A/N: *gasp*
Look!
Guys, look!
Oh my God, it's another update! And it's been less than a week! I'm so proud. And impressed. I was really excited for this chapter, though, so I'm not exactly surprised. Please enjoy your second update in a week. *does finger guns*
He needed answers. That was for sure. In fact, that was the only thing he was sure of. He needed to know what was happening to him, and why it was happening. Then maybe he'd be able to function on the basic level without too much difficulty. The sooner he figured everything out, the sooner he would be able to shut down every emotion tied to it. Tied to her.
The only problem was the source of his information. The choices were limited to begin with, but when he considered the fact that he'd pretty much exhausted almost all of his resources, he saw that he really was running out of options. He wasn't getting anywhere with the Order archives. The best they could give him was the cure for thirty-seven different fevers with symptoms similar to, but not matching, his. He was frankly too scared to get anywhere with Snoke, seeing as his master didn't trust him when any of his symptoms were simply mentioned. That left Hux, and there was a real fat chance he would get anything from that man. He was about as clueless as a being could be when it came to the Force. Not only did he know nothing about it, but he was completely irreverent towards the concept of it, and cared nothing about looking into it more. Simple beings begot simple understandings, Kylo supposed.
He also supposed that if he wanted to find any answers, he was going to have to leave the ship to do so. He had one person he could think of at the moment that he figured would get him answers, though the prospect of meeting this particular person wasn't something he enjoyed. Still, he wanted answers more than he wanted comfort at this point, so he was going to have to swallow his pride and do what he needed to do. The first problem that met him in regards to his plan was getting off the ship. Snoke did not want him leaving unless he was granted permission to do so, and for a valid reason. As a result, Hux would be keeping a sharp eye on him lest he do anything actually worth reporting to the Supreme Leader. If he did somehow manage an escape plan, his command shuttle was definitely out of the question as traveling in it would not only be like a flashing sign that he was disembarking from the ship, but would also require a crew he did not have the time nor the resources to assemble. There were small planetary traveling pods in a secondary hangar on the far side of the ship. However, those pods were catalogued and closely monitored so that none could be stolen or used for recreational purposes. His third plan involved hijacking a confiscated ship, but that would not only put an Order target on his back but a universal target; not only was he stealing but the ships were logged and tracked and became wanted on every planet in every system if seen. That was pretty much all of his options, and none of them led to a way out.
The best he could do for now was lay low and wait for his opportunity to arise. He just wasn't sure he'd be lucky enough to receive one.
He'd never been happier to be wrong. His opportunity came several days later as they prepared to solve a patrolling problem on the very planet he needed to be on. He found out by way of Hux when he was summoned to the main hangar. Apparently, there had been talk of a rebellion or an abandonment of posts, and as a result, many suspected conspirators were being removed from their posts and sent to reconditioning.
Kylo couldn't believe his luck. In fact, he didn't believe his luck. Something was definitely going to go wrong or become difficult. When that something happened, he wasn't surprised. He was even prepared.
"You'll be here monitoring their ground progress. Make sure that they get to their new posts without issue. I'll be on the ground with them, but of course I can't monitor every single one of them on foot…"
He continued to drone on as Kylo pretended to listen, when in reality he was thinking of ways to twist this situation so he could be where he needed to be. He decided the best thing he could do was hit all the right points of Hux's ego and in the end, he'd basically be begging Kylo to go to the ground.
"Would it not be better if someone with more military tact was up here surveying from above?" The words were sickening to Kylo and he couldn't believe that he was sucking up to this man, but he was desperate. "I understand that you don't trust them enough to perform this task on their own, so if you were up here-"
The redhead's sharp features darkened as he turned to look in Kylo's direction. "Have you ever considered," he interrupted, "that it is not them I do not trust, but you?"
Kylo's eyes narrowed and he looked away, swallowing his rising emotions so as not to fuel Hux's as the redhead continued.
"If you're here giving me updates and statistics, I know you aren't out destroying half of my ship. I also know you aren't sneaking off to who knows where to do who knows what with who knows who."
"Would tracking me from the ground not make your job easier?"
Hux sighed and turned away, adjusting his jacket before clasping his hands behind his back. "I don't know what you're playing at, Ren, but you can't play me. Up here, I know I have hundreds of witnesses to your behavior."
