A/N: Thank you for the comments.
Guest - I'm still trying to hold out hope that the writers won't turn Lena evil, especially if they are hoping to return to more of a season 1 type show as that was full of hope. Tying in any show to current politics will probably depend on viewing figures in countries that may not come across so well. In this story, Kara isn't exactly thinking straight at the moment so her plans will not be well constructed. There will be some 'non-real Alex' interactions with Kara, but they aren't going to help her.
yeahho - Thanks. I would like to stick to daily updates, but I am travelling for work so some days the posts will be missed/delayed.
"Thank you for driving me." Eliza said as J'onn drove her back to Midvale.
"It's the least I can do. You shouldn't be alone." J'onn said.
"I've been alone ever since Kara followed Alex to National City all those years ago." Eliza reminded him. "It's Kara I'm worried about. I thought she was making progress, but she seemed so defeated this morning. Perhaps we should go back."
"Lena, Sam, James, they'll look out for her. I know it's hard but you need to think about yourself. Burying your pain won't help. Trust me, I've tried, it just made me very angry. And angriness that it took Alex and Kara to break." He said before the two lapsed into silence.
Eventually Eliza said. "I keep expecting her to call."
"We only left an hour ago." J'onn reminded her.
"I meant Alex. I keep finding myself trying to email or text her before I remember I can't."
"It will get easier." J'onn said. "But nothing will ever fill the void."
"How are you doing?" Eliza asked.
"Me?"
"Alex was like a daughter to you. But I have been so consumed with my own grief and Kara's that I never stopped to ask how you were doing. And with your telepathic abilities, it must be so hard to filter out everyone's grief."
The comment earning a wry smile from J'onn who said. "Only two humans have ever picked up on that, you and Alex. For all the difficulties you had, you two really were similar."
-00-
"How are you feeling?" Eliza asked when Kara finally answered her phone.
"I'm okay." Kara said before asking. "Did you have a good journey back?"
"It was fine. But are sure you are okay by yourself?"
"You heard Lena and Sam, they are a phone call away." Kara assured her.
"Okay." Eliza said. "If you need anything, I don't care what time it is, call me."
"I will." Kara said.
"I love you." Eliza said.
"Love you too. Goodnight." Kara replied.
Having ended the call Kara picked up a photo of her and Alex and was unable to stop the tears from flowing. Once again she felt the nausea build and slowly limped towards the bathroom. But as she reached her bed tiredness hit her like a tidal wave. Too tired to go on she sat on the bed and hoped the fatigue and nausea would pass. After a couple of minutes though, while the nausea had subsided the tiredness grew and she lay down and let herself succumb to sleep.
-00-
When Kara woke she she felt dizzy and nauseas, but both of those sensations dulled in comparison to her leg. Trying to sit up she looked round for the pain medication only to remember it was in the kitchen. The kitchen that seemed so far away. For awhile she remained still deciding that she deserved all the pain that she was in. But with each passing minute the pain worsened and she was consumed by thirst. Eventually she forced herself to stand and she grabbed her crutches and tried to move to the kitchen. Only making it two steps before another wave of dizziness hit her causing her to sway before collapsing to the floor. As she landed on her broken leg the pain caused her to pass out.
When she came round again all she could feel was the searing pain in her leg. Too tired to move and too sad to care she just lay on the floor. She had no idea how long she had lay there for when she heard a bang on her door. Too tired to move she just lay on the ground.
"Kara?" Lena called from the other side of the door.
Still choosing to ignore it, Kara lay still only to hear her phone announce a message.
"Kara." Lena called from the other side of the door. "I just heard your phone. I know you are in there. I'm coming in." She said trying the handle, shaking her head when the door opened.
"Kara!" Lena exclaimed when she saw her friend on the floor. "What happened?" She asked as she hurried to Kara's side.
"I tripped." Kara lied, her voice hoarse.
"If I help can you get up or do you want me to call an ambulance?" Lena asked.
"No hospital." Kara said, knowing J'onn had enough to worry about without having to explain her alien blood to the local hospital.
