Chapter 7
A/N-if you're looking for the extra content mentioned in the last chapter, please see the note at the bottom of this chapter!
The drive was quiet, not quite uncomfortably silent, but noticeable. Sam knew something was strange between his Dean and Mae, more than the normal amount of strange too. He assumed when his brother went to Mae's room that his brother would be gone until morning. They were both consenting adults, so he wasn't exactly surprised to have the room to himself. It seemed odder to Sam that Mae and his brother didn't just get a room together, rather than going about the separate rooms game. It wasn't as if what the two might do together was a big secret.
He also knew Dean had a lot of hopes about what having the redheaded hunter around was going to be like, whether or not he voiced them to anyone else. Sam wasn't sure what Mae thought of all this, but he imagined that she saw this as a bigger risk than Dean did. But she must have built certain fantasies around it what all of them hunting together would be like. He wanted to think she was focused on more than just sex, but it was hard to know. With such uncertainty around the two hunters, perhaps finally being together didn't live up to expectations.
Maybe they were having second thoughts now that they were in such close quarters. Maybe they were being extra careful, trying to once again keep from doing or saying anything that might offend the other. As horrifying as chancing upon his brother and Mae in the throes of their passionate tryst, watching them tiptoe around each other was somehow more awkward. This wasn't exactly as tense as their fights or their non fights. This was something different.
He had trouble reading Mae and judging what was going through her mind. Dean on the other hand was obviously vexed. The reason was unclear. Mae and Dean has packed her things in the Impala before knocking on his door that morning. Mae fell into the routine than he and his brother had developed since they started hunting again. There wasn't anything odd or uncomfortable that came of that, except for how normal it all felt. Maybe the issue was his. Was he over analyzing the pair? Searching for problems that weren't there? Did he hope for something to go wrong on some level? Sam shook his head.
That left Dean driving, Mae reading a book and Sam in the back going over newspapers, looking for their next case. She seemed comfortable but Dean was twitchy. As much as he tried to ignore them and focus on the job, he still caught the sideways glance Dean would make to Mae every so often. If she noticed it, she had reached some sort of Zen master level of being able to ignore his brother and Sam wondered what her secret was.
It was late, though not too late by the time the trio decided to stop for the night in a town, one of the many with names blurred together. There was still time for a stop at a bar rather than retiring to a motel, Dean suggested. Sam argued that they should find a job before finding fun, but it was of course a practiced argument that even Sam knew wouldn't persuade his brother. He hoped for a moment that Mae would act as the voice of reason. But she was oddly passive about the whole situation, saying either was fine by her.
Sam went along with Dean's plan, knowing if he did, he might actually be able to get Dean to stay put long enough to explain the job he'd found. As far as small-town bars in by the wayside locations, it was a fairly non-sleazy sort of place, even a little crowded actually. A mix of people filled the establishment, allowing them to blend in like any number of twenty somethings.
Mae wondered if this was a normal scene for the two brothers; a bar, their dad's journal and newspapers, Sam reading while Dean wanted to have fun. Of course, it was. Even when they were younger, that was the dynamic, even if they weren't focused on hunting then. She knew he could buckle down and work hard, that he took the job seriously, but he also had an enviable ease when it came to being able to wind down. That might have been the norm for the boys, but something felt distinctly weird where she and Dean were concerned.
It wasn't anything she could put her finger on. They hadn't had another dust up since the day before. They had let off a little steam the night before, perhaps not everything Dean had hoped for. I had been enjoyable. Better than enjoyable really. She wasn't quite ready to tell Dean, but it had been a while since she'd had an orgasm like that from a bit of fingering. He seemed to know what she wanted without her having to tell him. It didn't hurt that he turned her on the way he did. But she wasn't going to tell him that because it would only bring that overconfident smirk of his, even if she found that a turn on too.
Now however, he was acting a little strange but hadn't told her what was bothering her. Dean probably couldn't remember the last time he took things slow, if there was a time that didn't involve her. Was he having second thoughts he hadn't expressed the night before? Maybe he'd been disappointed that they had just gone to bed instead of going for a second round and perhaps having that kind of sex he was interested in most.
The thought didn't sit well with her, but she knew Dean was still a man. And he wasn't the sort of to share his feelings instead of expressing them. He would have been far more comfortable expressing his feelings physically. To his credit, he had talked things through with her and he was adhering to the rules she'd laid out. It was hard to fault him for still having feelings about the situation, both physical and emotional.
