Jump!
Part 1: Yellow
Arc 1
Seven
"It's all… wrong,"
Instinctually, I wrapped my arms around myself as an attempt to cover myself. I thought about the Byakugan and felt very stupid. My cheeks prickled and I blushed. On a more serious note, panic began to settle in.
"What do you see, Natsuhi?" Kou asked, her voice turning serious. She moved closer to Natsuhi and inspected me, although she obviously couldn't see anything.
I felt awkward under their piercing gaze.
"It's just… I…" Natsuhi licked her lips and squinted. "Well, her chakra coils look normal. Obviously. If they weren't, she'd be dead. What alarms me are her tenketsu near her third eye."
"Third eye?" I queried curiously. I knew of the third eye back in my original world. It had something to do with buddhism or hinduism, I think. I didn't know much else about it, other than it was associated with Asiatic religions, spirituality, and that the stoners in high school - you knew the ones - would frequently gush about "opening your third eye" during their smoking sessions.
Natsuhi shook her head. "It's complicated to explain, especially to an Academy student."
I furrowed my eyebrows. "Try me."
She held her gaze on me. After a minute, she sighed, then deactivated her Byakugan. She walked over to the board and picked up a block of chalk. She began sketching a human body and drawing lines. Her drawing wasn't perfect, but from what I could decipher, it was basic anatomy of our chakra network.
"This is a normal chakra network," she said. "We have tenketsu - pin sized nodes that releases chakra. Only I, a Hyuuga, can see this."
I nodded. "Okay. So what the hell is a third eye?"
"I'm getting there. Be patient, Kotori-san."
She drew large circles on regions of the body: the skull, the forehead, the throat, the chest, and down to one's shins.
"These are different 'chakras'. This is where it gets confusing, so stay with me. There's a… theory about one's 'third eye'. The third eye is said to deal with higher consciousness and such. It is said that if one unlocks its full potential, they are able to become clairvoyant and see the future. This isn't quite proven scientifically. This is why seers and prophecies are associated with the third eye."
I nodded, a bit incredulous. Third eye, huh? I never believed in meditating, third eye, or 'quantum plane jumping', but then again, I thought Naruto was fictitious. The more you know.
"We all have, to some extent, a 'third eye'. We have tenketsus surrounding it, just like any other part of the body. Chakra circulates throughout our 'third eye', and this is thought to help recognize, stay cognizant during, and combat genjutsus. It isn't truly scientifically proven as there isn't enough studies concerning it, but it's widely believed - even by various Kages. Do you understand?"
"A little," I admitted. It did seem a bit farfetch. Basically, people in this world have an actual spiritual third eye. The brain probably sends chakra around it. If the third eye signifies consciousness, it would make sense that the third eye deals with genjutsu and such. It fights off foreign chakra, or at the very least, helps an individual differentiate between reality and a delusion and allows the individual to mold chakra near the brain to send signals to 'wake it up', I suppose. It garnered a little skepticism, but in theory, made sense.
Natsuhi activated her Byakugan again and gawked at my body again. I shifted my weight as she stared in silence. The sound of the ticking clock, chalk tapping against a surface, and Kou's breathing filled the void.
"You… you don't have chakra circulating around your third eye," she finally said. "That's… that's weird. Peculiar. I've never seen this before in my life, and I looked at a lot of people's bodies You literally don't have tenketsus around it. Even if the third eye didn't exist, you still have an extremely grave complication. Every single human being has 361 nodes. You don't. Around your forehead, you don't have any chakra circulating it. If I would guess, I would say rather than 361 nodes, you have... " she squinted. "... maybe 359? 358?"
I bristled at her bluntness.. "So… I should be dead? Chakra isn't flowing near my brain, right?"
"Kotori-chan, you said that you were able to recognize a genjutsu once you're in it, right?" Kou asked, placing a hand on her hip and leaning against her desk.
I bit my lip. "Well, I guess. I mean, I only know because I know you'll put me in a genjutsu beforehand. If someone just…" I clapped my hands together, "... flung me in a genjutsu inconspicuously or without warning, I'm not sure I'd be able to tell."
Kou breathed and plopped down on her desk. "So. Natsuhi. I'm no doctor, but I could tell this isn't good."
