A/N: Soo I'll be honest I put off writing this chapter, mainly cause I thought I wasn't gonna right it well enough. I'm kinda happy how it turned out though, so if you guys feel the same please let me know in the reviews. I do appreciate all your thoughts and insights and if you want to share either please do.
With that said I've an announcement to make, I'm going back to school tomorrow, Monday, and I won't be able to update more than once a week. So don't worry if you don't see an update, I haven't given up on this story, I'm probably just swamped with work. Fifth year isn't fun, you guys.
Anyway, enjoy this chapter!
Chapter 7: For the First Time in Forever
Anna took a deep breath as she led Elsa down the street to the new bistro. She was focusing on the footpath in front of her, making sure her foot didn't catch in the uneven and time cracked concrete.
After she parked her car as near to the restaurant as the parked cars allowed, the young redhead went around to open the door for Elsa. She admitted that as much as it was to protect her property from being knocked off it's hinges, she didn't want Elsa to get hurt and she really wanted her to impress her. However, on her way around the car, she managed to get foot caught in her own blasted car and in the end, Elsa exited the vehicle without Anna's assistance.
She nearly huffed and puffed but one look from Elsa and she was all warm smiles and gentle words.
The redhead firmly told herself when they started heading towards the bistro, that she wouldn't trip and make a fool of herself in front of the elegant, poised blonde. She was absolutely consumed with her very important self-administered task that she never realised that Elsa looped their arms and traced absent-minded patterns with her thumb on Anna's biceps.
She was getting perpetually more worried with each step that brought them towards the bistro. It only opened recently, an extension to a widely popular Parisian bistro operated by a son of a chef who stumped around claiming anyone could cook. And Anna overheard one of the younger Detectives praising it wildly, amongst gushing about what occurred after the meal was finished. The redhead nearly tackled the young man to get the address, probably scared him half to death as well and convinced more officers that she was insane.
But now as they were nearing the establishment, Anna became worried that Elsa wouldn't share her enthusiasm for French food and wouldn't enjoy herself half as much as Anna wanted her to. Maybe she wouldn't even want to see Anna again. What she do then?
She shook her head to clear her thoughts as they approached the metal hanging sign, embedded with the famous rat logo.
Elsa's arm was tucked into Anna's as they stepped into the the bistro, the warm air wrapping the two contrasting women in a tight hug. The air inside a contrast to the cool night.
The aromatic smell of meticulously prepared food wafted through Elsa's nostrils, tickling her appetite in all the right places. She could feel her mouth watering as she experimentally sniffed the air inside the bistro under the pretence of looking around the tasteful interior.
The dark boiseries were illuminated in the low hanging lights suspended over each individual table. The chairs' elegant dark wood with plushy red velvet matched the dark tables and fitted underneath them perfectly like a glove. And as the waiter, a tall auburn haired man with sparkling green eyes, led them over to a more secluded corner of the bistro, Elsa concluded that the interior had a definite French streak to it.
The dark wooded chair slid under Elsa as she sat down at the offered table, nodding a polite smile to the waiter.
The redhead flashed the blonde a wide smile and rested her hand on the table. Elsa reached out, pausing slightly in hesitation, and rested her hand Anna's, thumb circling the redhead's knuckles. Anna's grin widened at the gesture and the slight tension in her shoulders dropped like a sack of flour.
Good going Anna. She extended her fingers to squeeze the blonde's thumb.
"I didn't see you as someone who likes French cuisine," Elsa remarked cautiously, icy blue eyes glancing around the establishment. "You seem more like an Italian type of person."
Anna shrugged, "I don't seem like a lot of things and yet I am."
"Like what?" The blonde cocked her eyebrow.
Like totally falling in love with this one cute blonde girl. You may actually know her too, sweet like sugar and more beautiful than the stars and heavens. Gods, if you only knew how I couldn't stop thinking about her all day, it's like she's already become my entire solar system and galaxy. And I really want her to become my universe too.
"Like having a horrible sweet tooth, seriously, I could eat anything as long as it was sweet. But my favourite has to be chocolate, yes sir," the redhead giggled. Elsa swore her heart swelled in her chest with the affection for the younger woman.
She's so cute.
"And what would be your favourite chocolate, Miss Bunker?"
"Hmm, now that's a difficult question Miss Arendelle, you're putting me on the spot," the redhead tapped her finger against her lower lip in mock contemplation, "I say my favourite would have to Lindt because it tastes like actual chocolate? It just melts on your tongue and, ah! It's absolutely amazing, best chocolate you can get without paying an arm and a leg for."
The redhead giggled nervously and Elsa grinned, squeezing Anna's hand.
The tall waiter returned with a jug of water and bread basket, menus tucked under his arm, and set the jug and the basket between the two women as they somewhat reluctantly slid their hands away from each other.
"Have you ever been to been to France?" The blonde asked after the waiter handed them their menus and slunk away to tend to other patrons in the bistro. Elsa flicked through her menu as Anna filled their glasses. The blonde nodded her thanks at the offered glass.
