Lebanon, Kansas
1930
"What dump." Peter Jenkins one of the two Men of Letters stationed at the newly constructed bunker said, "You know, when I got this assignment, I thought there's be, I don't know, excitement, adventure."
"There's nothing worse than adventure my boy." The slightly older of the two, James Haggerty, advised, "Trust me."
Just then the phone rang and Haggerty answered. "Extension 765." There was a pause, then he said, "Yes. No. That's not the password." He shook his head. "There's protocol here, young lady. We'll be waiting." He hung up the phone. We have a guest-damn hunter. Frank's kid."
"Really?" Jenkins perked up, "Wow. What he did for her-t-hat was really something."
"He was something all right." Haggerty remarked.
They heard the sound of the door opening above them and get up to greet the newcomer. A young woman hauled a large struggling bag towards them.
"Holy buckets." Jenkins gapped, "It's really you."
"That's right, rookie." The woman replied, "It's really me-Dorothy. Now, which one of you geniuses is gonna help me kill the wicked witch?"
After Dorothy got said wicked witch out of the bag and sat her up at a table the three stared at the haggish creature.
"So, what do you have to say for yourself?" Jenkins asked the witch.
"Nothing." Dorothy spoke up, "I cut out her tongue. I've bound her, but it won't last."
"Wait." Haggerty added in, "You captured her all by yourself?"
"Yes." Dorothy replied coolly, "Despite all my lady parts, I managed to capture the wicked witch."
"Your father would be very proud." Jenkins praised, " I mean, did you know that he-"
"Wasted my time with his words." Dorothy interrupted, "And I'd appreciate it if you didn't do the same. Now, I have tried cutting off her head, burning her, dousing her with holy water. All she did was laugh. Nothing I know of can kill her. So I'm here as a last resort. I was hoping you stiffs have a way to kill someone from Oz."
As they talked, they didn't notice the wicked witch working on cutting the rope binding her hands with one of her long fingernails.
"Well, of course we do." Jenkins declared, "W-we have to. This place is the last true beacon of light!"
"All right." Dorothy responded, "Just open your damn books already."
"All right, Jenkins."Haggerty said, "Let's get to work."
"-dead ends." Haggerty said, after a couple of hours of futile searching, "Nothing but dead ends."
"There's got to be some way to kill this thing." Jenkins added, equally stressed.
At that point the wicked witch finally snapped the last of her bonds and jumped from the chair. Jenkins instantly went for her with a knife.
"Jenkins, no!" Haggerty shouted.
However it was too late. The wicked witch threw her hand on Jenkins forehead and his eyes flashed bright green. It looked as if he was under a trance.
"There's something here that belongs to me." The witch said through Jenkins, her new flesh puppet, "Take me to it."
"What the Hell's it talking about?" Haggerty asked.
"I have no idea." Dorothy admitted, "Do you have a lab?"
"Second floor, room 28." Haggerty answered.
Dorothy ran out of the room and Jenkins/the witch tried to fallow her. Haggerty grabbed him and a fight ensued. Jenkins/the witch got the upper hand and pushed the knife towards Haggerty chest.
"Wait!" Haggerty shouted, "Jenkins, Jenkins! I know you're in there."
"Jenkins is gone." Jenkins/ the wicked witch said.
Haggerty did a move and stabbed Jenkins/the wicked witch with the latter's own knife. Jenkins eyes flashed green again and he snapped out of his chance.
"You were right." Jenkins said with his dying breath, "There's nothing worse than adventure."
With that Jenkins died and Haggerty took off. Mourning his friend would have to wait. Now he had to find Dorothy.
Lebanon Kansas
2013
Dean and Charlie were reading the Men of Letters case folder on Dorothy, who was on the floor covered with a dark green blanket.
"Holy crap!' Charlie exclaimed, "The first case in the bunker involved Dorothy. She and the witch came into this room and they never came out. This will never stop blowing my mind!"
"Okay, pace yourself, Toto." Dean urged.
"Oz is real!" Charlie continued, calmer but still overwhelmed with excitement, "It's part of the fairy world."
Meanwhile Sam squatted down beside Dorothy. They had a lot to tell her about.
"We have to find her." Dorothy said.