"Well, that's just it. If I look at her - really look at her - I can see something else that's odd. Kotori-san, are you sensitive to chakra?"
I ran my fingers through my hair. I wanted to go home. My stomach was growling and I felt like some type of alien, being prodded, inspected, and interrogated. Well, you aren't from here, I thought darkly.
"Um, what do you mean? When I'm close to people, I can kind of sense their chakra, you know? I can kind of visualize it too, like in colors. Like…" I gestured to Kou. "Her chakra seems, very faintly… brown. Yours is a plain gray. Mine… would be yellow."
Natsuhi nodded and deactivated her Byakugan. "Your third eye doesn't have any chakra - that's because your sen-hasu (1) has a ton of it."
"What is that, now?" I asked tiredly.
"Another type of chakra, except, it's right here -" she pointed to the top of her head. "-and it also deals with consciousness. It allows us to somewhat sense chakra. We all sense chakra - killing intent, thick, large, or powerful amounts of it… we all feel that. Sensory types… go overboard. Depending on their sensitivity, they can sense from meters or miles away; if they recognize the signature, they can sense whose chakra it is, and so forth."
"Wait - are you saying I'm a sensor type nin?" I asked her with incredulity. I crossed my arms. What the fuck? I can sense other people's chakra? I never noticed it my nearly six years living in this world. I thought what I was feeling was normal. Didn't everybody see and feel chakra as colors?
"Well, you're not a ninja yet," Natsuhi replied dryly, "but yes. I've seen sensory nins' bodies. Their anatomy… their sen-hasu is similar to yours, except, for some odd reason… you have more flowing chakra."
"So. I'm a freak." I stared at my toes. I don't even go here, I amusedly thought.
"Basically, yeah," she said. She sighed and crossed her arms. "This was quite intriguing to study. Thank you, Kou-san, for bringing this to my attention. Kotori-san, I highly recommend you visit a doctor. You really, really need to get checked out. This might be an obstacle in your road to becoming a ninja. It's imperative a ninja is able to decipher whether or not they're in a genjutsu. We also have to find out why you don't have flowing chakra in your third eye, and how to correct it."
"If you come across a genjutsu on the field, you're over," Kou agreed. "This is a real problem. Not only did I waste an hour every week on training you, but you can seriously die in a battle."
My heart began racing, because, really? Did they have to fling all of this 'death' and 'battle' shit on me all at once? I mean… I'm five, give or take a few years and a lingering twenty something years.
"I…"
"Where do you live? I'll walk you home so I can talk to your mother -"
"-doctor's appointment can be at the end of the week, after school. I'll go with you, only because this is really weird and -"
I'm choking. Why am I choking?
"Seriously. Being able to break out of a genjutsu is vital-"
"- we may pull you out from this program if becoming cognizant is completely impossible..."
"... Kotori…?"
"- Kotori-san…"
I can't breathe.
My feet moved before my brain told them to. I flung myself out the door, my heart pounding in my throat. I ran and ran until I was outside the Academy. I gasped for air, clutching my knees as I panted.
(she can't breathe.)
I was surprised to see my mother home when I arrived.
"Had another lesson, Kotori-chan?" she asked as she finished drying up our dishes. I nodded and pressed my clammy hand to my temples. I'm sweating.
"What's going on?" she saw my face and frowned. "Was the lesson too strenuous?"
I shook my head. "I… I just feel sick. Flu. It's going around the school." I gave her a faint smile and trudged into my room. Throwing my bag on the floor, I slipped into my bed.
My head was aching terribly. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, slowly feeling myself drift to sleep.
I was tying my shoes. The game was beginning. The crowd was roaring in anticipation.
"C'mon, Amelia," my familiar teammate said. I looked up. My best friend - and libero of McKinley High's elite volleyball team - Lucy smirked. "Hurry up. We need you out here."
I smiled, nodded, and tied my shoelaces. "I'll be right there."
And tied them.
And tied them.
And tied them.
It was a frustrating, endless loop. My thumbs began to redden. Tying and tying and -
"Briggs, hurry the fuck up! We need you out here!"
The ball was being tossed around like a hot potato, the sound of hands smacking the ball filling the air. The crowd's roars were deafening. My fingers were aching. I kept tying them. One shoelaces under, now make a bunny ear, loop it around -
"Briggs, hurry -"
- then push the ear under the tiny little opening and pull -
"We need you out here! Don't abandon us, Amelia, we need you! Don't leave us!"
