Thanks for all the reviews! I really really really love them!
Thanks again to Gia for helping me out so much with the chapter!
The content in this chapter is a little bit more explicit than other chapters...just a warning.
Lucas sat in the library, scanning as many websites as he could to know more about the disease, anorexia nervosa. They all were basically saying the same thing, a distorted body image with a need for control.
He was still mad at Brooke for what had happened when he had first entered the library, but the more research he did, the more he realized he had no right to be mad at her. Her body had reacted without her permission to food that it was not used to.
"What ya doin'?" Peyton plopped next to him, causing him to jump. He quickly closed the websites he was looking at, afraid she would ask questions if she saw them.
"Oh, uh, nothing." Lucas shook his head. "What's up?"
The two still weren't on stable ground, but they pretended to be.
"Well, my dad is coming home tonight and I was thinking about cooking a dinner and having my two favorite guys there, what do you think?" She questioned with a hopeful look in her eyes. "You know, it's not too often that I cook, so you probably shouldn't pass up this offer." She gave him a smirk.
"Oh, uh, yeah, wait, you know what? I promised my mom I would have dinner with her tonight. You know how she's been with the whole pregnancy thing." He rolled his eyes, trying to make it more convincing. "Otherwise, I would."
"Oh, that's fine." Peyton tried to cover up the disappointment in her voice. "What about tomorrow night?"
"Maybe." He shrugged. "It's just that with my mom being pregnant and stuff I really want to be around to help her out. It's getting really close to her due date and everything is getting so much harder for her."
"Right, yeah, that's understandable." Peyton fought the tears that were threatening to fall. "Well, I have to get back to class, I'm only on a bathroom break." She held up her pass.
Peyton leaned into kiss him, to which Lucas responded by awkwardly turning his head and forcing her lips to collide with his cheek. She pulled back with a hurt look on her face, and then jetted from the library.
Lucas didn't notice the hurt expression Peyton had been wearing when she left. All he could think about was helping Brooke, and what she needed. So, as soon as she was out of sight, he once again started his search for more information about the disease.
Lucas was intently staring at the screen when he over heard someone saying Brooke's name. His ears immediately perked up and he searched the room for the culprit. It was Chase sitting at a table a few rows down from his. He was talking to a guy and a girl, rather loudly for a library.
"Yeah, I dumped her." He shrugged. "She got mad at me because I wouldn't sleep with her. What kind of a whore does that?"
Lucas' temper flared. It took all of his self control not to get out of his chair and punch the boy talking badly about Brooke.
"Besides, she was still in love with Lucas."
His temper calmed when he heard this. This was a revelation to him. Sure, they had been messing around behind people's backs, but he didn't think she still had feelings for him. She had dumped him and never looked back, until the cheating.
"And, she's really not my type. She was too big for me. I like small girls, she had too many curves."
This time Lucas couldn't control his actions. Before he could stop himself, he was at Chase's table, lifting him out of his chair by the collar on his shirt. Chase struggled to free himself from his grasp, but Lucas was too strong and mad to let go.
"If I EVER hear you say Brooke Davis is too big again, I will personally make sure those will be the last words you ever speak." He spat into his face. Chase stared up at him in horror. Lucas brought his hand up, causing Chase to flinch. He made a fist and was ready to punch him when he decided it wasn't worth it. He threw him back down in the chair, grabbed his stuff, and left the library.
The last thing Brooke needed was someone telling her she was big. She already had enough problems to deal with on her own, without anyone else confirming it. He made a silent promise to prove to Brooke she was more beautiful than she could ever imagine, and he had an idea of how he could do just that.
"Hi guys!" Brooke entered Haley and Nathan's apartment in her usual cheerful mood. They both greeted her in return. "Haley, you're looking more beautiful than ever with that basketball tucked under your shirt. Does Nathan know about that yet?"
"Please," Nathan snorted. "I put that basketball under there to keep all the other guys from hitting on her." He joked, kissing Haley on top of her head.
"I wish it was a basketball." Haley grumbled, trying to situate herself so she was more comfortable, which was impossible these days with the human being hanging off the front of her. "Then maybe my back and feet wouldn't hurt, and I would be able to tie my own damn shoes."