Kylo growled internally. He had to get into that system. Granted, the best thing he had at this point was a half-baked plan that had about a zero percent chance of working, but he needed to at least be able to try. If Hux wouldn't give in to flattery, he'd certainly give in if his ego was attacked.
"A little pathetic that you need the assistance of several hundred of your inferiors to do your job," he mumbled wryly.
"A little pathetic that Supreme Leader believes that I need to do this job in the first place, but that's not for my judgment."
Though Hux was silent, Kylo knew he was aware that he'd bested him. He balked at him, his tampered rage flaring, but he forced himself to swallow his pride and remain silent. There had to be a way to get to the ground, and lashing out wasn't it.
They both watched as groups of Stormtroopers who'd already been on the ground tromped by, their white armor marred by streaks of dirt, mud, and tree sap. Hux's lip curled, his face twisting into one of disgust.
"I didn't realize that the ground would be so… unclean. "
Kylo resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "Yes, that's usually how it works."
Hux rolled his tongue along his lower lip in disgust before inhaling sharply and turning to Kylo. "I suppose you could go to the ground. So long as we take the proper measures to ensure you're where you need to be."
Kylo couldn't believe his ears.
"We will place a homing beacon on you, and you will escort the troops to their new posts. Have all the…corrupted individuals marked to be sent to questioning and eventually reconditioning. After you've gathered them all, come back to the ship immediately ."
"Yes, sir."
Hux must have sensed the mischievous triumph in his tone because he stepped up directly in front of Kylo and narrowed his eyes. "If anything starts to go awry, I will pull the ship with or without you. If it's without you, there will be hell to pay when we finally manage to drag you back."
"Is that a threat, General?"
"Of course it isn't," he said as he turned to leave. "It's a promise."
On any other day, Hux's parting words would've driven Kylo all sorts of crazy. But for now, he was too busy silently celebrating his victory to make room for Hux's snide remarks. His plan was in motion. This was happening.
They'd put the homing beacon in an "undisclosed" item of his gear. Of course it had only taken Kylo about three standard seconds to find and remove it, planting it on a supervising officer at the first opportunity. He'd snuck away as soon as he was sure no one was looking. Now, he was wandering along, counting on the trees and brush to keep him hidden from view. He wasn't sure exactly where he was headed, dependent on the guidance of the Force currently thrumming in the air around him, but he had a pretty good idea of what he'd find when he arrived.
After at least thirty minutes of floundering after impulses from the Force, he pulled back a large tree branch and spotted a crudely made, dilapidated building not a hundred paces in front of him. The corner of his lip curled upward; she was in there.
He pulled his hood far over his face, casting a shadow over his features and hiding them from anyone who may glance his way, stepping up to the door smoothly. He walked in amid the hoots and hollers of gamblers and drinkers alike, shuffling along the wall inside the small, makeshift cantina. It had been erected in the wake of the destruction of the previous one in their attack here so long ago. He used the copious amounts of people to his advantage, using their noise and his silence to scope the place for the one person he really cared about seeing. Humans and creatures alike were too invested in their own activities to pay him much heed, especially when Kylo used the help of the Force to persuade a few patrons to leave him alone when necessary. He scanned the numerous tables and counter-side chairs for the object of his searchings, but as it turned out, he didn't need to find her; she'd already found him.
"How dare you come here?"
He turned to face her, a small smirk twisting his features. "Maz Kanata. Just the woman I wanted to see. Takodana is gorgeous this time of year, by the way. I see business is booming."
Her wide brown eyes narrowed behind her goggles, "No thanks to you." She pointed a gnarled, wrinkly finger up at him. "If you have come all the way here to cause trouble for all these people-"
He waved her hand away, scoffing at her. "There'll be no trouble here, Maz. Just this once. I've come here today to discuss a more... personal matter."
The small orange woman eyed him up and down in that way of hers, making him fight hard to keep from shifting under her gaze. Even though he thought himself successful in evading her judgments, an amused glint crept into her eyes, though her expression stayed guarded.
"Come," she said, turning and beckoning towards a dark, empty corner.
He followed her, sitting down in a chair swallowed by the shadows while she pulled up a stool.
"Take off that hood, boy," she scolded him. "Even if someone were to recognize you in here, they'd be too drunk to care."
"I think it's best that I don't do that."
Maz stared at him, her eyes still searching for...something. "Then I think it's best that you leave."
He glowered at her. She leaned forward, her voice low, her tone serious, "If you feel that it is so unsafe for you to be here, then why are you here at all?"
