AN: So after a long bit of time I've decided to let this fic go. I don't like doing it, and goodness knows I could have/should have planned better but I did want to post a final chapter as a thank you to all of you who took the time to give this a look. I am so sorry I could not finish it, but hope you understand.

If anyone ever wants to pick up this story and run with it on their own, by all means go ahead - but at least for now this story will remain as it is.

I hope you enjoy, I really did enjoy writing this chapter though it was also bittersweet.

Thanks again,

~Voi


A portrait of any man is made of many things; more than the way he looks, the ridge of his nose or the set of his lips, it is the nuance of his personality that speaks the loudest. And as had been historically said, 'actions speak louder than words.'

Kaiden knows this better than most and as he sits in the cell awaiting the torture that is sure to follow he can't help but wonder what sort of man history will paint him as.

Despite the difficulties of his childhood, his irreverent attitude towards his parents as a boy, the nightmare that was Jump Zero; his actions during the Reaper War had made him a very different man, a respectable man. There was acceptance when he looked at the man in the mirror, a sense of pride in what he had been able to achieve.

But where the war fostered in him the drive to do the right thing, to overcome great difficulty to do not only what was needed but to do what was just, the past five years have severely tested him. And it has become increasingly hard to look at the mirror, look himself in the eye and not recall how many times in the recent past he has made the decision to do what was necessary rather than what was just.

Killing has become easier than it ever really should be, and rather than compassion there lingers instead the cold emptiness of a man who no longer understands the gift of life. A man broken by one too many failures, it confused him when the once acceptable numbness is no longer a sufficient source of energy to keep going.

Daily lifeno longer held the sweet rush of satisfaction that it once had. And the realization made him increasingly anxious, half mad until he had returned anew to the Alliance. Throwing himself into increasingly more perilous missions, it was only then that he managed to grasp it, to feel some rush of what it meant to feel alive.

The harder the mission the better, and with every step deeper into the underworld of the galaxy the more he familiarized himself with the boy he had been, the trouble youth who had survived those darkest moments of childhood.

Leaning his head against the dank cell wall, Kaiden closes his eyes and remembers back when, in London, he told Shepard how he had surprised himself, to have changed so much from that 'messed up kid' that he had been. He doesn't know if that observation holds true anymore, and the thought keeps him up all night, more terrifying than any death or mission.

Because he remembers that boy, knows how that boy could have grown up, what sort of man that boy could have become. It keeps him up, wanting to know if he is that man now, or at the very least getting dangerously close. The kind of man who could kill without remorse, Kaiden can't help but wonder if perhaps he has crossed that line in the sand.

He jerks awake with the first of her screams. Full bodied and filled with the energy to live in his memory forever, her voice pierces the noise of the ship, rockets to the forefront of his attention.

She is screaming.

They had begun their interrogation yesterday, their torture yesterday, but it is only now, nearly a full day later that they've managed to get a sound out of her. Janeway Shepard-Vakarian is finally, finally, screaming and the realization makes him jerk against the chains that bind his arms behind his back.

She is screaming and his mind is quick to supply all multitudes of reasons, each more gut-wrenching than the next, each more heinous. And though they've drugged him, dosed him with something to block his biotics, there is no blocking the way the rage suffuses him with energy, with a purpose to break through the chains that still dare to hold him.

Because she is screaming, and his mind is filled with images of Jane as both child and woman, with images of a peace broken by violence. The desire to protect so strong it floods his system with adrenaline and eventually biotic strength.

By the time he realizes that his bindings no longer an issue he has already torn through the door with a biotic explosion that has his muscles vibrating from the strength of energy coursing through him. Gripped entirely by the need to find her, he follows the sounds of her distress, only vaguely aware of the resistance he meets, finding his sudden influx of biotic power more than enough to disarm several guards and relieve them of their weapons.

The closer he gets the more he realizes how loudly she must be screaming.

It makes the blood pound ever faster, hotter as anger tempers his biotic abilities.

But then she stops; the screaming stops suddenly, without warning, and the ensuing silence is hauntingly worse for it.

"Janeway!"

He is in the room not a moment later, and though he can barely hear anything over the sound his heart pounding in his ears, the world is thrown into sharp relief, so that every single detail is rendered with crystalline clarity.

There are two men and Lady, the leader, standing around and in the middle, half covered in blood is Janeway. She hangs in the center of the room by her wrists, blood dripping from where the chains have cut deep,

Kaiden doesn't remember making the shift from desperately angry to the all-consuming rage that explodes with enough force to draw out every ounce of biotic power he has to give. But by the time the red haze has lifted from his eyes, there is enough red to stain every wall in the room. All red save for Janeway, who hangs there trembling.

He's undone when she calls to him softly, begging him to find safety. It's unlikely she's aware of how much damage had been done to her, but he can see it with painful ease, and there is no way he will leave her.

"I'm here sweetheart." He's whispering the words into her hair as he forces the chains to release, taking her small body into his arms. She is shuddering violently by the time he is able to set her on the ground, fingers gently wiping the blood from her pale features.

Fumbling for the medpack he had ripped off another soldier, he manages to bandage her wrists before turning to look at the head wound that still bleeds freely despite the injection he's given.

He swears viciously when he finally sees, understands, what made her scream as loudly as she had.

Her biotic amp is exposed to the air, the skin of her neck and behind her ear cut back in what was clearly a fumbling attempt to try and remove it from its conduit. The idea almost makes him physically sick, and he gently traces a finger over the exposed circuits to try and reassure himself that the piece is still intact. But while the piece itself seems only marginally scratched, the attack has left it very clearly out of place.

Jane whimpers when he pushes her amp back to where it belongs, thrashes a little as the piece makes that final 'click' to acknowledge that it's slid properly into place.

"It's ok, I got you." He takes a quick check of her pulse, finding it steady despite the stresses of the reinsertion. She's still only half-conscious, but thankfully her body seems otherwise whole.

And because there is no longer any reason to stay aboard, they have all the information they need and the Alliance should be closing in on the ship's position within the next day, Kaiden knows they have no choice. They have to leave.

How he gets her to the escape pods is a confusing mess of tunnels and the desperate need to get this woman out of harm's way, to keep her safe. Emotion running high, it is only when he gently maneuvers her into one of the seats and buckles her in that he feels any semblance of accomplishment.

How ironic that he was able to so easily get her in a pod when his failure years ago had resulted in her mother's death. Perhaps everyone is entitled to a second chance.

He slams the eject button on the pod and finds them hurled through space, their future, her future, in his hands.


Thanks for reading.