My Second Chance

Chapter VII

=Normal POV=
[Saturday, 3/3/2018; 2:35 pm]
[Berk; Raseri House]

Nobody quite understood what happened, but it was clear as day for them to see the raw emotion on Hayden's face upon seeing these two dogs and one cat come into the room. It was clear that Trayden figured something out about Hayden, and used it to surprise him. And yet; this would explain why Rachel and Dustin told the party-goers Trayden would be back with Hayden soon. At first, no one believed Trayden could do it. However, Trayden did come with Hayden in tow and even got Hayden to agree to stay for the party. Hayden was still sitting back on his knees, the tears falling down from his eyes while the dogs and cat were extremely affectionate with Hayden.

"I-I don't understand," Hayden finally got out, looking at Trayden. "H-How did you-,"

"To be entirely honest; I saw the picture you were looking at on your phone…The one with your parents and the dogs on Monday when I announced my party. Cloudjumper, I think his name is, was a dog mom and dad got from the shelter. We adopted him back in August, but when I saw the picture…It got me wondering if the dog we had was the one from the photo," Trayden said gently, moving next to Hayden now.

"Cl-Cloudjumper was at the shelter?" Hayden panicked.

"All 3 of them were," Rachel said as Hayden looked at her quickly. "Katie's mom and uncle run an animal shelter in Hysteria; these 3 were found together on the streets in August. They were hungry, dirty, and weak,"

"They wouldn't let anyone near them, so animal control was called, and Kelly Grimborn stepped in to take them since they had collars and obviously belonged to someone," Dustin added.

Hayden lets a few more tears slip as he turned around and hugged Trayden tightly, surprising the newly turned eighteen-year-old teenager. Trayden blinked a few times. "Thank you…Thank you so much," he sobbed. "Y-You have no idea wh-what this…means…t-to me," Trayden smiled, and he hugged Hayden back.

"You're welcome. And don't worry; your aunt and uncle already said it was okay for them to stay with you at their house," Trayden informed. Hayden wiped his eyes now, and there was actually a small smile on his face; that was the best sight to see in Trayden's opinion. "Happy birthday, Hayden," he added.

"Thank you…A-And happy birthday to you too, Trayden," Hayden replied as the hug ended and Hayden went back to sitting on the floor, his legs crossed this time as the two dogs came over, each laying their head on his legs while Toothless just curled up in Hayden's lap contently with a yawn.

"So, these were your parents' pets?" Rylee asked.

"Cloudjumper was moms. Skullcrusher was dads; they are wolf-dog hybrids, that's why they are so big. And Toothless is mine; I-I rescued him from the streets; he lost half of his tail…And is missing some teeth, which is why I call him Toothless," Hayden pet the dogs gently. "I saved Toothless when I had just turned 17 last year…And the dogs came into our lives when I was 14,"

This was the most emotion they'd ever seen from Hayden other than his fear and nervousness; it was honestly nice to see Hayden opening up a little bit. Sure, he was emotional, but it seemed like these tears stemmed from joy and shock to be reunited with his parents' dogs and his cat after believing he would never see them again. And more surprising to the friends is that Trayden set all this up for Hayden, so it made them wonder if Trayden like Hayden as perhaps more than a friend. All the friends and even his family knew that Trayden was gay, and had no shame in it, so it wouldn't shock them if he developed feelings for another male, but was Tray feeling something for Hayden? They wanted to know, but now was probably not the best time to ask.

Syrus and Alicia saw something that the others didn't, though. Trayden had been astonishingly protective of Hayden since the Olivia situation. Hell, Trayden was protective when he met Hayden, making the other friends back off and not give Hayden a hard time. Trayden knew about Clinical Depression, Anxiety, and he realized when Hayden was sick. Even going as far as carrying Hayden to Miya's office when Hayden admitted his stomach hurt if he moved from his scrunched up position. The most interesting indicator though was Trayden seeking out Hayden on the 8th of February when Olivia pulled Hayden away and discovering what she was doing to Hayden behind closed doors.

