Chapter 7 – It's gonna be okay
This chapter gave me the most trouble. First of all the events in chapter 8 were supposed to be the second part of this chapter, and I needed a filler. Then as I started writing the filler, again thanks to Prae's ideas (your ideas are gold, lady) and I was thinking of the conversation that Steve and Danny had to have, something happened that extremely pissed me off.
The power went off just as I was finishing the chapter, and Word didn't save the whole document. So, basically this cute and fluffy scene I was this close of finishing was gone. I blew a fuse, started cursing and I couldn't even look at the chapter.
But, then the next day I got an idea for chapter 8, and as I started writing it, I came with an idea to how to continue this chapter and I went with it. Then as I was discussing a particular scene of chapter 8 with Lunedd she gave me an idea for the end of chapter 7, and I liked it. So, I took the idea, and I made it to fit the chapter, so, thanks babe for the suggestion
The next few hours passed in a haze of fear for Danny.
First, the paramedics had to physically force him to let go of Steve so they could check him over. When they stabilized Steve, they noticed the blood on Danny's shirt, but he dismissed them, saying it was Steve's blood. That he is fine, and all they have to do is to concentrate on Steve, because he can't lose him, not now. Danny had to tell him he didn't mean to push him away, that it wasn't intentional, and that it was all a show for Melissa.
He felt dizzy when he tried to get up and one of the paramedics helped him out as they wheeled Steve inside the bus. Danny followed just seconds later, and he could feel himself shaking, but his only focus for now was Steve, keeping one of Steve's hands in his.
When they arrived at the hospital, Danny was made to stay in the waiting room, while the staff checked Steve over. His head was reeling, he was shivering, but he forced himself to sit down, and ride it out, before he got himself signed in a room, too, 'cause he knew, he was close to following Steve there.
Danny fished out his phone, and with bloody fingers he fumbled over his contact list, calling Kono. He all but broke down as he told her where he was and what happened.
Chin, Kono and Lou arrived at the hospital in record time. They all saw how shattered Danny looked, and how small his frame was in the plastic chair. His hands were covered in blood, and there was blood on his shirt, but they all knew it wasn't his, since Danny didn't have any visible injuries on him.
He greeted them with tired and bloodshot eyes, trying not to break as he relayed the whole thing with Melissa.
The team was trying to convince Danny to go and clean himself before Steve saw him like that, but Danny refused. He knew he wouldn't budge from Steve's side. No one could make him move. Chin promised that he'll come by later to drop off some clothes.
Danny gathered himself enough to order all three of them to go and help HPD in the search of Melissa. He also gave an order for Jerry to try and track her through the traffic cams and her online activities. Danny was Steve's second-in-command after all and he had to take control over the situation.
Lou was the one to ask which places Melissa frequented most or if Danny knew some of her friends for possible places where she may be hiding. Danny stared at Lou for a second before a realization dawned on him. He only knew the apartment where Melissa lived, and her boss that Danny met before informing him they were going to take a time off. Other than that, he didn't know much of the people that crossed her path.
What kind of a boyfriend was he? He didn't even know his girlfriend anymore. He didn't know where she went, who she hung out with. Maybe he didn't know her as well as he thought he did. And the proof of that was lying in the ER, fighting for his life, because of him.
Because that vase was aimed to hurt him. Danny sighed and gave a straight answer of what little he knew. He hoped it was enough for them to find her.
…
Minutes after the rest of the team left to carry on Danny's orders, the doctor treating Steve emerged from behind closed doors and approached Danny.
"Detective Danny Williams?"
"Yes?"
"I understand you are listed as Lt. Commander McGarrett's emergency contact."
"I am."
"My name is Dr. Parcel."
"How's Steve, Doc?"
"Let's take a seat I'll explain everything to you."
Danny sat himself in his previous position, the doctor sitting next to him.
"Commander McGarrett has a concussion, which I'm sure you already know."