- and pull -
"God, Amelia, don't leave us! We need you! Please stay -!"
I woke with my shirt clinging to my back, sweat moistening my back. My mouth was dry and tears stung my eyes. Fuck.
The sounds of my friends crying out made me want to sob. I wanna go back. I wanna go back.
I squeezed my eyelids shut and rubbed them angrily.
Well, you can't. Buck the fuck up. I'm sounding like an annoying five year old - which, in reality, I am not - who's throwing a temper tantrum because I want to go back to Disneyland. This isn't some weekend vacation; this is real fucking life.
I sniffled and twirled my sheet, wet my tears and sweat, around my finger.
I took a peek outside. The sun was tentatively peeking out from the cloudless sky. It was morning and I had school.
Fuck it.
I plopped down on my pillow and wrapped the blanket around me closer.
"Kotori-chan, why aren't you going to school?" My mother's voice awoke me. "You're an hour late!" I felt a weight press on the edge of the bed.
I moaned. "I'm sick and I feel like shit. Can I cash a rain check? Please? I've been having nauseating migraines lately and the flu's going around, and -"
"Hold on," Mother interjected, "migraines? Why? Why didn't you tell me, A, and B, why are you having them?"
I wearily sat up in my bed and pulled my knees to my chest. I shrugged. "I dunno. It wasn't worth mentioning. I didn't want to worry you."
Mother sat down next to me and pulled my head to her chest. She sighed, petting my hair. "Five year olds who are nearly six shouldn't be having migraines, dummy. I'm taking you to the doctor."
"Money?"
She pursed her lips. "I worked overtime these past few weeks. I'm sure we can afford it if I just do some recounting and budgeting -"
I shook my head. "No, no, no. Mom, I'm fine. Really. I've just been having sleeping issues, that's why," I lied smoothly. I clasped her hand. "Don't worry."
She stared at me. "Kotori-chan… okay. You can stay home, sleep it off. But if I hear about your 'migraines' again, your ass is going to the doc. Got it?"
I nodded and smiled.
"Okay. Well, I'm going to work. I'll come during lunch so you won't be alone."
She rose and left, leaving me alone.
Returning my head to the pillow, I sighed. I couldn't return to school; I had to take a day off. I didn't want to face Kou and possibly Natsuhi. I didn't want to be flooded with the whole "go to the doctor", "you're gonna die", "you're basically disabled and need therapy" debacle. I didn't want another blaring reminder that I don't belong here.
I turned on my side and stared at my nails.
I don't truly belong here.
Finally, after what felt like days - but really was a few hours - of doing nothing, I slunk out of bed. My legs ached and although I wasn't in the mood to run, I figured I can take the long way to the library to return and check out more books. Anything to keep my veins pumping and my blood flowing. My interest in genjutsu was growing. I wasn't too excited about having someone else's blood spilt on my hands; genjutsu would pave a way for me to halt their movements without the mess. How awesome is that? It's a pity that I'm struggling in that aspect, because I've always been intrigued by it. It was never properly explored in the manga, outside overpowered and overexposed doujutsus. Characters shyly popped up here and there. Tayuya and Kurenai comes to mind, but they disappeared as quickly as they arrived.
I slipped on my shoes and my turtleneck and trudged out the door.
Walking through the village made me hungry. Grilled fish filled the air and the sounds of enthusiastic shop owners beckoning potential customers seemed alluring. I shook my head. Walk. Library. Home. That's it.
I stuffed my hands in my pockets as I entered the library. My headaches have been reducing since my nap, thank God. I had already made plans to stab myself. Truly.
The librarian nodded at me. She had grown accustomed to my periodic appearances. We're even on first name basis. Her name's Koharu and she lives with three cats. Yeah, I know; stereotypes are accurate, even in this world.
After an hour of sifting through the shelves and reading up on genjutsu, I was still dissatisfied. Not wanting to leave without borrowing a book, I grabbed another book on taijutsu and checked it out. After being approved by Koharu, I stuffed it under my arm and walked out.
I wished I had money; it'd be nice to take a nice stroll around the village, sit down at a mom-and-pop shop, and eat some dango and tea. Alas, I'm broke.
