Poker Faces

Chapter Seven: Question Mark

Disclaimer: I don't own this. C'mon people.

Summary: She hates change. He stays the same. She's lonely. He likes the company. She wants to keep a secret. He'd never tell. It's completely perfect, until something unexpected happens… L/L

A/N: Thanks so much for all the reviews, guys. It makes this whole grounding thing a lot less boring, and I really, really, really appreciate it.


"Mom?" Rory asked, from beside her. They hadn't said anything since Rory came into the room.

"Go to bed." Lorelai whispered.

"I'll stay." Rory replied, simply.

"No, hun, I'm fine. I don't even know why I'm crying." She said, wiping away the tears on her face. "I just hate that I messed everything up for you."

"You didn't mess anything up for me." Rory told her.

"The kids at school…"

"Don't worry about it." Rory told her.

"He's your teacher." Lorelai said.

"Mom, it's fine. I want you to be happy."

"I know." Lorelai said. "But you have school tomorrow. Go to bed."

"I'll stay." Rory repeated.

"Rory, I'm fine."

"Are you sure? I don't mind."

"Yeah, hun, go to bed." Lorelai told her.

She left reluctantly, but Lorelai finally persuaded her to go to bed.

She let out a huge sigh, and stared at the ceiling.

She liked him. She really did.

He made her happy. He made her laugh. He laughed at her jokes, even though she knew he didn't understand them. He was nice to Rory, and Rory liked him. He was smart. He gave her a book.

But she gave it back.

They weren't right. Rory was getting attached, and they weren't right. She was having fun. She was enjoying him company. But, they weren't meant to be.

Maybe snow was wrong sometimes. Or maybe it had been trying to tell her something else. Either way, her and Max Medina weren't supposed to be together. If they were, things would have been different, right? She wouldn't have cared if Rory was getting attached. She would have let him stay over. She would have let him in. She would have felt different.

She wasn't sure why she had been crying.

Maybe it was because she was stupid. She was stupid to have gone out with Rory's teacher. Maybe she was just sad. She was sad that another one of her relationships had failed. She was sad that she still hadn't found the guy yet. Maybe she felt something for Mr. Medina. She just didn't feel enough.

Either way, she had cried. She cried. She let it out. But now, it was done. That was it. Her and Max were done. How could they get back together? They'd never be able to fix their problem. They'd never be able to work it out. And she wasn't even sure if she wanted to get back with Max.

All she could think about was Luke.

She should tell him, shouldn't she? She should tell him that she was single again, right? Would he want to know?

Things had been sort of different between them since she had gone out with Max. She wasn't sure what it was. She wasn't sure what exactly happened, or if things would be OK. But she was sure that something had change.

Change. Great. That was just about her favorite thing in the world.

They had agreed things wouldn't change. They agreed.

So, what happened?

She wasn't sure. Things just seemed off. But why?

She wondered what Luke would say when she told him. She wondered if he'd be happy, or if he would even care. She wondered if things would go back to how they were before. She wondered if they be only friends, or if they'd be… what they were before Max. She wondered if things would be awkward. She wondered what she was supposed to say.

Sometimes, she just wished that she knew how things would turn out. She wished she knew what to do, how to fix things. She wished she knew what her and Luke were supposed to be.

Before everything happened with Max, she thought that things with her and Luke had been changing. It wasn't exactly wrong to say, that they hadn't really been following all their rules. Something had been going on between them. She just didn't know what it was.

Did she feel something for Luke? Is that why she had gone to Max? Is that why she listened when Luke told her to go for it? Is that why she never second-guessed the snow? She felt something for Luke, and that scared her.

She was scared of falling for him. She was scared of what she was feeling. She was scared of what he could be feeling. She was scared of change.

Was that it? She was scared. She was scared, so she went to Max. She ran before something happened. She was scared. Was that really it?

No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no… That was crazy. That couldn't be true.

Luke was her friend. Luke made her coffee. Luke fixed her oven. Luke made her breakfast, lunch and dinner. Luke was only her friend.

Falling for Luke? No way.

Sure, Luke was a sweet guy. He was even a little bit… perfect. He could make some woman very happy someday. But, that woman wasn't her, was it?

Definitely, not now, anyway. She couldn't say what would happen 5 or 10 years from now, but as of today, Luke and her were only just friends. They were friends, who sometimes had some extremely great sex. But that was all.

Maybe… Maybe, someday, in the future… when they were both ready, and they both wanted it, they could… try. Maybe. Maybe they could give it a shot. But, what about now?

She continued to stare at the ceiling.

Maybe she should try again. Maybe she should see what happens. Maybe she should let fate runs it's course. Maybe she should just help it out, a little.

Maybe they could be friends again. Maybe she could drink his amazing coffee, flirt with him like before, and then have some really great sex. Maybe things could go back to normal. Maybe things would change. Maybe things wouldn't.

Things could go back to normal, right?

She wished she knew what normal was. She didn't know what had happened with them for those few weeks she had been with Max. She didn't know what had changed, and what hadn't. She didn't know how he was feeling. She didn't know how she was feeling.

She did, however, know that she really wanted to see him right now.

She wanted to know. She wanted to know how things would be. She wanted to know if they could fix whatever had been broken. She wanted to know if things could go back to normal, whatever normal was. She'd be his friend again. She'd sit at the counter, and flirt with him, and make him laugh. She'd be more than his friend again. She'd sneak into his apartment and unbutton his shirt and throw his baseball cap behind the couch.

She'd just wanted to know that things could be OK. She just wanted to know that things hadn't changed.

But the thing was, she did know.

Things had changed.

She wasn't sure when or why or how. But she knew. Things had changed between them. She just needed to know how much. She needed to know if they'd be OK.

She got out of bed, and slipped on her jacket as quietly as possible. She slipped on her shoes, tip-toed downstairs and went out the door.

She wasn't exactly aware of how fast she was walking, until the square came in sight. She slowed down from there.

She liked Max. She really did.

But what about Luke?

How could she date someone else when she thought she had some feelings for Luke?

Maybe she was scared. Maybe she was scared of having feelings for him, and him not returning them. Maybe she was scared of messing up, or being too vulnerable. Maybe she was scared of not having him in her life anymore. Maybe she was scared of it being too perfect.

She could list every guy she had ever known, but none of them could be better than Luke. No one listened better. No one knew her better. No one took care of her kid better. No one was better.

So, what if it didn't work out. Then, what?

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the bell at the door.

It was late. She was surprised it was unlocked. Her heart was racing from her thoughts. She couldn't exactly say they were surprising, but they were… something.

"Hey." He said, when she went to sit at the counter. "I was just closing." He told her. "Are you OK?" He asked, seeing the tear stains on her cheeks.

She laughed nervously, and wiped her finger under her eye. She forgot that she looked like shit, when she sprinted over here. "Max and I broke up." She told him.

"Oh. Sorry." He offered.

"It's OK. I don't even know why I cried… I mean… I don't know… It was just a long day, I guess." She told him.

He nodded. "I uh, I have early deliveries." He told her.

"Oh. OK. I just thought you should know."

One of these days, maybe they wouldn't be so afraid.


Man, I am just an updating machine lately, huh? Yeah, I actually have like the next 4 chapters written I think. Maybe only 3, I forget. I didn't sleep much last night, so I decided to just write a few chapters. So, anyway, the updating should be quicker. I'll probably update every few days, so you know, you guys can have some time to review. Hint, hint.

Next chapter?

Cautious: A few weeks later, Lorelai is confused. She tries to figure it all out & Luke comes to the rescue.