Yes, Cas has learnt to drive sometime during the time before this chapter. Don't know exactly when it happened, but he needed it, so…
Warning? Drug use. Get used to it.
She looks small and scared when he first sees her, and he assesses her age to around 18, definitely not older. Cas is the one who gets to driver her back to the camp, while the others clean up and loot the place, and despite not really caring, he tries to talk to her, since he's heard that talking helps. Or at least distracts.
"So, uh, what's your name?" he asks. She keeps looking out the window.
"Emma. You?" She looks at him briefly.
"Cas." She nods, turning her gaze back to the window. "So, uh…" She looks at him, her eyes hard.
"Look. I don't wanna talk about me. Not right now, okay?" Cas nods, fully understanding her. She looks at him more carefully. "Why are you so sad?" He startles.
"I – uh – I –" He doesn't know what to say, chest constricting as he thinks of Kelly. She looks slightly apologetic.
"Sorry. You don't have to tell. I mean… sorry." Cas blinks to get rid of the tears welling up.
"Her name was Kelly. She died a few weeks ago."
"I'm sorry."
The rest of the ride they spend in silence, and Cas only briefly points out what's what in the camp before he hands her over to Chuck so she can get a place to sleep. He doesn't count on seeing her more that day.
But later that night, someone knocks on his door, someone who doesn't knock like Dean at all. Cas contemplates just ignoring it, because he's sober and miserable and doesn't feel like seeing anybody. But since it isn't Dean, it might be important somehow, even though he gives a bitter snort of laughter at that thought.
When he opens, Emma's standing outside, hands in her pocket, looking a bit unsure.
"Um…" For some reason, he moves aside, letting her in. She looks around. "They all look the same, don't they?" Cas nods. "Uh, um… earlier, you looked like you could use something that made you feel good. You look worse now." Cas just looks at her, confused. "And, uh, I can use some too, and –" She fumbles in her pocket for a moment, then withdraws her hand holding something white and narrow. It looks like a cigarette, but not quite. He tilts his head a bit. "It's good stuff, really good. I promise you'll feel better after some."
"Alright." Cas realizes he doesn't care about exactly what it is, if it really does make him feel better. Emma nods, taking out a lighter as well. She lights the no-quite-cigarette and takes a puff, holding in the smoke for a while before breathing out.
"Ever smoked one of these before?" Cas shakes his head. "Ok, when you breath it in, you need to keep it in for a while, ok? If you breathe out right away, nothing will happen. Look." She takes another puff, handing it over to Cas, who tries to follow her example, but starts coughing after only a second or two on the first try.
He still gets high though, and when it happens, when it kicks in… it's amazing.
They lie on his bed together, squeezed tightly together on the narrow surface, and just giggle. Cas doesn't know how to describe it, but Emma just places a finger on his lips.
"You don't have to, I know." And he feels that she does, she really does. There's no need to for explanations. He looks at her, playing with her chocolate coloured hair, feeling how soft it is.
"You have more of this?" She breaks down into a new giggling fit, but nods. He kisses her, because it feels right. Everything feels right, and she is small and dark where Kelly was blond and curvy, but it doesn't matter right now, because it doesn't hurt so much, and he knows Emma can make it feel even better…
He loses himself in her, in the drug, in a short time when it doesn't hurt so bad.
Well, well. Here we go… please leave a review!
