Summer Girl
Chapter Six

Hello Upper East Siders, GG here.

And, boy, do I have news.

B and J went on a date at one of the top restaurants for fine dining last night—and who did they find there but the handsome E, treating his cousin, N, out for dinner and bonding time.

Sad part is, I don't think poor B knew N was just a cousin. I mean, there were definitely some envious looks thrown around there—even a few from J!

But the main point here is this: what is N up to? She can't be in the city for no reason; everyone knows N prefers to hang around on the outskirts. She is by no means an Upper East Sider.

She's got something up the sleeve of her cheap band T-shirt, that's for sure.

xoxo,

Gossip Girl

Well after Edward and Nessie had already vacated their booth, Jake was still staring across the room with a thoughtful look on his face. I sighed and dropped my fork on my plate with a clatter.

"We should just go," I said.

Jake didn't protest, merely setting down his own cutlery and waving a random waiter over to ask him to bring the bill. We sat in silence until our waitress came back over and handed the check to Jacob, winking noticeably at him and sashaying away. I knew I should feel defensive over my boyfriend, but I didn't. I let him leave the cash tucked in the black folder while I gathered up my purse and pulled on my coat.

Jake hooked his arm into mine as we stepped out into the frigid air and led me toward his car.

"So," I began, feeling uncomfortable in the very loud silence, "did we have the peaceful dinner you were expecting?"

Jake was quiet for a minute, staring straight ahead with his lips pressed tightly together. I watched his face, attempting not to start hyperventilating from anxiety.

Finally, he glanced down at me. "It was pretty peaceful. Just not..." He took a deep breath in and looked ahead again.

"Not what?" I pressed.

"Not how I was expecting," he finished.

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that there were a few imposing... emotions," he muttered.

We were now standing next to his car and he had dropped his hold on my arm. I furrowed my eyebrows at him. "What do you mean?" I repeated.

"For God's sake, Bella! How naive can you get?"

I stared at him blankly. "Maybe we should take a break," I blurted out.

Now he was staring blankly at me. "Where did that come from?"

"I don't know," I mumbled, shrugging.

"You want to break up just because I said you were naive?"

"No!" I protested. "I don't want to break up with you at all."

The blank look became blanker.

I looked around the street wildly, my eyes resting on Jake's driver standing just behind him, his hand on the car door. His face was stoic and professional, but I knew an act when I saw one. He was probably pretty damn amused.

"What I mean is," I stammered, pulling my eyes back to Jacob's face, "uh, you've been acting distant lately. Or I have. Whatever. Both constitute needing to, you know, take a break. Because then in our time apart we can realize our love all over again and have one of those fairy tale sappy shit moments where we run into each other's arms and sob over how much we missed each other..."

"Okay," Jacob said, a small smirk on his face. "If that's what you want."

I nodded and Jake motioned for the driver to open the door for him. I watched him start to get in, wrapping my arms around myself and shivering.

Jake looked back at me. "See you around, Bella," he said softly, waving. I nodded again.

He disappeared from view and the driver closed the door, shooting a sympathetic smile in my direction before going around to the other side of the car.

The reflections of the streetlights on the shiny black car flashed as it pulled out of its parking spot, leaving me staring down the busy street after it, still absentmindedly nodding, as if trying to convince myself that I'd done the right thing.

"Well, that was rather stupid of you, wasn't it?" a familiar voice said from behind me. I whipped around to see Edward's cousin standing behind me.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

She smirked, tossing her dark red hair over her shoulder. "It was a bad idea for you to break up with that boy, for the simple reasons that a, he's hot sex, and b, you now have no ride home."

I blinked. "I didn't break up with him."

She snorted. "You did so. Just because you called it taking a break doesn't mean it wasn't breaking up. You may notice that both terms have the word 'break' in them."

Just then my phone vibrated, and, grateful for the distraction from Nessie, I dug it out of my purse to find a text from the Gossip Girl website.

The message read Goodbye for good? with a camera phone snapshot of Jacob waving at me as he got in his car. I snapped my phone shut, fuming. I looked up to see Nessie appraising her own cell phone.

"Word travels fast," she commented, putting her phone back in her purse.

I nodded indifferently, looking around the street as if I would be able to find whoever it was that sent in that tip.

"So," Nessie said, "I'm heading home. Do you want a ride?"

"Is Edward with you?" I asked, suspicious.

"No, he went home in a different car. He left that one"—she pointed toward a car three spaces down—"for me."

"Why didn't he just drop you off?"

