Sirius
"I expected more from you Mr. Lupin." McGonigal scolded and Sirius felt worse then when she'd gone off on him just a few minutes prior.
She'd told Sirius that just because he was in Gryffindor instead of Slytherin, didn't mean that he had to do everything in his power to prove that 'he was capable of acting with out a hint of a thought'. And how did he feel about having let his house down so greatly?
She'd told James that she would be writing his parents and that they would be very disappointed to hear what he'd done and how he'd strung all his friends into causing such mayhem with him. "I'm not talking about you Mr. Black, I'm perfectly aware that you where leading the charge alongside Mr. Potter. I was referring to Mr. Lupin and Mr. Pettigrew. Which leads me on to you Mr. Pettigrew-"
She'd told Peter that he didn't need to do everything the other told him and that he should learn to stand up form himself. Peter got of easy, if you asked Sirius.
And then it was Remus's turn. She'd left him for last, because he was the one she was most disappointed with. "Some of the other Professors thought I shouldn't make you Prefect this year, but I insisted. Your actions reflect badly not only on yourself, but on me as well."
"I'm so sorry Professor. We all are." Remus said but made no attempt to explain or defend himself. Sirius knew that he was probably blaming himself, which was stupid since it had been him that had initiated it all in the first place.
"It's my fault Professor." Sirius spoke up. "Remus was just doing what I asked him to."
"I do not doubt that that is true, but Mr. Lupin should have known not to listen. In fact he should have done more to stop you, if not come directly to me."
Sirius felt a pang of guilt knowing that Remus would never go to McGonigal or any other Professor to tell them what the Marauders where up to. He would rather find himself in this exact situation over and over again then betray his friends. And how often had his friends showed him how much they appreciated it? Maybe James and Peter had, but Sirius certainly hadn't.
They where all sent to back to the Gryffindor tower having each lost 50 points and gained 16 detentions. On top of that Sirius had gained the overwhelming sense of guilt that came with realising that he didn't do enough for Remus.
He figured he might try to rectify the situation by talking to Remus and asking him if there where any way he could possibly make up for all the crap he'd had to deal with because of Sirius. But Sirius was a bit of a coward as far as dealing with heavy topics was concerned so he decided not to do anything before he'd had a chance to talk to James about it, in private.
"Can you explain what we're doing in a bloody broom cupboard?" James hissed, clearly still upset about what went down in McGonigals office. Or Lilly. Sirius couldn't be sure.
"I feel bad."
"That's why we're in here?" James wasn't happy. "Merlin's flaccid prick, Sirius, I feel bad too. And I've honestly got better things to do than through a pity party in a broom cupboard. I need to send an Owl to my parents explaining that the situation isn't as bad as it seams, even though it definitely is. And I need to try to apologise to Lilly, after I figure out just how I'm going to do that exactly. I mean what am I supposed to say to her? How can I possibly-"
"And we need to make things right with Remus." Sirius cut him off.
"What are you on about?"
"I mean we should somehow let Remus know that we appreciate him for never turning us in and that we know it's difficult being our friend but we're glad that he is anyway."
"He knows that." James sighed, obviously wanting to get this talk over with as soon as possible.
"I know he does. But we should tell him anyway. I recon it would be nice for him to hear it."
"I've already told him."
"What? When?" Sirius couldn't believe James would try and make things right with Remus with out him.
"When he got his Hogwarts letter. I told him that I understand how difficult it's going to be playing Prefect while also being a Marauder and that I wouldn't hold it against him if he ever decided not to take part in one of our pranks. He knows okay? Can I go now?" James was growing more and more irritated with every word so Sirius just nodded and watched as he through the door open and stormed out of the cupboard, but didn't make any move to follow him. If what James said had been true, then James had made sure Remus felt comfortable and appreciated long before Sirius even realised that that might be an issue, which made Sirius feel that much worse.
With James clearly out of the picture the only thing left to do was go find Peter so that the two of them could confirm everything James had said to Remus.
The only problem with that plan was, once Sirius had found Peter seated at an empty table in the library, books staked on top of each other in piles around him, he found out that Peter was very much on the same page as James.
"What do you mean he already knows?" Sirius demanded.
"I mean I told him after he got his Hogwarts letter that I wouldn't hold Marauder Remus accountable for anything Prefect Remus had to do. At least not for too long." Peter explained. He was in the middle of an ancient runes essay and didn't deem the conversation important enough to look up from the textbook his nose was buried in.
"Really?" Sirius couldn't believe it. Even bloody Peter had been a better friend then him.
"Of course. Once I realised that James had done so I figured it best if I tell him too." Okay, so there was still the hope that Peter had only gone and declared his unwavering friendship for Remus because James had done it. But Sirius suspected that maybe he was just grasping at any sign that he wasn't the worst friend in the Marauders. And unfortunately it looked very much like he was.
"Fuck. What am I supposed to do?" Sirius sighed, letting himself down on one of the seats at Peter's table.
"About what?" Peter asked, still not looking up from his homework which was fair enough, because Sirius never got around to answering the question anyway.