"Yeah… We are kinda used to concussions in our line of work. I recognized the signs."
"Right. So, I examined him thoroughly. There is nothing life altering, don't worry. It's a mild concussion, on the border of turning severe if the Commander doesn't follow instructions."
"So, you say it could worsen?"
"What I'm saying is that he will need a lot of rest, not doing anything that will require physical exertion."
"Sounds like we have to put him in shackles."
The doctor furrowed a brow.
"Steve, Doc, he… He's an adrenaline junkie. Danger is his middle name."
"Well, it's for his own wellbeing. If he treasures his health, he'll do as I say. He needs to have someone by his side as he rides off the side effects of the concussion."
"He'll have someone with him at all times." I'll be there.
"He'll be okay, Detective. With the extent of his actual injury that required 10 stitches, I'm not sure how his condition is not worse. He is lucky. And good he had you around when it happened." The doctor smiled. Danny just nodded still caught up in what the doctor just said. "I'll keep him overnight so I can monitor his progress. If there is no change, he'll be able to go home by noon."
"Thank you Doctor."
"He'd be transferred in a room in about 20 minutes. Should be waking up any time after that."
Danny sagged furthermore in the chair, worry etched on his face. Somehow the doctor's words offered more ground for fear instead of comfort.
Steve was going to be okay, Danny had to repeat that to himself. But there was still this fear for the things making a turn for the worse.
Danny sighed. He wouldn't be calm until he saw Steve with his own eyes.
…
Three hours later found Danny sitting in another plastic chair on Steve's right side, staring at the still unconscious form of his partner. They stitched the head wound and gave him pain medication that was supposed to help with the headache.
Danny was eating himself up on the inside for doing what he did. For saying what he said. For being an ass towards his best friend, his partner. But, he had to protect him. Because, if Melissa did something even worse than this damn head wound, then Danny would have never been able to forgive himself.
Steve didn't see it that way, tho. He only saw the man Danny wanted to see, and he realized as he released a loud sigh, Danny hurt him even more trying to protect him. One of the dilemmas he always had in life, why did people hurt those that they were supposed to protect?
Danny kept one of his hands right over Steve's on the bed, trying to keep alive that thread of reassurance that everything's gonna be okay.
There was a faint sound of rustling coming from Steve's direction, and Danny immediately focused his attention to the man in the bed.
"Hey, you goof…"
"D'nny…"
Steve's eyes were reduced to slits, but were open. Danny felt a relief wash over him when he saw Steve awake. A smile crept up his face, and Steve furrowed a brow. And immediately regretted it, because as he came to himself he realized he had one hell of a headache.
"Thank God you are awake. You have no idea how happy I am that you made it, you idiot."
Steve wondered what Danny was doing next to his bed. Last he remembered Danny was pushing him away, both physically and with words, practically growling at Steve to get out of his house. He still couldn't figure out why Danny was suddenly so mad at him, why he was bitter and angry, and a man Steve did not know until the moment he showed himself.
"Steve… Babe, you are okay." It was more of a statement, than a question. "Melissa hit you on the head pretty hard, you required stitches. It was bleeding profusely, but they managed to stop it. You have a concussion tho, so take it easy, okay? No sudden movements that will make you dizzy. If you feel nauseous you just tell me."
Danny was talking like was on a roll, and Steve was even more confused. Danny was angry with him, then why the hell did Danny sound worried for him? And was Danny crying?
"Danny…"
"Don't scare me like this ever again, you hear me? You passed out on me, and I was worried sick. I thought you died on me. And it wasn't pretty."
Steve's eyes were more open now, but he closed them tightly shut, the light over the head of the bed bothering him. As if sensing Steve's discomfort Danny got up and dimmed the lights, then resumed his position in the chair.
