Title: Of Wildwood Flowers and Whiskey
Summary: Here's to the long nights that came with smooth Tennessee whiskey and love that was sweet as wine. To wildwood flowers that hid us in the moonlight, from ourselves and each other. Chibs/OFC.
A/N: Hello all! So sorry I abandoned you for a while! I completely got distracted by roleplaying forums and RL! Here's a really long one with some smut to make up for everything. IF YOU DO NOT LIKE SMUT- PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS CHAPTER! Also, I know that Erin a real big bitch! Like I said before- I do not like Mary Sue/"perfect" characters. No one is perfect, plus the drama makes for much better writing and reading. My apologies for any mistakes in this chapter- I rushed to get this one out to you all!
Thanks to DarylDixon'sLover, nhetrick, and sillykitty6800 for all of the support.
Chapter Seven: Another Time
Erin felt the cool wind wrap itself around her. Her hair was flowing behind her, snapping in the wind, the wildwood flowers knee high. Chibs smiled, following behind her. She led them to a clearing, the moon lighting the dark night. When she found flat land, she stopped, reaching into her bag and beginning to empty its contents.
She laid a blanket out on the ground and turned to face Chibs, who was low on the ground, trying to start a fire. He used a flint on his keychain to light one, grabbing some small sticks from nearby to keep it going. "So this is where the magic happens, eh?" He asked, smirking. Erin shrugged and laughed.
"I wouldn't say magic, but this is where dreams do come true," she joked, sitting down on the blanket and stretching out. He watched as she crossed her legs at her ankles and placed her arms behind her head, propping herself up to look up at the stars. He looked over at her toned stomach and felt a pull in the bottom of his stomach, an urge telling him to touch her. He shook his head to clear it, walking away from the fire and laying down next to her.
"Tell me something about yourself. Something that'll put it all into perspective for me. Why should I love a man like you?" She asked, opening the bottle of liquor and taking a sip from it. As he pondered her question, he realized that she shouldn't love him. He didn't deserve Fiona's love either; let alone Kerianne's affection. Chibs reached inside his shirt and pulled out his prayer beads- running his fingertips along the smooth finish. He had become the stereotypical man that hid behind his religion. He would do his deeds, and then pray for forgiveness. Pray for some type of peace.
He exhaled slowly, feeling the confession slip slowly out from between his lips. "He died right in my arms. I couldn't even save him. Do you know how many bastards I've saved that didn't deserve to live? But this kid- this innocent child, he deserved to live. But he died because of us!" He felt his voice shake as he finally spoke the words that were in his mind. The ones that were driving him mad. Erin nodded slowly, her eyes finding his. "Do you hear that? The crickets? The wind? Nature? Absolute silence? That's the world- finally on your side. Even if it's just for this one moment," she whispered, sitting up and handing him the bottle.
Chibs gladly accepted, needing the courage to feel the strong emotions she was dragging out of him. He was shocked when he felt her arms wrap around his shoulders and hold him tight. They sat like that for a while, until the fire went out and the moonlight was their only source of light. It was comforting to know that for once, someone or something was on his side. He didn't need to fight, he just needed to exist and let it in.
He turned towards her, guiding her hands to his chest. Chibs kissed her gently, the smell of smoke and whiskey comforting him. A soft wind brought the sweet smell of wildwood flowers towards him and reminded him that he was currently free. Erin moaned as Chibs entangled his hands in her hair and pulled gently.
"You should never love a man like me," he mumbled against her lips. And that's what drew them together that night and sealed their fate for the rest of their lives- the feeling that you didn't deserve to be loved. They parted and looked at each other with the understanding that they would try their hardest to make the other feel loved. And for that one moment, Chibs hated himself for wanting her to love him, even though he knew she deserved better.
As crazy as it sounded, it made perfect sense. They had already been doing that with others. The many people they picked up on their lonely nights out, but at least this time their efforts were concentrated towards a kindred spirit. Chibs smiled softly and stared up at the sky, the bright stars lighting his face. "Every man deserves to be loved. You seem like a kind soul. So you've stumbled a few times? So have I." He turned back towards her, and couldn't help but laugh as he pictured all the horrible things he had done over the years.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a joint, lighting it and taking a pull. "I can pray as much as I want to, but it won't erase all the sins. I volunteered myself to this lifestyle because I believe in it, but it doesn't make it right. Trust me, I'm going to burn in hell," he responded. They passed the joint back and forth as he shared his life story with her, including his failed marriage. The loss that came with it and how he had to flee to the United States to escape it all.