I began walking, peering down at the book cover. It looked silly; an animated version of someone throwing a kick in the air. I chuckled until I bumped headfirst into someone.
"S-Sorry!" I stammered, my book clattering to the ground. I scrambled to pick it up.
"Don't be, Kotori-chan."
I froze at the familiarity of the voice. I looked up abruptly, only to meet eyes with Kou. Anger was embedded across her face. Her hands were on her hip. Her chakra buzzed in agitation, akin to a group of bustling bugs. I swallowed thickly.
"Kou-san…"
"Don't bother. Why are you skipping school?"
Before I knew it, I was led into a tea shop by the ear. A cup of tea sat in front of us, smoke swirling through the air. I traced the outline of the cup and sighed.
"I don't want to see you," I admitted dejectedly.
"Why?" she asked softly. Her anger appeared to have dissipated slightly.
"I'm… I don't want to hear you talk about my genjutsu issues and my stupid second, third, fourth, whatever the heck, eye."
Kou frowned. "Kotori-chan, I just want to help you."
"I… I don't need your help. I can figure it out on my own." I've been doing that for almost six years since I was reborn.
"I'm taking you to the doctor," she told me. "I'm serious."
"No," I growled. "I said I don't need your help!"
Kou slammed her fist on the table, causing the other patrons to jump in alarm. Silence waved over the restaurant.
"Dammit, Kotori, I'm serious. I don't want your bratty bullshit. You have a problem. You have potentially a health issue that may render you unable to mold chakra, maybe cause you to leak cerebrospinal fluid in your nose, I don't fucking know 'cause I'm not a doctor. But that's exactly who we need to see. And I'm sure your mother would be thankful to know that I took your ass to the doctor and prevented you from dying in battle, and yes there is a possibility of you dying, but that's normal if you want to be a shinobi! If you're so scared of death, then drop the fuck out of the Academy and stop wasting our goddamn resources and the taxpayers' money."
I stared at her in disbelief. My stomach churned and my skin prickled with embarrassment and shame. I stared at my tea cup in humiliation. I was speechless. Her voice abruptly switched from whimsical to red-hot fury. I chewed on her rant. She's right; I am being an angsty brat.
I facepalmed myself mentally. I skipped school because… of what? I'm unable to dispel a genjutsu? I potentially have a problem with chakra flow around my brain? I pussied out? I'm scared of dying when the very one thing under the ninja job description is a frequent kisses with death?
"I'm… I'm sorry," I murmured. "I'll go with you, I guess. I can't say I'm not curious myself."
Kou's face smoothed. She breathed deeply, took a swig of her beverage - which, I'm not sure is tea - and got up. Slamming ryou down on the table, she roughly grabbed my arm and yanked me out the establishment.
I was back in the hospital again. Mint made it ways through my noise. I was immediately whooshed back into the recollection of visiting my mother in the same room. The white walls and meticulously polished floors. The eerie stillness of the entire building. The minty odor wafting through the air, so potent that you can taste it. The distant sound of sneakers squeaking and heels clicking on the tiles made my ears twinge. The pediatric waiting room was empty and quiet. Kou was silent.
"Sorano Kotori?" a nurse arrived in the doorway, a clipboard in her hand, squinting at a paper. She poked her head through. "Sorano Kotori?"
"That's me," I said. I got up from my seat. I glanced at Kou, who scrambled to her feet.
The nurse lead us to an empty hospital room. "Arakawa-sensei will see you soon," she informed us. Turning on her heel, she trotted out the room.
Silence engulfed us once more. I stared at my nails. Sneakers squeaked against the floor outside. The wind made a soft sound, rustling the trees. Leaves scratched the closed window, begging for entry.
After what seemed like an hour, the door swung open. A tall woman in heels waltzed in. She was beautiful; a lilac bob framed her tanned face. Cherry red glossed her lips and embellished earrings glinted in the light. Pacific blue eyes bounced from Kou and I, and she glanced at her clipboard.
"Good afternoon. I'm Arakawa Shion and I will be checking out Sorano-san. Please sit down here." She gestured to the bed.
I followed her command, plopping myself down on the hospital bed. My legs embarrassingly flailed, my feet not touching the ground. God, I can't wait until puberty. When was that again?