However, when she thought about it, they weren't really friends. They hadn't been for a long time. They once were. They were once lovers, they were once boyfriend and girlfriend, and they were once family. But now…well now she couldn't define what they were. It came down to trust. She knew she could trust him on a job, as a hunter, as a partner. He would do and had done everything in his power to keep her safe too. But past that, the foundation seemed shaky. It was getting better, but he had landed in that murky area between stranger and friend.
It made all of their typical impulses with members of the opposite sex completely off base. Without their history and whatever it was they were currently doing, Mae knew she was exactly the kind of woman Dean would have wanted to meet at this sort of place. Without all that, he was the kind of guy she would have gone for too. And yet, she was still unable to put all the pieces together to make this thing with Dean perfect. He must have picked up on her hesitation. Or perhaps he thought their experiment had one too many points of failure. That might have been why she felt such a weird vibe coming off Dean on their drive.
Talking about it would be the wise solution. So, naturally, they both jumped on the idea of drinking instead. Just as instinctively, she found herself annoyed with the situation in short order. Mae's jaw tightened as she tapped out a rhythm on her thigh. She could ignore the fact that Dean's eyes always lingered a little longer than necessary on a woman passing by. Looking didn't bother her, even the lingering didn't rile her. It was the look in his eye that implied something less casual or unconscious.
At first, Dean eyed a woman who passed by their table. The woman returned a flirtatious glance and Dean winked back at her. Then turning back to Mae, he realized that she had been watching him. He offered her a smooth grin. It was one she considered charming, on occasion, and she tried to make this one of those occasions. "Drink?" He asked.
Mae didn't consider herself a possessive person and an exchanged that lasted only a few seconds was nothing to get jealous over. Expressing any of this to Dean wouldn't help the feelings go away. With a tight-lipped smile, she nodded a little. "God, yes."
"What are you drinking?" He asked, running a finger over the knuckles of the hand she had resting on the table.
The momentary contact had her heart beating more erratically than she would have wanted or expected. That thrill of longing wove its way up her spine. "Surprise me."
The words had rolled off her tongue like syrupy sweet honey. Innocent enough words but the sound was warm and lusty in his ears, making his blood run hotter. God, he thought, this was a dangerous line to walk with her. His body wanted her now but everything else told him to pull back and control himself. He hated how much she could throw him off his game at the same time he appreciated that no other woman made him feel the way this one did.
With another grin and a wink, he turned from the table and headed up to the bar. A tiny appreciative moan might have escaped her throat as she watched him walk away. He was too attractive for his own good. Or hers for that matter. Damn that jacket of his, it covered up the man's truly fine ass. She wasn't the only one checking him out she noticed. One woman was bold enough to approach him as Dean ordered drinks.
'Don't look, don't look, don't look,' she repeated to herself. She could trust him. He would eventually brush it off. And if he didn't, well she had told him if that was a needed, he had to meet right now, he would have to find someone other than her. Maybe he actually would now. Taking her eyes off him was easier said than done.
Dean's would be lover ran her obviously fake and, in Mae's opinion, tacky nails down his arm. Mae clenched her jaw and was only able to hear the blood rushing in her ears for a moment. It wasn't because some woman was hitting on him but because he wasn't shutting it down. More accurately, she though, it was because she had left the door open for this.
Monogamy wasn't something she demanded in most situations nor was it something she adhered to. But Dean was different. Mae didn't know why entirely but her possessiveness towards him was disproportionate. She wasn't ready for him, but she didn't want anyone else to have him.
Sam was saying something about a case or something he thought might have been a case. Mae wasn't sure, she wasn't listening because she was watching Dean, while telling herself not to and just trust him. But she did neither. A flare of jealousy reared up in her throat making it hard for her to breath for a few seconds. The man was flirting mercilessly with not one but two women as he waited for their drinks.
Mae knew Dean couldn't control women finding him attractive. She could let that go. His response too was something she could deal with. Even across the bar, she could picture the deepening green color, the rumble of his voice getting a little deeper, and the warm flush of his neck that a girl might not notice if she hadn't spent as much time staring hat him as Mae had.
"So, do you think we have something here?"
Her cool blue eyes were hot. Mae hadn't been subtle as she stared daggers into the back of this brother's head. She turned her attention back to Sam, the heat dissipated and was replaced with confusion. Sam. "Hmm?"
Sam kept his exasperation to himself for the moment, knowing that her sharp temper currently directed at Dean. "A pattern, these deaths I was telling you about."
Mae frowned, she was letting herself get wound up over Dean in a way she hated. This was not why she had agreed to hunt with the boys. She certainly didn't want to fixate on a relationship over the work they had to do. She tried to push Dean, her jealousy, and any extraneous details out of her min. As inattentive as she was, she only caught something about a couple deaths and New Paltz. It meant little to her without the context he had been laying out. "Sorry, can you broad stroke it for me again. I wasn't really listening."
