Chap. 7-The Word

I had to have been 10 miles away from the Cullens House. Almost to La Push if my calculations were right. I had forgotten about the rib injuries that I had, merely a bruise now. But no matter if it were a bruise or fatal wound, I would still search for her. Her scent was everywhere and almost no where at the same time. Most of the trails were fresh, at least 2 hours old, while others were more then a day old. This was going to take a long time at the speed I was going, but if I wanted a chance at finding her then I would have to scoop the forest inch by inch.

After a few hours of searching I finally remembered something. This was what we did when she wanted to be alone; we would run off into the forest blindly until we found the meadow.

THE MEADOW!!! I thought.

I ran as fast as I could, taking out a few trees along the way. I knew where she was and I was gonna find her. My heart thudded and all of a sudden my knees gave way. I tripped and rolled into a giant oak tree leaving an imprint of my entire body in its truck. I shook off the leaves that feel from the tree top and kept moving faster and faster toward the meadow. I wondered if Edward had been close enough to hear my thoughts and if he was on his way to the meadow like I was. I had to find her first, I had to talk to her.

I could here the flutter of her heart in the distance now, I wasn't to far from her. Once I got past the two clearings that Seth and Emmett had made in one of their old fights, I stopped. I saw the meadow, and I saw her. I phased, threw on the shorts that were tied to my leg, and walked over to her slowly. "You don't have to sneak Jacob, I know your there." She said.

"Man, I thought I was good at stealth." I laughed. She smirked. I sat down next to her and folded my legs. I stared at her for a long minute, wondering exactly what words to start with, then the words finally came to me. "Ness, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel like this. I just didn't want you to do something that you might regret." I said.

"Any decision I make that involves you is the right one." she said, staring up into the sky. "I just thought I was giving you what you wanted by finally making my choice after so long."

"Weather you picked me or not Ness, I wouldn't want you to make a decision base on what someone else wants. I want you to be happy with what you choose." I hadn't known that sincerity was one of my strong points. Trait I picked up from her none the less.

She looked at me for the first time during our entire conversation. "No one knows what I want, not even my father. The same way my mother learned to let him read her mind, I learned to keep him out of some parts of mine."

"I wish I could do that. Instead, I got a journal." we both laughed. Felt good to see her smile again. She lifted her hand to my cheek to show me what she was thinking; to show what she wanted. What I saw was shocking to me. It was us. She visioned us living the way Edward and Bella did, happy. She had these thoughts in her mind for a long time now. I only knew that because of the detail of the image's. Everything stopped and I saw only her again. She caressed my face and kissed me.

"I want you Jacob. That's all I ever wanted." she said. She threw her arms round me and hugged me tighter then she ever has before. Her embrace instantly reminded me of my human Bella. Warm, loving, and completely mine. But this moment, this embrace was better then that. It was more real then anything I had ever felt and it was good that I didn't have to share it with anyone. Not Nahuel, not Edward. I hugged her back, nearly rapping my arms around her twice. She pulled herself closer and I rested my chin on top of her head. Unable to deny what I was feeling, my mind became a mush and my mouth blurted out the words I had been avoiding for so long.

"I love you, Reneesme." I said to her. These were words that had never come out of my mouth in the same sentence before.

She looked at me, astonished that I had actually said that to her. "What did you say?"

"I don't....really know." I paused. "I think I said--I love you."

She hadn't said anything to me yet. That made me worry. Despite the fact that she had said she loved me before, she said nothing at all this time. I bravely spoke the words again, "I do love you Reneesme. Every minute of every hour I think about how much I love you. No matter what may happen, weather you choose to be with me or not, I will love you and I will always be here for you. All I care about is you Reneesme, please remember that."

She finally spoke, "I love you too Jacob. I've always loved you."

"I know." I pulled her face back to look into her eyes; beautiful chocolate brown. "You know what we have to do Remeesme. We have to make sure this is okay." She threw her head back to my chest and held me tighter. "I love you." she said.

"Is that what you've been keeping from me Reneesme?" Edward said. Surprisingly enough, he had a smirk on his face. I jerked around to where him and the others stood. "Why is everyone good at stealth but me?" I said, a little stunned that they were all standing there staring at us.

"'Cause you haven't fought with me yet Jake." Emmett said with a giant grin on his face. Edward walked closer to Nessie and I and she loosened her grip on my waist. Now hanging on to my body with one arm.

"Dad, I'm sorry I ran away. I didn't---" Edward placed his finger in her lips. "No need to explain. I've seen and heard enough."

My eye read over Edwards face as he said those words and all I could see was compassion. He understood what was going on and he had good reason to. I got the impression that he felt the same way Charlie did when he gave Bella away at her wedding. There was nothing he could do to change her mind, he could only let her go. I looked over at the rest of the family and they all had the same look on their face. Bella had a bit more sadness then anything, but she hid it well. As I looked over all the faces I finally realized that there was an empty spot. Nahuel was gone and for some strange reason the picture felt strange to me.

