This chapter is dedicated to Chiasmus! (On the lower side of my estimation, but still in it! Now I can sleep. I'm so tired.)


Binge Eater

Chapter Seven: Reflection


Kaneki was reading a book as he drank and relaxed in Anteiku.

"Excuse me?"

Huh? Was someone talking to him? Kaneki looked up from his book to see the girl he almost bumped into a few weeks ago. He had begun to notice her in Anteiku too for the past few weeks. She read too.

But the fact that she was talking to him…

It was surreal.

He suddenly felt very flustered. Whether it was because she was a girl or he was simply unused to talking to people (or both) he couldn't be quite sure as his emotions scattered.

"Y-yes?" He could feel the heat rise to his cheeks, but the girl didn't comment on that.

"Do you mind if I sit with you?"

Kaneki noticed that there was plenty of empty space in the shop. It wasn't from necessity. The girl wanted to sit with him.

"O-of course."

Tōka looked at the scene with narrowed eyes.

.

Anteiku had become Rize's new coffee shop choice. Though, she couldn't be sure if it was for the coffee or the enjoyment of knowing.

Kirishima had taken habit of keeping an eye on her. It was clear that the teen didn't trust her. Rize understood. But it was because of the teen's suspicion that Rize had fun with her. She would often greet the waitress or wave at her with an innocent smile whenever she was working as if they were long-time friends. The familiarity irked Kirishima, but that was what was so fun about it.

The manager had also offered her up for coffee on one occasion but she rejected the offer. She didn't want to have the conversation he probably wanted to have. Rize had been tempted, though. What if he knew Eto's whereabouts or knew about the situation more than he let on. Perhaps not about particular details, but any tips were welcomed right about now.

Hmmm. Perhaps she would have to take up his offer if he ever asked her again.

Today was no different. It was the weekend, so, once again, Rize could feel the Kirishima girl's stare on her. She wondered how the waitress would react if she thought she was using the shop as a new place to pick up food.

Rize ignored her normal seat and asked to sit down with Kaneki. He seemed flustered enough. When he finally said she could sit with him, she pulled out the chair and sat down across from him. "I'm Kamishiro Rize."

"Nice to meet you Rize-san. I'm Kaneki Ken."

They made brief, idle conversation. Partly because Kaneki seemed to be tripping over his words (not a surprised since it took him six months originally to talk to the other Rize), and also because it was technically their first meeting. It wasn't likely to lead to an in depth conversation.

Rize eyed the boy. He had a small frame, had problems starting conversation, and was a closed-in person. He didn't have the greatest life, but it was relatively peaceful.

He wasn't an exciting person. She understood that. Still, she could never understand what so many fans thought wrong with this Kaneki. Sure is was a psychological and tragic story but in general there was nothing wrong with this type of person.

Was it because they liked the white hair Kaneki better (which I should remind them that was only white from the severe stress of torture)? If that was the case did his fans like to see him in pain? To suffer? Probably. That's just how cruel they were. To see someone emotionally damage. To see someone willing to hurt another. How many of them have comfy lives? Would they trade places? Of course they wouldn't.

Then there were those that claimed this Kaneki was a wimp. That he should just get over his humanity and eat people since it was "his only choice".

People disgusted Rize.

Then there were those who criticized him for ultimately accomplishing nothing. Unfortunately, that was just a sad fact of life. Most people never truly accomplished anything as they went about trying to get by in life. It wasn't nothing. It was life.

Rize could remember feeling connected to a protagonist in the longest time when she read about Kaneki. An endless circle of things going against you. Feeling you don't belong with others. Psychological problems out of our control. The will to not do something even if it's for the "best".

"Who's your favourite author?" Of course the topic changed to books. She should have expected it. No, Rize had expected it.

"Hmm…" She put on her thinking face. She already knew her answer though. She didn't have a favourite author. She didn't prioritize such things. Favourite authors, favourite books, favourite colour, favourite food… it just seemed so trivial. There were things she liked. Things she disliked. Things that annoyed and frustrate her. Things like love, hate, favourite, absolute were things that she did not understand. "I'm afraid I don't have one." She could have lied. If she said Takatsuki Sen, she was sure to win points with him. There wasn't really a point in that, though.

"You…don't have one?" For someone whose life was surrounded by novels, he didn't understand how a fellow reader couldn't have one.

"I'm afraid not. I'll admit that there are certain authors I'm more particular to, but I'm hesitant to call them my favourite."

"Is that so?" Kaneki took a sip of his drink. "What do you think of Takatsuki Sen? She's my favourite author."

"She is popular isn't she?" Rize smile in amusement. "But well deserved even if I think many overlook the deep complexity of her stories." Kaneki's expression brightened, happy that Rize shared his opinion about Takatsuki's books and liked his favourite author too.

"They are aren't they?"

"Speaking of Takatsuki-san, did you know about the manager of this shop?"

Kaneki looked confused. "The manager?"

"Did you know? He's actually Takatsuki's father."

"Is he really?" He looked over to the counter but the old man wasn't there.

"It's too bad really. I've never seen her here. It's still a nice shop, though, so I still like coming here."

Kaneki had hoped he would get to see Takatsuki one day, but the chance was still slim. After all, how often did people visit their family at work? He supposed it made sense that he hadn't seen her.

.

Kaneki was happy to continue to talk to Rize on occasion whenever they met up. They had spoken on ten occasions now and he was becoming more comfortable around her.

