~O~
Shun stared up at the ceiling of his room, his eyes distant and unfocused. He had injected another dose of the drug into his veins before the previous dose had even had a chance to fully run its course. Through the walls of his room, Shun could hear people walking down the hall. They were making idle small-talk, but Shun couldn't make out any of the words clearly, either from the drugs or just because the walls muffled a good bit of what was being said. Both were very real possibilities. At one point, people walking by his room would have made Shun anxious.
He had always feared that somebody would pop in when he was under the influence of his drugs and discover his dark secret, but that fear had long since vanished. Since Alice's death, the others in the enclave left him alone, and with good reason, too; they knew he was unstable. This became apparent when nearly the entire Clan witnessed Shun attacked Dan shortly after their arrival back. The raven-haired teen, in a fit of rage, had come very close to killing his friend. Albeit, Dan had said some rather harsh words that provoked Shun, but it still didn't change the fact that the raven-haired teen had wanted to see Dan suffer.
Shun lifted his hand above his head and gazed blankly at it. He recalled the way his veins in his hands had bulged out from beneath the skin as he gripped Dan's throat. That had been over a month ago, but the image was still fresh in his mind. It wasn't the only image, though. There were plenty of others, and it seemed that whenever Shun recalled one of them, he immediately went to find another syringe to try and forget the memory. Sometimes he went for two doses if the memory was bad enough. The primary memory that caused him to double-up was of the fleeting moments before Alice's death.
Everything about those few seconds seemed to be burned into Shun's mind, and every detail was as vivid as if it really were happening all over again. Shun weakly ran his hands through his hair. No….Can't remember that….Not now…Shun forced his mind to push that awful memory back into the dark corners of his mind, but the memory seemed to have plans of its own. It refused to leave him alone, and next thing Shun knew, the memory was starting to play for his mind's eyes. "No no no no," he said with a shake of his head. He refused to see those images again. He saw them almost every time he closed his eyes, and they would play over and over again when he slept, assaulting his dreams and taking away precious hours of sleep.
Shun clambered out of his bed and ungracefully tried to reach his bathroom, where he kept a hidden stash of syringes; he had to put a stop to this memory before it got a chance to take hold again. But as he staggered to the bathroom, he lost his balance and tried to grab onto a nearby dresser to catch himself. He latched onto the piece of furniture but held on too tight and ended up pulling the dresser down with him. The large, heavy wooden object crashed on the floor and broke in several places. Shun swore under his breath and tried to get back to his feet, but realized that he couldn't due to the fact that the dresser had fallen on his leg.
Because of the drugs, he felt no pain, but also couldn't tell if his leg was hurt. So, he didn't know if trying to free himself would cause more damage to his limb. Shun stared at the dresser for a while, as if looking at it would make it somehow move on its own. That was when he caught something out of the corner of his eye and cried out. A pool of red was starting to seep out from underneath the fallen dresser. Shun stared in horror as more and more of the red liquid spread across the floor. In a state of pure panic, he screamed for help.
~O~
Loran had been walking down the hall from his own room when he heard a sound coming from a room further ahead. Confused as to what he was hearing, he strained his ears to try and figure out what this sound was. In a way, it reminded him of an injured animal, but as he listened more carefully, he was able to make out one word; help. The realization of what was happening hit Loran. Somebody's hurt. Loran didn't hesitate another minute. He took off running down the hall until he reached the room that the cries were coming from. When he finally got to the source, a cold dread came over him; it was coming from Shun's room.
"Help! Somebody, help!" he heard the raven-haired teen shout from inside. Loran quickly prepared himself for whatever he would find on the other side before going in. He then opened the door and hurried inside. What he found was a rather strange sight. Shun was on the floor, a wooden dresser laying on his leg, but with the way that Shun was reacting, one would have believed the raven-haired teen was dying.
Shun's fear-filled eyes found Loran in a matter of seconds. "Loran, hurry! Help me!" he shouted. The young Vampire quickly jumped in to help. He easily removed the fallen dresser from Shun's leg, which was something that the raven-haired teen should have easily been able to do himself. Once the dresser was gone, Shun continued to stare at his leg in horror. "There's so much blood…..," he whimpered. Loran glanced down at the teen's leg in confusion. "Shun, your leg is fine," he stated. Shun began to shake his head. "No, it's not! Can't you see the blood! It's everywhere!" he cried.
That was when it clicked for Loran. He knelt down beside Shun and said, "Look at me." Shun didn't listen at first. He simply continued to babble on about the imaginary blood. Finally, Loran's patience grew thin, and he gave Shun's shoulder a good shake. "Look at me!" he shouted. The raven-haired teen shut his mouth and turned his gaze to the gray-haired Vampire. Loran only needed that brief look into Shun's eyes. "Just as I thought," he said harshly and stood up, "You've gotten back into those drugs." Loran walked to the other side of the room to get his thoughts in order, but as he started to walk away, Shun cried out, "Don't leave! My leg is hurt!" That was when Loran felt himself snap.
