A/N: I meant to post this over the weekend, but it didn't get done. I was out of town yesterday, and this chapter insisted on being ridiculously long. It's just over three pages, or 2,294 words. I blame it on Roy wanting more attention, because he's conceited. Eventually all this stuff will make perfect sense, just give me time. The next chapter will be posted this weekend at the latest. I'm hoping to get it done before that but I can't guarantee it.

Also, I'm considering getting a beta, so if you're interested let me know. I often write when I'm terribly sleep deprived and living on caffeine, so sometimes things that make sense to me don't make sense to anyone else.

Well then, on with the story!

Disclaimer: Sadly, I am not the owner of Roy, Riza, Selim, or Edward, nor do any of the other original Fullmetal Alchemist characters belong to me. However, this plot-line and the old Colonel guy mentioned briefly in Roy's flashback are property of me. No stealy!


Chapter 7: Tears and Healing

Throughout the hour Roy had given for their enemy to surrender, the patrols brought in hundreds of soldiers who were either giving up and accepting their fate, or offering to pledge their loyalty to the Colonel. He was surprised to note that the majority of them were switching sides. Though, he supposed, hearing that your fuhrer had been a monster would scare anyone. Still, it seemed as though most of them were truly loyal to him, and many had actually addressed him as their new fuhrer.

Meanwhile Roy was trying to help patch up the wounded, though that just seemed to make them admire him more. He wasn't afraid to get in there and help with the dirty work, instead of sitting at a desk and giving orders like many commanding officers. He worked alongside civilians and enlisted men, the ones that most of the higher-ups considered the lowest of the low. Roy found them strong and intelligent, and funny. Just because they didn't have the ambition to become more than regular soldiers or the calling to join the army didn't mean that they weren't human like everyone else.

That was how, when Riza Hawkeye came looking for him when the hour was almost up, that she found him joking and laughing with a few nurses and soldiers as they worked. "Sir, it has been fifty-five minutes."

Roy turned to her, still smiling, and nodded. Looking again at his new-found friends, he sighed. "Duty calls." He told them, pulling off what must have been his hundredth pair of surgical gloves that day and dropping them in a nearby trash can. He smiled as Hawkeye saluted him. "Shall we?" He asked, gesturing grandly towards the door.

She smiled as well, but said nothing, walking side-by-side with him out of the building.

xXxFullMetalAlchemistxXx

"Your time is up, former government! We were patient with you, but now you have given us no choice but to take down those of you who are left. A pity, really. Had you joined me, I would have given you your old positions, or possibly higher positions than before. Oh well, too late now, I suppose." The microphone was switched off, and Roy picked up his radio, giving the order for his men to attack. Things were running smoothly so far. He just hoped that the people he cared for would make it through the rest of the war.

xXxFullMetalAlchemistxXx

Fifteen and a half hours later, they had finally accounted for everyone, and reconstruction could begin. Roy was giving orders when a Sergeant ran up to him. "Sir, the ex-fuhrer's wife, she's committed suicide." Roy's eyes widened in shock as he realized what that would mean for Selim. He finished issuing orders and then demanded that he be left alone for a time.

Roy sat down heavily in his new desk chair. His subordinates had insisted that he take the fuhrer's office, as he needed to show his followers his strength and authority. He had not been able to argue with them. "Orphaned." He murmured, tears welling in his eyes. "Just like Ed. No one to go to, not a thing to your name..." He didn't know what to do. It was his fault a child had been orphaned. How many more children were without parents because of this reckless war he had started? How many more had lost loved ones? "How many died this day?" He moaned, blaming himself for all the death and destruction. He remembered several times when with a simple snap of his fingers, dozens died. He was thrown into memories...

The Rockbells. They were doctors, and hadn't done anything that would warrant execution. They had treated the wounded from both sides. They had cared about the Ishballans as well as their own men, because they knew that no matter what they looked like, no matter what they or their government had allegedly done, they were still people...still human. They shouldn't have died.

