"Don't give up. Not never. Not for one single day. Be safe, if you can be. But always be amazing." ~ Clara Oswald
Caitlin frowned a bit as she stared at her reflection in the hotel mirror. As excited as she was to see her friend, she was worried about her. Everyone was worried about Felicity. They really wouldn't be good friends if they weren't worried, right? Felicity had spent such a small amount of time in Central City after they'd gotten her back, Caitlin was just worried that Felicity wasn't going to really be the same friend that she had connected so well with before. People changed when they went through intense trauma like Felicity had. She'd basically lived in hell for three years.
"Hey," Barry said as he came into view.
She didn't turn, but just stared at him in the mirror. "How is she? Really?" Concern was clearly in her voice, but she was certain that he'd seen it written all over her face as she stared at him.
Barry came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her, his chin tucking into her shoulder as he stared back at her. "Sweetheart, she's Felicity…she's strong…just like you…and she's doing okay… She really is…"
"Cisco said that, but—"
"He's right," Barry told her and kissed the side of her head. "And you should worry less."
Caitlin knew that she was a worrier, Barry knew that she was a worrier, though…he made a very valid point. She DID need to worry less, that just wasn't something so easily accomplished. It was something that she had been trying to work on since she and Barry had become a couple, but it wasn't an easy feat when Barry was always racing out into danger.
"What if she doesn't WANT company?"
"Isn't she expecting you?"
She was.
Caitlin and Felicity had plans.
"What if she was just trying to be polite?" Caitlin countered and turned to finally look at him. She and Barry had been in a steady relationship for a while now and they were comfortable and as much as they both wanted more, it just didn't seem like the right time. "I mean, we DID make the trip from Central City… I don't want to guilt trip her into—"
Barry laughed now, wrapped his arms around her again, and kissed her. "Sweetheart, stop worrying…really…Felicity WANTS to see you."
"She DID say that she could use a break from her mom…" Caitlin said slowly as she really thought about it. "Her mother is going to get to know Tommy while we're out…and Lyla and Sara are going to be home with them, so—"
"So, see!" Barry said brightly. "All set!"
"Where are you going to be?" she asked Barry.
"Building bookshelves with Oliver and Digg," Barry responded. "I think Roy and Thea might be there, too."
Caitlin's eyebrow lifted at that. "How is that going to go?"
"What?"
"I doubt Oliver uses instructions."
"What? Of course they'll use instructions…"
"Not so sure," Caitlin said and then kissed him, her hands on his shoulders, before moving away from him and going to pick up her coat and purse. She looked back at him. "I'm just thinking this is going to be a lot like when we team up… You and Oliver always butt heads…"
"That's not true—"
Caitlin just gave him a look.
"Okay," Barry conceded with a nod of the head as he raised a hand in defeat. "Okay, maybe you're right."
Immediately, she brightened at that. "I love when I'm right…which really…is all the time," Caitlin rambled. "But I just love it more when you actually admit it."
Barry just shook his head, a smile spread across his face. "Okay, Doctor Snow…let's get you out the door…"
"You're not going to walk me to the car?" she teased. Caitlin knew that Barry could be at the new place that Felicity and Oliver had purchased and have all the shelving put together before she'd even make it to her car.
"Do you want me to?"
"Do YOU want to?" Caitlin countered. "I wouldn't want you to be late…"
Barry smiled at that and weaved his arm into hers as they headed out. "I'm expected to be late anyways, right?"
Caitlin smiled at him. These little moments, she loved. They weren't a big deal, but him walking her to her car was sometimes everything. Brief touches and little gestures, but they were so huge…
"Is this weird?"
"What? Being out? Being out without Tommy? Being out just the two of us like a girls' night?" Felicity rattled off.
"Sure…all of that?" Caitlin asked after she thought about it for a moment. She didn't have any children, at least not yet. It was hard, though, for her to imagine to be so close to someone, to spend your every moment with that person through so much…for three whole years…and then have to figure out how to live without that person right there at your hip. "Any of it?" she added with a shrug. She really didn't want to push Felicity, she wanted to be there as a friend and knew how important it was to not push.
"It's easier with friends," Felicity spoke up after a silent moment. "It also helps that I know that Tommy's not leaving Lyla and John's—which I know has to sound horrible, but—"
"No, I get it… Their place is sort of like the safe zone right now," Caitlin supplied with a nod. When Felicity nodded, she gave her a smile. "Are you excited about the move?"
"Yes…and no…" Felicity replied honestly. "I need the space…but at the same time, it was a safe place with Lyla and John."
"It'll be a safe place with Oliver, too," she reminded. Caitlin couldn't fathom what her friend was going through, she could only guess. Likely, it was nothing that she could really imagine though. "You know that, right?" She wanted to know that Felicity wasn't pushing herself.
"I know," she said a bit wishy washy. Her head rested in her upturn palm as she stared across the table at the Italian restaurant they were dining at. "I just…it's been three years…and what if the feelings aren't the same? What if it's too hard? What if I'm not the person he remembers?"
"You're not," Caitlin spat out before she could think about her words. "But that's not a bad thing." She paused. "You're different, but you're also stronger. The entire time that you were held, you had Tommy with you…but did you think about Oliver?" She knew the answer to the question already.
"Yes," Felicity replied. "I thought of him most of all…and every time I would look at Tommy, I would see him. I STILL see him."
It was natural, Caitlin knew, but she had a feeling that that was a good sign. "Just give yourself some time, okay?"
Felicity nodded.
"And it's a three bedroom, right? There's nothing for you and Oliver to rush into," Caitlin reminded.
"Right, we've discussed that… Separate rooms, though I'm going to have to get Tommy and…well, myself…used to sleeping apart."
"That doesn't have to be done right away."
Felicity sounded a little sad about it. "I know…it's just…different." She was quiet for a moment. "But different is good."
"You're amazing and strong, Felicity…never give up on that…or anything that you set your mind to," Caitlin said. "And always remember that you have people…friends…family…here for you who will help you and do anything that they can."
TBC…