"No, we have to talk before anyone does anything, okay?" Sam replied, "Dorothy?"
"Talk?" Dorothy responded, "Typical Men of Letters, standing around, having a nice, little chat with your noses buried in you books while your little secretary takes notes."
"We're hunters." Dean said.
"And who are you calling a secretary?" Charlie corrected her a little defensively.
"You're not a secretary?" Dorothy asked, "You're a Woman of Letters? W-How long have I been out?"
"That's why we need to talk." Sam began, "Look, you've been gone for over 75 years. Now, according to our flies, you came here to kill the wicked witch and then disappeared. What happened?"
"We couldn't find a way to kill her, so I did the only thing that I could." Dorothy said.
Lebanon Kansas
1930
Dorothy was when the computer room mixing a spell into a glass bottle when the wicked witch appeared. Which was just what Dorothy wanted.
"It's you and me forever, bitch." Dorothy said before capping the bottle and they both disappeared into a flash of light.
Haggerty flung the door open to find nobody there.
"Dorothy!" He called out, "Dorothy!"
Lebanon Kansas
2013
"A binding spell that came at a price-her soul with mine." Dorothy finished.
"So you've been frozen with the witch for all this time?" Sam asked.
"Yes." Dorothy answered, "Look, the witch cannot be killed. If I am awake, then so is she."
Meanwhile, the witch in question had found her way to the dudgeon.
"Hello, lovely." Crowley, who was still locked up down there for the time being, said.
The wicked witch tried to cross the Devil's Trap the boys had put down in case any of the few remaining topside demons tried to get to Crowley, but it brunt her feet.
"Sorry." Crowley said, "This litter box is warded against everything, even wicked witches. Big fan. Love your work, even with the personality changes I've been undergoing, but that's another matter."
The wicked witch let out an angry hiss and her eyes glowed green.
"What's the matter, darling?" Crowley asked, "Cowardly lion got you tongue? Right. Enough chitchat. Must be here for a reason." He wrapped a crayon he had been given around a piece of paper and threw it at her. She caught it. "Write it down so daddy can help."
Meanwhile, back in the computer room, Sam was asking, "Wait, if she's here, why didn't she kill you?"
"She can't." Dorothy answered bluntly.
"You're protected by the Witch of the North's kiss." Charlie added in, "It's from the books."
"Oh, forget the books!" Dorothy snapped, "They're not important. I'm protected. You aren't. Now, the witch came here looking for something. I have no idea what it is. But we have to find her before she finds it."
"All right, all right." Dean said, "Charlie, dig into the flies. See if you can find anything that puts a dent in the witch."
"Mm-hmm." Charlie agreed.
"Sam and I will have a look-see." Dean continued, "Come on."
"I'm helping." Dorothy protested.
"Yeah, I don't doubt it." Sam said, "But for right now, why don't you rest up and help the smartest person in the room."
They boys took their leaves, leaving the two girls alone with each other.
"So big fan." Charlie said her back to Dorothy, but turning around.
"Hmm." Dorothy responded.
"Ozma of Oz-" Charlie began.
"Is a total ass." Dorothy cut her off bluntly, rolling her eyes a little.
"You were much nicer in the books." Charlie said, dejected.
"Those books are the ravings of a sad, old man-my father." Dorothy replied.
"Wait." Charlie said, "Your dad was L. Frank Baum, the writer?"
"A man of letters." Dorothy answered, "Another glorified librarian, you ask me."
"Hey, these guys might have been sexist, but like all librarians, they were wicked smart, too." Charlie said, "The dude who was here when you came in-Haggerty-he kept you case file open, worked it every day until he retired. Obviously, he never found you, but if you took five second to read, he did find a way to fight the wicked witch. Do you remember the poppy fields in the first book?"
"That's not actually how it happened." Dorothy replied, "It was much bloodier."
"Stop...ruining my childhood. " Charlie said patiently, "Do you remember the poppies?"
Dorothy nodded.
"Good." Charlie continued, "Haggerty made a deal with a fairy and got some poppy extract. I'm gonna get some bullets on the gun range and make us some poppy bullets. So, are you coming or what?"
Dorothy fallowed her out of the room, genuinely impressed.
Meanwhile Sam and Dean were clearing the bunkers with their guns pulled.
