Disclaimer: All recognisable stuff is Lin's

A/N: Really this is just a filler chapter and the eye bleach offer still stands... *whispers* blimey no one has reported us yet! yes this chapter has been illegally written in script format as well,,,

The Chapter Where Nothing Really Happens (aka. The Chapter that Doesn't Make Any Sense)

/Based on Take A Break/ /Based on Aaron Burr, Sir/

[ALEXANDER]

My dearest, Eliza,

Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow

creeps in this petty place from day to day

I trust you'll understand my reference to another scottish tragedy

Without my having to name the play

They think Ange Macbeth,

ambition is her folly she's a polymath,

a pain in the ass, a massive pain

I am the Lady,

you are Banquo,

and Lafayette is Macduff pouncing in on me and Ange.

[ALEXANDER/ELIZA]

And there you are, a taxi away.

Do you have to live

[ALEXANDER]

Uptown?

[ELIZA]

Downtown?

[ALEXANDER/ELIZA]

Thoughts of you subside,

Then I get another letter and I cannot put the notion away

[LAURENS]

Alexander?

[ALEXANDER]

John Laurens, my man.

[LAURENS]

Take a break.

[ALEXANDER]

I am almost done.

[LAURENS]

There's a little surprise before supper and it cannot wait

[ALEXANDER]

Wait how did you get into my office

[LAURENS]

Alexanderrrrr

[ALEXANDER]

Okay, okay, I'll be there in just a minute, save my plate!

shoves laurens out the door

[LAURENS] muffled

The gang is 1 year old today

It's the perfect date for horseplay

We've booked the whole café

Alex, please come with me

[ELIZA]

My dearest Alexander,

You must get through to my sister,

Sit down with her and compromise, don't stop till you agree...

*sighs*

Really,

Who am I kidding.

An hour later...

*Alexander walks into the café*

[MULLIGAN]

If it ain't the star of the scandal!

[BURR]

Alexander!

[LAURENS]

Give us a verse,

Sprinkle dat salt!

[SALT SHAKER]

Ooh!

*shakes body on cue*

[ALEXANDER]

My luck ain't good: my campbed is cold

I flirt. They scream. I'm not getting anywhere!

[MULLIGAN/BURR]

Booo!

[LAURENS]

Chin up,

Fists up,

Do not throw away your shot!

[ALEXANDER]

shoots café windows

[LAURENS]

Ooh!

I'm John Laurens in the place to be

Two pints of Sam Adams, but I'm working on three

Those redcoats don't want it with me

Cos my man Alex will chick-a-pop their ass!

[BURR]

Oui oui, mon ami, je m'appelle Aaron Burr

The Lafayette wannabe who's very desp'rate

I dropped out of college to join the revolution

But they told me "casse toi!" Who's the best?

Ce n'est pas moi!

[MULLIGAN]

Brrrrah braaah! I am Hercules Mulligan

Upin it, lovin' it, yes I heard ya mother said "Idiot!"

Lock up ya daughters and horses, of course

It's hard to have intercourse over four sets of corsets

[ALEX]

Woohhh!

[LAURENS]

No more sex, pour me another brew, son!

Let's raise a couple more...

[LAURNES/MULLIGAN/BURR/ALEXANDER]

To our relationships!

All down their glasses in one sip and faint, falling to the floor

[LAFAYETTE]

*emerges from the shadows and stands on a table*

Da da da da da, da da da da ya da...