Chapter Seven: Steady Hands


Bella's POV

"Thanks again for dinner." Edward smiled again as he helped Caroline into her sweater. "Brady was right, they were better than Taco Bell."

"Thanks," I blushed. "My secret is...real ground beef."

"Ah, the real stuff." He laughed as he pulled his own sweatshirt on. "Anyway...we should do this again sometime."

"I'd like that." I whispered, trying not to lose myself in his beautiful eyes. I hadn't really looked at another guy since Jake and I started dating, and that was ten years ago. But, Edward was something else. He was just plain...handsome. His hair was a shaggy golden-brown, his eyes were bright green, and he had just enough stubble to make him hot.

"Yeah, so..." He sighed awkwardly as he shoved his hands in his pockets. "Bye."

"See you." I smiled as I opened the front door for them. I watched as he opened the back door for Caroline to get in and once I heard the car starting, I shut the door. I turned around to see Brady standing there, looking up at me with one eyebrow raised. "Don't you have homework to finish?"

"Mom, we did that all before we went to the park." He sighed, rolling his eyes at me. "Are you and Edward like...do you like have a crush on him or something?""

"A crush on him?" I asked, and my voice got squeaky. Brady was a lot more observent than I thought. "No, buddy. I do not have a...crush on Edward."

"You're beat red." He pointed out. "And, your voice is all weird."

"Brady, I think it's time you get in the shower and get ready for bed." I sighed, pointing to the upstairs. He gave up and went upstairs and it wasn't until I heard the shower turn on did I open the bottle of wine I kept for occasions like this. Just plain, old life.

Life at twenty-eight shouldn't be this difficult. I shouldn't be going through a divorce, I should be just starting my life with my husband. I shouldn't already have a nine year old..I should be just starting my family. I loved Brady and I wouldn't trade him for the world, but life was hard enough. A nine year old and an ex-husband didn't help things.

So, I did what I always did when I was alone and confused and called my mommy. She answered the first ring and I almost burst into tears at the sound of her voice.

"Bella, sweetie what's wrong?" She asked, her voice soothing.

"I don't know." I sighed, trying to keep it together. "I love my son."

"I know that." She whispered. "And, you know that."

"But I wanna date." I admitted. "I wanna go to the bar with my friends and meet someone. I wanna get dressed up and go on a date. I haven't done that since college mom, and I miss it."

"You knew there would be things you had to give up when you decided to keep Brady."

"When I had Brady, I had Jake too." I sighed. "I miss him, mom. I know we weren't perfect for each other, but I loved him. And I know you have your issues, but he was so good to me in the beginning and I miss that."

"Baby, you made a choice that you thought was right." She pointed out. "Are you regretting this now?"

"No," I asnwered honestly. "It wasn't fair to either of us by staying married. I know that and I think he does too. But, I'm new at the whole single mom thing and I wanna date."

"Bella, did you happen to meet someone?"

"What?" I asked.

"You haven't spoken of dating at all since you and Jake seperated." She pointed out. "Now, all of a sudden, your divorce is almost final and your blabbering about wanting to date again."

"Well, I do." I shrugged.

"Yes, but who?" She asked. She knew me better than I did and I knew there was no hiding this from her. "Bella?"

"His name is Edward." I answered. "He has a daughter in Brady's class, and his wife died in labor and it's been him and his daughter since."

"Wow, sad."

"Yeah."

"Why are you just meeting him if his daughter and Brady are in the same class?"

"She's new to the school." I explained. "He owns a music store and the other day, there was a shipment of something coming in and he was the only one who could sign for it. Brady and I ran into his daughter, Caroline, and I offered to watch her until he could get there."

"Oh, so you know the daughter?"

"Yeah." I answered. "Brady and her played in the park today while Edward and I talked."

"Did you feed them your famous taco's?"

"Yes?"

"Honey, he isn't going anywhere." She laughed. "If I were you, Bella, I'd ease into it. Like you said, you haven't dated since college and if his wife died in labor, chances are he hasn't dated in a long time either."

"They were high school sweethearts." I sighed.

"Then he's been out of dating longer than you have." She laughed. "Anyway, be his friend for right now. Have Caroline and Brady be friends. If it's meant to be, it'll work out."

"Where did you get all this wisdom?" I asked.

"I've lived a long time, kid." She sighed. "And, I raised you and Jasper. It comes with the territory of motherhood I guess."

"Then, where's my wisdom?" I asked.

"It's there, you just have to find it."

After two glasses of wine, I finally hung up with my mother feeling much better. I went into Brady's room and smiled at him peacefully sitting in bed, reading a comic book. With a nine year old boy, a mother prayed for these moments and never took them for granted. He looked up and smiled as he scooted over. I didn't tuck him into bed since he was too old for that, but we still had our nightly routine.

