Thank you for the reviews and follows! Keep them up! Follow me on Tumblr ezrajclarke
"I'm sorry, what're we doing?"
Beca couldn't remember how she started fighting with Chloe. It probably started when they got to the campsite and not only was she practically forbid from being Spider-Girl for the weekend, but Aubrey took her laptop and all of their phones. Or maybe it started in the hours they spent putting up the two tents, one of which had a branch destroy it right after.
"We're rediscovering our sound," Chloe sighed out in frustration, her arms folded over her tank top. Beca wondered how long she had been holding it in. Had she been so self-involved that she hardly noticed how stressed Chloe was too? How long had it been that they were on two different sides of the same coin - kissing in an alley and distant in the same house?
Maybe, she started fighting with Chloe the second she had to share a sleeping space with every single one of the Bellas. Yes, they were close, but that was a new level of closeness and Beca Mitchell had trouble with change. Or maybe it was when Chloe told her that this was bonding and a chance to get to know everything about each other which caused Beca to put her walls up to protect Spider-Girl. Maybe it's because Chloe refused to listen to her when she made it blatantly obvious that she wanted to go home.
"Are we? 'Cause it seems like we're just singing songs that we would never out in our set." Beca regretted the words as soon as she saw Chloe's reaction to them. The way her jaw dropped open, her posture at odds with Beca. She never wanted to see Chloe look at her that way. She wanted to cherish Chloe.
Or maybe, just Maybe they started fighting when Chloe had turned to her and told her that she would always regret not doing enough "experimenting" in college. What did that even mean? Experimenting with girls? Experimenting with Beca? Beca didn't want to experiment she wanted a relationship.
"Beca c'mon-"
"No, none of us know how to beat Das Sound Machine, but I know it's not going to be by doing this." All eyes were on Beca now and she could feel the heat rising to her cheeks. The sunlight beat down on her neck like the pressure of the situation.
"It's an exercise in finding harmony, Beca, Sometimes you have to break stuff down before you can build it up-" Aubrey started at her.
Maybe it was because this retreat took away everything she was stressed out working on and needed to finish.
"I have more important things to do!" She practically screamed it and despite how upset she was, It felt good to finally just scream.
There was a pause, then, "What could be more important than this?" Chloe's eyebrows furrowed at the brunette and Beca's heart rate sped. She wanted to be honest. She wanted to say Saving lives! Being Spider-Girl!
Beca took a deep breath, "Nothing, forget it-" She was making a scene and the last thing she needed was to explode like this. Although, she couldn't help knowing that this had been coming for a long time. Beca had never been able to handle stress well and now, taking it out on Chloe she wondered why she ever thought she could do an internship, school, the Bellas, and be Spider-Girl.
"You think we haven't noticed that you've been a little checked out lately?" Chloe wasn't letting this go and Beca wasn't sure what excuse to give. Did she lie again? Here and now, I'm front of all of the Bellas? The lies were building up under the surface and it made Beca's skin itch.
"Come on Beca, just tell her-" Beca couldn't help the death stare she gave Amy. Tell her what? That I'm Spider-Girl? She scoffed at the very thought. Here and now in front of all of the Bellas. Amy didn't know the half of it. Hell, Chloe didn't know the half of it Chloe had no idea that the girl she had kissed a week ago was Beca and Beca was beginning to hate it.
"I heard that. Tell me what?" Chloe asked it and she was mad. Furious, even. Beca could see it in her eyes. The way the cerulean in them could also burn like fire reminded Beca why she even liked Chloe in the first place. This wasn't a fight out of nowhere. Between the two of them, it was stress over what they were both passionate for.
"You misunderstood me…" Amy stumbled through an excuse with made up words and Beca closed her eyes, "Listen, I don't want you guys to fight. You're Beca and Chloe, together your bloe and everyone loves a good bloe… so," The breeze hit Beca's face and she couldn't help but wonder if she would have enjoyed this trip without all of the stress she had. The lake was beautiful, the camp was gorgeous, and the activities they did would've been fun if she wasn't worried about everything else. She just wished she could've spent this weekend with Chloe the right way. And maybe they would've bonded too. She swallowed. This is the last way she wanted to tell Chloe anything. This was most definitely not the right time.
"Okay." She breathed out, "I've been interning at a legit music producer wants to hear my work. God forbid I have something going on outside this group."
Chloe bit her lip and took a minute. Beca's stomach flipped under the anticipation, "Okay, so why would you keep something like that from us?" The genuine hurt in Chloe's voice wouldn't register with Beca until later that night.
"'Cause you're obsessed! You all are! We're graduating and the only person thinking about life after the Bellas is me!" She was just screaming because everything around her was starting to become white noise.
"What's so wrong with being focused on the Bellas? This has been my family for seven years!" Now Bellas moved to sit on the picnic table nearby, all eyes on their co-captains. Beca was starting to question whether she and Chloe were such great team leaders after all. How did Beca not see this brimming at the surface?
