AN: So, I promised somebody that I would give them some Jesse/Rachel resolution in one of the chapters because the actual show lacked it greatly. So, that's a prominent part of this chapter, as well as Cherry, obviously. (: I just am glad everybody is enjoying this and can't wait to hear what you have to think about his chapter. Please, pretty please with sugar on top, please review. (: Y'all can't even imagine how happy I feel when I see just one response, imagine if you all responded! :D Anyways, I hope you enjoy! (:
The song had just finished. The beat was still pounding through the both of them. Was the song right? Could they have had it all? Rachel is staring in Jesse's eyes, like if she were to break eye contact he would disappear, but he was really standing in front of her. She couldn't believe he was back, after everything he'd done and he was back in McKinley's auditorium. The stood in silence for a short moment before Jesse mustered the courage to speak.
"I'm so sorry, Rachel." He said and stepped closer to her a pained expression on his face. She could tell he regretted it, just his short statement summed up everything. His hand moved to the side of her face, his rough skin awkwardly pressed against her cheek. She continued watching him as he leaned closer to her. She didn't want to pull away, afraid of hurting him more than he already was.
"For everything," he said and then he pressed his lips to her fervently, like he was trying to convince her this was right. She froze under the contact, her lips not moving against his and her hands urgently moved up to his shoulders and she pushed against him, not too hard, but enough to get him to pull away. She shook her head nervously, taking a step back out of his touch.
"Jesse, I-" And disappointment hit him the moment he heard the hurt in her voice. He cut her off with his words.
"Oh, god, you're with Finn aren't you? Oh god, I'm such an idiot." He turned away form her and started to walk towards the stairs of the stage so he could escape this situation. She walked briskly over to him, her hand catching his arm, causing him to turn around.
"No, I'm not with Finn..I just…" She trailed off, not sure what to say to him to make him feel better. It's not like she had a reason not to kiss him. She wasn't with anybody, but she felt bad. She felt like she betrayed somebody and now there was guilt over her like a cloud over her head, but the only problem with that was she had nobody to betray. Why did she feel so bad about this then?
"Just what?" he asked, growing impatient with her silence. The only thing that she could process in her mind was that her feelings for him had changed.
"I don't think I feel the same way about you that you feel about me," she said softly. He looked to the ground, feeling rejection from the girl he thought was so good for him, so much like him.
"Oh," he said simply, no other reaction from him except acceptance, which made her appreciate him more. Her vision of him had changed since he was gone, since they'd dated. She could see the guy who humiliated her, and cracked an egg on her head, who she didn't think she could fully trust. She could also see the guy who apologized and was extremely caring, and full of regret. Along with one of the few people who accepted her exactly the way she was and the pretty much canceled out his past mistakes in itself. She just didn't see him as boyfriend material, as somebody she would consider dating again. He left without saying anything to her, making her believe he didn't care at all, when he'd acted like he did. What if she gave him another chance and he did the same thing? What if he hurt her again? She didn't think she could handle the pain twice, especially not now since he seemed so genuine about his apology.
"You're a great guy, Jesse," she said and his face brightened a small amount. "And I care about you, I really do." He opened his mouth to say something else, but her confidence flowed easily as she continued. "And I know you care about me," he nodded, acknowledging the words he was just about to say. "We have so much in common: Singing, ballet, our dreams about New York, countless other things." He looked at her with focus as she tried to establish her feelings in words. "And I know similarities are vital in a relationship. But, have you ever heard the saying "Opposites attract?" He smiled sadly, realizing where she was going with this. "Well, I think that's true too."
Her mind wander to a certain timid guy she knew, that would never have had the confidence to kiss her as urgently as Jesse had, or at all. Maybe that was all that their was in their way, his reluctance to make a move. Or maybe it was just because he didn't feel the same way she did.
"Maybe," she paused choosing her words carefully. A small smile teased at her lips when she spoke again. "There's just not enough room for two stars in one relationship." She said it in an attempt to lighten the mood.
"Maybe," he said laughing lightly, understanding all of her spoken words. So she didn't want to be with him, he could deal with that. He'd done some terrible things and was just now apologizing, he understood if she still had a grudge. But, he didn't believe that was why she was saying these things, she had accepted his apology and he was grateful for that much. It just made him wonder why she had rejected him. He didn't think any thing was in their way of being together again. Though, apparently there was an obstacle for her.
She looked at him concerned for how he was feeling. She thought back to their past. The conditions under which they had met were pretty unique, pretty fantastic as well. Though that part was great, and when they were together equally as fun, she couldn't disconnect Jesse from the pain of meeting her mother who still didn't want to be there for her through him, as well as the obvious hurt he caused himself. She could see doing the things they used to do, going to shows, hanging out, having coffee. Why couldn't she maintain a friendship with Jesse after they got past their history? She could tell he was upset, his head dropped almost in shame but more embarrassment from trying to get a kiss from her.
"You know," she said slowly causing him to look up at her. She now had a wide smile. "I still need a date to prom," she said surprised that statement was still true. She'd hoped somebody would ask her before now, one person in particular, but maybe she had to just take a chance herself. His face lit up and he responded quickly.