She unwrapped a stethoscope around her neck. Pearls coiled around her neck clinked with every brash movement. Pressing the bell to my chest, she listened diligently.
"So. What brings you here today?"
"Her chakra coils are weird," Kou spoke up, leaning in. "I had her checked out by a Hyuuga. She said something about improper chakra circulation around her third eye? Oh! I forgot, and she doesn't have all of her tenketsu nodes."
Shion's eyes widened. "I am unable to get in there without an x-ray, but it is safe to say that it is implausible." She paused. "If a Hyuuga checked you out, I can not dispute… Kotori-san, are you manipulating your chakra?"
I nodded. "I'm in the Academy. I practice molding my chakra at school and occasionally at home."
"Any symptoms? Discomfort? Weird feelings?"
I thought carefully. "Well, I do get migraines. I chalked it up to sleep deprivation, but they exacerbate when I mold chakra and really hurt whenever I attempt to dispel a genjutsu."
"Why didn't you tell me, Kotori?" Kou demanded. I shrugged helplessly.
"That is queer. You should not suffer from long term headaches when molding chakra. That is a symptom of a plethora of chakra disorders. Kotori-san, I am going to put you under for a scan, right after I take your blood pressure. Is that alright?"
I squirmed in my seat. "Sure," I murmured.
The scan was quick and easy. Heat engulfed me temporarily and lingered after I stepped out, but other than that, it was painless with little discomfort. Shion stepped away a bit to examine the scan, leaving Kou and I alone in the room again.
I twiddled with my fingers absentmindedly. I wondered if whatever abnormality I have will hinder me from becoming a ninja. I mean, fuck: I was miraculously "reborn" into the Naruto universe, where they can manipulate nature and do badass powers, but somehow, by the grace of some cosmic design, there might be a chance I won't be able to do any of that shit?
If I can't become a ninja, how can my mother live? That thought scared me. I gnawed at my thumbnail. If I'm unable to manipulate chakra or something, I'll have to drop out. I won't have a job in the next… five to six years, and my mother won't be able to pay for her treatment. My throat became thick with tears. Best case scenario: this chakra deprivation near my 'third eye' isn't a problem, I'm able to become a ninja, I pay for my mother's cure. Worst case scenario: I'm advised not to become a ninja, I drop out, become a civilian, and the possibility of paying for Mother's cure disappears.
I swallowed harshly. Fuck. Those are… those are difficult odds.
The door swung open, alarming me.
I peered into Shion's face. Her eyebrows were knitted together and her crimson lips were pursed. She clutched my scan behind her back and shut the door slowly.
"Well, we've looked at your scan…" she said slowly, glancing at both Kou and I. I licked my lips tentatively.
"Well? What is it? Can I be a ninja? Am I some weird alien? Do I need surgery?"
She sat down in a chair and faced me. "Well, it's… to put it simply, I've never seen anything like this in my years of medicine," she said. "I… this is amazing. Well, not for you, but for the medical community? For the scientific community? You are an anomaly. This deviates from ordinary. It'd be heaven for any doctor to examine you. It's like… like someone dissecting a frog with five legs, or a bird who is capable of flying with only one wing."
"Arakawa-sensei, can you tell us her diagnosis?" Kou asked.
"The initial theory was more or less correct. Her 'third eye' -" she put air quotes around it - "does not have chakra circulating through it. As you know, Kou-san, all humans have some sort of 'third eye' as it's dubbed, near their brain." She pointed a polished finger to her frontal lobe, or forehead.
"Chakra circulates in your brain and near your skull. In reality, chakra activates hormonal release that recognizes and, to some extent, fight genjutsus. Depending on the strength of the jutsu, this response can be simply being aware to having the ability to dispel it instantly. This helps to somewhat… block the illusion from doing any significant damage to your cranial nerves. Again, this depends on the severity of the jutsu.
"For you to understand your complication, you must understand the third eye. While yes, the third eye isn't scientifically proven, it's widely believed the third eye is synonymous to our pineal gland which does, obviously, exist. Once again, chakra is released from tenketsu nodes and responds to illusions. Without that hormonal secretion, it is possible you would be susceptible to all genjutsus, even the most basic ones. You do not have chakra circulating near your pineal gland. This is very, very, very bizarre."
