This chapter I feel is my strongest yet when it comes to showing off the raw emotion both characters have for each other. It is also the chapter I found my "theme" song for them. Take a listen if you want! Obviously you need to add a few things to make it a proper url code, but yeah!

www youtube watch?v=TsNmHguG5Y0

Again, this isn't proofread!


The leaves will fall
And so will you
When you do, bury me under them too
Seconds pass, we'll make it through
Eventually we all go home
It won't be long

Peter's heart was pounding so loudly in his ears he felt like the rest of Neverland could hear it. He felt as if it were shaking the ground they now crouched on as they watched Emma, Snow and Regina make their way frantically through the forest. At any second…he could swear they would hear it too and turn around and spot him and his Pirate Captain, finally reunited. "They're going to the compound," Peter said softly. He felt Hook nodding, tingling his temple with a softly bristled chin. "I can't do anything like this, not yet."

Peter felt firm hands grab at his shoulders, turning him slightly to face Hook. The pirate wore a crooked, confident smile. "I'll protect you."

Peter offered a smile, but it was reserved, and more to make the pirate stop looking at him like that… There was such devotion, such utter attachment. Was Hook always this in love with him? Peter recalled various times where there was such affection, but there was always something holding Hook back, like the dam was on the verge of exploding, but it never did…

It was cold, despite being under the covers with his lover's arms wrapped tightly around him. Sex always made the air seem cooler. Peter never understood why. Perhaps it had something to do with how sweaty the two got during the act. Sighing he pressed his back firmly against Hook's chest, feeling his chest hair tickle at his shoulder blades with each of their breaths.

"You alright?" Hook's husky voice whispered softly, as if the moon may shatter if they spoke too loud.

"Cold's all," Peter slurred sleepily. Hook pressed a soft kiss onto the boy's temple, before placing another on his cheek bone and then a final one atop his jugular vein in his neck.

"We could light a fire?" Hook suggested as he pulled more of the covers atop Peter and less on him.

Peter curled his fingers into the blankets. They were old, worn and had the very distinct smell of sweat and dirt. He'd need to take them to the river to wash them eventually. "No. I don't want to hear anything else but this."

"But what?" Hook asked as he propped his head up with one of his hands. "Me eventually snoring loudly?"

Peter turned around, to face Hook. Their faces were just mere inches away. "I can hear how much you love me, even if you hardly say it." He poked at Hook's chest, right above his heart.

Hook laughed, but it was distant and a bit hesitant. He grabbed at Peter's hand, lacing his fingers with the boy's but Peter knew better. It wasn't out of affection, it was a distraction.

"You do love me, right?" Peter asked, his soft voice barely above a whisper. The Lost Boys were sleeping all around his tree house either just under the stars, in hammocks or in small tents, but if Peter was loud enough, they could wake. Unfortunately, when Hook did a very certain thing with his tongue on a very certain spot…that seemed to happen frequently…

Hook smiled, but the light gesture didn't reach his heavy eyes. Peter laughed bitterly, sitting up, allowing for the covers to spill from his shoulders to come crumpling into his lap. His body practically glowed from the silver moonlight. "We've been together for five years, and you still can't say it?"

Hook sat up as well, sighing heavily as if he were about to embark on a journey he didn't want to have at all. "It's complicated, Pan."

"Peter," Peter said all too quickly. "You call me…Peter. They call me Pan." Familiarity had been important to Peter. For when Hook called him that, it was more intimate than calling him what he became all those years ago… It was why he never liked calling Hook anything but Killian, unless he was angry with him-which happened a lot, but still…

"Pe-ter," Hook said slowly, annunciating each syllable. "It's this whole place… I never know what day it is, what time it is. I don't know how long I've been here… Time just…" He scrunched up his face, as if he wasn't able to find the right words no matter how hard he tried.

"Time is irrelevant here. We have all the time in the world," Peter said as he scooted closer to Hook, placing a few kisses atop his cheeks, his nose, his brow…

Hook shifted away. Peter winced, feeling anger boiling in the pit of his stomach.

"You have to understand… Being with you is…"Hook hesitated. He seemed to be extremely well aware of the danger he was about to get himself into. "It's difficult."

"How? All I want to do is love you. You're the one who pushes me away."

"I'm a pirate… But I have honor. I have a code. What's your code, Peter? It's always about you. Everything has to be for you. I fight for my men, my friends… You only fight for yourself."

"And that makes you not love me?"

"It's not that I don't love you. It's that… I fear you as much as I love you."

