Watch out for the Windu...
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Mace followed Anakin through each hallway, carefully keeping a safe distance that allowed him to both leap out of the way of any disaster he might cause while at the same time keeping a close eye on him. The plan backfired when Anakin stepped into a turbolift.
Mace immediately planted his feet and crossed his arms. "We should take the stairs," he suggested in a tone that made it sound like anything but a suggestion.
This only caused the younger Jedi to cross his own arms and glare back. Mace was starting to wonder at what point in the day the youth had decided to be so indignant. "Why? The lift is faster," he argued.
"And potentially lethal," Mace snapped before heading for the nearby staircase. "You and your former master have a tendency to cause those things to malfunction and destroy themselves."
A loud, dramatic sigh sounded from behind him as Anakin stepped from the lift. "Fine, we'll take the stairs, but you do realize that there are approximately five-hundred and seventy-two stairs between here and where we need to be, right?"
Mace openly smiled at him and gestured with a wide sweep of his arm. "At least I know I'll come out of the experience alive and breathing."
Anakin muttered something under his breath and trudged by him. Mace waited until he was at least fifteen stairs up before following.
Five-hundred and seventy-two stairs later, he was standing on floor twenty-two beside an out-of-breath Anakin who was staring at his mechanical arm with a rather comical expression. "How are they even bent that way?"
Mace just knew the same expression was mirrored on his own face, but the fingers really were bent in some weird directions. Not to mention that his pinky had literally snapped off and was barely dangling there by a couple of wires. "Maybe if you had been wearing the glove that you're supposed to be wearing, they would still be in their normal positions."
"I haven't replaced it yet."
Mace's eyes rose from the mangled digits to the young Knight's face. "The glove? What did you do to it?"
Anakin shrugged. "It melted."
"How -" Mace started to ask, until Anakin sent him a withering look. "Okay... I suppose that one can wait 'til later. But this still wouldn't have happened if you hadn't tripped all those times."
Anakin huffed and started walking again. "Be glad it wasn't more. There's a reason Obi-wan and I take the lifts and not the stairs. Ever since he broke his leg on the rail we - oops."
Mace was attempting to drill a couple of holes through the boy's head with his eyes alone, but to his disappointment, it wasn't working. "I thought you said that happened on a mission."
The pace of Anakin's steps quickened as he tried to pull away from Mace. "Well, from a certain point of view, it kinda sorta did. We were just exiting the hangar bay, so we weren't technically in the Temple yet..."
Mace grabbed his shoulder and spun him around. The boy nervously twisted his dangling pinky while staring at the wall. "The hangar bay? You were exiting the hangar bay? Enlighten me, then, because I'm slightly confused as to how Obi-wan managed to break his leg on a staircase that consists of maybe ten steps."
The pinky snapped off, causing a few sparks to fly. "It's complicated."
"No kidding!" Mace grunted. "And then you lied in the reports!"
Anakin finally met his eyes. "Well Obi-wan wrote them! I'm not the only one you should be yelling at!"
"So take me to him!" Mace raged.
Anakin threw the pinky to the floor and spun on one heel, stomping away with Mace breathing down his neck.
This floor of the Temple was typically quiet since most of the rooms were classrooms, and at this time of the day, with only a few classes left, Mace would have expected almost complete silence in the hallways. So when they rounded a corner to be bombarded with shouts coming from an open door a few rooms down, he knew they had reached their destination.
"That's unfair!"
"Give the people what they want!"
"This isn't a democracy!"
"It most definitely IS!"
"YOU SUCK!"
A loud roar of approval sounded from the open door, followed by an even louder flood of laughter. Anakin had stopped, stunned, but Mace pushed by him and stepped through the opening, only to be hit on the forehead with a stray crumpled up piece of paper.
Breathe in, breathe out. They're only children...
Said children were all standing on their desks, some jumping up and down pumping their fists while shouting statements of approval or disagreement. The desks circled the room, leaving a clear spot in the middle, where Mace could assume his target was standing. The desks were in his way.
No matter.
"Put it to vote!"
"Yeah, let's vote!"
"But you don't count; you're in a different sector!"
"But I'm still affected!"
"I'LL decide who gets to vote!" an accented voice broke in.
"THIS IS NOW A DICTATORSHIP!" Mace bellowed, inwardly pleased that he'd come up with a statement that was somewhat relevant. Every voice faded and died as every head turned to stare at him. He stared back, knowing that every individual in the room would be intimidated, except maybe one. "And I am in charge," he snapped.
"Ah, here we go," that blasted accent continued. "Class, the Chancellor has now arrived."
A few chuckles were wisely covered up with loud, hacking coughs that lasted for a few minutes. Mace felt his blood start to boil. "Show yourself, Kenobi," he growled.