He got distracted by Marleen McKinnon who was seated two tables down. She looked nice (she always looked nice) with her hair tied up in a messy bun which appeared to be held up with a twig of some sort. The shirt she was wearing looked as though it was the tiniest bit too small, but had a fair bit of use in it anyway. An old shirt maybe? Perhaps the house elves had been too busy cleaning up the Halloween mess to worry about the Hufflepuffs laundry? What ever the reason, Sirius liked the way it clung to her body, but that wasn't what had caught his attention. It was the way that she kept looking around, as if searching for somebody that had drawn his eye. That and the rather terribly folded white shirt on the table in front of her. He could tell just by looking at it, that it would be much to big for her, in fact, it probably belonged to a man. Which could mean only one thing, Marleen had had sex and was now returning the shirt. And Sirius would never forgive himself if he didn't wait it out to see who'd come to claim it.
He was expecting to be disappointed to see that it was no other than McKinnon's Slytherin boyfriend, Alexander what's-his-face. What he definitely wasn't expecting was to see no other that Remus John that bloody scoundrel Lupin walk in and take a seat next to her.
"How are you?" Sirius could just barley hear Remus say but McKinnon answered too quietly for Sirius to successfully eavesdrop, and much to his dismay Remus continued the conversation in an equally hushed whisper. Oh how Sirius wished he could read lips.
A bit into the conversation Remus put his hand on McKinnon's and that's when Sirius had enough. He needed to do something to protect her honour. She had a boyfriend after all. Pushing his chair back noisily, Sirius stood dramatically and made his way over to where his best friend was seated with the fittest bird at Hogwarts. With out waiting for an invitation he took a seat on Remus's other side.
"Please leave, McKinnon. I need to talk to Remus."
"Pardon?" McKinnon looked at Sirius like he was crazy.
"I asked you to please leave."
"I was here first." She said but stood up anyway, making no effort to hide her look of repulsion. "Ugh. I don't know why you insist on being friends with him, Remus." And then she was gone.
"That was incredibly rude." Remus said looking at Sirius with a furrow between his eyebrows. "Even for you're standards."
"Oh don't bee so dramatic, I came here to say sorry."
"Maybe you shouldn't have chased her off then. Difficult to apologise to someone who isn't here."
"What?" It took Sirius a moment to realise that Remus though he'd come over to apologise to McKinnon. "No, I mean say sorry to you."
"To me? I'm not the once who thought all my clothes where turning into flesh eating bugs because of your potion."
"My potion? We all helped to make- Hang on." Everything fell into place suddenly. "Is that why she had your shirt? That's why you where half naked when I found you."
"Yes. It's because-"
"You and McKinnon shagged last night while the rest of us where suffering delusions." Sirius wasn't sure weather to be irritated or impressed.
"What?!" Remus almost raised his voice past a whisper. "How thick are you? No I did not sleep with Marleen. I wouldn't do that to you. Or her boyfriend for that matter. She just happened to loose some of her clothing through out the night and I figured I'd lend her my shirt before she fell victim to perverts like yourself."
"Really?" Sirius smirked. "How much clothing."
"Ugh." Remus groaned, grabbing his shirt and standing up, ready to leave.
"Wait." Sirius grabbed hold of Remus's wrist. "I still need to apologise, remember?"
"Fine." Remus sat back down. He was much to patient for his own good. "What exactly is it that you're apologising for?"
"Taking you for granted." Sirius explained. He hadn't planed to do this on his own. He'd hoped that James and Peter would be there with him and that all of them could admit to being shitty friends together. But alas, James and Peter where really good friends, who cared and all that crap.
"That potion really messed with your brain, huh?" Remus teased, clearly not even realising that Sirius had been unappreciative. It offered up a perfect escape. He could just say 'yeah, the potion was still making his mind blurry' and leave and Remus would be none the wiser. But he doubted that that would alleviate him of the guilt he was feeling.
"No, I mean yes it did, but that's not the point. The point is that you could have ratted us out to McGonigal or refused to brew the potion, but you didn't."
"Of course not. As utterly stupid as I find the things you guys do, you're still my friends. I would never betray your trust by going to McGonigal."
"I know that. I know that you never would and I just want you to know that I really appreciate you for that. It's noble. Especially since you've got that massive stick up your arse."
"Sirius-" Remus warned, letting Sirius know that he wasn't opposed to just getting up and walking away, like he'd almost done a few moments prior.
"Sorry. Sorry. I just mean, you're just a decent person and I know you don't like breaking the rules, so it must be hard to be our friend sometimes but you do it anyway, and you do it much better than me at least so I'd just like to say sorry for, you know, never really appreciating that before."
"What do I do better than you?"
"You know, the friend thing?" Sirius looked down at his hands. He wasn't sure why, but admitting that he wasn't the best friend he could be made him really uneasy.
"What are you on about? You accepted me even though I'm a werwolf, didn't you? That's more then I ever expected from a friend." Remus said, even more quietly then he had been talking so far. Was this conversation making him uncomfortable too? Sirius couldn't see why it would but when he looked up at Remus he too was looking down, playing with on of the buttons on the shirt McKinnon had left behind, and he only ever fidgeted like that when he was nervous or uncomfortable. It was definitely time for a topic change.
"So you got to see McKinnon's bra then?"
"No." Remus said. And before Sirius could figure out just what that 'no' meant, Remus was leaving, probably to avoid talking about McKinnon's breasts. The boy honestly was much to pure.