Steve opened his eyes again, and stared at Danny for the first time after the fight happened. There was fear, anger, love, compassion, and something unidentifiable that gnawed at Steve's gut. Danny smiled at him through a veil of tears, and Steve smiled back, although it didn't reach his eyes. He wanted so much to wipe those tears off Danny's face. They didn't belong there.
Danny's heart dropped as he saw the look in Steve's eyes. The same look he had back in the house. He knew what it was.
Danny closed his eyes, fighting a new surge of tears, because he had to talk with Steve and explain everything to him.
"Steve… Um, I don't know how to say this, but…"
"You don't have to say anything, Danny. You said enough back there."
"But, it's not what you think. Let me explain, babe, please."
Steve heard a desperation in Danny's voice. Danny was all but desperate.
"There was a reason why I was being an asshole to you in front of Melissa."
"I'd very much like to hear that reason." Steve's tone was a little bit bitter, and Danny bit his lower lip, because he was guilty for his partner behaving like that, trying to keep cold.
"She said something about us… Before you came. She said that you and I are more than friends, and that we are in a relationship. She actually called you my fuck buddy." Danny laughed bitterly as he wiped at a stray tear. "She was alluding that you and me were sleeping together behind her back, that I let you control my life, and she said so mean things about you, Steve…"
"Danny, I'm sorry."
"What are you sorry for?"
"For making her think like that. I never thought that she'd see it that way."
"Listen to me, Steve. It's her head that's fucked up, nothing you say or do will change that. Her own twisted sense of what's right. You have nothing to apologize for. In fact I'm the one who should apologize and ask for forgiveness from you." It looks like it's a routine between the two of us these days, Danny thought, but didn't say it out loud.
Danny paused as he observed Steve from where he sat on the chair. He removed his hand when Steve stirred, because he didn't want to upset Steve, but Steve was reaching for the comfort that hand brought him, and Danny allowed Steve's weak grip to ground him while he continued with the rest of the story.
"You know, I had some time to think before you woke up, and lots of things start to make sense now."
"What exactly?"
"Well, first the fact that I didn't even know who I was dating. Lou asked me some things about her earlier. I then realized I didn't know her at all… And the fact that you were right about her and her state of mind, and you weren't even present when she ran over her ex…" Danny took a shaky breath and ran his hand in his hair out of habit.
"Danno…"
"No, Steve. This is my fault. I brought her into our lives, I made her part of yours, as much as mine, because you see we are in a relationship and I just want to cover for myself in front of the public."
Steve snorted. "Don't make me laugh, Danny. My head hurts like a bitch."
"Sorry. Anyway, when she said what she said, and then some more I don't even want to recall, she had this hate in her eyes. I could see it. It was directed towards you. I was afraid she'd hurt you. Or say something to you, and then make you do something you'll regret. I knew in that moment I had to protect you from her."
"So, all you said and you did, was to protect me?"
"Yes. I couldn't allow her to do something to you. Because in that case, I couldn't even forgive myself. It's enough of a torture to know she was displaying that hate for you openly, I didn't want to see how far she'd go in actually harming you. I'm sorry, Steve."
"I understand you, Danny. Perfectly. I'd do the same if I was in your place."
"I know you would. So, you see now, why I was acting out of myself. It was never my intention to hurt you. It's just, I thought if I could find a way of keeping her as far away from you as possible… I'd do the same thing again in a heartbeat if it means you are not in the direct line of fire, so to speak."
"Thank you, Danny."
"I understand if you are mad at me for screwing up our friendship with my little stunt there, but…"
"Stop, stop right there. Screwing our friendship? Is that what you thought you did? Danny, let me tell you something, and don't you ever dare doubt yourself or our friendship again. Never. Was I hurt by your words? Yes, I was. Was I hurt by your actions? Hell yeah. But, I never for one second doubted our friendship. Because I'd do everything for you."
And as much as you think that I'm the shoot first, ask questions later type of a person, I know to listen to reason before to jump into conclusions. Something I learned from you, buddy.
"I'd do everything for you, too."
