Saying Good-bye

Karuka was alone when she woke up. She rolled over onto her belly for a nice luxurious stretch. Upon hearing voices she sprung up to her elbows, listening intently. The soothing voice of her boyfriend reached her ears and her daughter's high pitched child voice chimed in with his. A third voice joined in that made her groan. Sai. Dammit! Why the hell won't he go away?

"How long are you planning on staying?" Gaara inquired.

"I'm not sure. Ten Ten has another exhibition of my artwork scheduled to open this Friday. You will come won't you?" Sai asked.

Karuka planted her face in her pillow and screamed. This can't be happening. She quit screaming when she heard them talking again.

"All of these pieces feature your girlfriend. I'm sure you'd be interested in seeing them," Sai remarked slyly.

Karuka could practically see the smug smile on his face because she could hear the arrogance in his voice.

"She's not my girlfriend," Gaara corrected him.

"What?" the other man inquired sounding surprised.

"I asked her to marry me. She said yes. She became my fiancée last night. I'm sure I have you to thank for that," he responded with obvious vindictiveness in his voice.

Ouch! Karuka slapped her hand over her mouth which muffled her giggle into a snort. Gaara was her hero in so many ways. He had saved her from believing that real love did not exist. He rescued her from becoming a lonely, bitter woman who would taint her daughter to hate men and view them as selfish, worthless creatures. Although some men were still definitely self-centered and useful only a purely aesthetic level present company in the kitchen included. Sai was a beautiful man and an astounding artist but perfectly useless except for great sex. A lecherous grin curled her lips. She had to admit he had served his purposed quite well there. He had also given her something she never thought any man could; he gave her a daughter that she loved with all of her heart.

Karuka decided she better get up and get in there before things got really ugly. She stopped by her daughter's room to find her playing quietly with her dolls. She had been hoping the child had not been present for their conversation. The two men were glaring at each other across the counter when she walked into the kitchen. It appeared she had arrived just before the fight broke out.

"Did I miss something?" she inquired, glancing back and forth between the two men.

"Nope. Not a thing," Sai answered, glaring at her when she slid her arms around the redhead in the kitchen wearing nothing but a pair of jeans. He could kick that man's skinny ass all over this town.

"Are you ready to go ring shopping?" Gaara asked her. Neither one of them were sparing Sai's feelings because they were convinced he had none. What man could indifferently turn his back on his child if he had feelings?

"Yes, I'm ready," she answered him, giving him a kiss on the lips. She turned her attention to the man who was watching them from the other side of the counter. "Would you like to spend the day with Aislinn? You'll have to stay at the gallery with Ten Ten of course but I assumed you would be there anyway."

"Sure. Of course," Sai replied distractedly, staring out of the large windows of the loft apartment.

"Aislinn! Are you ready to go?" Karuka asked, walking back toward her daughter's bedroom.

Aislinn was standing in the hall with tears running down her face grasping her teddybear tightly.

"What's wrong, baby?" She knelt down in front of her crying child to wipe away the tears.

"But I want to go with you! I want to be with you and Gaara!" she wailed, huge tears rolling from her eyes.

"Well, sweetie you can go with us. We just thought –"

"You thought wrong, Mommy! I want to be with you and Gaara!"

Damn. Sai was not having a good day.


"What about this one?" Gaara asked, pointing to the plain diamond solitaire.

"No, too plain," Aislinn answered who standing between them tightly grasping each of their hands. "What about that one?"

The couple looked at the complete wedding set that looked trees cut into the gold bands with emeralds for the leaves. The engagement ring was a square shaped emerald on a plain band.

"Can you afford that?" Karuka asked, looking at the other rings.

"Of course I can since you've been selling my glassware. Besides, I'd do anything for you," he replied, smiling as she blushed a dark red.

"It's perfect!" Aislinn shouted with excitement. "I'll have a Mommy and a Daddy. We'll be a real family."

Karuka and Gaara stared at each other over the child's head. Karuka shrugged so Gaara let it go. They were allowing Aislinn to make her own decisions about the man who was her father. Even the child was smart enough to know the difference between a father and a daddy. She was desperate to have a Daddy who would love her and always be there with her. It would be better for her than a sometimes Daddy who breezes through town every few years. Hopefully, Sai would figure it out soon as well.


"You're turning her against me on purpose aren't you?" Sai accused after they showed him and Ten Ten the rings at the gallery telling the story of how Aislinn picked them out. They did not even mention her calling Gaara Daddy.

"Sai, wait!" Karuka yelled when he made a hasty retreat from the gallery. What a wonderful time for him to finally discover emotions. She followed him out back where stood in the tacky garden her and Ten Ten had made just for fun. Mismatched flowers and shrubs along with miscellaneous sculptures and yard signs filled the back yard. Trails were cut among them with paving stones that they had made themselves. They had covered every inch of the yard with something for the sole purpose of not having to mow it.

Sai was staring at the paving stone beneath his feet. It had a crudely drawn picture of the beachside cottage on it. To the side, their names had been written in the cement. Never forget had been written on there as well.

"Did you make this?" he asked, crouching down to trace the letters with his fingers.