"Only cause you're too scared to leave! Sack up, dude!" Beca hated the feeling of tension between her and Chloe, but getting having everything on the table was important. She could hear the Bellas whispering about what she said. Everything just felt like one line cross after another.
"Oh great. So you've been lying to us all year and now is when you choose to flake out?! The Worlds are-"
"Oh my god." She screamed, "Enough about the Worlds! I am out of here."
She could hear Chloe yelling to her from behind, "Oh, what? So you're just going to leave now?" It was anger fueled by pain that neither girl knew how to communicate verbally
"We all have to eventually Chloe, might as well be now! And if you all know what's good for you, you'll follow m-" It would've been a good line to end on if she hadn't walked into a bear trap and had to beg Chloe to help get her down. And hey, even if it was the most unconventional way possible, they did find a way to bond and after probably the longest day of her life, it helped. Chloe was right. She was taking her frustrations with everything she put on herself out on the rest of the girls. And now that it was out in the air, she could lean on them for it.
Nightfall came fast after the girls helped her down and they started setting up for a campfire. It was a beautiful night under the stars and Beca couldn't help but feel like there wasn't any place else she'd rather be. Even with all of the stress, she had people to lean on and she often forgot that she could do that. It helped that everything was out in the air. It helped that Chloe knew about her internship and after all was said and done, Chloe congratulated her on it. The very thought of Chloe being happy for her made her proud of the whole thing. As the rest of the girls were getting ready for the fire, Aubrey took Beca inside to grab some ice to ease some of the bruising after the fall.
When Beca walked into the cabin, she was thankful that one small piece of the campsite had air conditioning. Aubrey walked her to the back of the cabin to an office that seemed to be hers. The desk at her name tag followed by "camp manager" and three pictures running across it. The first was of Aubrey and her dad, the second of Aubrey and Chloe, and the third of the Bellas from the year Aubrey graduated. Behind the desk was a freezer full of ice. Beca commented on the size of freezer and Aubrey would only tell her that the camp methods were unconventional. The thought only made Beca a little nervous. Aubrey filled handed her the bag of ice, then leaned back on the freezer as Beca picked a bruise to ice down. The cabin brought on a stillness that Beca wasn't used to. The only sound in the room was an analog clock on the far wall.
"You're going to have to tell her, you know," Aubrey watched the Bellas campsite from the window. Jessica and Ashley were piling logs into the fire pit, while Chloe tried to light one of the ones on the bottom. They were laughing and carrying on. A picture of near-perfect harmony, the way Beca always wanted it to be. The thought of that picture changing when she graduated sent a chill down her spine. She didn't want this to change. They were her family.
"What?" Beca tilted her head at the abruptness of the sentence. Aubrey had her back turned to Beca so the brunette had no way of gauging her words into any context. The ice started to chill her skin so she moved it to her other shoulder. This was the first time she had truly thought about the bruises she had gathered. She might have been "clumsy," but the purple cursive bruises across her arms and legs were no joke. They usually healed in a few days and Beca usually stuck to wearing long sleeves, but it was so hot in the camp that she had chosen shorts and a t-shirt, which only highlighted her wounds.
"You're going to have to tell Chloe at some point or another," Aubrey continued to keep her in the dark. The blonde folded her arms and watched Chloe get the fire lit. Chloe celebrated and the rest of the girls congratulated her. Stacie handed out blankets and they began to settle for the night.
"I don't follow," Beca replied, her eyes watching Aubrey's back and the scene of the girls outside the window.
"Beca, she knows she didn't kiss a stranger," Aubrey's voice was lower and Beca tried not to react.
"Aubrey, what are you talking-"
"Your secret is safe with me," Aubrey continued, ignoring Beca's notions, "But one way or another she's going to find out. I would advise you to tell her the truth before she finds out and you both get hurt." If Beca was asked about it later, she would consider it a threat.
If anything, she felt like Spider-Girl was getting hard to keep track of. That was three people in her inner circle, if that meant that Aubrey was in her inner circle. She didn't really seem like she was, but Beca could understand why. She was looking out for Chloe, the way she always had. It had been a few weeks since Chloe's obsession with Spider-Girl started and Beca was quiet about it. Regardless, that was still two more people who knew that didn't last week and Beca wasn't sure how she felt about that. She had to be more careful with this secret. If she kept the streak she had going, the rest Bellas would know before the end of the semester. Aubrey's words would echo in her head for the rest of the night after they rejoined the Bellas around the campfire.
Around that campfire, a lot of things changed. The tension is Beca's shoulders depleted as she apologized to the girls and Chloe would tell her a million times over that she should've just said something. And finally, after all the days of ignoring it, the girls talked about what their plans would be after graduation and how they would continue on with their lives. Overall, Beca was scared, but she knew these girls were her family and when they were all gone from Barden University, that would never change. The look Chloe gave her when she sang her audition song was a look that Beca would not soon get out of her head.