Brooke giggled, which earned her a glare from Haley. "Do you want to go shopping, Hales?"
"Yeah, right." She rolled her eyes. "Why? SO I can get more depressed about how fat I've gotten, I don't think so."
"Oh, come on." Brooke begged. "I'll buy you something."
It took a lot of coaxing on Nathan and Brooke's part to get Haley to join her. But, once they were out, it didn't take long for Haley to start enjoying herself. So far, the two hadn't shopped for clothes for themselves, only for the baby boy that was growing inside of her.
"So, you haven't talked to Peyton since she came over?" Haley asked, browsing through baby stuff.
"No, and I don't really care to." Brooke shrugged, holding an outfit up for Haley to look at.
"That's cute." She smiled. "Lucas talked to her about it. He was really mad, too. I guess she's being all insecure about you and thinks Lucas is still hung up on you. So now Lucas isn't sure what he wants to do with her."
"Oh." Was all Brooke could say. The part of her that was mad at Peyton for confessing her feelings towards Lucas was spitefully laughing at Peyton. But, the side of her that still loved Peyton, couldn't help but feel sorry for her and want to reach out to her. And she couldn't help but feel responsible for the demise in their relationship.
"I'm sorry, Brooke, you probably don't care about any of this."
"I don't mind." She shrugged. "Come on, lets go try on some clothes."
"Brooke!" Haley complained while Brooke drug her towards the junior's section.
Brooke promised Haley they would visit the maternity section before leaving, but first there were too many outfits she wanted to try on. The dressing room was full of them. And as she started pull some jeans up, she realized her old size was too big. When she buttoned them, they hung off her waist, leaving enough room to stick her whole arm inside.
She started to congratulate herself on the amount of self-control she had been able to have, but the more she praised herself, the more ashamed she became. Ever since Lucas had come over with the food, and she hadn't been able to keep it down, she knew what she was doing was wrong. She was slowly killing herself, and it had gotten so out of control, she wasn't sure how to stop it.
Karen watched as her son forked food into his mouth. His mind had been every where but at the table with her. She knew when there was something bothering her son, and this was one of those times.
"Lucas, honey, what's the matter?" She asked.
"Oh, nothing, ma." He sighed, ripping himself from his thoughts. "I just got a lot going on with school and stuff." He shrugged.
"Are you sure?" She pressed.
"Hey, do you mind if I be excused? I have to go see Brooke about something?" He set down his napkin.
"Brooke?" She gave him a confused look. "I thought you were with Peyton."
"I am. I just need to talk to her. About school stuff."
"Oh, yeah, sure. I'll clean up."
"Thanks, ma." He kissed her on the cheek.
He walked quickly towards her house. He wanted to get there as soon as he could so he could prove to Brooke she was amazing. It wasn't long before he was tapping on her bedroom door. Her soft voice called out, allowing him to enter.
Lucas just stared at the beautiful Brooke Davis. Her brown eyes that were always full of life seemed dull at the moment, but still just as breathe taking as ever. Gorgeous brunette locks cascaded past her shoulders in soft waves. Her lips were glistening with a pink lip gloss and were in a soft pout. And as she sat on the bed staring up at Lucas, she looked so innocent. She was perfect in his eyes, and he needed to prove that to her.
Slowly, he stepped towards her. He crouched down to her level, rubbing his hands over the jeans that covered her thighs. There were no words to be spoken because everything that could be said was conveyed through the stare they shared.
He brought his hand to her face to caress her cheek. As he did so he pulled his body up and pressed his lips against hers. Both hands went to the back of her head, pulling her in to him. He followed up with a few more soft pecks before pushing her back into a lying position. His hands found the buttons on her blouse and he started to undo them one by one. He carefully removed every piece of clothing she was wearing.
Brooke lay before him, nothing to hide her body. She initially felt vulnerable and exposed but the way Lucas was staring at her made her feel comfortable. His baby blue's penetrated her body and stared directly into her soul. Warmth spread from her heart throughout her whole body. Only he could make her feel this comfortable in her own skin, yet completely vulnerable at the same time.
