Disclaimer: If asked, I will deny that I ever had difficulty grating cheese in my entire life. I will be lying, but there is a reason I buy it pre-shredded now...
Thanks again to everyone reading!!! I'm behind again in my responses, but I had a few minutes to get this posted.
As Leia settled into a deep sleep, the vivid imagery that her dreams composed began to take over. The fragmented pictures overlapped one another and were filled with the moments of her life. All swirling, the bright beautiful images were always overtaken by the more deeply etched horrific events she had witnessed. Worse yet, were the events as she imagined they happened. The last moments of Alderaan and her perception of their unfolding haunted her the most. Her dreams were lucid and she constantly tried to focus on the peaceful serenity that lay behind the horror, for if she was to be trapped by a dream, she fought for it to be in a better place. But she had no control, only the consciousness that her mind made up these awful things. This was her punishment to herself. She had been earnestly trying to deal with her feelings of revenge and even her hatred, but she could not let go of the guilt. And, as a result, little by little she was letting go of herself.
She ran, she drifted, was pushed and would fall all within the confines of her dream. Wake up…wake up…wake up… She watched her loves ones come and go, sometimes appearing angry with her for her failures and sometimes trying to tell her it was all right. She dreamed of her father, her mothers, Luke and Vader. She dreamed of Han. That was the image she'd been trying hardest to hold on to, and in her waking hours that realization made her feel selfish and more guilty, even if it was only a dream.
Wake up…wake up…wake up… She woke abruptly and sat straight up. She was sweaty, shaking and out of breath. But she didn't scream this time, nor would she allow herself to cry. Not here, not with Han so close. He'd almost caught her a few times. He'd seen her drunk and had been the one to get her that way on all but two of the occasions it had happened. He'd seen her injuries on board the Falcon after her rescue. And Force knows, he'd seen her angry on several occasion for which, of course, often enough he could also take credit for. She would not cry and didn't get up until she was sure the urge had passed.
Han was sitting at the large computer consol in the lounge. He was wearing a headset, but still immediately took notice when Leia entered. "Hey, sleeping beauty, you hungry?"
"How long was I asleep?"
"About three hours." And he thought she looked like she could use more, but after they ate. He stood up and pulled the headset off, sauntered over to her and took her by the hand as they went to the galley. "Come on. You can help, Princess. You haven't been around to burn anything lately…"
Since she was so hungry she let that one slide. Unfortunately, he was right on the mark on that one.
Chewie was just finishing up his slab of meat, barley warm and extremely undercooked meat of some kind, when Han and Leia walked in to the galley. He was thrilled to see Leia and lifted her up in a big Wookie embrace to prove it. "Princess, it's always good to have you on board." Then, as she almost squirmed out he pulled her back in his big fury arms, which made her laugh even louder. Despite her initial comparison to carpet, she was found of him and found to him to be deceptively gentle. She feigned defeat, then he leaned down and wolfed in a rather low key way, "Han especially enjoys it."
Chewie dropped the Princess back to her feet when Han hurled what was left of the nearly raw meat at his head. The look on Han's face said clearly, that Chewie was lucky Leia didn't understand hardly any Wookie at all. But seeing Leia laugh so easily, it was quickly forgotten.
Getting the situation back under control, Han wiped down the counter and grabbed an armful items from the refrigerator. He placed a brick of cheese in front of Leia and asked her to shred it, handing her the grater.
She smiled sweetly and easily complied. That was one of the things that she enjoyed most about being around Han. He made her feel special by not treating her like she was so different from everyone else. As much as she cared for Luke, being around Han was a completely different feeling. Not as comfortable as being with Luke, but definitely exciting in a way she wasn't sure was appropriate.
"So, how did you convince General Rieekan that you should be the one to escort me to Pantolomin?"
"What makes you think that I, Captain Selfish I think it was, would volunteer to do anymore than I have to."
He could be so cutely innocent when he wanted, she observed. "One, you're being paid, and two, Pantolomin is a resort planet, right?"
"Right."
"With casino's I presume?" Her eyebrows gently arched awaiting his response.
"Yes." Then he tried to look genuinely insulted, but the sweetness in his voice suggested otherwise. "Just a hazard of the job."
They laughed again and she was starting to relax in spite of the way she felt just a little while ago. She had been shredding as they talked, but looking down she noticed that her cheese was not shredding and the side of he grater was turning milky. Completely perplexed, she asked, "Han, what's wrong with this?"
He stepped a little closer and placing his hand over hers, turned the grater around so that the sharp side was now the one she was sliding the cheese across. Then he took her other hand in his and slowly slid the cheese across with her. The little strings now fell into the bowl. He did all this very deliberately and with his eyes wide looking at her.
"Oh." That's all she could get out. She had never been so completely embarrassed in her life. At least, not that she could remember.
He thought right that second, that had to be the most incredibly silly, sexiest thing he'd ever seen. Not just from Leia, but from any woman. He put his arm around her shoulders and laughed.
Leia, for her part, thought that was the most attractive laugh she'd ever heard.
