Somehow we recover, I think it's because Joey decides the best way to deal with it is to not. I assume that he has decided to never mention it again, because he doesn't. I guess what is there left to talk about? I admitted and apologized to everything. And whether it was genuine or not he did say the words "it's fine". So, I happily go along with never speaking of the whole fiasco.

Unfortunately, I don't realize how difficult it is to escape the fear. For the next week, everytime we're with the gang I'm so scared he's going to mention it for some reason. I sit on Monica's couch or sip my coffee at the Central Perk and everytime Joey talks I stiffen. I just wait for him to call me out and embarrass me in front of our friends.

But he never does, they all still have no idea and although the nerves never fully shake off, I start becoming more thankful than fearful when I'm around Joey. I guess he was really that uncomfortable with it all. I thought he would use it against me. Maybe it's because he would share some of the humiliation or maybe he honestly wants to erase the memory. Whatever his reason is, I'm finally getting used to the fact that he's not going to spill the beans to everyone.

We're also still pretty normal. Joey treats me the same and I don't sense any unusual behavior from him, which I couldn't be more grateful for.

Until, one Friday night Joey asks Ross to hang out and they don't invite me. I find out they're going to a club and I wonder if Joey purposely didn't invite me because of what happened. He never actually told me, I overheard from the girls they were going, it's hard to keep secrets with such a tight knit group like ours.


As Joey is waiting for Ross to come by so they can leave for the club, I decide I'm okay with this. If not being able to go to some clubs or a bar with Joey is all I have to give up, then that's fine. It's better than not having him as a friend at all.

I hear the phone ring and I think its Ross. Joey's asking where he is and then is asking why and sounds disappointed. I'm caught up pretty quick.

I head out to the living room to confirm my assumption.

"Hey Joe," I say and go to the fridge so it seems like I walked out here for a reason.

"Hey," he sighs.

"What's up?" I ask.

He looks at me and takes a second. I bet he's deciding whether to tell me or not.

He finally lets out a long breath and tells me.

"Ross and I were gonna go out tonight and he just cancelled on me."

"Aw, that's too bad," I try to react realistically, as if I didn't know already.

"Yeah," he says and pauses. I wait.

"Do you…uh want to go?" he actually invites me. I thought he might even go by himself.

"Okay sure," I say.

I'm hoping by going I can prove I'm not going to ever put him in a bad situation again. I want to try to make him comfortable going anywhere with me again.


It ends up, I don't have to try hard at all because when we get to the club, I lose Joey in about twenty minutes. I don't see him most of the night.

I sense pretty soon that I doubt there's many gay guys here, seeing that the ratio of girls to guys is extremely uneven and so pretty much all of the guys here are crawling over the women.

I try to make small talk, but it's not very enjoyable. People aren't even being that friendly.

A few hours pass and I decide I'm leaving. I'm not even drunk, I only had maybe two or three drinks.

I go to find Joey to tell him I'm leaving. I finally find him ordering another drink at one of the bars. He looks pretty drunk already. I tap him on the arm and he's very happy to see me.

He's at the point now where his words are slurring and he's not doing himself any good so I cancel his drink and I tell him we have to go home.

He argues at first, but I convince him basically by dragging him out of there.

We get home and I have to half hold him for him to keep his balance and to make sure he doesn't wander off.

"Alright I'm putting you to bed," I demand, walking him to his room.

"Putting me to bed? Hey I may be drunk, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna let you do ssstuff," he drunkenly sermons me.

Oh god, I thought we were never going to bring this up? I knew I should have listened to my gut, I knew he would mention it again someday; I just finally convinced myself it wouldn't be so soon.

I know he's pretty smashed, but I feel awkward now that it's in the air again. I don't respond and hope he forgets.

I walk him to his bed, with my arm around him, while he leans against me. I let go and let him fall onto his own bed. I just want to get out of here, I feel like anything I do or say he's make fun of me and accuse me of trying to come on to him.

"Okay, sleep tight."

"Chandler, wait I was kidding!" he tries reaching out for me, but doesn't have to strength to lift his body. He's only partly propped up on his side.

"You need to sleep now Joe."

"No, come on, I'm not tired! Why don't you call Dominick and try… your dirty plan," he whispers naughtily and although it's more than evident he's taunting me, I'm a little turned on by hearing him actually say this, but at the same time it make my face burn red.

"No, Joe I already apologized okay, I wouldn't have let him do anything to you," I tell him clearly.

"Yeah, that chick wouldn't let me do anything eitherrr," he admits woozily out of nowhere.

"Well, there's always next time," I oddly say.

"Next time? I'm horny now," he whines and I'm unsure of how to respond to this surprising honestly. Me and Joey never talked like this even before I was out. I guess he's that intoxicated.

At this point, he tries to sit up, but he's having difficultly. He turns the other way I guess to venture towards his pillow at the top of the bed, but he nearly falls over himself.

"Okay, careful," I tell him and lean over the bed to make sure he doesn't land poorly, twisting his wrist or something. He laughs like a child. I sit on his bed. He sits back on his knees and he looks at me funny.

"What?" I nearly laugh. Now I find it kind of funny, he's acting crazy.

"I just like you, I like you Chandler… as my best friend, don't get annny ideas…" he remarks.

"Don't worry, I'm not," I assure him.

"He inhales the largest breath of his life before continuing.

"I was thinking…" he starts.

He tries to move closer to me, but basically falls on top of me.

"Alright," I say catching him and trying to push him up again.

"Can we do some to—night?" he asks.

"What?" I choke out. I have no idea what he means and now so many things are racing through my mind.

"Do something, I'm bored," He complains to me.

Now, I realize what he meant and oddly I'm very disappointed he just wanted something to entertain him. I guess I shouldn't have jumped to anything sexual, especially with Joey.

He's in no state to do anything so I fully push him off me and help guide him onto his back so he's actually lying on his bed.

"You need to sleep," I stress and helps him rest his head on his pillow.

"I need to take these off!" He suddenly squirms like a kid and hurries to get his pants off. I back up, off his bed so that I'm not touching him. I watch him throw his pants off. I see a bulge through his boxer briefs and widen my eyes. I figure I should get out of here if he's going to take care of that. I quickly exit his room and shut his door without saying anything. Although, I didn't see him move much on my way out, so I think he might have already fallen asleep. I stand outside his doorway, frozen.

I'm not about to admit to myself that I'm thinking about my roommate, my friend Joey, and getting turned on.

It's not happening, I run into my room and try to block all these thoughts out.