And that must have had an impact on Hayden because Trayden was allowed to physically hold Hayden and offer comfort. Trayden got a full recording, he stepped in and protected Hayden, and even went above calling the police and went straight to dialing his father, Director of Barbarchi Isle Law Enforcement, which meant that Dustin Raseri was the boss of Silas Jorgenson, and Katie and Bryan's father, Vincent Grimborn, who was Chief of Barbarchi Isle Police. Syrus and Alicia were absolutely convinced that Trayden was either developing or had a full-blown crush on Hayden. And all this was going to be interesting because nobody knew if Hayden was gay, or even bisexual at that.

"So, better mood than before?" Trayden asked.

"You have no idea," Hayden looked at him smiling as Trayden returned.

"Than I guess I did good," Trayden chuckled. "You gonna hang for the party?" Hayden nodded to him. "Then we party on!" he called.

. . .

[8:00 pm]

Hayden was actually having a decent time. He still sat off to the side with Cloudjumper, Skullcrusher, and Toothless, but he listened to the music and enjoyed the food. Devon, Miya, and Hailey were still present at the Raseri house because there was a random snowstorm outside and Dustin, with his position as Director of Law Enforcement, wouldn't allow anyone to leave until he knew it would be safe. Currently; there was zero visibility and about freezing outside. Hayden didn't talk to anyone for long; a quick hi and few responses, but he mainly kept to himself with his pets. That was the highlight of his day, and it was a nice feeling to have them back.

A slight joy in his dismal life was having his pets back. Hayden knew he still suffered from depression, and that likely wasn't going away anytime soon given all he'd been through since June 23, 2017; the day his parents were killed. At the moment, Hayden had somehow fallen asleep while sitting on the floor. Hayden was laying against Cloudjumper on his back while Skullcrusher had his head on Hayden's midsection and Toothless remained on Hayden's stomach.

However, it was anything but a peaceful rest as inside; Hayden was having a nightmare about the night his parents died. Hayden's body was shaking, and his head was moving side to side, whimpering a little. "No…No…"

Dustin and Rachel, who were sitting in the living room saw it first and waited to see if Hayden would come out of it on his own. After 5 minutes; the answer was a clear no. Hayden shifted hard as Skullcrusher lifted his head, and Toothless ended up on the floor because of Hayden suddenly jerking and turning onto his side, almost curling up.

"Tray, sweetheart," Rachel said gently as Trayden turned around with a smile.

"Yeah, mom?" Trayden asked, she only managed to point to Hayden's current status on the floor. Syrus and Alicia peered over; then Syrus went closer to Hayden.

"Nightmare," Syrus sighed.

"Could be a flashback," Evan offered.

"Then he'd be awake," Alicia mumbled. "No, it's a nightmare. Syrus and Hayden share the basement for their room; Sy is the one who helps Hayden wake up through the night," she informed. Syrus moved next to Hayden carefully.

"Hayden…Hey, it's alright," Syrus said. Hayden didn't wake up. "Come on, cuz, only a nightmare," he tried again, this time, touching Hayden's arm and shaking him a bit. Still no response. Hayden was sweating, trying to hold himself in the fetal position.

"Hayden, it's okay, wake up now," Alicia attempted next. "How long does it normally take you at home?"

"He's usually up after I shake him," Syrus said. Trayden walked over, crouching down now and petting Skullcrusher's head.

"Wake him up," Trayden told the dog. Skullcrusher got up and moved closer to Hayden, nudging his face, whining, and licking him a bit. Hayden's shaking seemed to lessen a bit, and then Cloudjumper joined in by shifting and pressing his snout to Hayden's cheek. Now, Trayden put his arm on Hayden's shoulder and shook him gently. "Hayden, wake up; everything is okay. Come on back to us," he said. The jerking around ceased, as did the shaking and Hayden unclenched his body. Not long after that, maybe a minute or two, Hayden opened his eyes and saw Trayden in front of him, smiling lightly. "Hey, there you are," he said.

Syrus and Alicia were shocked, but so were the rest of the friends there. How did Trayden manage to get Hayden to wake up when he'd never had to do it before like Alicia and Syrus did? Hayden still looked scared and distraught almost, panting to catch his breath. Out of nowhere, tears welled up in Hayden's green eyes as Trayden put his arm around Hayden's shoulders; then sat back against the couch with his knees up and legs apart.