He sighed, feeling like he had a 200-pound weight on his shoulder. Erin rubbed his shoulder gently, truly understanding what it meant to be alone. "Remember back at the bar, when you promised to take care of me? Did you really mean that?" She whispered, her voice sounding like a scared child. Chibs raised an eyebrow, looking over at her, and nodded slowly.
Erin hung her head, feeling ashamed for herself. He nodded slowly, wrapping an arm around her. "I'm so dead inside that when I burn in hell, I probably won't feel it. I enjoy it, playing with their emotions. Picking up those men at the bars and making them think I like them. Makes me feel like I finally have some power. I can look at them like he looked at me all those years," she muttered, closing her eyes slowly. Chibs held her tight, drawing in her scent. "We all deserve forgiveness, love."
"So that includes you," she said, opening her eyes and staring at him. She unwrapped herself from him and stood up, looking down at him. Erin took a pull from the joint and exhaled slowly, coughing lightly. "You tried at least to save that kid. You tried to make it work with your wife. You never gave up before- so why now? Because you hit a rough patch and landed in the bottom of a bottle?"
Chibs shook his head and stood up also. "Oh, come on! You're here to give me a pep talk, are ya?" He said, laughing, almost stumbling over drunk. "You're life is in shambles, lady, and you want to fix mines?" Erin stared at him, feeling her blood begin to boil. She was confused as to how things had taken a turn for the worse between them, but she wasn't about to let him talk to her like that. "Oh, fuck off! You're here to let out the ugly! Remember- you begged me to help you get your head out of your ass!" She yelled.
Erin shoved him, causing him to fall over. As he fell, he grabbed onto her arm, dragging her down with him. "What the hell!" She exclaimed, falling on top of him. She shoved him away, trying to climb off of him. "Why are you so difficult?" He asked, grabbing her shoulders and pulling her closer to him. Chibs grabbed her chin and drew her mouth to his, kissing her roughly. Within seconds, her fight was gone, and she had melted on top of him.
Erin breathed heavily, as he rolled them over and slipped between her legs, pinning her arms down. He kissed her hard and fast, his beard rubbing against her face, scratching her roughly. She moaned loudly, as he bit her bottom lip hard enough to draw blood. Erin tried to crawl away from him, but he dragged her back, nuzzling her neck. "Where you going, love?" He whispered, losing a hand up her shirt. She whimpered, as he caressed her and realized she was way out of her league. "I already asked you once before, what about me makes you think anything about me is love?" She managed to get out.
Chibs pulled away from her, stopping his exploration of her body. "Fine, you don't want to be loved?" He asked, standing up and re-arranging his clothes. He struggled to catch his breath and his composure, as he stared down at her lying there on the soft ground. As he watched her, his outlook on her softened. She was just as lost as he was. You're just a child, love- he wanted to say, but instead he held a hand out to her.
He helped her stand up and brushed a leaf out of her hair. "Come on," he said, "let's get back to town." As Erin stood up, she stared up at him, under hooded eyes. She felt rejected, as Chibs re-arranged himself in his pants and began to trek back to his bike. She drew in a deep breath and realized she had made a mistake. As much as she missed the fight, she realized she would miss him more if he left.
She followed quietly behind him, lugging her backpack behind her. He held a helmet out for her, and she snatched it out of his hand, climbing on behind him. Chibs smirked, turning on the bike and guiding them back into town. Moments later, they pulled up to the motel, a seedy hole in the wall establishment that looked the other way when it was convenient.
Erin stumbled off his bike and took off his helmet, shoving it his way. "It was fun," she shouted over her shoulder with a scowl on her face, as she stomped to the office. She got her usual room, in the quiet corner of the motel. It would allow her to sleep off her current state, so she could drive home in a semi-sober manner. "Have a good one," she said to the motel manager, as she exited the office.
As she exited the office, head lost in her bag as she searched for her cigarettes, she found Chibs still in the parking lot of the motel. He was leaning against his bike, a cigarette dangling from his lips. He smirked and held it out to her. "You didn't give me a chance to say good night, love," he said.
She couldn't help but smile, realizing that this man wouldn't be easy to get rid of. She walked over to him, taking the cigarette from his fingers. She took a long pull from it and exhaled slowly, smirking at him. Erin dangled a key in front of him and nodded towards the building behind them. "How about you come tuck me in?" She asked, flicking the cigarette into the parking lot.
