Discalimer: Not JK…
A/n: Written for the seventh round of the forum wide competition. The pairing given was Draco/Daphne and so I decided to break Draco/Pansy. If you were wondering, this happens in their seventh year after Draco returns from Christmas holidays.
Go Slytherin!
Chapter 7: Self dethroning of the Prince of Slytherin
Draco woke up in the middle of the night, drenched with sweat. The dorm was unnaturally cool, what with it being the middle of winter and the dorm being under the lake. But that did nothing to calm him. Draco shook his head to clear it up, to make the lingering images of the terrible nightmare go away. They never did. He stood up from the bed, giving up on the attempt to go back to sleep. He knew precisely what awaited him there. Ignoring the snores coming from the dorm, he descended the stairs to sit down on the couch. Sit down, not flop or slump, sit. Because Malfoys never displayed such inelegance. Not even when they were at the brink of insanity. Not when they were already too far gone to even look back. And Draco did not need to look too far to find his errors. Grievous ones. It was too late anyway.
It didn't matter that he did not want to be a part of this mess anymore. It did not matter that he was only seventeen. It did not matter that he was absolutely terrified. He had to keep living in the world he had made for himself. Or, the world his father had made for him which he had no choice but to accept. His father had laid the bed for him and he'd better lie in it by himself or he'd be thrown in.
There were no flames in the fireplace of the commonroom, which suited him just fine. That's what was left of him now. A heart with no flame of hope. A burned out heap of tissues. A soul that had been scalded over and over again until there was nothing left but a charred mass of nothing worthwhile. It amazed Draco how people still saw him as the invincible Malfoy heir. How students still move out of his way lest he inflict something painful on them. Did they not see that he did not have the strength to be malicious anymore? Did they not recognize the emptiness in his eyes? Did not feel the despair that would surely have been radiating from him?
Of course they didn't. Nobody ever did. Because they knew better than to associate themselves with the youngest Death eater. Because they saw him as nothing but a walking, sneering Dark mark. Not that he'd have let people get closer to him. It wasn't in his nature to open up to people.
Draco leaned his head on the armrest of the couch, lying flat on it, closing his eyes. Lying there, in the large commonroom, he could convince himself. Delude himself into thinking that he hadn't been to the Manor that Christmas. That he hadn't been a helpless witness when the Mudblood had been tortured. Pretend that he hadn't heard her scream. Act as if it hadn't bothered him at all. Within the confines of the commonroom, he could believe that Daphne was right. That he wasn't inherently evil and that he was right in not helping the Mudblood. But that illusion never lasted long. Morning came and he had to meet the students again, look at their terrified expressions, and he knew she was wrong. He was a monster and there was no escaping it. Then of course, there was the complicating situation between him, Pansy and Daphne.
He did not want to make up his mind. Hell, he did not even want to have this problem on top of everything else. And yet there it was, the ever present dilemma. The one decision he was left to make and he messed up. And so the images of his girlfriend and his crush came around in his mind, until he couldn't bear it any longer.
First arose the, he supposed Pansy was good looking in her own kind of way, pretty face of his current girlfriend. She had stayed by him even after he had failed the Dark Lord's task. Always admiring him in whatever he did, always convincing herself that he was some kind of tin god and she, his subject. He knew breaking up with her would be plain cruel after all that she had done for him but, when had he been hailed as a kind hearted person? She would realize the truth someday. Actually, Draco had a feeling she already suspected something. But she seemed content enough in tagging along with his dreary self, happy enough to come back to him even after he had taken quite a few snaps at her. That was exactly what made him feel, dare he say it? guilty about cheating on her, atleast in the mind.
And then there was Daphne, the one who had stood by him as a friend, always silent, always understanding, always painfully honest. She was the exact opposite of Pansy if ever there was one. How they remained friends was still a mystery to him. And he often wondered if they would stay the same if he broke up with Pansy and dated Dpahne. Though there was no chance for that. Daphne, content as she was in being his soundbox and companion, denied that she felt anything towards him other than a small bit of friendly affection. Which was a very intense emotion to confess about, as far as Slytherins were concerned. But there was absolutely no way to contain himself on the matter. He wasn't a playboy by nature, regardless of what the rumor mill of Hogwarts spun about him. But this, it was troubling him way more than it should. She wasn't supposed to be this captivating. It was supposed to be him that would be the admired. It shouldn't be her that should be declining to date him. Wasn't he supposed to be the confident one? But he couldn't go against her wishes. Not when she had helped him in those days when he had just returned from the Christmas holidays. She had helped him mend. There wasn't much she could have done but she had tried when others had just been content that the prince of Slytherin had dethroned himself. He chuckled at the thought. Noone who had seen him convulse that night would ever associate him with anything better than fragile and breakable.
Draco's thoughts continued thus in an endless circle until he heard footsteps come down the stairs. She was wearing her usual burgundy nightgown, an act of rebellion in itself. Whenever he had told her that she had just shrugged and said, "I dunno what's wrong with this. What's in a color?" She smiled seeing him there, as if him lying there in the middle of the night was completely normal. He sat up to give her room, but she sat on the couch beside him. Always at a safe distance.
"Pansy's being sulkier than normal now-a-days" she said, looking closely at his face for a reaction. A subtle warning that I should treat her better. That I shouldn't waste my time hoping.
"I'm not bothered" I replied off-handedly, though I knew I was lying.
"That's precisely what she's moping about. That you never pay any attention to her anymore"
"You know why I do that, Daphne"
"And you know very well that it is impossible, Draco. I think of you as nothing more than a friend. It is a complete waste of time for you to be hooked up over me. I feel bad about coming in between the two of you, as it is. You aren't my only friend, you know?" she appeared honest, and that hurt more than anything else. Of course that never showed on my face. My mask was still too securely in place.
"Doesn't change anything, Daphne. It's you I like. I admit it's a bit harsh on my part, ignoring Pansy like this but do you think she could be reasonable if I were to break up with her?"
"So? You do this behind her back? That's cheap and low, Malfoy. Even for you" she said as she suddenly stood up and left for her dorm, her gown swishing behind her. Neither of them noticed the figure behind the staircase, shedding silent tears.
Her world had just been shredded apart and she did not know how to fix it. And she had thought the Crucio was the most painful thing in the world. How lucky Granger was to have escaped from the Malfoys with nothing but a few pain inflicting curses.
A/n: Review!