"Come on," Trayden offered, pulling Hayden in a bit. At first, the others weren't sure what Trayden was doing, but it became clear when Hayden gave into the motion and ended up against Trayden's chest and almost laying between his legs and midsection. Hayden turned his face into Trayden's shirt, gripping it slightly and started crying. Trayden locked his arms around Hayden's arms and used on hand to rub Hayden's shoulder. "Okay. Alright; it's alright, Hayden," he soothed.

For nearly 20 minutes, Hayden just sobbed, but after 15 minutes; it was more like whimpers and sniffling. Trayden didn't move or say anything; he just held Hayden in his arms and let him have his moment. At some point, Miya, Rachel, and Dustin averted everyone's attention to something else, so they weren't all just staring at Trayden and Hayden. Once more; it certainly peaked their interest to find Trayden as the one helping Hayden deal with his nightmares, insecurities, and depression. Not to mention, Trayden went out of his way to retrieve the dogs that belonged to Hayden's parents, and his cat just to see Hayden smile a little and cheer him up.

It was steadily becoming more apparent that Trayden had a crush on Hayden, but now was not the time to confront Trayden about it. Hayden was shaking in Trayden's arms, still crying a bit. "Ssh. Everything is alright," Trayden whispered, rubbing Hayden's back a little.

"I just don't get it," Syrus said to his friends. "Hayden's after-nightmare episodes don't usually last this long,"

"Well, how do they go at home?" Alyssa wondered.

"Short. Hayden wakes up sweating and trying to catch his breath; the light has to be on, or he'll freak out and go into a panic attack. Hayden will cry for a few minutes, take a drink of water, and usually end up going back to sleep. I usually only sit on the edge of the bed and tell him to breathe and relax a little," Syrus stated.

"Do you ever hold him?" Miya asked.

"I rub his back a little, but I don't do what Tray is doing. Hayden doesn't like being restrained; he wigged out on dad once," Syrus informed.

"But even after he's awake and has his episode; you don't just hold him and let him cry it out?" Rachel inquired now. Syrus shook his head.

"I didn't really think he'd like it or it would help. When Hayden wakes up, as Sy said, the light has to be on, and he needs to be able to look around and see where he is. Normally; he continues shaking, or he'll pull his knees up and start rocking back and forth. But he typically won't let anyone hold him. Dad tried once back when Hayden first moved in with us, and Hayden flipped out in a panic attack and the caseworker who came by to check on things advised that we don't do it again," Alicia explained.

"Yeah, it's in the file from the me-," Syrus began as Alicia elbowed him in the stomach, making her older brother wince a bit.

"It's in the file from child services and those who worked with Hayden during his time with them. Doctors, other psychiatrists; if Hayden is held, it'll be a panic attack, or he'll get violent to get free before going into a panic attack after," Alicia mentioned quickly, looking at her brother and telling him with her brown eyes not to bring up Hayden being in the mental hospital.

"So why is Trayden able to hold Hayden and he's not freaking out?" Rylee questioned.

"No clue," Syrus shrugged.

"Any ideas, Rach?" Dustin asked.

"Several, but nothing I will say because it's not my place to," Rachel mentioned.

Dustin looked at her carefully and understood what she was getting at. Even Miya understood what Rachel meant. Trayden had been the one to find and save Hayden from Olivia. Trayden assured Hayden everyone would be okay and that he would be there for him. As a result, Hayden was beginning to understand that Trayden was someone he didn't have to hide his emotions with. Hayden felt comfort with Trayden present, and sometimes more if physical contact was being made since the day with Olivia, Trayden held Hayden through the entire situation.

"Ssh…It was just a nightmare; you're safe now," Trayden comforted. Hayden was sniffling hard and coughing too. Trayden looked up at the group now. "Dex, would get me a water bottle, please?" he asked.

"Sure," Dex, one of Trayden's younger brothers replied. The second eldest, Dex Raseri, came over and handed Trayden the water bottle. Trayden opened it and leaned over a bit, so Hayden to hold the water bottle and take a few sips from it.