Chibs nodded and followed her towards her room, closing the door shut behind them. As soon as they were inside, he picked her up, slamming her against the wall. They stared into each other's eyes, both breathing heavy. "How do you want to be tucked in?" He asked, taking her book bag from her hand and dropping it on the floor. As he asked her, Erin reached over and unbuttoned his leather vest, pulling it off.
She smirked, dropping it onto the floor next to her bag, the room beginning to spin as all the liquor she had ingested began to hit her hard. Erin's tongue felt heavy in her mouth, and all she could do was nod. Chibs placed his hands on the back of her head and guided her to him, placing his mouth on hers. Her hands found their home on his chest, as she inhaled his soft scent of cigarettes and car grease.
He swiftly picked her up and braced them against the wall, her legs wrapping themselves, almost instinctively, around his waist, as they made out gently. Erin began to pull his shirt off, wanting to feel his bare skin. He moaned, as she dragged her nails across his neck, and bit down gently on her lips. Chibs pulled away from her, breathing heavily, and pulled down on the straps of her tank top.
She got the hint, and pulled off her shirt all together, facing him in just her bra. He kissed her all over her chest gently, loving her warm skin against his. Chibs pulled away from the wall and walked them over to the bed, dropping her lightly on to the bed. He took a step back and looked at her in the dimly lit room, amazed. "You're beautiful, you know that right?" He asked, glancing down at her half dressed body.
Erin blushed, sitting up on the bed. She shrugged and motioned to herself. "I could be better, if I didn't drink and smoke so much," she said, standing up. She reached down and unlaced her boots, kicking them off into a corner. He did the same, removing his pants and placing them on the battered table. Erin laughed, stepping towards him and pinching his side. "Hmm... someone has some serious love handles," she joked, stepping close to him.
He chuckled, poking her in the side, placing a hand on her waist. Erin glanced at him from head to toe, at that moment feeling so at home. The big bad biker, standing there only in boxer briefs and socks. She couldn't help but smile from ear to ear. He reached over and unbuttoned her jeans, sliding them down her hips. "Tell me more about my love handles," he said, as he undressed her slowly, studying every inch of her.
She stood in front of him, clad in only a black thong and bra. She slapped his hands away, and climbed onto the bed. "They look good on you. You're fit, for a man your age," she said, turning around, hooking a finger on his waistband. She dragged him onto the bed slowly, her mouth finding his. He moaned, as her hand slid into his underwear and began to touch him gently, massaging him until he became erect.
He grabbed her hand hard and squeezed it, forcing her to let go of him. Chibs pulled her away from him and grabbed on to the clasp of her bra, opening it and pulling her bra off. He grabbed her breasts and squeezed them gently, placing soft kisses on her neck. Erin felt the room spin as Chibs touched her, feeling like her body was on fire.
She threw her arms around his back and leaned back, and his mouth found her nipples. He sucked gently, biting every so often, as she scratched his back and moaned. Erin felt wetness between her legs as Chibs slid one hand into her underwear and kept the other on her chest. Her legs began to shake moments later when she felt her climax approaching.
"Stop!" She exclaimed, pushing him off. Chibs groaned, but pulled off of her, a shit-eating grin on his face. "What happened, love? Not ready yet?" He asked. Erin stared at him, infuriated by the smile on his face. She instinctively reached out and slapped him, the sharp sound echoing off the motel walls. Chibs closed his eyes and balled his hand into a fist. He would never hit a girl, but this caught him off guard. He turned his face away from her and drew in a deep breath. "What the fuck is your damage?" Chibs roared.
When he turned back towards her, he found her standing by the window, staring down at the parking lot. Erin turned to him, tears streaming down her face. "You smile and joke, but you don't know what that moment just meant to me," she whispered, her voice shaking. He looked at her, confused and shocked. Chibs climbed down off the bed and walked over to her, placing a hand on her arm. She brushed it off and ignored him.
He grabbed her chin, forcing her to look at him. "Please explain what just happened to me," he said. She shook her head, drawing in a deep breath. Chibs continued to stare at her, until she couldn't avoid his eyes any more. She turned towards the bed and pointed at it longingly. "That was the closest I have ever come to ever letting myself feel in a very long time. To actually enjoying myself..." She whispered.
He watched as she struggled to articulate what she was feeling. She glanced between the bed and him, her face a dark mask. "It's not easy, trusting someone long enough to let them in like that. Long enough to...reaching that point," she point. "Ahh..." he said, nodding, somewhat understanding her. Chibs glanced back to her, grabbing her hands with his.