"I live in the opposite direction of him," she explained, starting to walk toward her—at least for the night—car. "But I'm willing to make a detour for you," Nessie added, opening the car door and gesturing for me to get in.

I obliged, if only because I didn't have any better options.

We rode in silence for the first few minutes. Nessie seemed to be attempting—and not exactly failing—to stare me down from directly across from me. I avoided her looks, pretending to be looking out the window.

Nessie sighed loudly. "You're hot for Edward, aren't you?"

I snapped my head toward her, blinking rapidly. "Wha—"

"Oh, don't give me that," she snapped, cutting my reply off. "I saw the way you looked at him. And frankly, I don't think you're good enough for him." She sat back in her seat, crossing her arms and glaring at me.

I spluttered, trying to figure out what I was supposed to say to that. Who did she think she was, talking to me like that? I'm Bella fucking Swan for fuck's sake!

"Listen here, girly. Who are you to say what's good for Edward and what's not? Wouldn't you think that would be his call?"

"I'm his cousin," Nessie said coolly. "I'm allowed to judge for him what he's not capable of judging for himself."

The car rolled to a stop and I looked out to see that we were in front of my building. I made to get out, but Nessie grabbed my arm.

"By the way, you just admitted that you like him." She smirked and let my arm go, slamming the car door behind me.

I stood on the sidewalk and watched yet another black car flash into the never ceasing traffic of Manhattan, leaving me behind for the second time that night. It seemed it was always me that was being left alone, as if I didn't have enough of something to be able to keep up with the rest of the world.

Or maybe they were just going full speed ahead while I was content to live in the past.

~*~

The next day I woke, showered, and dragged my ass into the car for the ride to Constance only semi-coherent, having spent most of the night lying in bed, contemplating the events of last night. After all that thinking, I was definitely not anticipating this school day. I knew everyone would be talking about what had happened last night, thanks to that fucker of a site. I also knew that their theories would be ten times worse than my own.

The fact that I had to think up theories for what was going on in my own life said something.

Alice and Rosalie greeted me in the usual spot. Alice was as energetic as ever, while Rosalie was as standoffish as always.

"So, spill," Alice demanded immediately.

I sighed. "There's nothing to spill that hasn't already been dumped out all over the city's population."

Rose snorted. "I don't care what the stupid gossip site says, I want your version." Alice nodded feverishly.

So I told them what had happened, from seeing Edward and Nessie to taking a break to the confrontation with Nessie. When I was finished, all they could do was stare at me.

"I think you're screwed," Rose said flatly.

I groaned.

"No, no," Alice jumped in. "Who cares if Nessie knows you like Edward? It's not like you don't. I say you go after Edward."

"I'm still dating Jake," I pointed out.

"No, honey, you're not," Rose said gently. "Not officially, anyway. You're taking a break. That means you're free to play the field."

"Yeah, like that saying where if you love something, you let it free and if it comes back it's yours. That's what you're doing here," Alice piped.

I sighed. "Whatever. I'm going to class." As if on cue, the bell rang and I started up the steps.

"Call him!" Rose yelled after me.

"Soon!" Alice added.

I ignored them, along with the murmurs in the hallway that ceased when I passed. By the time I slumped into my desk, I knew the day was shaping up to be exactly what I had expected.

My morning classes went by quickly, punctuated by many glares directed by me at little freshmen discussing my love life.

It was the first class after lunch that ruined my relative composure.

Or rather, it was Jessica Stanley and Lauren Mallory, two complete airheads that happened to sit in front of me in the said class that did it.

"I bet she's totally in love with him," Lauren was saying as I sat down.

"Oh, she is. Too bad she's too much of an idiot to do anything about it," Jessica replied.

I wondered if they knew or cared that I was sitting behind them, obviously listening in.

"It's such a shame. If I thought I had a chance with that boy, I'd be all over him."

You'd be all over him if he ever came within sight of you, regardless of whether you had a chance, I thought.

Jessica nodded. "Wouldn't anyone? Well... obviously not her."

"I can't believe she ended it with Jacob, either! She had him wrapped around her finger."

"I guess once you cheat you can't exactly go back to what you had before," Jessica mused.

I couldn't take it anymore. "Would you two mind shutting the fuck up?" I whispered. "I can't hear the teacher."

They glanced at me and rolled their eyes. "Insecure," Lauren said in an undertone.

"Be quiet!" I shrieked.

The entire classroom fell silent and I looked around to see that I had inadvertently ended up on my feet, my hands pressed firmly against my desktop.