The sea of children obediently parted to reveal the Jedi Master standing in the middle. "I was wondering when you'd show up," the fool muttered. "Have you brought Anakin along with you? I believe he was after a datapad of mine..."
Mace glared at the shorter master, annoyed at the aura of calm he always presented. "He's waiting in the hallway - "
"I'm right here, master," Anakin butt in, shoving his way around Mace and ignoring the dark look he received in return.
Obi-wan's face went from rueful to concerned to annoyed in a fraction of a second. "Anakin, what happened to your hand?" He grabbed it and examined it while Anakin struggled to come up with an answer. Obi-wan glowered when he noticed the missing finger. "And where is the pinky?"
"It, um... well, it sort of... snapped... off," the boy stammered.
A ginger brow shot up. "Snapped off. Would you care to elaborate?"
Anakin snatched his hand back with a glare. "No."
"He tripped," Mace supplied. "Five times. I made us take the stairs in hopes of arriving in one piece, as opposed to not arriving at all by way of turbolift. You can thank me later."
Kenobi's naturally penetrating eyes jerked to him, but Mace would not be easily frightened, especially by that. Where Kenobi was concerned, one did not worry about the look of the face, but what came out of it.
"Thank you? For what... this?" Kenobi asked, grabbing Anakin's hand for emphasis. Then he turned and glared at his former student again. "And why the Force did you agree to take the stairs?"
Anakin merely shrugged. "He made a good a point."
Kenobi glanced at Mace. "Which was what?"
"Well, master, we do tend to destroy most of the lifts we use."
"But at least it's only the lift that gets destroyed, not you or me," Kenobi retorted. "You know better."
"I beg to differ," Mace muttered under his breath. He rolled his eyes at the glare that came his way. "For Pete's sake, Kenobi, this is Anakin we're talking about!"
"Hey!" Anakin shouted.
Kenobi crossed his arms. "Why are you here, Master Windu? I'm trying to teach a class, so please don't tell me that you came all this way to blame us for something that wasn't our fault."
Mace mirrored the other master's stance and drew himself to his full height. "It has to do with the Krill."
"You're wasting my time, Mace."
He almost wanted to smile, then. Once Obi-wan started talking to him on a first name basis, it meant that he was supremely agitated, something that didn't happen very often. After everything that had happened today, Mace was actually looking forward to a good fight with this man, one where he could finally beat some sense into the guy. "The proof is written all over Anakin's head," he said, pointing. "That bug came from you two, and you will be punished for it."
A ginger brow shot up defiantly. "Hardly definitive. The same evidence is plastered all over your own head."
Mace glared at him.
Obi-wan smirked in return. "What? Are you denying the fact that you have a rather... um... bulbous welt on your forehead?"
Mace could feel his eye beginning to twitch. "I am denying no such thing," he spat. "You, however, are being entirely unreasonable and, to be frank, uncooperative. Two things that are becoming more and more frequent." Kenobi crossed his arms again and Mace almost rolled his eyes at the gesture. It was classic Obi-wan. "Besides, you know that bug came from your apartment. Don't try and deny it. Your place was a wreck when I arrived, not to mention that you need a new door yet again, something that Anakin wholeheartedly claims was your fault..."
Obi-wan gestured to himself. "My fault?" His eyes shot to Anakin who was attempting to shrink behind a few initiates and their desks. The kids were trying to remain serious out of respect to the Jedi Masters that were arguing, but apparently it was proving to be quite difficult, as most of them were trying extremely hard to stifle giggles. Obi-wan peered through the sea of legs and zeroed in on his former padawan. "Anakin, how in the name of the Force, is it my fault you forgot the combination?"
"Um... because?" Anakin offered.
Obi-wan sighed, shaking his head. "Nevermind..." He looked once more to Mace. "Yes, we need a new door, something that I am apparently responsible for. However, that has nothing to do with matters concerning the Krill, something that I - WE - are not responsible for," he finished.
"You have yet to deny that the insect came from your apartment."
A muscle in the shorter master's jaw began to twitch. "Why is that of importance? Just because it came from our place does not mean that we intentionally 'unleashed' it, as you put it."
"Well someone has to pay for all the damage, and reputation alone puts all of the blame on you two, whether there's truth in it or not," Mace retorted. When Obi-wan's eyes narrowed and his mouth opened, Mace held up a hand. "It might not be your fault the Krill got into the Temple, but it is your fault for handling it in such a destructive manner. That I can blame you for."
"And what would you have us do?" Obi-wan asked. "Just leave the thing alone? Let it do what it wants? Mace, you saw the size of that thing and how ghastly it was. It sent Anakin to the Healers, for Pete's sake!"