I swallowed the influx of information. Our chakra system must work very carefully with our hormones. If I remember correctly from my school's Anatomy class, our hormones release on various stimuli, like neural, hormonal, and humoral. It appears that in this universe, hormones release on an additional stimuli: chakra. Chakra circulation stimulates secretion of hormones. Okay. Makes sense.
If hormones don't secret from my pineal gland due to chakra deficiency, then I lack the ability to remain alert if caught in a genjutsu. There's a high threat of damaging my cranial nerves - my brain - as well. There seems to be some type of range of damage; minor headaches that dissipate later on and - like Kou said earlier - leaking brain juice from my nose. Huh. That's… gross, but I guess I could deal? I mean, what are the chances of me even battling it out with a genjutsu specialist? Unless I get into any beef with an Uchiha, I think I'm pretty safe. Right?
Shion glanced at the scan. "Furthermore, rather than chakra flowing around your 'third eye', you have excess chakra around your rumored 'sen hasu', which is rumored to aid an individual in sensing chakra. In actuality, this deals with your pituitary gland. Everyone can sense chakra to a certain extent, but sensor type nin are especially able to refine this ability."
"So, it's confirmed: I'm a sensory type?" I asked. All of this information being flung at me was confusing. I have a rare, science-bending condition.
I swung my legs. "Okay. I… I understand, I guess. How are you fixing it, doc?"
Shion set her clipboard down and perched her glasses on the top of her head. "Well, it's hard to say. You're five. You're a growing child. Who knows? There's a possibility that this is a freak of nature and chakra will develop around your third eye, or your body will automatically distribute the chakra from your senhasu to your third eye. Maybe. Or, maybe it'll never distribute or develop and you'll be stuck with this disability - and yes, it's a disability. On the battlefield, if you run into someone who can perform basic genjutsus, you're screwed. You can be incapacitated temporarily. If you run into a genjutsu specialists who can do more complicated jutsus, you're quadruple screwed.
"I've attended the Academy and from the curriculum a few decades ago, there hasn't been someone like this in history. I'm no shinobi, though, so I'm a little hazy on genjutsus and the loopholes, but it's safe to say this: unless chakra distributes near your third eye, you will absolutely be unable to break out of a genjutsu."
I stared at her in awe. Tears stung my eyes. Fuck. She dropped a fucking bowling ball on my head.
"Will it im... impair my way of living?" I hated how my voice cracked. I cleared my throat, thick with rising tears.
Shion sighed. "No, it won't. You will have headaches if you're in a genjutsu, and there's a myriad of issues that may ensue. Like I've said, I haven't stumbled upon anyone like this in my years of being a doctor, so I can't say for sure. There's a possibility of scarring brain tissue. Damaging the nerves in your brain if you're in a prolonged genjutsu. I'd have to estimate perhaps being under a C-rank genjutsu for over an hour.
"Judging from your symptom of slight discomfort when you mold chakra, if you were to exert a large amount of chakra, you may experience excruciating pain. In a battle, this will prove to be hinderous and will serve as an opening to your opponent. I don't have to tell you, an Academy student, how perilous this can be."
Shion tucked her pen in her coat's breast pocket and looked at Kou.
"I'm a medic nin, though. It's not my choice whether or not to pull this child out of the program, Kou-san, but I'd highly recommend it. The risks are too high and it'd be an unnecessary death if she pursues a shinobi career. If you are unsure, I would suggest taking it up with Hokage-sama."
My eyes widened. "The Hokage? Is it this serious, ladies?" I asked, nervously chuckling, despite my sudden crippling anxiety over finding out that this fucking doctor thinks I shouldn't be a shinobi.
I hopped off the hospital bed. "I mean, okay, okay, I get it: you think I can't be a kick ass kunoichi -"
"That was not what was said, Kotori-san," Shion interjected.
"-but, you gotta give me a chance. I mean, I have the will. The 'Will of the Flame' or some shit, right? I want to fight for this village."
"It's Will of Fire, Kotori-chan, and I agree with Arakawa-sensei. I think we should set an appointment with the Hokage. He needs to know about this. I'm not… I'm not sure anyone has seen this condition before. First, he needs to be notified about this. It's my duty as a Konoha shinobi, I guess - to inform him about something odd or noteworthy. Second, we can implement some sort of plan for your future."
