THE CROWDED ROOM PART 7
TWO DAYS LATER
Ianto walked stiffly down into the autopsy bay. His ribs were hurting but he knew very well that Owen wasn't really in the mood to deal with a patient. The medic was stomping around his domain, tidying up after dealing with Rhys' gunshot wound. Metal implements were rattled about and the sterilising cabinet door was slammed shut rather too vigorously to be good. Ianto hesitated on the bottom step, about to turn round. Owen had other ideas.
"Park your arse Tea Boy, I need to look at you."
Ianto swallowed and did as he was ordered, not wanting to piss Owen off even further. It had been one of those days. He perched himself on the end of the autopsy table and removed his waistcoat, tie and shirt, hissing with the pain as he did so.
Owen faced him, Bekaran scanner in hand.
"Shit mate that looks painful."
Ianto nodded but said nothing as Owen got to work examining his injuries, lips pursed in thin line.
"You did the right thing Owen."
The medic froze for a moment, well aware of what Ianto was referring to.
"Yeah, doesn't make me feel any better though."
"I know. But I think in the end it was the best thing. Even if you could have saved it, there is no way we would have been able to care for it properly, or get it home."
Owen stopped again and looked Ianto in the eye, the young man was clearly as upset about the whole whale thing as he was, unfortunately, he was also right.
"Sometimes I hate this job."
Ianto could only agree.
"There's nothing broken mate, but you've got some serious bruising there, so take it easy for a few days, no lifting shit or shagging. I'll give you some pain killers."
Ianto nodded his thanks and eased his shirt back on.
"I can't believe Jack, he should never have let Rhys out in the field, the bloke's a bloody idiot. What the Hell was Jack thinking?" Owen directed his question to a somewhat startled Ianto. As if he would know.
Ianto shrugged, half wondering if Jack had used it as an excuse to get Rhys out of the way on a permanent basis. He dismissed the thought a second later.
"Rhys was helpful, but I agree with you. I wouldn't like to guess at how many rules have been broken today. He should have retconned Rhys at the very least."
Owen was packing away the scanner. "Yeah what the fuck was all that about? Bloody Cooper, sanctimonious cow, did you see the way she was eyeballing Jack?"
Ianto had, but that wasn't what had bothered him. It was Jack once again dismissing how the rest of the team might feel, and now Gwen was doing it too because she knew Jack would let her get away with anything and it had endangered their lives.
Ianto slipped off the table and buttoned up his waistcoat. "I best get the reports done, thanks Owen."
The Londoner proffered a small packet of pills. "Look, Ianto, are you ok? I mean….. you know, what's happening with you and Jack?"
Ianto took the pack. "Nothing, apparently. I'm fine Owen…"
He was interrupted by the sound of footsteps thumping down the steps and he turned to see Jack standing there looking concerned and slightly breathless. He grasped Ianto's shoulders and inspected him closely and Ianto frowned at him, unhappy with being manhandled.
"Owen is he alright?"
The medic nodded. "Just bruises." Owen moved away and headed up the steps, figuring that Jack would want to talk to Ianto in private. He headed over to Tosh, who was at her work station.
Ianto edged himself back out of Jack's hold and Jack dropped his hands to his sides, looking awkward.
"I thought I'd lost you." He murmured. "When that guy shot at you…."
Ianto leant against the metal exam table and sucked in a deep breath, he didn't want the reminder that he'd literally dodged the bullet earlier that day.
"Well I'm still here." He didn't know what else to say. Jack just looked utterly lost.
"I thought I'd lost you Ianto and then when you got up I was so relieved to see you. I wish I could've just stopped time and held you."
Ianto stared at him for a moment longer and then folded his arms across his chest in a defensive posture.
"Don't. After that performance with Gwen, I just don't want to hear it Jack. You both made it sound like none of us have any feelings or lives outside of this place. Well I am happy to disappoint you. The protocols are there for a reason Jack, not only to protect the outside world, but also to protect us and you broke them."