Countless women and children. The elderly, the sick. All had been brutally murdered at the snap of one man's fingers, because the military had ordered it so. They were completely innocent. They had done nothing that would deserve such a fate. Infants crying, feeling their mothers' fear. There was no reason for them to die.

One young man in a blue military uniform, staring at the desecration of the battlefield, and wondering what all these people had done to be given such a death. Tears poured down the young Major's cheeks as he realized that he had been the one to take so many innocent lives.

For the first time in his life, he questioned the military.

Roy Mustang was aroused from his disturbing reverie by a sharp knock on his door. Riza Hawkeye poked her head inside. "Sir, I don't mean to bother you but...it's Selim Bradley, Roy. He's asking for you."

Roy looked up sharply as the name left her lips. "Does he know about..."

Riza understood immediately, and nodded. "Yes Sir, and he's not taking it very well. He wants to see you."

Roy nodded, standing up and running an exhausted hand through his hair. When was the last time he slept? He couldn't even remember, it must have been a while. He should probably get some rest soon, but he had a more pressing issue at hand at the moment.

xXxFullMetalAlchemistxXx

"Selim?" Roy asked, knocking gently before opening the door of the hospital room the boy was staying in.

Selim was lying on his bed, his cheeks wet with tears. "Colonel Mustang?" He asked timidly, as if afraid he was wrong. To be told that both your parents are dead in the same day must be devastating. Roy hoped the child would recover from the psychological trauma such events were sure to cause.

"Yes Selim, it's me." The man answered, slipping inside and closing the door behind him. "Lieutenant Hawkeye said you were very insistent upon seeing me. What's wrong?" He knew he didn't have to ask that question. He knew exactly what was wrong, had known since he'd found out about Mrs. Bradley's suicide. Roy knew what it was like to lose both your parents, and he thought maybe he could sympathize with a poor, scared seven-year-old.

Selim whimpered, trying his best not to cry in the face of such a strong, powerful war-hero. Seeing his distress, Roy took off his military jacket, hanging it on the back of a chair as he went to sit on the bed next to the child. "Selim, there is no need to hide your tears. What has happened today has effected all of us, but you perhaps the most. Crying is not a sign of weakness; it takes a truly strong man to show his tears."

Even in the face of someone like Roy, whom he had known for such a short time, at those comforting words Selim could no longer hold the tears at bay. Unashamed, he buried his face in Roy's shoulder and wept. Roy cried right alongside him. They had both lost so much, and sometimes you need to let the feelings out, lest they consume you.

xXxFullMetalAlchemistxXx

"Roy?" Maes Hughes asked, knocking gently on the door of his best friend's dorm. It had been two days since they returned from Ishbal. Roy had been locked in his room the entire time. "Roy, I know that you're upset, and I wouldn't be bothering you, except the Colonel wants to see you."

A tired sigh was heard from within, and then the door opened to reveal Roy Mustang in such a horrible state that Maes couldn't quite believe that it was his friend standing in front of him. Roy's eyes were red and swollen from crying, and his hair was sticking up in odd directions, as if he had been running his hands through it a lot (Something he did when he was upset or frustrated). His uniform was bedraggled, obviously the same one he had been wearing when he returned from the war. At the same time, there was a set of determination in his features that hadn't been there before, as if he had made some sort of life-changing decision. "Maes, can I talk to you after I see the Colonel? There's something I need to tell you."

Maes nodded, shooing his friend off toward his duties.

xXxFullMetalAlchemistxXx

"Ah, Major Mustang. Just the person I needed to speak with." The old Colonel said.

Roy gazed at him dispassionately. He didn't particularly like the old man, just dealt with him for the sake of keeping the peace within their work environment. Roy did not deem the man's comment worthy of an answer, and so he remained silent. The Colonel did not seem to mind.

"Major Mustang, I'm sorry to say I have some bad news." Roy nearly growled. What news could be worse than the fact that he had just murdered countless innocents? "It is about your parents, Major. Perhaps you should sit down."