I swallowed harshly. My throat was thick. My mood darkened once more. Fuck. "I… I want to fight for this village," my voice quavered.
Kou didn't hear me. "Arakawa-sensei, if you don't mind, could you make copies of Kotori-chan's files and meet with us at the Hokage tower tomorrow at 7 AM?"
Shion sighed. "I am sure my schedule is free at that time. I suppose we can go."
Shion rose and held out her hand. "It was an absolute pleasure meeting you, Kotori-san. I wish you well on your journey to becoming a Konoha ninja, and I will see you tomorrow."
She exited the room with a flurry, leaving behind silence and the wavering scent of jasmine and gum.
I breathed deeply. My fingers trembled. I'm going to meet the Hokage tomorrow. Fucking hell.
Kou walked me home. She bought me a popsicle "for my troubles".
"So. You scared?" Kou asked as we trudged down a hill. Leaves kissed the concrete. The abundant trees danced quietly through the soft zephyr. The sun was still out and sweat beaded at my forehead, my hair clinging to it.
"Yeah. I guess." I muttered. I finished off my popsicle and stuck the wet stick in my pocket. I hugged the book to my chest and sighed.
"I just… Yeah. I'm fucking scared. I'm really fucking scared. I wanted to be a ninja to help my mother… that was my job, that would've been lucrative enough to pay for the cure so my mother could live and see me… get married, have kids, succeed."
Kou took a thoughtful lick of her blueberry popsicle. "Ah. It's only natural for you to want that. My mother died. Nine-tail fox attack."
I winced. "Sorry."
She shrugged. "Ah. Whatever. I was, what…? Fourteen? Fifteen? It was tough, but that's what we have to endure. We have to persevere. Death is as common to us as… the sun shining in the morning, y'know? I mean, it was expected. So, it's cool that you're sacrificing yourself for your mother."
I kicked a pile of leaves. "I don't see it as that. I'm not sacrificing myself. I'm just doing it for the money."
"That's odd. Y'know, I don't think I quite believe you," Kou said. She smirked.
"Why?" I queried, frowning.
"I don't think anyone wants to do what we do for 'the money'. Yeah, the money and helping your mother live is a huge plus, but… you want it for something else. I can tell." With that, Kou finished her popsicle and flashed her blue-tinted teeth at me.
I chewed on that the rest of the walk home. I mean… I am doing it for the money. Why else would I do it?
(you're gonna make the money, save your mother, and retire after becoming Chuunin. You're going to marry, settle down, and take over Grandmother's bakery)
Why else would I do it?
(you're going to leave the rest of your money to your kids and die of ripe, old age. You'll want to be cremated. That's how you wanted it in your old life, to die in your sleep; so why not achieve it now?)
I'm not a monster. I don't want to kill people. I'm just doing it for the money.
(... but truly…)
"This is your house, ne?" Kou nudged me. I looked up abruptly.
"Yup. Thanks, Kou-sensei. I'll see you tomorrow morning."
"Say hi to your mom for me, 'kay?" With that, Kou flung me her popsicle stick. I caught it and raised an eyebrow.
"Keep it. As a gift, I guess. I don't have anything to give you besides a doctor appointment and I'm not sure what you like. See you!"
I tucked the stained popsicle stick in my back pocket and entered the house.
"Mom? Grandma? I'm home!"
(... rather than let yourself perish…)
(... wouldn't you want to see
The world burn?)
Footnotes:
Senhasu: senhasu is 'thousand lotus' in Japanese, according to google translate, haha. It's actually sahasrara, the chakra on top of your head. It's symbol is the thousand petaled lotus and it deals with consciousness and cognizance of one's soul and symbolizes rebirth (wink wink).
Author's Note: Sorry for the late chapter! I've been really lazy in editing this. School is just taking a toll on my life. I'm a dramatic freshman, I know, but I'm so lazy now. I really cannot wait for the summer, because I'm not sure how I'll be able to make it through!
I hope my explanations of 'senhasu' and 'third eye' were easy to comprehend? I tried to explain it as best as I could without sounding complicated and weird and stuff. This has ties w/ Hinduism I believe, which Kishimoto drew inspiration from when creating Naruto 'chakra'.