"Is there a problem?" the teacher asked me.

"Yeah, these two bitches sitting in front of me can't be bothered to shut the fuck up about me."

There was a collective gasp from the class and the teacher looked shocked for a moment before saying, "Ms Swan, I would like you to leave my class. This is no place for such language."

"Fine." I picked up my books and started for the door.

Just before I left, the teacher spoke again. "I think the office would be appropriate. Take this with you." She scribbled something down on a pink paper and handed it to me. I took it and then waved a hand at her dismissively and closed the door heavily behind me. I strode down the hallway, the sound of my footsteps echoing.

I arrived at the office and, not bothering to check in with the secretary, Mrs Cope, plopped down in one of the comfortable black chairs in the waiting room.

I sat there staring at my feet, which were decked out in gray and black Coach tennis shoes.

"Ms Swan?" Mrs Cope asked from behind her desk. "What are you doing here?"

"Kicked out of class," I mumbled.

"Well, go on in and talk to the principal," she said, her tone one of pity. I stood up and glared at her, wondering how much she knew. She probably followed Gossip Girl in order to feel like a student when it was definitely way past her time.

I stepped into the principal's office, closing the door quietly behind me. I stood and watched the principal stare blankly at his computer screen. I contemplated seeing how long I could stand here before he noticed me, but decided that I didn't like the thought of standing here forever and cleared my throat loudly.

His reaction was immediate and comical, his head snapping toward me as he jumped in his seat. "Ms Swan! To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"The comments of two not so pleasant girls and my dirty mouth," I responded, handing him the pink slip.

He appraised it and sighed. "This is a conservative school, my dear, and your actions are not exemplary like I would hope from you. Do you understand?"

I fought the urge to roll my eyes. "Yes, sir."

"I'm going to have to give you detention for the rest of the week." I shrugged as I watched him start rifling around in the pile of papers on his desk, looking for something. "Excuse me, I need to go get a paper to fill out and have you sign." He got up and disappeared into a room behind his office. I wondered idly to myself if he realized that it was Thursday, which meant I'd only have one day of detention, two if today counted.

An idea sparked in my brain, and I leaned forward in my seat. The principal was nowhere to be seen, so I quickly got up and left the room, closing the door as quietly as I had when I came in. I waved good bye to Mrs Cope and hightailed it out of the school.

I figured I wouldn't get in any more trouble than I already had, since the principal liked my family, so I wasn't too worried about getting caught, anyway. I wandered down the street, not heading anywhere in particular.

Soon enough I found myself at the end of the sidewalk with an expanse of grass and trees in front of me. I kept going, cursing myself for not bringing a coat to school that morning.

The farther I got into the trees, the quieter it got, the noise of the traffic fading with distance. There was still the noise of the people in the park, but it was much more serene. It was a nice change from the general business that occupied my life.

I sat down on a park bench, and, with nothing else to occupy my thoughts, began to think of what Lauren and Jessica had said. Mostly I was just pissed at them because it was none of their fucking business, but could part of what they said have some truth? Was it true that since I had cheated on Jake with Edward, I couldn't go back to what it had been like before?

I supposed it was. That was the trouble. If it was possible to go back to how it had been, it would only be with the total exclusion of Edward from my life. Of course, that wasn't an option now.

It always came down to one fact: if Edward had kept his promise of never seeing me again, my life would be perfectly normal.

That was why he was such an asshole.

Also because he wouldn't tell me anything other than what everyone knew.

And what everyone already knew was not what Bella fucking Swan wanted to know.

I sighed and decided it made my head hurt too much to think about Edward. I got up off the bench and continued walking down the path.

I was almost to the other side of the park—I could see the street at the end of the trees—after a pleasant few minutes thinking of nothing but the cool air and trees surrounding me when Edward's face popped into my head, along with the realization that something smelled really good.

I pushed Edward's face out, not pausing to admire the bright sparkle of his green eyes and shiny hair—okay, I paused—and concentrated on finding the source of the smell. I had discovered that I was insanely hungry.

I finally found the source, a classic hot dog stand just a few yards from the trail I had been following. I ordered one for myself and went to dig out some money to pay for it.

Except I didn't have anything to dig it out of.

Because my purse which had my wallet and thus my money in it was back at the school, no doubt sitting in the office next to the nice black chair I had been sitting in.

Smooth move, Bella, I thought to myself as I shook my head at the hot dog vendor and walked away.

What a lovely, classic fuck my life moment to add to my lovely, classic fucked up life.


...I apologize for the wait.

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