"Yeah well, I'll get Dean and we'll go over it just once more." Sam waved his brother back over. And he returned to the table with the drinks he had originally gone to get before his flirtatious diversion.
Sam wasn't oblivious; he just didn't want to deal with their relationship issues. It was his one reservation about bringing Mae along with them. She was a solid hunter, a welcome reprieve from all the things that annoyed him about his brother, and a balancing influence on some of their extremes. He had sympathy for Mae, but she wasn't naive; she had to know what his brother was like. If she thought he would change overnight, then he felt sorry for her. She couldn't expect him to change overnight just because they had some kind of romance going on.
Dean however knew the redhead's temper had flared again. even without looking at her. And this time, he couldn't blame her. He hadn't been watching her, he had only glanced back once and saw her soft lips pressed hard and cool firmness on her face that was unmistakable for anger. He couldn't stop though. An old habit, Dean told himself.
He had no intention of doing anything with another woman, although Mae had given him permission if he was so inclined. It felt good to be with a receptive woman though. For as much as he wanted Mae, she did not reciprocate so eagerly. He pounced, out of habit, before pulling himself back, but he was painfully aware Mae had seen the whole thing. She didn't say anything when he returned to the table with drinks. She shifted away from him, slightly. Perhaps he wouldn't have noticed if he wasn't watching her.
Unsolicited, he explained. "Hey, I was only seeing if she or her friend might be interested in Sammy here."
Mavis's face remained impassive and he couldn't tell if she bought the excuse or not. She didn't say anything, it was Sam who spoke first. "Dean, no thanks, I can get my own dates."
"Yeah, you can, but you don't."
Mae's eyebrow quirked, it was an interesting dispute although possibly out of the arena of mere brotherly concern. Okay, maybe there was a thread of truth in Dean's excuse. A very thin thread.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"Nothin'. What do you got?"
Sam paused for a moment, looked at both Dean and Mae before he continued. "Mark and Anne Telesca of New Paltz, New York were both found dead in their home just a few days ago. Throats were slit, there were no prints, no murder weapons—Dean." His brother's glance had been focusing on the tight twitch of Mae's clenched jaw, although she wouldn't even look back at him. "So," Sam continued once his brother looked back at him, "No prints, no murder weapons, all doors and windows were locked from the inside."
A job wasn't perfect right then, Dean wanted some time with Mae. He was making progress with her. "Could just be a garden-variety murder, you know, not our department."
"No, Dad says different."
"John gave you a lead on this case?" Mae asked, interest piqued.
"What do you mean?"
"Look," Sam turned John's journal to Dean, "Dad noted three murders in the same area of upstate New York. First one, right here, 1912, the second one in 1945, and the third in 1970. The same M.O. as the Telescas—the throats were slit, the houses were locked from the inside. Now, so much time passed between the murders that nobody checked the pattern, except for Dad. He always kept his eyes peeled for another one."
"And now we got one."
Mae only gave another appreciated hum as she looked over at the paper and journal entries.
"Exactly." Sam said.
"All right, I'm with ya. It's worth checkin' out." Sam nodded and Dean looked back at Mae, who was doing her best to avoid eye contact. "We can't pick this up till the first thing, though, right?"
"Yeah." Sam said, slightly confused.
"Good." Dean slid the third beer over to Mae, "you in Red?"
At last, her eyes met his. He blue gray eyes had cooled, to the point that left him uneasy. Temper was a good thing coming from her sometime. It was something he could work with. It meant she wasn't shutting anything down and he understood now that she used that as a default. He realized that he would rather have he be actively pissed off rather than calm. "Yeah, I'm in. I need some air though."
Miscommunication and misunderstanding seemed to be what they were best at. He didn't have a spell to blame this one on. He couldn't even convince himself that when she said if he was just looking for sex, he could sleep with someone else. Dean didn't believe that she meant it as an actual offer. And more importantly, he didn't want that. Even having a much more willing woman flirt with him and flirting back, Mae wasn't far from his mind. He couldn't stop thinking about her. He hated that they kept fucking things up.
However, before Dean had a chance to follow the redhead as she headed out the door of the bar, his brother punched him in the arm. "Dude, are you seriously hitting on other women, in front of her? I thought you two were like… like dating or something."
Dean ran a hand over his face. "Yeah, I know, it was just… I wasn't trying to hook up with those chicks or anything. It was a reflex. And they started it."