Before I could mutter out the words Edward spoke. "I'll explain later Jacob." The silent conversation between he and Reneesme had ended and he came to stand in front of me. Reneesme dropped her arm from around my waist and she walked over to Esme. They both had the same mimicked smile, then Esme kissed her forehead.

"I'm sorry Jacob. For what I said before. I know that you were just trying to help and I had no right to react the way I did."

"Its okay Ed. I understand." I said, a little nervous of what was gonna come next. "So you and Reneesme, huh? I don't think that was a big shocker to anyone but, as her father I'm still a bit unsure of your motives."he said.

"Motives? Really? Like we haven't been in this position before." An obvious joke on my part but his face seemed to stay serious. "Um..sorry. Well, my motives are pretty much the same as they've always been. I'm here to care for Reneesme and make sure she happy. The same way you care for Bella. I know that I have hurt her, but I'm willing to make it up to her, and you, no matter what that means I would have to do. My life is her hands now Edward. Everything that I am and everything that I want to be is and will always be because of her. Nothing I say will ever change Edward, that's a guarantee."

"Guarantee? Are you sure you can guarantee that?"

"I promise that. No matter what." I said. Unable to keep it from inching its way threw my teeth without the slight aggression that lingered behind my words. Edward nodded his head at me, and smirked. The crocked smile that I loved to see on Reneesme's face was now imprinted on his. A little weird to know that the smile still had the same effect on me even when he did it. I smiled back, wishing that I wouldn't though. He laughed, feeling exactly how uncomfortable I was about smiling back at his laughed louder and I laughed with him now. Shacking off the uncomfortable feeling and now feeling like I was truly home, like I truly belonged with them. We walked over to the others, my family, and my eyes immediately shot to Jasper. He smiled and nodded. He made me really at ease again for the second time." Thanks." I said.

I had phased and we were now walking back to the house. Well, walking as normal as it was to us. Reneesme was in the depths of my back, sleeping none the less. Once we were all together we all seemed a lot happier then usual. Rosalie even smiled at me for a split second. Everyone had noticed, but pretended not to just for the sake of their own safety. I was happy that I was going to finally be able to sleep comfortably knowing that now Reneesme was mines. We were close to the path now and Edward offered to take Reneesme to the house so that I could get some rest, but every attempt Edward made at taking her was a failed one. She grabbed onto my fur and held on for dear life. I don't think she want to let me go Edward I thought. I heard the low grumble that came from his chest and all I could do was snicker silently. He pulled a bit at my fur because of the low laugh I let out, but he knew she wasn't going to move.

Edward, I'll take her to my house and lay her in Seth's room. I thought

"Fine." he said aggravated. His eye brows pulled together and he pumped down from my back. He muttered words to fast for me to pick up to the others. They all looked at me and cocked their heads. I guessed that he told them she say staying with me tonight and that made everyone a little uneasy. They all shot out of view and I walked slowly to my little shack. I hadn't noticed before that my phased body couldn't fit through the front door. I didn't know what I was gonna do about this because I had no more shorts on me and walking with her in my arms with no clothes on wasn't that much of an option. I had no other choice then. I jerked my body and she went flying off my back onto the ground.

"OUCH! Why did you drop me?" she said. I sat down and looked down at my body. She surged, not exactly getting what I meant. I stood up and shook my back leg at her. "Oohh." she said. She smiled at me and I smiled back. I gave her my fur to help her up off the ground. When she stood, she kissed my mussel and walked into the house. Go to Seth's room. I'll be there in a minute I thought. I phased and grabbed the mat that laid at the front door. I ran into my room and closed the door hoping she hadn't saw me and just went into Seth's room like I said.

"Wow. I've never seen that side of you before Jacob." Reneesme said from behind me. I turned around and she was under the covers of my bed. I guessed she was referring to me mooning her being that the mat couldn't rap around my entire waist.

"Under the covers Nessie!" I said to her, with aggression surprisingly enough. She ducked her head under as I said and I threw the mat to the floor and jumped into some near by shorts. "I thought I told you to go to Seth's room."

"Can I take my head out from under the covers now?" she said. "Yes. Now why didn't you go to Seth's room like I said?"

"You never told me that." Wait a second, I didn't say it.

"I thought it." I said then dropped my head to my hand. "Sorry."

"It's okay. I don't think I would of gone in there anyways. Its really messy." Well that was true. I had been asking him to clean it since the last time he, Paul, and Quil had their video game tournament here. It smelled like rotted cheese and arm pits.

"Then go stay in Leah's room." I said hesitantly.

"Sure. I'll go stay in there and have her rip my head off when she comes home." Yeah, I wouldn't want that to happen. Guess she was using every excuse that would make me give in. I sighed. "Fine then. Stay there. I'll sleep down here." I pointed to the bottom of the bed and walked over to the corner of my room to grab a sheet. I laid across the bottom of the bed, my feet almost touching the floor, and threw the sheet over my body. I slowly felt the weight of the bed shift and before I knew it Reneesme was under the sheet with me, laying on my chest.

"Why are you down here Reneesme?" I asked her. "Wouldn't you want to have the whole bed to yourself and not want to take up the little space that I have."