"Because I need answers!" he yelped, throwing his hood off and leaning towards her in one swift motion. "I'm...sorry. I'll take my hood off, I'll run laps around the building, I'll do anything. I just need answers."
Maz leaned back on her stool, crossing her arms. "As fun as it would be to watch you…"
She trailed off and it was silent for a moment, tense as she stared him down, her eyes boring holes in his. He refused to back down. Refused to look away. So he stared right back. Too late he realized that maybe he shouldn't have. Her eyes widened and her face bore mixed emotions of surprise, grief, and pity.
"So, it's true, then. Your father...he's gone."
Kylo stiffened and he clenched his jaw. "I don't have to discuss this with you," he managed to bite out.
She stared at him for a moment longer before she finally looked away, visibly deflating. "No, you don't. That burden is for you to bear, and you alone. At least, until someone decides to share it with you."
Kylo didn't know what to say to that, or if he should even say anything to that, so he quickly changed the subject. "Strange things have been happening to me."
Maz shrugged. "I've heard so many people say that, I could populate an entire planet with them."
"Well, I bet this is a little different."
"And I bet it is too. But if you don't hurry up, I'll be dead before I get to find out." Her voice lacked any sympathy, any softness, though her posture emulated that of an old friend simply catching up with him.
Kylo swallowed hard, ashamed that this small creature could intimidate him as much as she did. He'd leveled entire towns, entire cities, but he cowered in the face of Maz Kanata? He really was pathetic. "It started with...mood swings. Mood swings and thoughts that weren't mine."
"Thoughts that weren't yours? How could you possibly know that?"
"Maz, I was recalling things that I'd never experienced."
She nodded in acknowledgement, waving to encourage him to continue.
"Then, it developed into visions. Visions where I could see-" he cut off. What was he supposed to say? He wasn't going to outright tell her everything. "I could see someone, but they couldn't see me."
Maz's eyes narrowed, but she said nothing.
"Now, I think they might've had visions where they could see me, but I couldn't see them. Because I heard them, but I swear to you no one else was there."
"I see. Well, you were correct; I've never heard anything like that from anybody before."
"I'm - I'm not done."
Maz sighed heavily. "Let's have it."
Kylo cleared his throat. "Well, you see...I think we're sharing dreams."
Maz's eyes widened, then her expression sobered. "This person...are they Force-sensitive?"
"Very."
Maz put an arm on the table, leaning so far forward her stool was tilting. "Mind giving me the name of this particular Force-user? I'm assuming you know them if you know that they are , in fact, Force-sensitive."
"Why do you need to know?"
"It would be easier to tell you what I know if I knew what it is I know about the subject of your questions, Ben."
" Don't call me that," he barked.
"Don't you take that tone of voice with me, young man," Maz countered, pointing a finger at him once again. "I was giving sage advice when you were still in diapers, I can call you what I please. Who's the Force-sensitive?"
"It's another human Force-user, and that's all you need to know," he mumbled, avoiding Maz's gaze.
All of a sudden, Maz positively beamed, and Kylo just knew -
"It's the girl, isn't it?"
Again, Kylo wouldn't meet her eyes. Maz chuckled as he stared down at the table, picking at the worn edges of it with his gloved thumb. Eventually, it became silent and stayed that way for so long, Kylo wondered if Maz had simply given up on his pathetic self and walked off.
He was wrong.
Instead, her hand appeared in his line of vision, taking his hand and picking it up in both of her own. Though her hands were comically dwarfed by the size of his, she possessed no awkward or intimidated air. In fact, she seemed as confident as she had ever been. He looked up at her, surprised that she had managed to make her way around the table so quietly. She smiled at him, genuinely smiled at him, for the first time since he'd been a kid.
"The Force, Ben. It's calling you. It's calling her. I don't know why yet, and I won't pretend to. Why should I? I'm a thousand-year-old crazy cantina owner. But I know it enough to know it's calling." She squeezed his hands gently. "For goodness' sake, Ben; follow it. Follow it wherever it leads. Even if it leads you straight to her and her Light. Especially if it does. Trust it. It has plans for the two of you."
Kylo didn't know if he'd ever been so furious. How dare she try to take the Darkness from him? The thing that made him stronger, less vulnerable. He ripped his hand out of hers, glaring at her with all the fury he could muster. "You know nothing of the Force."