At the mention of his parents, Roy had swayed unsteadily on his feet. "I'm fine, Sir." He assured, remaining upright. "Please continue." Not that Roy necessarily wanted to know what horrible thing had happened that involved his parents.

"As you wish, Major. It seems that last night someone broke into your parents house. Most of the valuables were taken, and your parents...they were killed. I'm sorry, Son."

Roy decided that now was a really good time to sit down. He sank into one of the chairs in front of the Colonel's desk, trying to remember how to breathe. He didn't know what to do.

xXxFullMetalAlchemistxXx

He never knew what to do, it seemed like. Holding that seven-year-old orphan, the one that he had orphaned, he didn't know what to do either. This child needed parents, and Roy had taken them away with his stupid war. Suddenly he didn't think that taking over had been such a good idea, but it was done now. Hundreds—maybe thousands—had died, and he couldn't take it back now. He couldn't just say 'I've changed my mind' and have everything go back to normal. In a few short hours they were going to officially make him Fuhrer. After that, everything would change.

Roy thought of something else he could change. "Selim, I know that you're still upset about your parents, but you're going to need someone to take care of you. Do you have an aunt or grandparents or someone who could take you in?"

The little boy seemed to think for a moment, and then he shook his head. "Momma and Papa were all I had." He whimpered. "Can't you take care of me, Colonel Mustang?"

Roy froze in shock. Selim wanted the man who had orphaned him to become his caregiver? But at the same time...in the short time he had known Selim, he had become attached to the boy. He wouldn't mind adopting him, giving him a life worth living again. It was the least he could do. "Yeah Selim, I could take care of you...if that's what you want?" He almost didn't dare believe that this sweet child wanted him to become his new father-figure.

Selim nodded, a tiny smile overtaking his features. "I love you...Daddy."

Right then Roy's heart melted. If he'd had any convictions or insecurities about adopting this child, they were gone at those four short words. To hear Selim call him 'Daddy' was nothing short of astounding. They'd known each other less than a day and already such bonds had formed...it was simply amazing. Smiling, he responded, "I love you too, Selim."

They sat together for long moments, drinking in the other's presence, taking comfort in their bond. Whatever legalities would have to be taken care of in the morning, they were already father and son.

A tiny bit of the hole in Roy's heart began to heal. Though he would never fully recover from the heartbreak he had suffered throughout his lifetime, this child had come to him, and in less than twenty-four hours had bandaged the most painful tear in his soul. Too much had happened, and Roy would never be completely whole again; he had come to accept that. But this little boy could very well be a painkiller for his broken heart, and perhaps a new beginning.

He still mourned Ed. He probably always would, but now he had something to distract him from the constant pain and horror of knowing that no matter what he did, the man he loved was never coming back. Roy would come to accept that as well, in time. Someday, perhaps, he would find someone, not to replace Edward, but to fill another hole in his heart.

Living in 'someday' is meaningless. Today, right now, is what one should worry about. We are given so few hours, so few moments in time to remember those we have lost, and to live our own lives, that we, in turn, may be remembered.

That day, Roy Mustang was starting a new life, one where he had a child, where he was ruler of a country. But at the same time, he was continuing where he had left off, and he would forever remember his past, and the pain it had taken to get where he was. He would never forget those he had lost—his parents, Maes Hughes, Edward—but he also had to keep following the paths of life, making new bonds, and strengthening old ones. They would want him to keep trying, and now he truly had something to live for again. It was good to be alive.


I just want to point out that this IS NOT the end. There will be more, in case you didn't read the whole "The next chapter will be posted this weekend at the latest" thing. I had to mention that because I think it seems a lot like an ending, and if I wanted to just leave things like that I could, but I'm addicted to this story, so...I'm not done yet. Next chapter is coming soon, check my LJ if it's not up by Saturday night and feel free to whine at me.

With that, please review, it means a lot to me! Thank you, thank you, thank you, to everyone who has reviewed!