"Feel a little better now?" Trayden asked. Hayden nodded once but ended up lying his head back on Trayden's chest and closing his eyes.

"Wh-What time is it?" Hayden asked, shaking still and the tears remained in his eyes. Nobody quite understood what was going on. The panic attack and crying episode ended, so why was Hayden so miserable and panicky almost.

"Little after 8 pm," Evan stated. Hayden sat up quickly, scared.

"I-I need to go home," Hayden said.

"This party is a sleepover," Tyler reminded.

Hayden shook his head. "N-No…I need to go home," he repeated.

"Hey, hey…Easy, what's wrong?" Trayden inquired. Hayden was freaking out, and it didn't make sense why.

"Nobody can leave, Hayden. There's a bit of a snowstorm happening right now, and it's not safe for anyone to drive in. Everyone here is staying put until the storm lightens or stops. If it doesn't; everyone stays overnight," Dustin informed. "I can't risk anyone getting hurt," he added.

"I-I need to get t-to my aunt and uncles…" Hayden said once more, now holding his legs and rocking nervously and scared; he was shaking too. Trayden tried to touch him, but Hayden flinched away. "C-Can't…Do this…"

"Can't do what?" Hailey questioned.

"Need them t-to relax…" Hayden put his head down, still rocking.

"Oh, shit!" Syrus's eyes widened.

"What? What is it?" Katie asked quickly as the friends, and Raseri family noticed how worried Alicia and Syrus were.

"His pills!" Alicia said now. "Gods, we completely forgot about them!"

"What are you talking about?" Trayden pushed now.

"Hayden's on anti-depressants twice a day," Syrus replied. "One at 6 am and the other at 6 pm; they last about twelve hours each…It's two hours past the first dose ending; that's why he's freaking out and so emotional right now,"

"The medication keeps him level, doesn't it?" Rachel asked.

"Yes," Alicia nodded. "They don't improve his mood to be happier or anything, but they help keep him relaxed and less panicky and depressed I guess is the word,"

"How long has he been on them?" Miya inquired.

"I-I don't know; he was on them when he came to us at the end of October…" Syrus stated.

"J-July," Hayden managed. "Mid-July,"

"Hayden, sweetheart…Has it been the same medication and dosage since you started them?" Rachel stepped a bit closer.

"S-Same meds; V-Venla..faxine, but different dose…" Hayden replied.

"Venlafaxine…That's used to treat depression, general anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, and panic disorder…What dose did you start at?" Rachel pushed.

"Th-Thirty-seven and a half…" Hayden responded. "Th-Then to fifty when it wasn't working after a week…"

"And what are you at now?" Rachel questioned.

"Se-Seventy-five si-since ea-early Oc-October…" Hayden kept his forehead on his kneecaps, gripping his arms tighter now and enough to start leaving indents and dragging his nails while crying again.

"Hayden, stop," Rachel ordered. Hayden continued doing it, entirely losing control of himself. "Tray, move," she told him as Trayden quickly moved, not sure what was happening, but he was worried about Hayden. "Miya, give me a hand, please?" Miya came over. "Keep his arms away from one another," Miya sat behind Hayden on the couch and pulled his arms from around his legs and kept them separated.

Hayden started trying to break free, jerking around as Miya held him still. "Easy, Hayden. Easy…" Miya informed.

"You have him?" Rachel asked.

"He's strong, but yes, I have him," Miya nodded as Hayden got one arm free, but Miya ended up grabbing it again.

"Babe, you alright?" Devon asked.

"Not to worry, Dev," Miya assured gently. Rachel went into the kitchen and grabbed her home care bag, then returned and knelt down while grabbing a few things. Rachel got Hayden's arm in her lap, drawing up the sleeve. Instantly, she stopped and stared a moment, then got back to work. Nobody else saw what she did. Rachel drew a liquid into a needle and tapped it a few times before searching for a vein. Once located, Rachel inserted the needle and set it aside. It didn't take more than a minute or two for Hayden's violent motions to cease, and Hayden's eyes closed before his body went limp almost.