"Perhaps," Mace coolly replied, regarding the younger master with a scowl. "But I don't think that warrants slicing up your cactus and throwing the pieces at the little monster. There are much more efficient methods than that." Mace's brow furrowed after he finished. Why was Anakin edging towards the door...?
Said door slammed shut and it took Mace a few extra seconds to realize that it had been Obi-wan's wrist that had flicked in irritation, not Anakin's. Typically it was the younger of the two that engaged in the frivolous side of Force-use.
Obi-wan's gaze hardened a little, though it was no longer aimed at Mace. "Actually, the cactus might have worked had it been intended for the Krill. In fact, that might have been part of my dear former padawan's plan... shame the blasted plant hit me instead. I suppose I can't blame him, though. The Krill was INTENTIONALLY mocking him and staking claim to a plant that had been with us for the better part of three years. There must have been some sort of attachment between the two of them, because I can't think of a better reason as to why he would attack a bug the size of a pebble for simply sitting on his poor, helpless, spindly, Force-forsaken, blasted piece of chizk plant..."
Mace stared, not quite knowing what to say. Apparently, whatever had happened with the cactus went way deeper than he had thought.
Anakin finally came out from hiding and shoved his way forward. "It was mocking me! And it's not my fault you didn't see the piece flying at you. You could have moved!" He shoved his way to the center and stood toe to toe with his former master, glaring down his nose.
Obi-wan was hardly intimidated. In fact, he was more than a little annoyed at this point, something Mace was thoroughly enjoying, though his anger at the two had hardly diminished. He was still fully intent on placing all of the blame on them.
Obi-wan placed a hand on the younger man's chest and carefully shoved him back a few steps. "I'm sorry, Anakin, but I was a little busy watching my fellow Jedi swing his lightsaber around like a drunk in a bar fight. You'll have to pardon my surprise," he sarcastically replied.
Anakin batted the hand away. "Maybe if you'd helped me, I wouldn't have to 'pardon your surprise.' Something I'm not going to do. Consider yourself unpardoned."
Obi-wan's eyes narrowed even more and a brow shot up again. An odd combination to see.
Mace stepped between the two of them, glaring back and forth. "You can argue about the cactus later. Right now, let's sort this other matter out. The Krill has left the building, so let's assess the damages." He walked to the board at the front of the room. All eyes followed his towering form. For the first time in the last ten minutes, he realized that he was still in a classroom. Mace cleared his throat and grabbed a marker. "Okay, class. Since you've heard this entire argument, why doesn't everybody participate here? I'll put their names over here," he said, scribbling 'Anakin/Obi-wan' on the left side of the board, "and everyone else over here." He wrote 'Everyone Else' on the right side.
He turned to observe everyone in the room, including the two gundarks in the middle who were now back to glaring at him rather than each other. "Let's start with Anakin and Obi-wan. What should I write under their names?"
Nobody raised a hand. Mace frowned when he heard an impatient sigh come from the middle of the room. "Allow me," Obi-wan muttered before regarding the class with a mixture of amusement and authority. "Class, our dear friend the Chancellor is asking you to weigh in both sides of what you've just heard. Evidence, arguments, etcetera. Don't be bashful."
Mace barely kept from lashing out at the 'Chancellor' comment. He would not be the immature one in the room.
Still, nobody raised a hand. Mace tapped the board. "Damages. Let's begin there. What did they damage?"
A hand shot up. "A door."
Mace nodded. "Very good. What else?"
It didn't take long for the raising of hands to turn into the shouting of answers without the raising of hands.
"Master Skywalker's head!"
"The ceiling!"
"A CACTUS!"
A knock on the door broke through all of the shouts. Every head swiveled and locked onto it. "Come in!" Obi-wan shouted.
A boy poked his head in and then stepped through the opening. "Sorry I took so long, Master Kenobi."
Obi-wan smiled a little. "No matter, Gavin. Feel free to take any open desk. We were just finishing up a discussion before class ends."
The young initiate found a desk, looked around, and then climbed on top of it. Obi-wan continued to look at him. Mace was beginning to feel a little uneasy. "Just out of curiosity, Gavin," Obi-wan continued. "Why did you take so long?"
The initiate glanced once at Mace, which only intensified the bad feeling in his gut. "Well, my room is pretty far away and I had to pass the Council Chambers on the way, and I guess something happened in there, because they had a clean-up crew and everything. A few Holonet reporters were there, but Master Fisto was keeping them away... I really don't know what happened. Something about the windows..." he trailed off, looking between the three older Jedi.
Anakin loudly cleared his throat with a pointed look at Mace. "Master Windu?"
