She was snoring lightly when he got up and headed to the beach. 9 weeks had passed now and once again he felt like they were stuck at some sort of roadblock. They spent each day talking, laughing, swimming, eating, and exploring the small island. Every night was heaven. She was warm and giving and he finally understood his friend's preoccupation with sex.
But it was only that. Sex. He thought that she cared about him. But not the deep, needful way he did about her. He loved her. She didn't love him. It was as simple as that. How could something so simple hurt so damned much? He had to face reality. He had failed.
Penny placed the fresh fish she had grilled before him and took the other seat herself. She smiled at him, enjoying the breeze coming up the beach. They rarely stayed in the house, preferring to sleep on the beach or on the deck of the yacht.
Sheldon reached over and took her hand in his. He sighed deeply and looked up. "Penny, we'll head home tomorrow. I'll take you back."
Her eyes widened with surprise. "But I thought we were going to stay another 4 weeks," she said softly.
"I can't," he confessed. He looked at her sorrowfully. "I love you, Penny. I love you more than anything or anyone in this universe. But you don't love me. I was wrong. I thought that if I brought you here, if we spent this time alone, and focused only on each other, you would realize you loved me, too. I was wrong. I truly thought you loved me, Penny. I thought that was the reason we were drawn together. I believed you loved me as much as I loved you, but you just didn't realize it. Please don't hate me," he begged softly.
Penny pulled her hand away and stood up. Without a word she walked out of the beach house and down to the water. Sheldon stood and watched her, his heart breaking into pieces. He loved her enough to end this now, before he reached the point where he would be unable to.
He walked back into the kitchen and threw away the food. He cleaned until the beach house was spotless. When he was done, he looked out to see Penny still standing in the moonlight. He approached her slowly, trying to conceal the deep pain he felt.
Penny turned as he got close and he gasped at the tears flowing down her cheeks. "You're right about being wrong," she said softly. "But you're wrong about what you are wrong about."
Sheldon frowned, trying to figure out what she meant.
Penny moved forward until she was only inches away. "You scared me so badly when we first got here. I thought you had gone insane, or maybe had that one lab accident Leonard was always talking about. I was worried that you were a threat."
Sheldon's heart sped as he struggled to accept her hurt.
"The longer we were here, the more I came to realize that I didn't know you. Maybe I never knew you." she said softly. "I saw you through Leonard's eyes. The neurotic, arrogant whack-a-doodle who was immersed in routines and schedules to the exclusion of everything else. But that's not who you are." Penny bit her bottom lip and seemed to struggle with her words for a second. "This is the scary part for me. It hard for me to say this, because it leaves me so vulnerable."
Penny raised a hand and he flinched, expecting a slap. Instead she caressed his jaw tenderly. His eyes went wide with wonder as she smiled up at him. "I do love you, Sheldon. It's not the sex, or the vacation, or the food, or even the scenery. I love you because you risked everything for me. You were willing to give up every dream you ever had, every goal you ever sacrificed for, to be with me. I love you because you have always made me feel special. I love you because you have always been there for me. I love you because of your beautiful mind and your wonderful heart. I love you because being with you is all I want. I really do love you, and when you said we were going home I realized just how badly it would hurt if I wasn't with you."
Penny smiled softly. "Please, Sheldon. I don't care where we are. Here, home, or some frozen iceberg. It doesn't matter. I need you. I love you. Nothing else matters to me, but that."
He cupped her face in his hands and struggled to control his growing hopes. "Penny, do you mean that? You aren't just trying to comfort me?"
Penny leaned up and kissed his softly. "Sheldon, let's go home. I want everyone to know that I love you. I want our friends and family to know that we are together. I want to go home so we can be a real couple. Not just two people on a magical trip to paradise, but two people in the real world, living their lives together. I need you, Sheldon. I don't know how else to prove it to you. Please. Let's go home and make a life together."
Sheldon looked down at the woman he loved with wonder. He had worked the numbers. He had begun this endeavor so certain of it's outcome. But now that it was here, now that it was a reality, he found he was not quite as prepared as he had assumed. He was overwhelmed by joy. He couldn't even find the words to tell her how he felt. So, he did what he was capable of doing. He pulled her close and kissed her with all the passion inside him.
Tomorrow. They would leave tomorrow. But tonight? Tonight they would make love in the moonlight.