"So, what do you want to accomplish tomorrow?" I asked. I never wanted Brady to be without a goal and I asked him this every night. Even if it was just to finish a homework assignment in school, it was a goal to reach. A small one, but I didn't care. I just wanted him always to be working towards something.

"Hmmmm," He pondered. "I want a good grade on my reading test." He sighed since he'd had trouble with Shiloh. "Oh, and I want Caroline to make some friends that are girls."

"She hasn't made any yet?" I asked since she'd been there for a good amount of time.

"I mean, she has but she keeps following me." He told me. "I like her and all, but I don't want her following me everywhere. Sometimes, a guy just needs time to himself."

"Where did you learn that?" I asked him wide eyed. I didn't want Brady having those thoughts. Not yet anyway.

"I don't know, dad maybe." He shrugged. Obviously. Whenever there was something I didn't want Brady knowing or saying, Jake was the one to teach it to him. "Plus, I think girls and boys need to have different friends. You know?"

"Yeah, bud." I smiled.

"Like, I'll be friends with her, but she needs to sit with the girls." He sighed. "Henry's starting to ask me questions."

"She's only been there a few days." I laughed.

"Still, Mom." He rolled his eyes. I could already tell those teenage years were going to be oh so fun.

"So, how are things at your dad's place?" I asked since he'd just gotten back from spending the week with him. He always came home with a smile on his face, but he was never begging to go back. I couldn't decided if that was a good thing or not.

"It's good." He lied. He was playing with the hem of his shirt and he wasn't looking at me. There were a lot of things Brady got from me, and his ability to lie was one of them. He simply couldn't lie.

"Brady, you know you can tell me anything, right?" I asked, grabbing his face and turning it to look at me. "Always, sweetie."

"I love going to dad's and I love spending time with him, but at the end of the week...I miss you." He said, trying to fight me to get away. "Dad's really fun, but...eating takeout gets old, you know? I miss your good food."

"Oh, so it's my cooking you miss?" I laughed. "Well, I can help with the dinner situation, but other than that is everything okay?"

"Yeah," He nodded and this time he was telling the truth. "Dad wants to take me trick-or-treating."

"He does?" I asked. Jake had always stayed home to hand out candy since it always rained on Halloween and he hated getting stuck in the rain. He didn't like being wet or cold. I knew he was doing this so I couldn't have Brady on Halloween.

"Yeah, but I don't wanna go if you aren't there so will you come with us?" He asked. "With Henry. And Seth."

"Sure, buddy." I sighed. I know he was nine, but he was cunning. He was just trying to get Jake and I together doing something as a family again. Brady was never going to stop and I had to deal with the fact that the three of us were a family and Brady wouldn't stop until we were under one roof. "Why don't you ask Caroline?"

"I'm sure she has her own friends, mom." He huffed.

"You just said she didn't have any girl friends to go with."

"Not at my school." He sighed. "But, she just moved schools. She has old friends, mom."

"Okay, well we'll talk about this in the morning." I smiled, leaning over and kissing the top of his head. "Goodnight, Brady-bear."

"Mom." He wined, even though I saw him cracking a smile. "Night."

I got up and turned off his light for him and closed the door. And then, I was alone. I couldn't decide what to do. I'd already had a glass of wine and I knew whatever was on TV was something I'd already seen. So, I decided to pick up a dusty book from the shelf and begin reading.

It was a book Jake had suggested to me right before Brady was born and I was halfway done when I went into labor. I hadn't touched it since. I grabbed a blanket and plopped down on the couch and opened to page one.

This was my life as a single mom. And it was boring.


The next day was the same it always was. I got Brady up and fed and took him to school. The only surprise was I ran into Edward on the way back to my car.

"Hi, Bella." He smiled. He looked so...broken. But, he didn't look like he was going to fall apart. He looked strong for his daughter, but there was definatly missing. I could see how much he missed his wife, but how much he missed having an adult around to talk to. I could relate and I hadn't been alone for as long as he had.

"Hey," I smiled. "How's Caroline doing in school?" I asked stupidly since we'd talked about their school for about half an hour last night.

"Same as last night." He laughed. "But,she told me last night at home that a another girl just moved here and they were going to sit together today.

"That's great, Edward."

"So, what's on the agenda today?" He asked as he kicked a rock that wasn't actually there.

"I have an article to edit, but after that I'm free as a bird." I explained. "I might go help my brother pick out some baby things."

"When's the baby due?" He asked.

"She's about three and a half months along." I sighed. "What are you up to?"

"Running the store." He laughed. "I'm training another employee today so hopefully, my assistant manager can be more of my assistant than a salesman."