"I know that. But, I want you to remember, that I would not let anything happen to you, no matter how mad or angry I am at you. Which is not said to cause any more grounds of you making me mad, or angry in future. Once is enough." Steve's voice was teasing, but firm, aimed to prove to Danny he meant all he said.
The rest was communicated via his eyes. Steve knew Danny would understand.
"I understand." Danny smiled a tired smile, knowing he and Steve were good again, and that he'd do the same again. No doubting friendships in the future.
Danny yawned, loudly, and that made Steve cackle and then hiss when his headache acted up.
"Careful there, you may be a Super SEAL, but we don't want you to hurt yourself on my account."
"I didn't hurt myself. It's just funny how you yawned… Like a hippo."
Danny broke into a hysterical laugh. "Okay, touché, partner."
"You need to rest Danny. You didn't get much sleep last night."
"You are the one who needs the rest, babe, I'm fine."
"You are dead on your feet. C'mon." Danny felt a tiny tug at his hand and then a pull.
"What are you doing, Steve?"
"C'mere." Steve patted the empty spot on the bed.
Danny looked up with tired eyes to see that Steve has moved on the left, and there was space between him and the bed rail. Just when did he have time to do that?
"Your stealth skills are scary, you know that?"
"Not the first time you said that. It proved to be useful in our line of work. Now, c'mere."
"No. You are fucking kidding me. Steve don't do this, you need to rest comfortably, and do not play shit with these things!"
"I'm not playing shit with anything. C'mere Danno, sleep with me."
Okay, that was definitely awkward. Considering their earlier conversation. And Danny was looking like Steve slapped him. Speaking of, he had an angry red bruise on his left cheek.
"Shit, that came out wrong. I mean sleep with me, next to me, just rest and…"
"You are lucky you are on meds, McGarrett." Danny growled half-heartedly as he allowed Steve to pull him upwards and tug him closer.
Danny toed off his shoes and dropped like a heavy weight on the bed. He didn't mind the metal of the rail digging in his back. He was grateful that Steve was okay, and could finally allow himself to sleep, and relax.
"It's okay. We are okay, Danno."
That reassurance was all that Danny needed to
As he drifted off to sleep, Danny realized that Steve was the most important person in his life next to his daughter. Something he knew all along, but didn't realize it up until now.
…
Steve stayed up for a little while after Danny fell asleep. It was tugging at his brain how tortured and what a load of baggage both of them had, and how Danny helped him to heal scars Steve even didn't know existed inside him.
Danny was like the light of his life, the one person that never lied to him, never left him. He did hurt him earlier today, but he did it, because he wanted to protect him. Danny would never hurt him deliberately. And Danny had a calming effect on him.
Steve smiled to himself at how hard he had to fight to break the walls Danny had initially around him when they first met. It was how he knew Danny was a very special person that deserved to be treated well and showed not everything was black and white and to be loved, first and foremost.
His thoughts were interrupted as he felt Danny kicking and pawing at him as he tried to adjust in the bed. Danny obviously thought he was in his bed in his own house. The way he was spreading his body and pushing at him found Steve squished even further to the end of the bed. Steve felt very uncomfortable with the change of scenery, but didn't have it in his heart to wake up the blonde that was happily snuggled against him and looked adorable the way he was spread out.
Steve knew in that moment that if it wasn't for the rail to stop him, his butt would have kissed the floor beneath him. And it was his idea after all to get Danny to sleep a little. Boy, he surely miscalculated Danny's abilities to be seemingly everywhere at the same time. But, he secretly enjoyed having Danny so close to him. It was peaceful. Calming. Soothing.
Steve smiled as Danny tried once again to adjust, but calmed his movements when Steve snuggled Danny closer to him and effectively trapped the detective between his two octopus tentacles.
Maybe Steve wasn't the only that experienced the calming effects being close to Danny. Maybe, just maybe it was the other way around.
…