"I have," the redhead took a sip of her water before continuing, "Kristoff, the tall blond guy that was with me the other night, and myself went to Paris with our class when we were sixteen. You know, a class outing before the exams started. I think our teacher thought it would do us good to actually speak French outside of class, but I'll be honest, I had Kristoff do all the talking," she pushed a lose strand behind her ear as she reached across the table. Elsa grabbed her hand without hesitation.
"The food is just so different from chippers that I couldn't help it, I stuffed my face with everything in sight. I don't think I actually remember anything from that trip but the food." Anna finished with a chuckle, eyes focused on hers and Elsa's hand. She flipped Elsa's hand over and started tracing lines across her palm, noting that Elsa shuddered at her light touch. "I must admit, food is sort of my life. Although I can't really cook anything but a toast and even then I burn it, so I stick with eating out most of the time."
The redhead looked up through her eyelashes to lock eyes with Elsa.
"Have you ever been in France?" her voice was quiet, and Elsa leaned forward to catch the words.
Definitely not counting all her freckles.
"I went with my parents when I was very young, regrettably I remember very little," she shrugged, fingers stretching out to caress the inside of Anna's wrist.
Anna nodded. Comfortable silence fell over the two as the younger of the duo flipped through the menu with her free hand. The blonde busying herself with one of the baguettes in the bread basket. Anna stole a glance when the torn off piece of bread was pressed up against the red lips and she swallowed thickly when it disappeared into the wet cavern. She snapped her eyes back to the menu, willing her libido to stay down and let her enjoy the night.
"Where are you from exactly?" The redhead looked up at Elsa, "I mean Punzle mentioned you weren't English before but she didn't tell where you were from?"
Elsa took a sip of her water, "I was born and raised in Norway – Bergen area," she smiled at Anna's raised brow. She concealed her giggle behind her hand as Anna's expression grew from slightly surprised to an exaggerated appreciation. Still smiling, she turned the question back at Anna.
"Hmm, well I was born in London but I spend a lot of my childhood in Ireland, Galway city specifically. My mother was Irish, you see, so I lived with her parents until I was eleven, then I moved back to England and started going to secondary school here and yeah." She smiled brightly at the woman opposite her.
Before Elsa could inquire any further, the waiter returned and asked if they had chosen what they wanted to eat. Their hands separated and fingers flipped through the pages of the menu with practised dexterity.
"Um, could I have a Blanquette de Veau and a Paris-Brest for dessert, please." The redhead replied swiftly. The waiter muttered an affirmative, scribbling down the order in his little notepad.
"And you, ma'am?" His head turned to Elsa.
"A Confit de Canard and a strawberry pie would be lovely, thank you," she passed him a small smile.
"Perhaps you could bring us out a bottle of Chateau Latour 1982 as well?" Anna added after a moment, winking at Elsa when she levelled her with a questioning look. The waiter nodded and took up their menus before leaving quickly.
Isn't that expensive? Elsa wanted to ask but stopped herself short, she didn't want to bring up the topic of money this early on.
"Aren't you driving?" Elsa cocked her head at Anna, hand returning to the smooth surface of the table to grasp the warmth of Anna's flesh.
"I'm only going to have a glass with the food," the woman answered quickly, her hand squeezing Elsa's lightly to bring weight to her answer.
A bottle of the wine Anna requested, and accompanying glasses, were dropped off on their table by the waiter. He offered to open it, and upon uncorking the bottle poured in the ruby liquid into the simmering glasses. Anna nodded her thanks and clinked their glasses together.
She swirled the dark liquid around in it's glass and took an appreciative sniff of the beverage, an equally appreciative sip followed.
"Mind me asking something?" Elsa asked somewhat hesitantly, taking a tentative sip of the wine in hopes it would give her some courage. She felt her insides curling in on themselves from the fine wine, it's like they were trying to back away from the poison Elsa fed them, but found themselves trapped in a cage made of bones and skin and muscle. A wall impenetrable from both inside and outside.
"Sure," Anna replied with a grin, her own glass returning to it's place where it would vigilantly vanguard the table until the mouthwatering dish would arrive.
"Why did you decide to be join the police? I mean you don't really seem the type and ah," Elsa sheepishly looked down, biting her lip. She could hear Anna's grin widening across her lips.
The redhead turned Elsa's hand over again, tracing meaningless lines with her fingertips, making Elsa quiver in her skin. The blonde hated to admit how sensitive her hands were, perhaps it was the lack on manual work in her life and the constant pampering when she was still a child, but even that didn't provide a suitable excuse for how the lightest brush against her palm or the back of her hand could ignite an inferno across her skin.
"My parents were part of the force. I guess I just kinda wanted to follow their footsteps and I really don't like to see people hurt so I guess that was part of the reason too," the woman shrugged and turned her attention back to their intertwined hands. Fingers trailed up to the inside of the blonde's wrist.
"Were?" The fingers stopped their tantalising touch and splayed against the pale flesh.
