AN: The adventures Josef and Shane talk about here might be expanded eventually, for inclusion in the "Songs of Life" series of stories. Oh, and FYI: the chapters are going to start getting intense after this one. The party is definitely over… (but we do have some Mickbeth lovin' coming in Chapt. 8).
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Chapter Seven:
Boys Night In
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Livin' for the minute
Living his life from day to day
If you want it, then take it
That's the rules if you want to play…
--Livin' for the Minute, Poison
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What do you get when you take three vampires and add one jug of moonshine?
Vampires are of course, creatures of the night. So are rock musicians. Taking these facts into consideration, most nights the party didn't end with the band's last encore at the Rock & Roll Rodeo. Being it was a vacation, they tried to do something different every night… but even rock stars have to kick back and relax every once in awhile.
Tonight, Shane and Mick were hanging out at Josef's. Greg and Silas had returned to Alaska as planned – but not before Shane (in his official capacity as sheriff) had confiscated the last of Randy's moonshine. They were very relaxed.
"Do you know how long it's been since I was really drunk?" Mick asked, staring into the jug for the twentieth time, checking to see how much was left. "I mean really drunk."
"Uh, I believe that would be last week, after Shane's first show," Josef supplied.
"Has it been a week already?" Shane asked.
Josef nodded. "I know, feels more like – a year. When do you go home, again?" Having the relatives visit was great – for the first few hours. Then you couldn't wait for them to leave.
And when they did, you missed them. But that was a secret he wasn't telling anybody.
Mick ignored their brotherly bickering. "I mean before that. A long time."
"Cry me a river," Shane told him unsympathetically. "You're only what, fifty-six?"
"I'm eighty-six," he corrected with an air of one insulted.
Josef drained the last of his glass and pried the jug out of Mick's hand for a refill. "He means in vamp years."
"Oh. Yeah, but you live up there in Alaska with Randy. You can get it any time you want."
Shane started singing. "Can you get it, when you want it, when you want it can you put your finger on it?"
"That must be your theme song," Josef surmised.
Singing answered him. "I'm a very fortunate man, when I want to get it I can, I never have to do without – there's such an awful lot about!"
"Hey! We're talking about me here. Can we stay on track, people?! I have missed the pleasures of getting stinkin' drunk, and it's not fair. This is definitely going onto my "why being a vampire sucks" list."
"Your what?" Josef asked.
"'Course, hangovers are on the "why it's lame to be human list…'" Mick picked the jug up from the floor where Josef had left it and refilled his own glass, then wrapped his arm around it protectively. He was the self-proclaimed "keeper of the jug" and he took his job very seriously.
"Moderation in all things," Shane intoned, earning a snort of disbelief from his brother. He slouched down on the couch and stretched his legs out, resting them on the coffee table.
Josef shoved the feet off his expensive piece of furniture. "Could be worse Mick, considering when you were born, you just missed spending those adult human years of yours during prohibition."
"Now there was a wild time. I used to be a rum runner," Shane told Mick.
Josef rolled his eyes. "Oh no, here we go again. This is why you shouldn't drink or get stoned, Shane, remember? Ignore everything he says," he told Mick. "He's a liar when he's drunk."
"During prohibition?" Mick guessed, even in his inebriated state sensing that it was the perfect opportunity to find out something about the mysterious vampire's past. He would talk your ear off for hours about his rock and roll years whether you wanted to hear about it or not, but anything else was usually off limits. Liquor loosens tongues.
Shane nodded. "I crewed for William McCoy."
"Who's that?"
"You've never heard of the most famous rum runner in history? He brought booze from the Bahamas into South Florida. We ran up and down the coast all the way from Florida to Maine and back. I helped him outfit the Tomika. We refitted the fish pens, and mounted the machine gun…"
"Machine gun?!" Mick interrupted in disbelief. "You're making up stories," he accused.
"Hey, it's the truth! Look it up on Wikipedia if you don't believe me. Contraband liquor was big business in those days. Didn't you ever see the Untouchables?"
"And you worked with McCoy?" Mick prodded, checking the jug again, dismayed to see it was definitely going down.
"For a few years, until he got caught. I liked Billy, he was a decent guy. He sold only the best. He coulda watered down his liquor like most of the others did, make a bigger profit, but he took pride in his product. That's where the saying "the real McCoy comes from."
"All right, now I know you're shitting me!" Mick insisted.
"Look it up! Am I shitting him?" Shane asked Jay-Jay.
"Guess he'll have to look it up," Josef said, grinning.
"I was a seafarer back in the day, so it was right up my alley." Shane put his feet back onto the coffee table.