"You might want to consider stopping next because I get the feeling, she only has this reaction once before she starts with her array of hidden knives."
Sam was right, he at the very least owed Mae an explanation. "I know, I know. I'm going after her."
The hunter hadn't gone far, only pacing outside the front of the bar. When she saw him, Mavis sighed? He raked his hand through his hair then shrugged. He spread his hands out in a gesture of surrender, then tucked them in the pockets of his jeans. "Okay so…yeah I don't know."
There wasn't an apology in there, not exactly but she could tell by the restless gestures he made that he too was searching for a real reason behind his behavior, aside from the obvious. "It's fine. It's not like I have any claim to anything here. Besides, I'm the idiot who told you if you wanted to get laid, you should just find some chick who would do that for you because I'm not there yet. If I didn't want whatever that was, I should have said something."
"You know, I didn't really take that as a serious offer. And even if it was, that's not really what I'm looking for right now."
"So, you're picking up women because...?"
"I wasn't exactly..." He sighed, pacing alongside her. Whatever the excuse was, it didn't matter. "Yeah, I know. I've never… had a girlfriend, not really. You're the only girl I've ever dated for a significant amount of time and we never had to deal with any real relationship things. I just… I'm sorry. Can we start over?"
Mae laughed. "Dude, we can't start over every time one of us does something that annoys the other."
"Yeah we can."
This smile wasn't cocky, it was hopeful, but it was also a little scared, like she might really leave over this. For some reason, it was the sort of thing that softened her heart. She stepped closer to him, pointing a finger at him. "You'd be pissed if I were hitting on some scuzzy bar guy."
"Damn straight!" He would have been. He already thought of her as 'his girl' again so she was right, "but uh… how 'bout I give you a pass and next time you can hit on some weird dude and I'll glower?"
"I'd be tempted to take you up on that offer just to see if you can manage to not get riled up for even five minutes. But that's not what I'm looking for either. I don't know what this thing between us is, but it isn't just a passing thing. I just want us to...be different. I don't want to play stupid games and I don't want either of us to feel like we have to prove something to the other. I want this to be a little less awkward between us."
"Me too. I'm up for that. So, for starters, we could go back in, have a couple of drinks and I'll try not to let my irresistible good looks get in the way."
Laughing, she stepped closer, pressing her hand to his chest and leaning into a soft kiss. She paused another moment after their lips parted and they turned head back in the bar. Dean put his arm around her when she was close enough. "Hey, I know, you can invite one of those chicks over for drinks and then start hitting on some girls in front of them. I found it pretty unappealing so maybe that would help turn them off you."
"Funny." He said sarcastically, although he thought to himself that it sort of was cute.
This time, he made the concerted effort and lavished his flirtation on Mae and Mae alone. At some point, overcome with discomfort about watching the pair drink and flirt, Sam left, although they barely took note of his departure. The two continued to drink and laugh and drink. Until they were well and drunk.
It was nice to be out together, acting like normal 20 somethings. It was fun to go out and drink together. Mae realized didn't have to keep her guard up, she didn't have to worry about sleazy guys trying to spike her drink. Now Dean wasn't totally harmless, he was trying his best to seduce her. It wasn't entirely unwelcome nor entirely ineffective. She liked that he found her attractive and that he wanted with her. To her surprise, she even felt sexy. Even though they had a relationship years ago, she never felt that way with him. A part of her always thought they ended up together simply because they were together.
This was different; they had decided to attempt this on purpose, and it was clear to her that Dean saw her in much the same way he'd seen those women he was hitting on earlier. The thought made her uncomfortable. Because it made her looser, more comfortable with the idea and with Dean, she drank more than she normally would have. It was more than she should have, and Dean wasn't too far behind her. When they decided to leave the bar, they were both past the point of making good choices.
He wrapped his arm around her waist as they walked out of the bar to keep her steady as much as himself. They were stumbling more than walking and it left her giggling as she pressed her cheek against his shoulder. "I think I'm drunk Dean."
"Yeah, you are."
"Like you're going to church sober." She snorted.
"Is that a thing?" He asked.
Laughing, she turned, stopping them both to lean up and kiss him. He took full advantage of the situation. Her mouth was sweet, heavy with the twist of whiskey. Any promise he made the night before slipped to the back of his mind as her arms twisted around his neck, pressing her slim body against his. She was warm, pliant, and just as intoxicating as anything he'd consumed in the bar.
He wanted her. At no point had he kept that secret but for the first time in a long while, he thought maybe he could have her. Not just have her for the night, not just have sex with her or sleep with but really have her in his life again. Although that night, the rapidly increasing chance of sex with her weighted more on his mind than the rest. She wasn't second guessing herself or her feelings, so he only thought about enjoying her.
