Chapter 7

"Hey, Kim, watch this," Brian snickered, seeing Paul in the living room tinkering around.

"What are you up to?" she asked.

"Check it out; you'll fucking howl."

"This better not be something stupid or involve the baby or I will cut your balls off and sell them on eBay."

"Trust me, you're going to get a kick out of this. And no, this doesn't involve Danny."

"In that case, knock yourself out," Kim nodded, now having a general idea.

"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" he cried, going into the living room.

"What's your problem?" Paul asked.

"Spider." Brian did his best to keep a straight face.

"DON'T FUCK WITH ME! WHERE IS IT?" Paul yelled.

"It's on the floor now."

"Oh fucking hell! BAD!"

Brian and Kim burst out laughing as Paul jumped on the couch, smacking his head against the wall in the process. The situation was just too funny not to laugh.

Lana came back in through the sliding glass door, carrying Danny, who had managed to slip outside. "What the hell is going on here?"

Brian tried in vain to catch his breath as Kim laughed even harder. "I told Paul there was a spider on the floor…..and he jumped like a hundred feet in the air…landed on the couch and hit his head on the wall!"

"You two really need a new hobby," Lana shook her head, then turned to Paul. "Are you all right?"

"I'll live," he replied, glaring at Brian.

"You were supposed to be watching the baby," she reminded Paul. "He got out again."

"My fault," Brian spoke up. "I forgot to close the sliding door."

"Dumb ass," Kim said, smacking him.

"Well, just be a little more careful next time," Lana nodded. "Fortunately, Danny didn't get too far before I could catch him."

"By the way, there wasn't a spider," Brian added.

"The next time we're on the road, you realize I'm going to slit your throat in your sleep, right?" Paul warned.

"Paul!" Lana cried.

"Serves him right after pulling that little stunt."

"That's a very common threat I get from a Mexican," Brian grinned.

"I'd tell you to go get us all something for dinner, but I'm scared of what you might put in it," Lana said.

"Everyone else's will remain intact. However, I'd put rat poison in Brian's."

"Never mind. Kim and I will go get something, since you can't be trusted. Especially when you thought it would be hilarious to put hot chili powder in her latte."

"I still owe your husband's ass for that one," Kim nodded.

"And I hope his life insurance is paid up because I'm still going to slit your husband's throat after that fucking spider stunt he just pulled," Paul replied.

"You're hopeless," Lana said, shaking her head.

"Besides, it would have been only a daddy longlegs," Kim giggled. "They don't eat much."

"Let's go, Kim," Lana sighed. "Can we trust you two to stay with Danny for about fifteen minutes and not kill each other in the process?"

"Danny will be fine," Paul replied. "Can't guarantee the same about Spanky, though."

"Just make sure the glass door is closed this time," Lana said, rolling her eyes before she and Kim left. "And no more jokes about spiders or anything else."