"That sounds like a good plan."

"But, I was just going to get a cup of coffee, would you like to join me?" He asked and I nearly froze where I was. I hadn't been asked out for coffee since Jasper told me he was asking Alice to marry him...and he was my brother for god sake. But, this was Edward. It wasn't like it meant something other than...getting a cup of coffee.

"That'd be great, thanks." I smiled. I jumped in my car and followed him to the local Starbucks. When I ordered my drink and pulled out my wallet, though, he swatted my hand away and handed the clerk his card. "You didn't have to do that."

"Maybe not, but I was raised to be a gentleman." He smiled, as he genstured to an open table. I took the seat across from him and just looked into his beautiful green eyes. "I always pay, even if I'm with my mother or sister-in-law."

"Does Caroline get her eyes from her mother?" I blurted out, catching him completely off guard. "Because hers are so blue and you have...green eyes."

"Yeah, Rosalie had blue eyes." He sighed, looking down sadly at his coffee cup. "Caroline only got her hair color from me. Nothing else."

"Oh come on, I bet she gets a lot from you."

"Yeah, my attitude." He snickered. "But, looking at her...she's the spitting image of Rosalie." He sighed, looking back up at me. Our eyes locked for just a second, but that second sent me reeling. "It actually makes it hard sometimes."

"Why?" I asked.

"Because looking at Caroline, I see Rosalie." He said, giving me a sad smile. "I love Caroline, but when I see Rosalie in her...it makes me miss her and then I feel guilty."

"Guilty?"

"Because, I let my mind wonder to the...what if's." He explained. "What if Rosalie hadn't gotten pregnant? If Caroline hadn't been born, would Rosalie be alive."

"It's natural to have thoughts like that." I whispered. "Just because you miss your wife, doesn't make you love Caroline less."

"I still shouldn't have those thoughts."

"Maybe not, but I see the way you look at that little girl." I smiled. "It's clear that she's everything to you and you'd take a bullet for her. And, don't even get me started on the way she looks up at you. She adores you Edward."

"She is a good one, huh?"

"For sure." I laughed, easing the tension. "So, what's she going to be for halloween?"

"She wants to be Hermione from Harry Potter." He laughed. "My mom knitted her a scarf with the Gryffindor colors, and Caroline declared she was going to be Hermione for Halloween."

"That's sweet."

"Yeah, it was." He smiled. "Even though this was Thanksgiving of last year...so we'd just gotten done with Halloween." He laughed. "What about Brady?"

"Brady's going to be the Tin Man from The Wizard of Oz." I laughed. "Most boys wanna be Superman...my boy wanted to be something covered in metal and walk around."

"I think that's awesome." He shrugged. "Mean's he isn't following the crowd."

"Oh no, I'm glad for that. I just think it's kind of...random." I said. "Especially since he's only seen the movie twice when he was younger."

"What are your plans for trick-or-treating?" He asked.

"Brady cunningly got Jake and I to both take him, even though Jake's never been there before. Even when Brady was little, he hated trick-or-treating." I explained. "Brady invited a few of his friends, but Caroline is welcome to join us."

"Thanks, but the two of us always spend Halloween with my parents and I take her trick-or-treating around the neighborhood I grew up in." I smiled. "And where Rosalie spent a lot of time."

"That sounds like a lot of fun." I smiled. "Where do they live?"

"They live in Forks." He told me. "It's about three and a half hours from here and it's a really small town. But, I loved it there growing up and the time Rosalie lived there, she told me it was perfect."

"You two didn't grow up together?"

"No, she moved to Forks when we were freshman in high school." He explained. "But, it didn't seem to matter how long we knew each other. We fell in love and got married real soon after."

"When you love someone, time has no meaning." I shrugged.

"What about you?" He asked. "How old were you when you met Brady's father?"

"Eighteen." I sighed. "Pregnant by nineteen. So, as you can tell...I'm as dumb as they come."

"Hey, maybe it didn't work out for the long run...but you and his father made it for as long as you could." He smiled. "Ten years is a long time for a relationship, especially when there's a kid involved and you were young when you got pregnant."

"I guess,"

"And if it helps, Brady adores you too." He said with a smile I just couldn't resist. "I can tell how much he loves you, and by the looks of it you're doing a hell of a job."

After another half an hour, Edward declared it was time to get back to work and that meant, returning to reality. I watched as he drove away and I realized, it was going to be impossible to stay away from him.

Edward was everything I wanted in a guy. He was smart, ambitious, strong, good looking. And, he was also a single dad which made my life easier because he already liked kids and knew what it was life. I didn't know how far this would go because I wasn't sure how far he was willing to let it go, but I realized then just how much I wanted it.

I wanted Edward.