Peter offered no evidence of being shocked. Instead, he allowed his breaking heart to shatter slowly on the inside, never changing the way his face looked, or where he hands were placed in his lap. He simple blinked a few times, looking at Hook before deciding to turn away and slip back under the covers.

"I'm sorry, Peter," Hook said.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," was all Peter said before closing his eyes and forcing sleep…even though he knew it wasn't an escape, it was a prison, for Peter Pan never dreamed in Neverland.

Hook snapped a few times in front of Peter's face, trying to pull the boy back to reality. "Peter! Helloooo?"

Peter swatted at Hook's hands in a bit of annoyance. "What?!" he hissed.

"You were staring…and you started to cry. Do you feel alright?"

'Do I feel alright? You've been the reason I've been nothing but an emotional rollercoaster all my existence… Am I alright?!' "Yes. It's Henry's heart… There's so much in it."

Hook seemed to digest that lie perfectly. "We should get you to your Thinking Tree."

Nodding, Peter moved silently behind Hook, wincing every so often as Henry's heart fed into his veins his true immortality. They had walked mostly in silence. Neverland seemed so much quieter now. Peter knew the Lost Boys were betraying him. He could hear it in the back of his mind. He knew everything that happened here. Did they honestly think he wouldn't find out? Did they honestly think they could betray him? Though, not all were so quick to change sides. Felix still remained loyal. Felix would always remain loyal. It was one of the reasons Peter had brought him to Neverland in the first place.

When they reached the tree, Peter went up into it, its vines stretching down to greet him lovingly, holding him like a mother would a child, pulling him up high into the branches where he sat alone. "Go hide! I'll be safe here!" he called down to Hook.

The pirate stalled for a moment before turning and disappearing off into the lush jungle. Alone, Peter rested his head against the tree's trunk, taking in the scent of the jungle. Though it didn't take his mind long to decide the scent of leather was much more appealing.

"I fear you as much as I love you…"

"I won't be your toy…"

"You can tell me anything you know…"

"You're a monster… Look at what you've done to me…"

Their relationship had never been all sunshine and daisies. Hook was a man that needed sunshine and daisies after the life he'd had. He needed someone to love him implicitly. Someone who didn't hurt him, or challenge him at every turn of the way. It was here in this tree… that Peter regretted loving Hook. Because when he first started to love the pirate… all he wanted was to win and when he'd won the pirate… All he wanted was to destroy him; and when he destroyed him… Peter destroyed himself.

Bloody hands pulled back from the pirate as magic barred his exit from his lover's chest cavity with the pirate's still-beating heart. Peter cried out in anger as he was forced to release the muscle, falling back onto the ground inside Skull Rock.

He didn't want to look at the man who'd fallen to his knees just a few feet away. He didn't want to hear the sobs, the soft "why's" and "how could you's." He just wanted to take his miserable failure, lick his wounds and forget this had ever happened. But that wasn't an option, so he looked up.

He saw Hook's pale face. He saw the purple circles under the pirate's eyes as he stared on at Peter with eyes that saw but did not see. He saw the subtle twitches of the man's lips, like he was on the verge of speaking, but never uttering a sound. He saw the shaking fingers and the tears coming to slide down his neck…

What had Peter done?

He stood up, looking at the blood on his hands, Killian's blood… "Killian…"

Hook didn't speak, he just shook his head, clutching his stomach like he was going to be sick. The man lost his balance and crumbled to the ground, curling up and tucking his knees under his chin.

Peter could feel the last bit of his soul drying up, and shriveling away.

He saw the soft shaking of the man's shoulders, he heard the constrained sniffles and anguished, whispered sobs.

"Ki-Killian… It wasn't… It wasn't supposed to be this way…"

The pirate never looked back.

Looking on for the last time, saving the image of the pirate, the smiles they had shared, the tears they had let dry on each other's cheeks, and the nights where all they did was hold each other. Peter turned away, looking up at the hourglass, cursing its existence.

"You all can leave Neverland… I won't stop you." He flew out one of the open cavities of the rock's face. Only then did he hear the gut-wrenching sounds of a man who had lost everything… Tears clouded Peter's vision as he fell into the ocean, feeling its icy waters rush up against his body, stabbing him like tiny little needles for all the wrongs he'd never done to Hook. He didn't want to leave the waters, but he felt hands pulling at him, and suddenly there was a canoe with Felix atop it.

"You did it?" the boy asked.

"No. I couldn't."


A/N: While I do write this mainly for my own enjoyment, I really would like to hear feedback from any of you as readers. Any of you listen to the song? Did you listen to it while reading? Did it enhance the story? Do you have any music you particularly like to listen to when reading this story? I seem to enjoy listening to classical music when I write it, always morose pieces though!