He wondered if she would oppose exchanging phone numbers or hanging out somewhere else besides Anteiku, but if not Anteiku was still nice.

"Yo Kaneki. You're spacing out."

Kaneki blinked as a hand was waved in front of his face. "Sorry Hide, I wasn't listening."

"Geez. What has you so out of it?"

"I met someone."

"Eh?" Hide was a lot louder than he had to be. Was it really something to make that big of a commotion about. "You have a girlfriend? I don't even have one."

Kaneki blushed and raised his hands. "It's not like that. We're just friends." One of his hands raised higher to cover his chin. Something Hide took obvious notice of.

"Right." Hide rested his head against his raised, crossed arms.

"I'm serious." Kaneki's blush was still ever present. "She likes the same kind of books as I do."

"Books? Sounds boring. Where did you meet her? Is she pretty?"

Kaneki's blush died down but didn't disappear since he was being interrogated. "I met her at Anteiku."

"The coffee shop you go to?" Hide never went with him, but he wasn't Kaneki's best friend for no reason. Being observant helped too. "And you didn't tell me… Is she pretty?"

Kaneki's blush intensified as he shouted Hide's name. He knew he was only trying to tease him.

"Ah. Maybe I should come with you. Then I can meet this mysterious friend of yours."

"I'm serious Hide. We're only friends."

"Right. Right," said Hide waving the brunet off. He couldn't help but be curious of Kaneki's friends. He didn't mean it the wrong way, but Kaneki wasn't exactly a people person. Besides, as his best friend, he needed to make sure his friend was in good hands when he wasn't there.

.

It was amusing how Kirishima was still highly suspicious of her. More so for the fact that Kaneki was still alive. The situation must have been a mental rubix cube to her, in which she couldn't complete. Since she and Kaneki met up on the weekends, she saw plenty of Rabbit-san. After all, those were open availability days for her.

The bell rang as the door opened and Rize looked in the direction.

Rize tilted her head when Kaneki came in with someone.

She involuntarily tensed.

Nagachika Hideyoshi.

In her past life, Hide had been one of her three favourite human characters along with Jūzo and Seido. Also easily within her top 5 characters of the series in which she couldn't properly order.

But that wasn't what bugged her.

Kaneki would have been in her top five and that was a fictional world.

However, just because it was fictional, didn't mean the personalities were any different now that she was here.

No. She froze for another reason. She didn't want to freeze, but her subconscious didn't know how to react.

It wasn't even fear. Hide was observant sure, but what could he do to her that others haven't already tried.

No. It was the fact that his character—now this person—always reminded her of someone. If Kaneki largely reminded Rize of her past self then Hide would have represented her past sister. The sister who understood her without trying. The only one whose connection stuck with her and allowed her to keep living—and the statement was far from an exaggeration. If anything, it was probably an understatement. All he needed was Kaneki's intelligence and love for books and then they would be infinitely similar.

She couldn't think about that thought.

She couldn't think about then.

She shouldn't think about then.

She shouldn't think about her.

Rize wanted to shake the cold, empty feeling off, but it kept persisting.

"Hello, Kaneki-kun."

"Hi Rize-san. Sorry about Hide. He suddenly wanted to come with me."

"Oi. Oi. You're making me feel like I'm not wanted here. But seriously, Kaneki? This her?" Hide stared at Rize for a moment and Kaneki was nervous. He didn't need approval but it would be nice if he supported him. "Say," the blond directed his comment to Rize, not shy in the least. "Why him? He's way out of your league."

Kaneki blushed. "Hide!"

Hide seemed to notice the tenseness and hollowness of Rize's eyes. Also the fact as she hadn't said anything since her greeting to Kaneki. Then she blinked and loosened. He didn't know what happened but he could tell those eyes he had previously seen were haunted and lonely.

"Don't worry about bringing a friend." She switched her gaze from Kaneki to Hide. "I'm Kamishiro Rize. It's nice to meet you Nagachika-san." Hide blinked at the use of his name. He hadn't gave it yet and Kaneki only called him Hide. Rize smiled knowingly. "Kaneki's talked about you before." Hide turned to Kaneki, who was in the midst of sitting down scratching his cheek nervously.

Hide pulled out a chair. "All good I hope."

Rize smiled mischievously. "Maybe."

"Kaneki! What did you tell her?"

Kaneki grinned a little at the lightheartedness. It was nice to be all together. "I wonder." If Hide could tease him, he would tease him back. Or attempt to.

The ordered their drinks and began to chat. When their drinks arrived, Hide noticed how dark Rize's drink was. "Is that black?"

"Yes." She took a sip. She still didn't know why some were obsessed with the drink. She would admit that sometimes it was better to have a thinner drink than blood or her shakes, but it wasn't savoury—but she thought that about everything, so maybe it was just her.

"Isn't that bitter?"

"Not at all. Well perhaps." She remembered drinking coffee in her past life. As much as she wanted to leave that part behind her, it was the most convenient to interact with others. She hadn't been a fan of coffee for the longest time. She eventually got used to the taste but that was only with cream and sugar. It still tasted off but she only drank it for the caffeine back then. "Fortunately or unfortunately, you get used to the taste. I used to put cream and sugar in to disguise the taste. I like it now, though."

"I'll never switch from my cappuccino."

Rize and Kaneki laughed as Hide actually protected his cup as if one of them would steal it.

They continued to talk and somehow Rize survived the meeting.