"Yes, I did," she answered, staring at his back.

"Never forget what?" he questioned, standing up to face her.

"I don't know. It's stupid," she mumbled, backing away from him.

"Never forget what?" he repeated in a severe manner, grabbing her shoulders to halt her retreat.

"I made that three years ago! I made it just after I had Aislinn. I still had hope you would come back. I had hope that you loved me. I-I," she stuttered, avoiding his eyes.

"You what? Tell me, Karuka!" he demanded, shaking her until her eyes met his.

"I loved you!" she yelled, the tears flowing down her cheeks. "I loved you, okay! I know I shouldn't have but I did."

"Dammit," he muttered, releasing her and turning his back to her. He pressed his hand against his chest. There was that damn ache again. He knew what it was now. It was the same feeling he had felt for the past four years every time her saw her. That same pain had plagued him when he saw his little girl for the first time. It had stabbed him with varying degrees of agony throughout the years as he had watched them from a distance – a distance he should have traversed but never did, allowing time and opportunities to slip past him. At this moment, he recognized it was too late. All of that was gone - she was gone - and it was his fault. He swept past her and went into the gallery.

"NO!" she screamed, when he grabbed canvas of a black and white drawing of her naked and asleep and began destroying it. She ran to him when he seized another one and started ripping it apart. "Stop it! Stop it!"

Karuka froze when he turned into her, dropping to his knees to press his face into her belly. He was emitting this awful sound and her belly felt wet through her shirt. Her hand cupped her chin and pulled his face up to see it.

"Oh, my god," she gasped, gaping at him in disbelief: he was crying. She found this quite disturbing and a little terrifying. She let go of his chin and he immediately pressed his face back into her tummy to continue sobbing with complete abandon. Her fingers found themselves twisting into his hair, then stroking through his smooth thick black hair. She closed her eyes and continued the comforting gesture, allowing him to cry as long as he wanted to. The others must have heard the commotion and disappeared into the back.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, repeating it over and over.

"Sai, stop," she murmured, dropping her hands from his head. She opened her eyes to look down at him. They held each other's gaze for a very long time.

"Karuka," Sai sighed her name, sliding one of his hands under shirt. He pushed up the fabric so he could press his lips to her belly.

"Sai, don't," she begged him when his eyes met hers briefly before pressing another kiss to her sensitive skin above the waist of her skirt. "Please, don't."

"I know you still love me. I know you still want me," he purred sensuously, making eye contact with her again. He was trying to seduce her but what he saw in her eyes made him stop. They were cold and hard and full of anger.

"It's too late," she hissed through her clenched teeth, jerking out of his grip. She turned and walked away, stopping before she disappeared from the room. "Do me a favor would you? Please don't come to see us again. I would prefer you stay out of my daughter's life. She needs a full time Daddy not some stranger that will come through just long enough to interrupt her life then be gone again. Can you do that? Can you disappear completely?"

"Of course I can. If that's what you want, I can make that happen," he promised.

"Yes. It's what I want. For me and my daughter. Good-bye, Sai."


Sai disappeared that very night without a trace just like he had promised. Karuka and Gaara were married a month later. They had two more children two years apart; a girl named Oki and a boy they named Genkei. Both of them were redheads with teal colored eyes like their father's. They raised their children in a happy home above the artisan shop next door to the art gallery. It was only obvious that all three would become artists. Aislinn could sketch and paint just like the man who had helped make her but never was a part of her life. Oki and Genkei favored glassmaking and pottery like their father and mother.

Karuka was walking past the room where her sixteen year old daughter, Aislinn, made her paintings when she peeked in to see what her daughter was working on. She drew in a sigh so loud and sharp it caught her daughter's attention. She smiled when her daughter turned around to look at her.

"Oh, hi, Mama. Want to come get a closer look?" she inquired, waving her mother in.

"Who is this, baby?" she asked, staring at Sai's impeccable likeness on the canvas. She pressed her fingers against her lips, forcing back the tears. How could the child possibly remember him?

"I don't know. I've had his face running around in my head for years. I would swear I have seen him occasionally through the years. You know the kind of thing where you're walking down the street and think you see someone and then their gone?" she questioned, looking at her mother carefully. "Mama, who is he?"

"How should I know?" Karuka shrugged casually, drawing her eyebrows together to feign confusion.

"Mama," Aislinn shot back incredulously, raising a skeptical eyebrow.

Karuka took a deep breath, closing her eyes. "His name is Sai. He is your real father. He's the one who got me pregnant. He was an artist. He was selfish and unreliable and – "

"Mama!" her daughter exclaimed unexpectedly cutting her off. She put her arms around her mother who was crying. "My real Daddy is the redheaded man in the living room. I don't care who the sperm donor was. I love you, Mama. It's okay."

Karuka dried her tears and hugged her daughter. Yes, it was okay. Everything had been okay for quite a while. They had raised wonderful children they loved and who loved them. She loved her husband Gaara with a fierce passion and devotion. Sometimes she still thought about the man who helped make her daughter possible. She was grateful to him for that. She kissed her fingers and pressed them to the lips drawn on the canvas. It was time to say a final farewell.

"Good-bye, Sai and thank you."