Mace's eyes jerked to Anakin and settled there. "Yes, Skywalker?"
Anakin smirked. "Care to explain?"
Mace didn't blink. "Explain what?"
Obi-wan was uncharacteristically blunt about it. "It appears the most expensive thing Anakin and I broke was a door, Mace. While I sat on a chair picking thorns out of my foot, you didn't happen to blast out a couple of floor-to-ceiling windows did you?"
"No, I did not," Mace told them, emphasizing each word. The silence that followed lasted much too long. He finally looked away from Kenobi's penetrating gaze. "Master Mundi did," he finished.
The initiates were all staring at him, wide-eyed, Anakin had begun to laugh before he even realized he was laughing, and Obi-wan was doing the complete opposite. Glaring at him with eyes that were on fire. "I don't suppose you were going to bring this small detail to light?" he quipped.
"I didn't find it relevant to our discussion..." he started to say.
"Relevant," Kenobi echoed. "I have one question, Mace, and this might be slightly off topic, but I'm beyond caring at this point."
Mace barely kept himself from smirking. Ohhh, he's mad now...
"Do you have something against Anakin and I?"
The chrono switched to six-o-clock and the hourly chime sounded through the hallways. Obi-wan took a brief moment to flick his hand in a dismissive wave. "Class dismissed," he said, still glaring at Mace.
No one left the room.
"Well?" Obi-wan demanded, not bothering to dismiss the class a second time. If they wanted to stay and watch, then so be it.
"Aside from the fact that the two of you seem determined to make my life miserable, then no, I guess I don't," Mace shot back.
"We don't do it on purpose," Anakin snapped. "You just... sort of... get in the way."
Mace blinked. "Get in the way?"
Obi-wan brought a hand up and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Nice, Anakin. What a fantastic choice of words."
"Get in the way?" Mace repeated. He stalked forward until he was right in front of the young Jedi. Anakin took a couple steps back. "Was I in the way when you dropped a droid outside of my apartment this morning? Or when one of your neighbors comm'd me to complain about the noises coming from your apartment? Or when you decided to slice your door to ribbons, letting the bug escape that stung me on the head? Any of those?"
"Absolutely," Anakin said, not hesitating for even a fraction of a second. Then he looked at Obi-wan. "Would you care to back me up, here?"
Obi-wan suddenly felt a headache coming on. "Just don't speak, Anakin."
Mace had finally had enough. Talking wasn't getting anywhere. At all. "How about we handle all of this at once?" he suggested, fixing Obi-wan with a glare that few could match. "A duel. I win, you fix your own doors, deal with your own grumpy neighbors, and fix any of your 'accidents' that happen to occur."
Obi-wan smiled slightly. "And if I win?"
Mace matched the smile. "If Anakin wins, I'll apologize, and maybe even tolerate any later disasters you two cause."
Obi-wan's smile disappeared. "Anakin?" His young protégé had never dueled Mace before and had little experience dealing with an opponent that used a style more aggressive than his own.
Mace smirked, extremely satisfied. "Yes, Anakin. He made it quite clear before we arrived that he was clearly, clearly the brawn of the Team and you were the brains. I'm quite interested to see if this is true."
Anakin exploded. "THAT'S NOT FAIR!" he shouted.
Mace smirked. "Why not? I think it's perfectly reasonable."
Anakin held up his busted hand; the movement caused it to spark. "My hand is useless, thanks to you."
Mace cocked his head to the side. "So, let me get this straight. You're blaming Obi-wan for your own forgetfulness and you're blaming me for those five graceful falls you took on the way up here. Is that it? I'm responsible for your lack of coordination?"
"Completely. You suggested the stairs," Anakin bit out.
"And you agreed."
Obi-wan sighed. "Anakin, you're hopeless."
Anakin crossed his arm, the wires of his pinky finger poking out from beneath the folds of his robes. "Thanks, master. You're real encouraging." Then he looked at Mace again. "Fine. I'll do it, but only if you agree to use your off hand."
Mace turned, heading for the door. "I don't think so, Skywalker. You got yourself into this mess. Get yourself out of it."
Anakin huffed and followed. A loud roar of anticipation went up from the initiates as they hopped down from their desks and ran after the two Jedi.
When the room emptied out, Obi-wan stood in the middle, exasperation written all over his normally stoic features.
His datapad lay crushed on the floor, trampled by a few dozen feet. He picked it up, examined it, and determined that it was beyond repair. Then he marched out of the room, dropping the thing in the trash on the way by. "Anakin, so help me," he muttered. "If Mace doesn't finish you, I will."
Well? Any thoughts? Feel free to leave a few! Thanks for reading! :D
"Nobody ever died of laughter." ~ Max Beerbohm