"You're damn leg is not hurt! You are hallucinating from those drugs! It's all in your head!" he shouted. He should have stopped there, but there was so much more he had to say. And once the first word was uttered, the rest spilled out. "You made progress and finally got clean! For what? To just go back and screw yourself up again!? We worked hard to get to where we did, and you just threw it away? All because things got difficult? Well, reality check, Shun. Life is difficult. My own brother killed my parents and so many of my friends, and in the end, he died, too. But you don't see me destroying myself in order to cope with my loss! The way you cope says a lot about how strong you really are, Shun. And right now, you're showing me just how weak you are." Loran, exhausted from his outburst, narrowed his eyes at Shun.
He didn't expect the raven-haired teen to have registered anything that had just been said, so when he began to cry, Loran was taken aback. "You're right," Shun said with a sob, "I'm weak." All of Loran's rage faded upon hearing those words. "Shun…." The raven-haired teen used the heel of his hand to wipe away the tears that were running down his cheeks. "I was weak before, but Alice was my strength and now that she's gone, so is my strength…." Loran felt an overwhelming sense of sadness for the raven-haired teen.
He knew that Shun had been suffering since Alice's death, but Loran didn't think he had been suffering to this extent. "She wasn't your source of strength. She was your reason to be strong," Loran told him, "But just because she's gone doesn't mean you've lost your reason, too. You can still be strong for her and carry on her memory. I'm sure she would want that more than this." Loran motioned to the broken dresser that lay shattered on the floor beside Shun. The raven-haired teen was silent for a moment, then looked up at Loran and said, "I….I need your help to become strong again…I can't do it on my own." Loran smiled and stood up from where he knelt, then held his hand out to Shun and said, "Of course, but you have to put forth the effort, too." Shun stared at Loran's outstretched hand for a moment or two before finally taking it.
He helped the raven-haired teen to his feet and told him, "Let's go and get you some blood. It'll help dilute the drugs in your system and sober you up quicker." Shun didn't protest. He let Loran lead him through the corridors of the enclave to the room where they kept the blood for general consumption. Loran, feeling that Shun was still a bit too strung out to fix his own glass, took the initiative and began to prepare one. Once the blood bag was emptied into a glass, he handed it to the raven-haired teen and instructed him to drink. Shun took the glass and quickly killed its contents. "How long has it been since you've had any blood to drink?" Loran asked.
Shun wiped away some excess from his mouth, and without meeting the gray-haired vampire's gaze he said, "A few days…" Loran sighed and went to fix another glass, knowing good and well that Shun needed more to drink than one bag's worth. Not so much to sober up with, but for the sake of nutrition. We don't need another incident like Sinclair's, Loran thought to himself as he poured another bag into the glass. Shun gladly took it and downed it as quickly as the last. "Do you want another?" Loran asked. Shun shook his head and told him, "No, I think I'm good for now."
Loran nodded and went to clean the dirty glass. As he stood over the sink and ran warm water over the chalice, Loran heard Shun ask, "What am I going to do when the drugs wear off? I don't have enough control to keep myself away from them…" Loran sighed and placed the glass on a towel so it could dry. "We'll just have to keep you away from that stuff until it's worked itself out of your system. Then we'll go back to the blood transfers to make sure all of the remaining traces are eliminated, too. It might take longer than last time, but you'll get better."
He heard the raven-haired teen sigh, and Loran couldn't help but do the same. They had gone through this tedious process once before, and there had been times when it seemed like Shun was on the verge of a relapse. Thankfully Loran had caught him each time and had been able to keep it from happening. However, the gray-haired Vampire couldn't help but worry that he wouldn't be as fortunate this time. It was blatantly obvious that Shun was deeper into the drugs than last time, so the chances of him continuing to use were high. What if Loran wasn't there when the thought of using crossed Shun's mind?
The result would be in another relapse, and the treatment would only take longer. That was when an idea came to Loran's mind. He glanced over at Shun and said, "I have an idea as to how to keep you out of the drugs…..but I doubt you'll like it." Confused, Shun asked for an explanation. The gray-haired Vampire hesitated a moment before saying, "Well, the best way to keep you away from any substance would be to lock you up in a room and let things take their course. It wouldn't be fun, and more than likely the withdrawals would be Hell at this point….but it's the only thing I can think of that would work." Shun was silent for a moment as he weighed this idea in his mind. Then, he looked to Loran and said, "If it means I get better, then I'll do whatever it takes."
Chapter title based off the song The Strength To Go On by Rise Against. So, my classes have resumed and so far I feel like I'll like all of my teachers. None of the classes seem particularly difficult, with the exception being maybe Comp 2 because of all of the papers we have to write, but I enjoy writing, so it all evens out. I think my favorite class will end up being my Bio 2 class, though. We're talking about the different Kingdoms and there's going to be a whole test on nothing but plants, so I'm excited for that cause I finally get to learn something that pertains to my major. And on top of all of that, we have a three day weekend, so no classes on Monday. Woo! I can sit around and do nothing. Yessssss. Anywho, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, so please read and leave a review on the way out. ~Copperpelt~