He stared into her eyes and drew in a deep breath. "I am many things, love. A bastard one them, but above all- I'm a lover. Let me show you that it's okay to feel loved by another person," he whispered. She shook her head, nervous about the entire idea. He had already come close to it once. "You said come morning, if we realized that this was a bad idea, we would walk away and never look back," she said.
Chibs nodded and smiled over to her, sure that this evening was not a mistake. "Promise. I also said, I would take care of you, and I meant it," he said, stepping closer to her. He brushed her hair off of her shoulder and placed a kiss on it. She shivered at the touch of his cool lips on her warm skin and felt like melting right then and there. "Come on, sweetheart," he said, grabbing her hand and walking her over to the bed.
He pulled back the sheets and let her climb in, while he turned off the lights and pulled open the curtains, the bright moonlight flooding the room. Chibs slid in next to her and found her stone still. He chuckled, turning to her and smiled. "Oh, now you're shy?" He asked. Erin glanced at him, before reaching over to the nightstand and grabbing the bottle of whiskey. She took a few long pulls and grimaced. "I'm getting there," she said, handing him the bottle. She reached down and pulled off her underwear, throwing them across the room.
Erin straddled him, a small smile on her face. She watched as Chibs lit a cigarette and took a drag, staring up at her. Leaning down to kiss him, she began to grind against him, moaning into his mouth. He took a sip from the bottle before placing it back on the nightstand, and grabbing onto her hip. "Stop teasing," he complained, placing his cigarette on the ashtray, and flipping them over.
She squealed, finding Chibs pinning her down. She wrapped her legs around him and found him pressing himself against her opening. "Who is teasing now?" She moaned, trying to get her wrists out of his grasps. Chibs leaned down and captured her mouth with his, kissing her roughly. She gave up trying to escape, and felt him enter her slowly. As he did, he released her wrists, allowing her to wrap her arms around his neck and meet his every thrust.
Chibs pulled away from her mouth, leaning back to watch her. She tightened the grip of her legs on his waist, as his hands found their home on her hips, guiding them together. As they met each other's thrusts, they quickened with intensity, Erin moaning loudly. Chibs grunted, as he watched her breasts bounce with every thrust. He gripped onto her hips hard as he felt his climax coming, and began to pump faster.
Tears escaped Erin's eyes as she began to climax, her body feeling like it was about to explode into a million pieces, as she screamed out. She opened her eyes and found Chibs smiling down at her, his face sweaty, his hair stuck to his forehead. He reached over and pushed it away, before leaning down and placing a kiss on her forehead. Erin couldn't help but smirk as he rolled off of her and plopped down on the bed next to her, his chest covered in sweat.
They spent the next hour chain smoking, drinking, and mindlessly talking about random topics that made them laugh. And until the sun came up, Chibs kept showing Erin it was okay to feel loved by another person. When they finally fell asleep, the sun had been up for a few hours and Erin could barely keep her eyes open. She fell asleep in mid-sentence, leaving Chibs staring down at her. He settled in next to her, and moments later feel asleep too, where vivid dreams began to take over.
It started out just like a normal day at Teller- Morrow, except the kid was there. But how? He was dead! The guys were working on the cars and the kids were playing. Mayans attack. RUN! Chibs threw his tools on the ground and ran to the playground, and found the boy dying again. It was like that afternoon all over again. Chibs? He turned around and found Erin standing there. You can save him. Just try harder. She walked over to the boy and picked him in her arms, handing him to Chibs. Yeah, just try harder. Jax appeared behind Erin, a gun in hand and shot her in the stomach. Chibs screamed as Erin dropped to her knees. Jax laughed and walked away, leaving Chibs with the dead boy and a dying Erin.
Chibs sat up in bed, gasping for air. He glanced at the sleeping woman in the bed and sighed. The sun was high in the sky and he had no idea where the hell he was. He slipped out of the bed quietly and got dressed fast, hoping to slip away without waking the girl up. When he finally got outside of the motel room, he realized how messed up he was. His head was hurting and his stomach was doing somersaults, as the sun was blaring down on him.
Chibs shook his head slowly and climbed onto his bike, something in the pit of his stomach telling him not to go. He felt his phone vibrate loudly in his pocket and he grabbed it. It was a text message from Jax that required his immediate attention. As he turned on his bike, he glanced over to the motel room longingly, a million questions in his head.
"Another time."