Jack opened his mouth to retort and then closed it again to consider his reply. "I just felt it was important. If Gwen loses Rhys she'll become…"
"What? Like the rest of us? She's already had an affair with Owen, Jack. Her hypocrisy is galling enough, but you've bandied the rules around on the rest of us."
"Stop Ianto!" Jack shouted, silencing him straight away. "I know I fucked up. I do not need a moral lecture from you, of all people. After the things you've done."
Ianto shook his head and started to walk away, fury radiating from tense shoulders.
"Don't walk away from me, this discussion isn't over." Jack grabbed his arm and swung him round so violently Ianto almost lost his balance. Ianto tried to pull away, but Jack tightened his hold.
"Ianto, please." Jack lowered his voice imploring with his eyes. "Please."
Ianto sagged. "I'm not arguing with you Jack. I know my mistakes well enough and I have tried to learn from them."
Jack's grip softened and he smoothed his hand down the length of Ianto's arm and gently grasped his fingers.
"I know and I am sorry I said that." He was gratified when Ianto didn't pull away. "You are the bravest man I have ever met, the kindest, but so much has happened to you and I know that you don't have anyone at home to turn to. I just don't want to take that away from Gwen anymore. It's time things changed here, you made me realise that."
Jack pulled him closer so that their faces were barely an inch apart. "I nearly lost you today Ianto and I realised I couldn't stand for that to happen, my heart stopped when he shot at you." Jack touched his cheek. "I just…."
Ianto met his gaze. "Jack, that could happen any day in this job."
"Yeah, I know. I don't want to lose you."
"Then stop pushing me away. I don't know where I stand with you and I cannot deal with the hot and cold routine or the way you behave around Gwen. I am sorry for my petty values Jack, it's who I am. Look, this is a bad time to be having this conversation. We're both on edge after today."
Jack enfolded him in a gentle embrace and Ianto slid his arms around Jack and relaxed into the hold, comforted by the contact. Jack's fingers were running through his hair.
"You sure you're ok?"
Ianto smiled into his shoulder. "I'm fine Jack, really. Just bruised."
"Ok."
Eventually Ianto eased himself back from Jack's embrace.
"I'll make some coffee, Owen was looking like he needed some."
Jack grasped his hand. "Ianto, I'm sorry I've been such an arse."
The faintest of smiles broke on Ianto's pale face and he squeezed Jack's fingers. "We've got a long way to go Jack. Do we have the time? Can we make anything work with the way our lives are?" He whispered.
In Jack's own experience the answer was always no, but then Ianto wasn't like any of the other Torchwood operatives he'd been with previously, the last one being Alice's mother and what a disaster that had proved to be. Jack offered up a returning smile, trying to be of some reassurance.
"I don't know. Part of me says not, one day you'll step through that cog door and come back in a body bag. I could always take you off field ops…."
Ianto was shaking his head. "No, I'm good out there Jack and you know I am."
Jack sighed. "I can't show you any favouritism."
"I don't expect it or want it. You're my boss Jack, that has to come first, I know and accept that. I don't want to be protected. I just want you to trust me, to respect and to l…"
Jack kissed him, effectively silencing him. Ianto responded instinctively, because that's all he ever was with Jack, just Ianto Jones and nothing else. They broke apart for air.
"You have my trust and my respect and my heart, as shabby as it is." Their noses were touching and Ianto felt hot fingertips brush at his cheek. "I nearly lost you I've already lost you once and by some miracle got you back, alive and whole."
Ianto frowned, not understanding. Jack kissed him again, briefly and then smiled against Ianto's lips.
"A story for another day."
Ianto nodded. "Promise me, we'll talk about this Jack. I know I am as rubbish as you are with my feelings but…"
"I promise." Jack whispered into his skin.
They stood there in silence for a long time until Jack finally heaved in a deep breath.
"Coffee?"
"Yep."
FINIS
