I was snuggled up, head resting on his chest. I could feel the soft plush of his navy blue comforter under me as we laid atop his bed. I had chosen to spend the night with him in the Nike Cabin. I had faked like I was sleeping, because I knew Michael wouldn't sleep before he knew I was soundly dreaming. Because as soon as he thought I was dreaming, he had fallen right asleep. The sound of his light snoring was almost hypnotic. And because I was rested on his chest, my small body was moved up and down to the steady time of his breathing. My body was lifted up...down...up...down.

But the real reason I was awake, was because of the nightmare that had graced me last night. It was almost like a warning to me not to have sex with him, but once I was in the moment I disregarded the dream with ease. But that was what was scaring me. I was afraid of yet another nightmare. Whoever sent me the message last night could be back. So I silently laid here trying to stay awake. Looking to our clock and counting down the minutes until our Anniversary. It was 11:39. 11 minutes till midnight.

I tried to replay the events of my day. But there was no way the memory would even match what had really happened. Nothing could make me feel the same way I did just hours ago. Today had been a long Anniversary Eve, and I had became a changed Blake. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to feel proud or not. I did know though, that another minuted had went by and now it was 10 minutes till midnight.

I tried to think of every good thing that happened to me today. And all of Michael and I's past romantic days. 8 minutes. And I tried to think of how it felt, the weird combination of pain and joy at the same time. 5 minutes. I tried to think of all the reasons why I needed to stay awake. 3 minutes. I tried to count every time the words "I love you" had escaped my innocent lips. 2 minutes till midnight.

I watched the clock, watching each tick happen. The tintinnabulation of the little clock reminded me of little glittery bells being rung at a steady pretty beat. Tick. Tick. Tick. 1 minute left. Seconds left. My eyes began to feel heavy and I tried to fight it. But somehow I knew this would happen, and I had kept my journal with me on the bed. Michael asked what it was, and why I was sleeping with it. But if I tried to explain I was writing my thoughts down, I thought I would sound crazy.

When the clock read exactly 12:00, I kissed Michael's cheek whispering "Happy Anniversary," It had been two years since our crazy magic kiss. I tried hard, but there was no way I was going to stay awake. So I snuggled up, bracing myself for whatever whoever would through at me. All I asked was that they didn't ruin my night, because so far it had been perfect.

My eyes opened, as I felt the less then plush mattress underneath me. I was propped up, my eyes groggily making an unclear view. I blinked another time, then another. Getting focus. Around me, I realized I was in the infirmary. The bed looked partially stained and there multiple pillows propped up behind me. I was in an awful, awful nightgown. But at least it was a simple white. I probably looked a mess, because I felt unhinged.

I was in minor pain, but it was strange because I never remembered getting hurt. But the pain was dull, and it felt like it was on its way to being numbed. I couldn't figure out what was going on, and then I saw Michael sitting on the bed next to mine, his hands clasped together as he was looking down. When he noticed my eyes on him, he immediately looked up with a smile on his face. He looked like he had been deep in thought, and I had pulled him back to reality.

"What's..going on?" I asked more then confused. Why was in in the infirmary and feeling numbed. And why was Michael here. If i was hurt and just woke up, I would think his reaction would be a bit more well dramatic.

He came over to me, sitting on the edge of my bed with a glint of pride in his eye. "She's beautiful. Just like her mother," he said to me softly. And then it hit me. Wait a second. I hit rewind on my dream, and surprising I had more control over this one then my last.

"She's beautiful. Just like her mother." Michael looked to me softly, making the same motion he had just done seconds ago. I hit pause on my dream. I studied Michael, and he looked the same. Twinkling amber eyes, sexy brown hair. His face was still youthful. So I ruled out the possibility of this being in the far-ish future. I looked to my hands quickly, and there was no sparkling ring to comfort me. I looked back around, the people who were walking about the infirmary were all people our age, who were campers still. I hit play. "She's perfect. Your perfect...I love you. Both of you." he said taking my hand and kissing my knuckles. I paused again. We had a daughter? I had a daughter. I had a daughter? I...had a daughter. But then that meant...that would mean.

