So here I am with a new Chapter (Kazu u lil shit! You are so mean to me) But thanks to Kazu you get a new chapter! Well it's kinda sad and I cried a bit while writing... but I hope you like it. Have fun reading :3


Chapter 7

Days passed since the incident. Dan had been released from hospital and was just lying around on the couch. He hadn't seen Alex in the whole time. Maybe she was avoiding him? Or she was just too busy. Dan sighed. It was kind of lonely since Phil was meeting Connie nearly everyday or had something to do. The brown-haired boy got up and decided to film a video. Sighing he set up his equipment and pressed record.

"Hello internet! It's been a long time I know, but I had my reasons for not posting anything. I'm sorry, please don't kill me", he smiled and waved awkwardly at the camera.

"As you can see, my hand is bandaged and well you do not want to see what it looks like. It's horrifying. Phil and I had been fighting more often over the last few months. It really stressed me out and about a week ago we got a new neighbor. Ever since she moved in in the flat beside us, Phil started to act weird. He got uncomfortable around her or he seemed a bit rude. My first thought was that he hates her. I don't know why, but she looks a lot like him. My guess was maybe they are siblings, but Alex and Phil totally disagreed with my suspicion", Dan explained and sighed. He had to tell the Phandom everything. It was pretty hard to re-tell everything that happened.

"After she was at our flat for dinner, it was on the same evening she moved in, Phil and I had another argument. Well... I was careless and something that angered Phil. He shouted at me and then he ran away. Now... don't get me wrong! Phil and I are still friends and he won't move out, of which I'm glad", he trailed off. Dan sighed. Maybe he should be straight-forward with the next passage.

"Later that night, when Phil didn't come back... I started to hate myself. I felt bad for the last months, but at that moment... my whole hate came down on me. I loathed myself for driving Phil out on that day. And I still hate myself for it. But when all these thoughts came crashing down, I was at the point where I couldn't help myself anymore. I needed someone or I was going to break. But since no one was there... I just broke. I smashed the bathroom mirror with my bare hand. And afterward I sat on the ground, crying and my hand was bleeding all over. Some glass shards had dug themselves into my knees. Whilst I was there and wailed like a child, Phil came back..." Dan closed his eyes for a moment. This was the hardest part. Tears started to form in his eyes, but he tried to hold them back. Just the thought of that moment was enough to make him cry. It hurt so deep down in his chest. Phil, his best friend, got depressed, because of him.

"I didn't realize he was there, but when I did he just hugged me. I couldn't help myself and cried onto his shoulder. When I managed to calm down... Phil blamed himself for my condition. He blamed himself for things he couldn't have foreseen. For things that may have been unavoidable...", at this point Dan's voice cracked. Tears ran down his face. He couldn't bare it anymore. The weight of all these feelings pressed down on him. The Danosaurs shouldn't ever see him cry, but in this moment it was unavoidable.

"I feel worse than ever before. Phil is my best friend and I don't want him to feel bad about my twisted personality!", he cried, "It's all my fault. He had to care for me while I was in hospital. He had to bear all of my existential crises! Phil had to bear with my depressions! I loaded everything off on him! And I slowly destroyed him with all of my small problems!" Violent sobs escaped his throat as he cringed. He covered his face with his hands and just broke down in front of the camera.

"Everything was my fault!", he screamed, his voice cracking, "I'm always hurting Phil with my selfish actions! I could never really be there for him!" He sat on the couch, sobs shaking his seemingly fragile form. Dan looked so vulnerable. So hurt. The crying went on for minutes until he finally regained some composure.

"That's everything... that happened in the last days and months", he whispered, "Bye guys... I'm sorry if I ruined your day. But I couldn't let you guys in the dark. Take care." Dan turned off the camera. He decided to leave the video mostly uncut and just uploaded it after some small edits. After that he just laid back down on the couch. Curling up in a ball he laid there.

...

Phil came into the apartment, as he heard Dan filming a video, he stopped. He listened. And when he heard his name his attention rose. Phil sneaked to the living room door and placed himself behind it. He glanced from behind the door at Dan, who seemed to pause for a moment. But as he continued, Phil's blood froze in an instant. He was telling the fans the trouble from last week. The black-haired boy wanted to step in between, but when he heard Dan cry, his body went numb. In an instant everything he thought of was completely blown away. Out of his mind. Dan started shouting and screaming and crying. The words he let out were all directed at himself. Phil slid down to the floor, pulling his knees up to his chest. Tears started to dwell in his eyes as Dan broke down completely. He put his hand over his eyes, restraining his need to start sobbing. When he heard Dan ending the video, Phil quickly got up, glanced at the camera and made his way out of the apartment hurriedly.

...

On the street Phil clenched his shirt in his fist, directly where his heart was. He let out the sobs he held in for this long. For months he had the feeling, that his world was falling apart. And now... it crashed. From one moment to the other his world was shattered. Before he even knew what he should do, Phil took out his phone and called Carrie.

"Hey Phi- What's wrong?", she asked concerned.

"H-hey Carrie...", he sobbed, "I was wondering... if you have some time... I'd like to talk to you again."

"Sure I have time, you can always come over if you want", Carrie told him.

"Can I... bring a good friend of mine too? She would like to meet you once." Phil tried to control his sobs, but he couldn't succeed.

"The more the merrier. And your friends are my friends too", she smiled, "See you in a bit."

"Yeah..." After the call ended Phil called Connie and asked her if she would want to come with him to Carrie's place. The red-haired girl agreed and Phil knew, she was worried too. But he wanted to tell them both later on. The black-haired boy went on and got to the park, where he would meet the red-head.


so that's it :3 thanks for reading lovelies