As Lena managed to get Kara to her feet she noticed Kara sway and asked. "What's wrong?"
"Just dizzy. I didn't feel like eating tonight." Kara confessed as Lena helped her to the couch.
"Have you got anything for the pain?" Lena asked seeing the pained expression Kara was wearing.
"They're in the kitchen, but they make me feel sick." Kara said.
"That's probably because you are not eating with them." Lena said as she went to find the box. Having read the label she asked. "When was the last time you ate?"
"Breakfast I guess?" Kara responded as Lena started opening cupboards.
Relieved to find them stocked Lena made some toast and brought it, some water and the pain meds over to Kara.
"I'm not hungry." Kara said, the thought of food making her queasy.
"I know. But if you don't eat you'll feel worse." Lena said. As she handed Kara a glass of water and couple of tablets she noticed the photo of Alex on the coffee table.
"Where's Eliza?" She asked once Kara had swallowed the pills.
"She went back to Midvale."
"Why didn't you go with her?" Lena asked surprised.
"I need time alone." Kara replied hoping Lena would get the hint.
"I don't think that's a good idea." Lena said as she handed Kara the plate.
Noticing that Lena was watching her Kara half heartedly took a bite of toast and said.
"I'll be fine now. I'm just going to go to sleep." When Lena didn't move she added. "You don't need to stay."
"I'm going to stay here tonight." Lena said.
"No." Kara replied.
"Ignoring the fact you shouldn't be alone at a time like this, I'm not convinced you didn't bang your head." Lena said. "You can't be alone." With that she sat down and watched Kara who just stared at the toast.
"Do you want to talk about Alex?" Lena offered.
"Why? It won't bring her back." Kara answered.
"It may make you feel better." Lena argued.
"I don't deserve to feel better." Kara said bitterly.
"Kara, I know I didn't know Alex well, but she'd want you to be happy." Lena said. "What I do know more than most is how it feels when you think the world is against you. You've seen me when I've been there and you saw how I acted. So whatever you need to do or say, I'm fine with that."
"Right now I just need to be alone." Kara said.
"Okay, I lied. I'm not fine with that." Lena responded. "You shouldn't be alone."
"Then I'll just go to bed, assuming that is allowed." Kara said her tone snappy.
"I'm just trying to help you." Lena said calmly.
"I don't need or deserve help." Kara said.
"Words straight out of my mouth. But, rightly, you have never listened to me and now I'm returning the favour." Lena said. "Do you need help getting to the bedroom or do you want to sleep on the couch?" Not giving Kara time to argue she said. "I'd say you'd be better in bed, but I think it might be best not to move you. So here's what we'll do. You will stay on the couch. I'll set up some movies and we'll watch until you fall to sleep."
-00-
Not wanting to share her nightmares Kara forced herself to stay awake and almost sagged in relief when Lena started to softly snore. Content that her friend wouldn't ask further questions Kara reached for her phone and thumbed her way through the photos of her and Alex. But with each photo the sadness and guilt grew until she couldn't stop the silent tears.
-00-
"Did you get any sleep?" Lena asked when she woke with a stiff neck and saw Kara was watching TV.
"A little." Kara lied.
"Good." Lena smiled. "So what do you want to do today?"
"It's Thursday." Kara pointed out.
"It is."
"You should be at work."
"I'm the boss. I can take a day off." Lena countered.
"Lena, I appreciate what you are trying to do. But I need time alone to process everything. There are things I need to do, but I can't with you here."
"I tell you what. I will leave you alone. But I will come back later with food and if you want we can have a movie night." Lena conceded. "If you want we could invite Sam round?"
"I'm really not up for company right now." Kara said not wanting another person around that she'd have to lie to.
"Fine, no Sam." Lena agreed. "I'll be back later." Kara watched Lena go before standing and limping over to the front door, which she locked. Happy she wouldn't be disturbed again she went back to the couch.
-TBC...
A/N: Thanks, for reading and reviewing.
