Title: These Lives We Lead
Author: omfg_yaoi_squee / ello luv / Mimi
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters/Pairings: eventual Jack/Ianto, mention of one-sided Gwen/Jack, Gwen/Rhys, one-sided Tosh/Owen (perhaps more in later chapters), John Hart/OFC, past Ianto/Lisa, the Doctor (Ten)
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Jack Harkness is the most popular boy in year 13 – if not the entire school. When a new boy is transferred there, things start to get a little more complicated…
A/N: Thanks to my LJ betas
eriinxx, aranellaurelote, and butterflycell. Thank you also to my artist draw_yourworld. You'll be seeing stuff from her later ^__^
A/N2: We finally learn what happened in Cardiff. Hold on to your socks, it's nothing like you would expect.
Chapter 6 – The Ballad of Ianto JonesThe rapport that father and son had built up over the past weeks was shattered, both parties hoping that it was not beyond repair. Sunday passed in tense silence and both were more than glad when Monday morning finally rolled around. They breakfasted in silence and Ianto left without a word, though, to his credit, he resisted the temptation to slam the door.
Ianto managed to make it halfway through the school day before Jack confronted him.
'Ianto,' the American said gently, gripping his arm, 'We need to talk.'
'Not now,' Ianto pleaded, 'Later.'
Jack sighed, eyes locking with Ianto's, piercing.
'I promise,' Ianto found himself saying. Jack nodded and Ianto hurried off to lunch.
He wished that Jack would forget, but that wasn't the case. The American caught up with him after school had let out. Ianto reluctantly followed Jack to an empty classroom.
'How'd it go with your dad?'
'Grounded for two weeks,' Ianto replied ruefully.
Jack cringed. 'Sorry.'
'S'alright,' Ianto said with a shrug, 'It wasn't your fault.'
The look on Jack's face showed that the American thought otherwise. They stood in silence for a few moments, neither uncomfortable nor companionable.
'Look, Ianto,' Jack burst out, 'about what happened at the party—'
'Forget about it,' Ianto cut him off, 'We were drunk so forget about it'
'Right,' Jack said, voice tinged with disappointment, 'I'll take the Retcon.'
'Take the what?'
'Retcon,' Jack repeated, 'It's a Torchwood thing. We say it when we want to imply forgetting something.'
'Ah,' Ianto said in understanding, 'Well then, if there's nothing else?'
As Ianto was turning to go, Jack's voice stopped him.
'Ianto,' Jack said, 'Wait. I'm sorry, but I can't just forget. I've kissed many people, guys and girls alike, but when I kissed you, I felt—'
'Please don't,' Ianto whispered.
'You felt it too!' Jack pressed, 'I know you did.'
'I can't, Jack.'
'But, why?'
'I just can't, alright?' Ianto snapped.
'No, it's not alright!' Jack protested, 'Give me a real reason, Ianto! I can't let this go, let you just walk away over a "just can't"!'
Ianto let out a sigh, dropping down into one of the vacant chairs, arms pulled tight across his stomach in a protective gesture. Jack watched and waited, could see the gears turning in Ianto's mind, contemplating.
'Okay,' the Welsh boy conceded softly, 'I'll tell you. But you have to promise not to tell anyone, even John. I don't want everyone to know.'
'Of course,' Jack said softly, sitting beside him, 'I promise.'
'There was this girl,' Ianto began softly, 'a girl named Lisa. She was beautiful, Jack - an absolute jewel. She moved to our school in Year Eight and we began to date over the winter holidays in Year Nine. My first girlfriend, believe it or not. One day, we were fooling around a bit behind an abandoned warehouse. We were just having fun, being stupid kids, yeah? I got carried away; hormones and all that. Stuck my hand up Lisa's skirt.'
Ianto paused, taking a few deep breaths, composing himself. Jack waited patiently.
'Her real name was Liam. Ever since he had been very young, Liam always felt out of place in his own body. When his family moved to Cardiff, Liam used the chance to remake himself, to become someone else. And so, Liam became Lisa. I was shocked when I found out, of course. Imagine finding out that the girl of your dreams was actually a guy! I knew that I still loved him,' Ianto chuckled, 'Her. She'll always be Lisa to me.'
Ianto gave a small sniffle.
'Things were great for a while,' he continued, 'I, of course, kept Lisa's true identity secret. We lived in a fairly prejudiced part of town, you see, and she already got enough shit for being black, for dating a "good upstanding white boy",' Ianto snorted, 'Revealing her true self could be potentially deadly. We covered our tracks so well - I don't understand how, even today - but our classmates found out. It was horror, Jack, you have no idea. Lisa's family had obviously always known, but mine hadn't. My mam was surprisingly okay with it; my step-dad, not so much. He shunned me, kicked me out despite my mam's protests. My step-sister Rhiannon and her husband Johnny were sympathetic, so I moved in with them for a while. The things we had to endure,' he whispered brokenly.
Ianto paused; tears leaking form the corners of his blue eyes, making salty, wet trails down his cheeks.
'Three months after everyone discovered our secret, they found Lisa in one of the alleyways, her clothes in tatters and a knife in her chest. Whoever did it wiped their fingerprints from the hilt, but then again,' Ianto laughed mirthlessly, ignoring the tears on his cheeks 'nobody really looked that hard to find who had killed the little black tranny. I stayed with Rhi for a little bit, but managed to convince her and my mam to send me here to live with my dad. I miss Lisa every day, Jack. I—'
Ianto broke off into huge, racking sobs, his body shuddering. Jack gathered the other boy's slighter frame into his arms, squeezing for all he was worth. They sat like this for some time, Jack whispering sweet soothing words into Ianto's ear. Eventually, the tears subsided and Ianto removed his face from Jack's chest, though his arms remained wrapped around the American.
'I'm sorry,' the Welsh boy whispered brokenly.
'There's no need to be,' Jack murmured back.
Ianto disentangled himself from Jack's arms and moved to the other side of the room, still sniffling, with his arms tight across his chest.
'Ianto, hear me out. Please.'
Ianto looked over at Jack through red-rimmed eyes.
'I'm not asking you to forget Lisa,' the American said gently, approaching Ianto, 'I could never ask you to do such a thing. But think about what she'd want you to do. Would she want you to give up on love and mourn for the rest of your life? No. The most important thing is to move on. I loved a girl once. Her name was Estelle. When her family moved to Australia, I was devastated. I know it's not the same thing, but you have to believe me that it's best to move on.'
Jack sighed softly and wiped an errant tear from Ianto's cheek. 'I'm not asking you to give me your heart, Ianto. I guess what I'm trying to say is just give me a chance.'
There was a moment of silence, of contemplation, but, finally, Ianto nodded, his eyes downcast. Jack smiled lightly, a hand rising to lift Ianto's chin, catching blue eyes with his own.
'Tell you what,' he said, 'as soon as you're not grounded anymore, I'll take you out on a proper date. After that, you can decide what you want to do. Alright?
'Alright.'