"You know, Sam." Castiel spoke up, "You didn't necessarily have to leave the girls to research."
"And why is that?" Sam asked.
"Why is what?" Dean asked.
"Talking to Cas." Sam explained, "I'll tell you in a little bit."
"You could always just smite the witch." Cas said.
"You think that would work?" Sam asked.
"Well, there are a few exceptions, but smiting works with just about everything," Cas answered, "I see no reasons why this witch would be different."
"So what's going on?" Dean asked.
"Cas thinks I should just smite the witch." Sam explained.
"You can really do that?" Dean asked.
"Apparently." Sam replied.
"You wanna try it on this thing?" Dean asked, "I mean, maybe we should test this out on smaller game first."
Before the conversation could go on, they could hear Crowley start whistling "somewhere over the rainbow."
"Wow." Crowley said upon seeing them, "If it isn't the Scarecrow and the Tin Man. Your new houseguest-so misunderstood."
The boys looked confused.
"Neither of you saw Wicked?" Crowley asked.
"What did she say to you?" Sam asked.
"Something along the lines of..."Crowley began, then he hissed loudly.
" All right, well, I'm gonna go get some holy oil and a lighter, dick bag." Dean said, "It still oughta work."
"I know what she's looking for." Crowley said quickly.
"What does she want?" Sam asked.
"I'd be happy to tell you, as soon as I get to stretch my legs." Crowley said,
Dean unlocked the neck cuff while Sam held a gun and Crowley and he stood up.
"Oh." Crowley breathed, "Ahh."
"All right." Sam said, "What does the witch want?"
"Give me a moment." Crowley replied, "I still need to air myself out."
Dean pulled his gun and fired a shot, barely missing Crowley.
"I think you've aired out enough." Dean said.
"Rude." Crowley responded, then he held up a piece of paper with the word "key" written on it.
"Key?" Sam responded, "What key?"
" I haven't the foggiest." Crowley admitted, "Had to send her on a merry chase before she could melt me. Told her your boys keep the keys in the kitchen. You do have a kitchen in this crap hole, don't you?"
When the boys entered the kitchen, their guns at the ready, it was a complete wreck.
"Damn it, I just cleaned in here." Dean cursed.
"Really?" Sam responded.
"Looks like we got a witch here." Dean said, ignoring Sam's last comment.
Suddenly someone entered from behind them and the boys swung with their guns drawn. When they saw it was Charlie and Dorothy they put them away.
"Sorry." Charlie said, "We raided your gun range. Made us some poppy bullets. They won't kill the witch, but they will stun the crap out of her."
"That's my girl." Dean said with a proud look.
"There was only enough for four bullets so...make each shot count." Charlie instructed.
"Now we just have to find her before she finds whatever the Hell's she's looking for." Dorothy replied.
"She's looking for a key." Sam spoke up.
"How do you know?" Charlie asked.
"Little birdie told us." Sam answered, "Ring any bells, Dorothy?"
"Unfortunately." Dorothy answered, "It's the key to Oz. There are magical ways into Oz-tornado, eye of a hurricane, whirlpool-but this key will turn any locked door into a portal to Oz. Insert key, twist, and presto, you're in Oz."
"How did the Men of Letters get the key?" Sam asked.
"I have no idea, but if she finds it, she'll go back and finished what she started." Dorothy said gravely, "She'll destroy all that is good in Oz. She's got armies of witches, flying monkeys. Many will die."
"What's this key look like?" Dean asked.
Dorothy pulled out her journal and showed Dean a picture.
"I've seen that key." He said, "Found it when I was doing inventory."
"Where is it now?" Dorothy asked.
"My room." Dean answered, "We got to get to that key. All right, Charlie and I will go look in my room. Why don't you guys buy us some time?"
Sam and Dorothy left.
"Charlie?" Dean began, "Safest place in this joint is the dudgeon."
"You have a dungeon in this place?" Charlie responded, "Of course you do."
"So maybe you should... Dean began.
"I am not hiding ,especially in a dungeon." Charlie protested, "Wicked witch, a key, a quest. Let's do this." She bounced away out the door, which did not instill any confidence in Dean.
"C-Charlie..." Dean called out.