He could only think about the slender, athletic body dwarfed by the denim and flannel. Unlike most of the women in his life, Mae kept her assets hidden, which found oddly appealing. It surprised him. He liked knowing what he was getting into beforehand; he liked the teasing aspect of tight and skimpy clothes. And if he didn't know her, maybe he wouldn't be so captivated with her. The woman didn't wear much makeup, didn't have highly coiffed hair and she was dressed a bit like a lumberjack. Still, she was a beautiful woman. Maybe he would have taken a second glance, knowing she looked like she did without any help. Other men certainly did.
Mae kissed him with relish but not her typical finesse. Her fingers played against the short-cropped hair at the nape of his neck. The light teasing touch sent a fiery feeling down his spine. It was an amazing sensation because there was no special move there, nothing tricky or skilled. Only her touch. The sensation was nowhere near new, but it was addictive; she'd always somehow possessed that talent, but he thought by now it would have worn off.
They made their way back to the motel. At the door to her room as she moved to unlock it, he pulled her arm, spinning her around so he could press her against the door. He kissed her there, hot and a little sloppy but it was a move that almost always worked. With one hand, he braced himself against the door too. The other was a bit more adventurous, working the buttons of the green flannel shirt open, occasionally brushing her breast lightly with the back of his hand.
In the back of her mind, she thought she should stop him and wanted to stop him. But no part of her mind was running the show right then. Not when he smelled so nice and tasted like he did and certainly not when that firm wall of muscles that was Dean stood so close to her.
Making out with him against the door of some cheap motel was exciting. For reasons she couldn't quite put her finger on, a little daring, a little reminiscent of something more random and foreign. But because it was with Dean, she felt safe and unburdened. This wasn't just because they were horny. It wasn't about satisfying a need either. Not entirely.
All of that was there, layer in a complex mishmash of all their other emotions, heavily lubricated by liquor. Now, she was more than willing to let him do what he wanted. Mae had a handful of sexually frustrated months under her belt and the small taste of what he offered from the previous night drove her alcohol-soaked mind. She wanted him to, maybe more than usual in this particular moment. That thought kept circling around her mind her mind even as his knee moved up to part her thighs.
Oh, she thought, Dean Winchester was the only man who could make her feel like this; uncontrolled but safe, calm but wild, and desirable. He had always had that power and she had never found any other man who could give her all of that. She turned her head away from his eager mouth. "Dean… Dean, we're not inside yet."
"I know… why don't I let you open the door?"
Her fingers played at the collar of his shirt. Those pretty blue eyes of hers were dilated but lusty as she weighed her options. He twirled her hair between his fingers, fascinated with those silky red strands for a moment as he eyes shifted from hungry to greedy. Without turning around, she managed to slide the key in the lock and turned the knob. The opening door sent them tumbling backwards into the room. The falling sensation sent Mae into a thither of giggles as Dean fought to stay upright, catch her before she hit the ground, and hold her firmly against him.
I provided him a moment of clarity. She was drunker than he was, and, in that moment, he found her busy hands and lusty mouth unappealing. Well, he thought, not unappealing, quite the opposite in fact but he knew if she were sober, she wouldn't be doing any of this. Her actions were fueled more by whiskey and while he wasn't usually opposed to a drunken tryst, he didn't want to start out on that foot.
Shutting the door behind them and making sure it was locked, he took her by the shoulders to holder her at arm's length. This wasn't how he wanted to have sex with her the first time. "Red, we've gotta stop."
She tugged at his shirt, trying to pull him closer again. "No, we don't. I want you. I need you."
"As much as I would, oh Jesus…" he moaned as she managed to throw her arms back around him and press herself against him. She started kissing his neck, occasionally letting her teeth scrape along his skin. "Yeah, we've got to stop before… before this goes any further."
"We haven't done anything. You don't want to get laid tonight?"
That nervous chuckle did nothing to alleviate the tension in this body. "Believe me Maes, if this was you sober, I wouldn't think twice. I don't want to do it when you're this drunk and neither do you."
"It's not like I'd say no even sober."
"You did last night so we'll just have to test that out later, okay?"
"Mmm…" she moaned, you're not fun"
"Don't worry, I'll be fun later."
Hey all, I realized I couldn't share the link to the extended content for chapter 6 with to anyone who reviewed as guests. So, you can find me on AO3 as MistyGish. This whole series is up on AO3, the only difference in content is with explicit scenes/chapters, which I'll note on each chapter so you can also search by Story Title.