I woke right up, my eyes opening in a panic. I knew there was no need to jot down what had just taken place, I would remember that. But still, just in case, I wrote down the past events. My heart was beating so fast. The thump of the beat was almost so fast my chest was going to disinagrate. I tried breathing, it was just a dream. Just a dream. I only had sex once, and last night. And no one gets pregnant the first try, no one. And Michael was protected. I think. But my vision of that part was blurry. The whole moment I remembered, but that part was really faded.

I tried to take it calmly, closing my eyes to fall back sleep. It was just a dream was repeated over and over in a hypnotic swirl. But nerves were not that easy to make go away. A halfhearted chant wouldn't scare them off. Eventually though, I was lucky enough to lose consciousness. And even though I had fallen back asleep, my other dream was still lingering. I just wanted a few hours of sleep. My eyes were closed, and I was safely back in Michael's arms. A peaceful angel going to rest. Angels did no wrong, I was just paranoid. I slept soundly, my halo glowing brightly.

Paranoia didn't go away. I had figured that out the hard way. When I woke up, when we had breakfast. It was in the back of my mind the entire time waiting for me to click it again and access it. I tried to avoid it, and revert my thoughts. But it was there, always watching. During our morning "I love you"' it was there. Watching me. But then I needed to change, shower, get ready for the day. And eventually I made it back to my cabin, the Aphrodite Cabin. I was still in an panic from my dream last night, the dream I couldn't quite call a nightmare, I knew there was one thing there to ease my nerves.

My mother had made all of us girls in the cabin an emergency pregnancy tester. And since my mom made it, it was 100% correct all of the time. All of the time being from anytime after you had sex. So even know it had only been hours, it would pick up if I was...The p word. But there was no way that I was. Because...well I just wasn't pregnant. My pregnancy tester had always deemed useless for me, but right now I needed it just to calm my nerves and ease my thoughts.

I locked myself in the bathroom, holding the pink tester. It was instant testing. So in an instant I had results. I knew I was fine, there was nothing to be worried about. So why wouldn't I move my thumb to see the results. My stomach was in knots, the feeling just felt bad. I felt like all of the blood from my face was being drained out in fear. I looked at myself in the mirror, I looked awful in my pink pajama short and tight fitting tank top. I knew could've brought sexier pajama's to Michael's but I hadn't. My dark hair was all frizzy, from the rough night which consisted in constant tosses and turns. I looked completely causal, and if done right I could've looked cute. And for a quick moment I almost wished I was blonde again, because this was a look I knew blonde Blake would've been able to pull off.

I counted back from 3. 3 because of the 3 words I had said to him at 3:33. I didn't really have a better reason, it just felt lucky. Three. Two. One. I moved my thumb, looked at the results, and dropped the tester in shock.

I slowly slid down the wall, dragging my back with my heart down to the ground. I was planted on the ground, in a ball knee's hugging my chest. I wrapped my arms around me knee's burying my face as I began to cry. I was so stupid. I was so so stupid. Only something like this would happen to a girl like me.

Michael was going to hate me. He was. Because look what I managed to screw up. We have one night together and now this. And my mom, she was going to hate me. And my dad...I didn't know what he would do. He already hated Michael, he wasn't the guy he had visioned his angel daughter dating. But now, I think the hatred would skyrocket. And he would hate me too.

And the camp, they would think I was a slut. And I wouldn't be popular anymore, and people would look down at me. I would be the pregnant girl. And how to even tell my friends. Because I'm still afraid my friends aren't my friends. And if they would leave me now that I got int this mess.

And with that, I couldn't raise a child. I was 17. And immoral. And if the baby was immortal and Michael wasn't. Or worse, if the baby wasn't either. And children needed time, I've got forever ahead of me. But I didn't want to ruin Michael's golden years forcing him to be with a kid. A kid he probably didn't want. Which went right back to the possibility of him hating me.

Well, I once was an angel. I was sweet, and beautiful. And I had moments like last night that were pure magic and perfection. But my halo just cracked, and everyone would see the act. I was no angel, I wasn't good enough for that. Angel's were poised and perfect. I wasn't perfect, because of moments like this. Moments I try to hard to be perfect and end up messing every single thing up. As tears rolled down my soft cheeks, all I could think of wasn't the good but the bad. All I could think of, was imperfection. No angel had imperfections, because with them they couldn't fly.