Though at first she seemed shocked, Maz regained her composure in record time. "Clearly neither do you, or you wouldn't be here."
Only infuriated further by her words, he opened and closed his mouth several times, too furious to find some of his own. Finally, he gave up, turning to storm out of the crowded place, once again throwing his hood up over his head. He didn't need her or her 'Trust the Force' bantha fodder, anyway. He'd figure this out on his own.
Maz watched the young Solo leave sadly. She shook her head, a small sigh making her shoulders sag. She'd had such high hopes for him as a boy. So bright and exuberant, ready for adventure and filled with a sense of wonder, just like his father. He'd wanted to be just like Han. But he never had been quite fearless enough to do what Han did. Maz knew that one of the big reasons he'd been so averse to her advice was because of that fear, but that boy needed to push his fear down and follow where the Force led, or she feared his story would come to a rather melancholy end. Which was something she did not want to witness.
As she moved to clear some of the tables, a patron in the corner caught her eye, the collar of her jacket pulled up to cover her face. But her hair was unmistakable.
A sharp pang of sorrow hit Maz in the chest, and she moved to go to the solitary figure. When she approached the table, they did not look up. Whether that was because they did not want to see Maz or because they really just didn't see her was unclear. Maz smiled sadly, patting the lonely soul on the arm.
"Leia."
Finally, the figure looked up at her, her face older than Maz remembered and much, much sadder. The hopeful fire that usually burned behind Leia's eyes was gone, replaced by loneliness and loss. The creases in her once-fierce and determined face were now more defined than Maz ever remembered seeing them, masking the youthful fire she knew still resided there somewhere.
"What are you doing here?"
Leia shook her head, staring down into her drink. "I don't know."
Maz pulled herself into a chair, folding her hands on the table and staring at them, for once unsure of what to say.
"That was him, wasn't it?" Leia finally whispered. "He was just here. My son was here."
Maz nodded.
Leia sighed, shuffling her drink between her hands. "I couldn't even talk to him. Couldn't bring myself to look at him. My own son. I don't know if I'll ever be able to look at him again."
Maz chanced a glance at Leia's face. It was so filled with sorrow that it seemed like it had never known happiness.
"And it's not because I'm scared. Even though I know I probably should be. It's because I'm angry. Because I'm hurt."
Maz placed one of her hands on Leia's. "You have every right to feel that way. What your son did was cruel and inhumane. It was beyond reason and any and all human decency."
Leia looked up at Maz, and she was shocked to see tears in the princess' eyes. "Maz, I want him back. Even after all he's done, I just want him to be home again. I want him to be happy. That's all I've ever wanted for my son. Ben's always had a hard time being perfectly happy, and some of that's probably my fault."
"You don't give yourself enough credit."
Leia ignored her. "I hate seeing him this way. I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't think he's going to be able to come back now."
Maz squeezed Leia's hand gently. "I saw your son's eyes. I saw fear, desperation, confusion. I saw anger, and hate, and bitterness." She lifted her hand to Leia's shoulder. "But I also saw guilt. I saw remorse. And I saw his longing to come home."
Kylo knocked aside another branch angrily. How dare she say those things to him? Him? Didn't she know who he was? What he'd done? She should be afraid of him, of what he could do. But of course she wasn't. She knew him too well. Knew everyone and everything too well, if you asked Kylo. She really could say anything she wanted to him, and it would probably be true. He knew that anger wasn't the only thing he'd been feeling. Fear had almost strangled him because he was afraid that what she'd been saying was true. But it couldn't be. It wasn't. For once in her long, long life, Maz Kanata was wrong.
But he still hadn't solved the problem he'd originally set out to solve. If anything, it was now worse than it was before because he would constantly be thinking that he and the scavenger were tied somehow.
He kicked aside a stone. He didn't even know where he was going, his patience wearing too thin to try and follow his Force-fueled impulses. However, he took it as a good sign that he recognized several of the things he passed, and eventually meandered his way into a clearing.
An empty clearing.
His stomach dropped. He was sure this was where they'd landed. Where everyone needed to be. But there was no one. Nothing. Not even an empty ship. He saw the indention the landing skids had made in the grass, and his heart stopped and began to beat faster all at once.
They'd left already. Without him.
A/N: Hope you guys enjoyed! It is a little shorter than normal, but not by too much, so I hope it doesn't bother you guys.
As always, thank you guys so much for reading!