"Your a lot more comfortable then the bed Jacob. Besides, your mine now and I don't to be apart from you. Not even for a second." she said. The flutter of her heart slowed as she spoke those words. I could feel the slight chill of her skin on my chest and I pulled her closer to me; my arms wrapped around her body. She reached her hand up to my face and stroked my cheek. I moved my thumb up and down the skin of her shoulder and the feel of her goose bumps gave me chills. She reached her face to mines and we were kissing again. Her body became hot and I let her go slightly. That gesture of slightly letting go made her body come closer to mines more then ever before. She was laying on top of me now and every inch of her was touching my body. My hand laid flat on the floor as I tried to keep us from falling and me crushing her by sheer force of my body. I managed to move the both of us to the center of the bed as this intense moment got even more climatic. She pulled her face from mines and her shirt went over her head. I had never notice that Reneesme had actually grown------girly parts. My heart stop once my eyes met her fully developed body and all I could say way.

"Jesus Christ."

She covered her breast with her hands. "Too much?" All I could do was shack my head no and we continued kissing. No matter how into this moment I was, my ears were still on high alert. The Cullen's house was dead silent except for the huffing of two people. I guessed that they could all hear what was going on right now; and I imagined that they all knew what was suppose to happen next. If I knew that our first time wasn't going to be as private as I would want it to be, then I would stopped this a long time ago. The sudden sound of shuffling feet at the house let me know that we did have an audience. As uncomfortable as I was, I couldn't force myself to stop. Our clothes were off and there was no turning back now. I had to give her what she wanted; what we wanted. She was laying under me now and her kiss was as strong as ever; the softest strength I had ever felt. Each time my face pulled away, she was there to pull it back. It seemed as if there was no escape from her lips and me trying would simply lead to failure. I finally pulled away long enough to look at her and ask her, "Reneesme. Are you sure you want this now? Are you sure your ready?" I had to make sure that she wasn't just doing this because of my feelings. I cared about hers and right now, that's all that mattered to me. "Yes, Jacob. I am ready." she said.

As time went by the pain had gone from her face and all that was left was the pure pleasure of our entwined bodies. She constantly let out mounes and screams from my inward motions and all I could do was try to make my heart beat again. The feeling of being this close, this intimate with her was pleasure within itself. Her fingers clawed at my back and my body boiled with satisfaction. It was as if I was truly seeing her for the first time.

Her eyes. They would lock onto my face and close together tightly as my motions became more fluent. When the chocolate brown would tear, I would kiss it away.

Her skin. Moist with sweat but still as soft as ever. I smell it, I kiss it gently and treasure every inch of this natural wonder.

Her mouth. Almost no words could describe it. It was the music to the slow dance. It sung songs that the great musicians would never be able to produce.

Her hands. They tracked back and forth on my skin like a blind man itching to see.

Her body. The center piece of this beautiful moment. It trembled and I would kiss it to a stop. Its warmth was like home to me and I never wanted to leave. I had not deserved such perfection and yet I had it. Not to share, not to give away. Her body was mine and mine was hers, always.

My heart began to beat again as she began to scream. I looked to her face to see if she was in pain, to see if she had been hurt in anyway. Her face was contorted and her mouth was wide. I had never heard my name sound so beautiful before. As she got louder my heart beat faster and my breathing got wild. In an instant everything got quite and both our hearts stopped. My body thrashed lightly then everything came to a halt. I was breathing again though my heart still had a mind of its own. The flutter of her heart had not reganded its usual speed yet and that made me worry.

"Are you okay?" I said. Now my eyes were more focused on her then ever. Nothing in the world was more perfect then the way she was right now. Nothing in the world will ever be as perfect as she is.

"Yes." she breathed softly. She wiped the stray hairs from her face and smiled. I placed my hand between her breast to feel her heart beat; it sped up to its normal speed when I did that. She was fine and I could think again. I rolled off of her to my back and let the trimmers rumble through my bones. I had not expected the ending to be so weird for me. I laid next to her staring at the sealing as my bones shook. I turned my face to look at her and she rolled on her side to look at me at the same time. We had no clue what to say to each other now. Do I say thank you? Do I just walk away? Do we smoke a cigarette?

"I love you, Jacob." she said breaking my thoughts. "I love you too, Reneesme."

"Why don't call me Nessie anymore?"

I hadn't realized that I started calling her by her real name. "Oh. I don't know. I didn't really notice." I said to her as even as possible. I was still in the state of trying to stop trimmers.

"I like it better when you call me Nessie. I feel like I'm unique to you when you call me that." She moved closer to me and laid her head on my chest. My bones came to a stop and I rapped my arms around her. We laid there in silence for atleast 20 minutes until she finally fell asleep. I pulled her away and laid her head on the pillow next to me. I kissed her on the forehead and got out of bed. I searched my room looking for any clothes that I might be able to throw on. All I found was a pair of dirt covered shorts and a gray tank top. I threw them on, kissed Nessie, then walked out the door.

"Wow. It's dawn."