I wish you all again a peaceful and prosper 2010. May you be blessed with all your heart desires. With warm regards and all my thanks for being here. Lyxie.

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Chapter 7

I have to admit that she was a rather gifted cook. I really enjoyed the meal and after she had cleared the table, we sat in front of the fireplace, each of us holding a cup of herbal tea she had prepared. I had not talked much during the evening and she had not insisted on any subject as soon as she felt I did not want to answer. Yet now that we were a bit more relaxed - or at least I was trying to look that way, trying to be polite- she started to ask about my life back West. I remained silent for a long while, and felt her look on me, waiting, expecting me to let go and be more confident. Why? Why would she wanna know about my life before? When I was still a man, and not a bundle of broken bones and sore muscles? With no way to stand up, to take her in my arms and kiss her?

Because, I confess, the more I looked at her, the more I found her nice. More than nice as a matter of fact. She had that special way of staring at me without blinking for long seconds and starting to smile, as if she had come to some pleasant conclusion about what she was looking at.

I was unable to withdrawn and feel more relaxed and I asked her to take me back to the Center. She wanted to know why and I must have said something that triggered her anger for she uttered a loud and clear "NO!". I still can hear the tone of her voice when she spoke to me.

.

°.°.°.°.°.°.°.

.

"Why do you wanna go back there?" she asked, looking me in the eye.

"I... I don't belong here." I replied softly, feeling shame crawling over my shoulders.

"Where?"

"Here... At your place."

"Why?"

"You have to ask?"

"Yeah. Answer me... why?"

"It's no use. Could you take me back... please?"

"No."

I looked at her. She came and sat on the couch close to me. Her face was only gentleness and smiles now.

"Please, Alexandra. Will you drive me back to the Center?" I almost begged.

"No, I won't, David. I invited you over because I got to know you a little bit during the last few weeks and I want to know you even better. I would like us to be friends."

"Friends?"

"Yeah. Does that surprise you?"

"Huh... I don't understand."

"Friends. You know when two people meet and they like each other and they exchange their impressions on life, their hobbies. They talk about anything, or nothing. Friends, you know." I could feel the gentle mockery in her voice.

"Why me?"

"Why not?"

"Because I'm..."

I could not utter the word.

"You're what?" she went on, so calmly.

Gee, she was not making it easy for me.

"I am not..."

"What?"

I looked at my feet, not able to speak.

"David, look at me." I raised my eyes, so slowly. "I like you, period. Isn't that enough to become friends?"

"Huh... I guess so."

"So?"

Gee, she was enjoying this.

"So what?"

"Tell me, I'm curious, how was your life back in California?"

"Well... I was a cop... and ..."

"I know that already. Sally told me a bit about your background."

"Then what do you wanna know?"

"How was your life outside the job?"

I was not in the mood to talk about the life I had lost.

"What did you do when you were not on duty?"

Okay, she is persistent. What the hell?

"I had fun with my friends, going to the Pits..."

"The Pits?"

"It's a bar, run by Huggy. He's a good friend of ours."

"What about Hutch? You only told me a little about him, but I sense he counts a lot for you. Am I right?"

I kept silent for what seemed like an eternity, trying to remember the echo of Hutch's voice and picture his face in my head. I'd been away for so long and submerged with so much pain, drugs, treatments, by so many people around me. My head was so weary that I was afraid to lose the memory of him because my body was so exhausted.

"Yeah, Hutch is … special to me."

"How special?"

"We're like brothers, soul mates, he is...."

I couldn't go on, almost choking up. I was trying to hold back. I missed him!

Dear God, I hope you keep an eye on my Buddy, for I fear something is about to go wrong with him. I can feel it. And I'm not there to support him. It's a long way from here to there. And here I am, taking my time, while I should be fighting like hell to make it once and for all, and go back and gently kick his ass and make him feel better!

I didn't wanna forget what it's like to be back home, even in this damn wheelchair!

I had go back.

"Alexandra, I really need to go back." I went on, very calmly too.

"To the Center?"

"Yeah, first to the Center... Then to California."

"You want me to book a flight for you tomorrow?" she said with that amused tone she had been playing with me all along.

"What?? ... I meant... not now, but … soon."

"Do we have time at least for a cup of tea?" she said with a mixture of amusement and false anger in her voice.

Gee, I never realized how gorgeous she was when she is angry. Her eyes were glinting and her voice was lower. I felt like she was embracing the whole of me with the sole tone of her voice. Slowly, I tried to relax and let go of the pain, the fear, the anger.

She came closer, knelt in front of me and let her hand on mine. I finally managed to look at her without feeling as if I was about to burst into tears. I even smiled at her.

"That's better." she softly said. "I'll get the tea."

She stood up but before she turned to head to the kitchen, I grabbed hold of her waist and drew her closer to me. All I wanted at that moment was to feel the warmth of her body against my face. Someone to hold on to. To feel safe, if only for a brief moment. She put her arms around my shoulders and I could feel her fingers gently rubbing the back of my neck.

When I looked up, she lowered her face real close to mine and kissed me. Her lips were so soft yet greedy at the same time, exploring my lips and my mouth like no woman had never done before. I held her tight against me. We kissed for a long time, unable to part from each other's embrace. I felt like a fire was starting down in my belly. I could almost dream I was getting to my feet to take her in my arms. Then all of a sudden, reality caught me and I pulled myself away from her lips.

"What's wrong?"

"N-Nothing." I lied.

"Dave. Just take it at it is, for what it is." she said softly and kissed me again.

"What do you think it is?"

"I think it is some good feeling which started the day I first met you and it has been growing ever since. Can't help it. I find you kinda... cute."

I swallowed hard.

"Cute, huh? Like a miserable toy..."

"Shhht." she whispered whilst putting a finger on my lips to seal them and prevent me from uttering more stupid words. "I like you just as you are today. Period."

And she went on kissing me with even more passion.

How could I deserve this? How could a woman like her feel what she seemed to feel for me? How come I, who had always taken the initiative with girlfriends, was now feeling totally helpless and entirely at her mercy? How come I wanted to respond with all my heart to her move. To kiss her and …

Okay, Starsk, snap out of it, man! How do you imagine you can please a fire ball like her? She is fire all right! But your own little spark has been blown out, you know that. So don't even try to pretend to be able to be a ladies man again. Ever.

As if she heard my thoughts, she took my face in her hands and softly whispered in my ear.

"Don't worry, Dave, one step at a time. And I always choose my words very carefully."

Then she stood up again.

"I'm gonna prepare some herbal tea, what do you think?"

I did not reply, I could not, still feeling a bit perplexed and a lot warmer all over than a few minutes ago.

°.°.°.°.°.°.°.

/tbc/