Josef unceremoniously yanked the boots off of Shane's feet and conked him in the head with one. "And the money to be made was phenomenal! We're talking several hundred grand a year – and that was the 20's!"
"And how do you know that?" Mick asked Josef, suspiciously. "Where you by any chance involved in illegal booze trafficking?" He said slowly, proud of himself for getting the complicated line out without slurring anything.
"Well… that was a nasty business. Mostly run by organized crime. But yeah… a few of those crime bosses were vamps."
"Oh no, not the Godfather fantasies again!" Mick groaned.
"Kiss the ring."
"You have Godfather fantasies?" Shane inquired.
"Can you get your warped mind out of the gutter?!" Josef wanted to know.
"Uh… I can try…"
"Lost cause," Josef muttered.
"Are you trying to tell me you were the head of a crime family?!" Mick couldn't decide whether to be annoyed or amused by their tall tales.
"What you never heard of the "Konstantin-Alexander family?"
Mick laughed, spraying a mouthful of moonshine across the room. "Yeah, right!"
"That was the only time we ever managed to stay in the same city together for any length of time," Shane noted.
"Those were good times," Josef remembered fondly.
"Why would that be?" Mick decided to press his luck and see if he could get anything out of them about the weird Josef-Shane dynamic.
"Jay-Jay was in the business for the money, I was in it for the excitement. It worked out perfect."
"Until that whole annoying 21st Amendment thing," Josef added.
"No one really wanted prohibition, not even the lawmen that had to enforce it. You know, afterwards the coast guard took on a lot of the ex-smugglers as non-com officers?!"
Mick was fascinated despite himself. "That's… that's…" he couldn't think of an adjective, so he fell silent.
"You remember Lola's party boat out on Rum Row?" Josef asked Shane.
"Oh, hell man, how could I forget?! Hookers for the humans, freshies for the vamps, booze flowing…"
"Lola? The Lola?" Mick demanded, forgetting all about his duty and putting the jug on the floor so he could sit forward in his chair in rapt attention.
"I told you she used to have a pirate army. In many ways this was very similar. She was right at home."
Mick stared at them in consternation. The story had gotten progressively wilder, from just being involved in illegal liquor smuggling to being a crime family. There was probably truth in there… but he had no idea which was truth and which just BS. He was reminded of a children's activity book: rock star, rum runner, (not to mention voodoo priest, but Mick didn't know about that one), Sheriff. Which one of these things isn't like the others?!
He found he could picture Lola running a smuggling operation though. And if that was true, did it mean the rest was as well?
"So there was a good time or two before rock and roll?" Josef said to Shane, kicking his foot to get his attention.
"Yeah, I suppose so," Shane conceded, but sharing a grin with him. "Or three."
Mick was chagrined when they fell silent, and wracked his brain to come up with something to keep them talking. "So um, tell me more about the smuggling thing."
Shane shrugged. "Not much else to tell. Booze became legal again, and a lot of us were out of a job. The mob turned its attention to other illegal activities, life went on."
Mick knew he was lying. "You must have tons of stories about the smuggling days."
"I thought you didn't believe us?" Shane asked.
"Maybe Mick wants a bedtime story?" Josef suggested.
"Well…" Shane said, thinking. "There were the triplets in Las Vegas. We met them at a triplet convention we crashed…"
Mick wasn't sure he wanted to hear about that one, but he wasn't quite sure why. "Um, maybe I am too young for that one. After all, I'm only fifty-six…" He grabbed the jug and clutched it protectively.
"They're so cute at that age," Shane noted.
"Was I cute at that age too?" Josef wanted to know.
Shane tried to pinch his cheek but his hand kept getting batted away. Finally, he was able to make contact. "You're still cute, Jay-Jay. In an obnoxious sorta way."
"The rest of the moonshine is mine," Mick pronounced, tipped the jug up and drinking straight from it.
"Kids today have no respect," Josef said sadly.
"They have it too easy," Shane agreed.
"Who wants a nightcap?" Josef pulled out his phone. "Tonya, Marilyn, and Candace are on call tonight, they're all delicious."
Mick stood up abruptly. "I am going home," he enunciated clearly, making an effort not to sway on his feet. He headed for the door, pulling out his cell phone to call a cab.
"One of these days, Mick St. John, I will corrupt you," Josef's voice floated behind him.
"Over my undead body," Mick countered, ignoring the laughter he left in his wake.
What do you get when you mix three vampires with one jug of moonshine? One empty jug and three drunken vamps, of course. And maybe, some truth.
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End of Chapter Seven: Boys Night In
AN: Song Shane sings is "Can You Get It When You Want It," by Paper Lace. Details about prohibition are accurate... except for the part about vampire involvement. :-)