"Rachel, I would love to take you to prom." He said excitement coursing through him.
"As friends," she clarified with a knowing glance.
"As friends," he replied, knowing the boundaries he had. He put his arm out for her and she happily slipped her arm through his as they left the school.
Jesse gave her a ride home and when she hit the landing of her stairs she bounded up them quickly. She got to her room, closing her door behind her, sure not to slam it so her dads wouldn't be worried. She grabbed her phone quickly and dialed the familiar numbers before she hesitated.
"What am I going to say?" She asked herself, suddenly wondering why she was about to call Mike in the first place. Well, you tell friends everything, and she thought it was a very important thing that Jesse was back. She paced back in forth in her room rehearsing statements she was considering saying to Mike.
"Oh, hey Mike, Jesse came back into town. We're going to prom together," she said with a cheesy smile and held the phone to her ear like she was actually talking to him. She shook her head and lowered the phone, turning it over in her hands. She thought for a moment before raising it back to the side of her face.
"Hi, Mike. So, you'll never guess who showed up today?" Who? She thought, plugging in what she would hope for him to say. "Jesse! Crazy, I know, right?" Her laugh was phony as it joined her question. Didn't he just abandon you? "Well, yeah. But now he's back and you'll never guess. We're going to prom together." She imagined what his response would be but couldn't quite pick how he would react. "As friends," she added to the end of her statement quickly, knowing she would really need to clarify that for Mike. She groaned and fell back on to her bed in a huff. She decided to just wing it, she'd had her fair share of time practicing improv. She pressed the green button, initiating the phone call.
Mike was standing in his kitchen when he felt his phone vibrating in his back pocket. He checked the name and smiled answering the call and put the phone between his ear and his shoulder as he moved through some of the cabinets looking for a specific container.
"Hey, Rach," he said and the words she had rehearsed slipped from her mind, so even if she had decided on something to say she wouldn't have remembered it. She stayed silent, not sure why she was waiting to say something else, but her thoughts were broken by his voice.
"What's up?" He said standing up on his toes to look up in the very top cabinet still not finding what he was looking for.
"Oh, well. I sort of wanted to talk to you about prom." She said nervously, her heart beating wildly in her chest.
"Oh, really?" He said with a smirk she couldn't see, but she could hear in his words. He'd found the vase he was looking for and sat it down in the sink. He turned the water on and watched it fill up partially and shut the water off before she responded.
"Yeah, uhh..I sort of have a date." She said finally dropping the news, feeling like she'd dropped a weight as well. This weight must have passed straight through the phone to Mike because, her news hit him square in the chest. He dropped the bundle of flowers he held in his hands into the vase that now contained the water he specifically poured for that purpose. His eyes flashed over the note attached that read:
Rachel Berry,
Would you make me the happiest guy in William McKinley High, and go to junior prom with me?
- Mike Chang
"Umm, that's great," he said, trying to sound happy for her, before he felt a twinge of envy in him. "Who is it?" He asked, wanting to put a name to the guy who had gotten to her first.
"Oh it's Jesse," she said biting her lip contemplating an explanation. After a short moment of him not responding, still in shock, she continued. "He came back in town and we've worked things out. So, since nobody asked me yet, " And he was already feeling regret. "We're going…together." Her statement ended there until she remembered a single thing from what she practiced. "As friends," she tacked on urgently.
Her after thought only helped ease Mike's feelings minutely. He was going to ask Rachel to prom this afternoon, making him just a few hours late. He'd finally worked up the courage to take this step. He had planned to ask her to coffee, leave the flowers by the register so as she walked up to see him, like she always did, she would notice them. Her eyes wouldn't be able to help but wander to the card where the personalized note was. He would act like he had no idea what she was talking about when she wanted him to turn around. He would already have a Caramel Macchiato in hand, something that had become a trademark of their friendship. Then, she would say yes to him. He would pick her up and spin, and maybe…maybe, just kiss her.
But, he was wrong. He was all wrong. That wasn't how it was going to happen.
"I'm happy for you, Rach," he said letting jealousy seep into his tone, which she had a hard time recognizing. She smiled at his response, seeing at his genuine, and she was glad he was happy because if he was she could be too.
"Thanks, Mike," He felt a pain wash over him. He couldn't stay on the phone longer with her, if he did he would be tempted to just tell her everything right there, and that wasn't the way to do it, not when he was this angry.
"Umm, I need to go, Rach. I'll talk to you later?" He said and took a deep breath, trying to keep himself composed while on the phone with her. She was surprised at his notion to get off the phone so soon, there conversations were never this short.
"Sure, Mike. Talk to you later." She replied and waited for him to respond before realizing he'd already hung up.
In his kitchen, he was furious with himself. Furious for waiting so long. For not telling her. For everything. He yanked the flowers out of the vase roughly, specifically grabbing the note and tearing it in half before literally throwing it and the flowers into the trash. He kicked the counter with all of his force, his anger focused on that one point where his foot connected with the wood.
What the hell was he supposed to do now?
"If I didn't know you I'd rather not know. If I couldn't have you I'd rather be alone "
AN: Sooo, tell me what you think! :D
