her other songs but by next week, we are gonna participate.

In truth, I don't want to see Rachel Berry again. I don't want her getting near with Brittany.

Brittany looks tired and I want to ask where she went.

"Where did you go, by the way?" Quinn asks.

Brittany looks at me with tired eyes. "I'm really tired." she said, not answering Quinn's question.

I stand up and walk towards her. "Why?" I ask again.

She stares at me and tells Sugar to stop the movie. Then she walk towards the TV and press the remote.

I furrow my eyebrows at her action.

And then she increases the volume of the TV and my eyes flew there.

"BRITTANY S. PIERCE WAS SPOTTED HAVING A DATE WITH BROADWAY DIVA, RACHEL BERRY.

THE TWO ARE RUMORED TO HAVE A SECRET RELATIONSHIP.

BUT NOW, SEEMS LIKE IT'S NOT A SECRET ANYMORE"

Then pictures of Brittany and Rachel holding hands, eating together, and even kissing each other flashes on the screen.

My eyes are wide open as I watch. I felt it, the ache in my heart.

I look at Brittany and she is staring at me.

I narrow my eyes at her.

"You're dating Rachel Berry?" Sugar exclaims, clapping her hands. "Why did you not tell us?"

"I'm happy for you, Britt. It's time for you to have a girlfriend." Quinn said and hugs Brittany.

I stood frozen.

Sugar and Quinn congratulated her and I struggle to fight the tears that are starting to form.

My phone rings, save by the bell, "I need to answer this." I said then I left.