"Yeah, they died when I was fifteen, shot on duty," her voice was but a whisper. The redhead sighed at the bitter memory and forced the lump that threatened to bob up in her throat back out into the depths of her heart, a place she hadn't visited ever since she became a Constable. Now was not the time to drown in sorrow and she willed herself to not follow the lump of sadness.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you," Elsa feigned an apologetic look.
She didn't feel particularly sorry for the faith her parents had suffered by her hand, although it was an accident – that's what she told herself at least. She did feel sorry, however, for making Anna suffer and for hurting her in the progress: the white streak in the younger woman's hair standing as evidence of her guilt. She forced her eyes down when they started to trail up to look at the offending mark hidden in the vibrant red and prayed Anna didn't notice.
She couldn't look her in the face. Anna's soulful eyes would reflect the sadness and hurt and all the emotions she kept under the pillow ever since Elsa mercilessly took her parents away from her. They would plague Elsa's dreams and follow her around and more than anything, they would make Elsa feel guilty. She didn't want to feel guilty. It was an accident, she didn't mean to do it, so why feel guilty about something that she couldn't have stopped anyway?
Now that's a lie. You could've stopped it if you wanted to. But you didn't and for God's sake look the girl in the eye. It's your fault so at least help her shoulder her broken heart.
"It's fine," Anna gave her a dimmed smile, eyes watery.
Great Elsa, look what you've done now.
A faint inkling of regret itched underneath Elsa's skin and she wanted to squirm at the unusual sensation. She was so caught up in chastising herself for upsetting the one person in the world she never wanted to hurt that she nearly missed the next words that went past Anna's pink lips.
"What do your parents do?"
She could barely make herself look up at the redhead, not wanting to face the sadness emanating from Anna's gorgeous eyes but knowing she should shoulder some of it. She was the cause. She ought to shoulder some of the hurt Anna was experiencing even if it was an old scar's ache. She should be there for Anna.
Perhaps it was then that she realised that she never wanted to see Anna sad or in pain which bore no physical wounds. She wanted to make the redhead feel good, make her happier than anyone ever has, but knew in the dark corner of her mind than it would be her that would in the end cause her the most pain.
"My dad's a businessman, nothing exciting really." The blonde swirled the wine around in her glass, lifting her eyes to lock with Anna's, forcing herself to swallow each ting of disguised sadness.
"You've very pretty eyes, Anna," it came out without thinking and Elsa winced, expecting a rebuffing comment that told her she was being too forward. Apparently she had no control over her mouth now, and she'd pay for it surely, but somehow she couldn't bring herself to care. She was almost glad for saying the words.
They are so beautiful.
She heard Anna chuckle at her remark, a warm smile gracing her face and a splash of absolute adoration making her eyes twinkle in the dim lights. Elsa's breath caught in her throat and tongue darted out to lick her suddenly dry lips.
"Thank you," came the reply and the fingers restarted their lazy pattern.
Anna had been told by nearly every single significant other that her eyes were pleasing to the eye, but somehow when Elsa said it she felt warm all over. It was like her voice soothed out any bumps and bruises and scars on her heart and made her feel whole. Maybe it was in the way she said her name or maybe it was the way she looked at her, but Anna felt warm and complete in that moment.
"You know they say that eyes are the window to the soul," she took a steadying breath and maintained the eye contact, "and if that's the case then yours is absolutely dazzling."
Thin eyebrows shot up into Anna's hairline and her mouth opened and closed like a fish. She cleared her throat and attempted to hide the blush that overcame her cheeks like the Easter fire. She wanted to tease Elsa, to see her blush with a flirty remark but she couldn't find her voice.
Not once has anyone ever told her that she was a good person.
"You know," Elsa tried to break the silence that took over the two. She wanted to apologise for her forwardness but one look at Anna's face and she bit back her words.
"I always thought that beauty was something tangible. But now that I look at you I see that it's not a thing but a feeling. It's something that makes your soul quiver. It's how you feel inside and how it reflects in your eyes. And what I see in your eyes is so vast, so calm, like the ocean and it's pulling me in." She reached out to caress Anna's cheek.
"There's so much beauty in you. You've a beautiful mind, a soul that shines brighter than the sun, and yet I see so much sadness in you. It breaks my heart, because pain changes people and you've lived with more pain than most people will ever feel in their lifetime. And yet, you're constantly the kindest person I've ever known. You're an embodiment of optimism and selflessness and a little a like a ray of sun. But I've a hunch that this little ray of sun hasn't see the light for a long time. Anna, you can steel yourself against any kind of hurt, but the simple act of kindness will undo you, like right now."
Elsa's thumb swept away the solitary tear that silently slid down Anna's cheek. Her other hand came up from holding Anna's and cupped the redhead's cheek, thumb moving gently across the freckled cheekbone.
"I... I don't know what to say," Anna's voice was but a whisper, hand coming up to hold Elsa's hand on her cheek.
"You don't need to," the blonde smiled.
Anna smiled back, her eyes crinkling and eyes shining.
Elsa understood her, she saw her for who she was and the blonde wasn't running away from it, she held onto her fast.
And Anna, for the first time in forever, felt truly content and complete.