Lucas scanned over Brooke's body. What was once voluptuous was now rigid. Cheek bones jutted from her face, leaving soft sunken holes below them. Her collar bone protruded from her paper thin skin. Two ribs were clearly defined, and the third was making its way there. Her two hip bones looked like mountains while the skin in between looked like the valley. But, Lucas didn't care though. He loved her body and would love it no matter what.
"Brooke, you're beautiful." He breathed out, his words barely audible. His breath tickled Brooke's ear, giving her goose bumps all over her body. "From the inside out, you're beautiful."
He began kissing her lips, then trailing to her ear. He suckled her earlobe before kissing his way down to her collar bone. His lips roamed her body, taking time to pay attention to every detail. He had a need to make Brooke feel just as perfect as she was, and if it would take all night, that's what he was willing to do.
Waves of euphoria swept Brooke's body every time Lucas' lips caressed her. Moans of pleasure and fulfillment escaped her mouth without her control. She clawed the sheets, arching her back in pleasure. He was sending her over the edge without having to touch the one spot that was begging for attention.
"Lucas, what are you doing to me?" She panted, not wanting him to stop.
"I'm loving you, Brooke." His words fell from his mouth before he could stop them, but Brooke didn't seem to care that he had said it. Instead, she begged for more, causing a satisfied smirk to form on Lucas' lips.
He nibbled on her inner thigh, then slid his tongue towards her center. Brooke grabbed the headboard, anticipating the feeling of Lucas' mouth on her sweet spot. He teased her more with his tongue. She grabbed his head, forcing him in between her thighs, no longer being able to take the yearning for him there.
Lucas laughed a little before starting to lap up her juices. Brooke's hips bucked as she screamed from the pleasure he was giving her. It wasn't long before she once again went over the edge. Slowly, her breathing start to become normal again as Lucas finished her off.
She grabbed him aggressively. She started to remove his clothes with vigor, wanting to feel him inside her. Lucas pulled back, stopping her aggressive actions.
"What?" She questioned. "I want you, now, Lucas."
"Shh." He put his finger to her lips. "It's going to happen, but I want to take my time. I want to make you feel how perfect I think you are."
His words touched her heart, sending warm sensations once again shooting through her body. If she could capture that feeling, she was sure it would be the equivalent to heaven on earth.
He pressed his mouth against hers, taking her bottom lip into his mouth. He released her lip then dragged his tongue along it before slowly sliding it in to explore her tongue. His hand cupped her cheek while his other hand intertwined with hers. He loved the feeling of her petite fingers protected by his masculine ones.
Soon, all of his clothes were discarded on the floor and their bodies were pressed against one another, bare flesh against bare flesh. Lucas' hips were between her thighs as he eagerly awaited penetration of her body. After he did, he didn't move, allowing himself time to feel and remember what it was like to be whole. For him and Brooke Davis to be as one.
He couldn't help but feel that this was the way it was meant to be. His and her body were made to fit together perfectly. Because when he was with her, she completed the other half of him. Peyton never made him feel the way Brooke did just by being in the same room, and he hadn't understood why until it dawned on him that Brooke was his other half, his better half.
As he started to pump his hips, he knew he wouldn't last long. But, he didn't care because he knew Brooke wasn't going to last long either. He continued on slowly, and Brooke pumped her hips, matching his speed and allowing deeper penetration. Both couldn't control the sounds that were rumbling from deep within them. And as Lucas went over the edge, he whispered 'I love you' in her ear, causing Brooke to fall over with him.
He collapsed onto her, nuzzling his nose into her neck. Brooke wrapped her arms around him, pulling him closer, not ever wanting to let go. If Lucas had made her feel that perfect while they were together, she was sure they wouldn't be in the mess they were currently in. It took her breath away to know he felt this way about her.
"I never want to let go, Lucas." Brooke whispered. "That was so incredible."
"Brooke, you deserve this, and so much more." He pulled away from her neck to look into her eyes. "You are the most perfect person that I have ever met."
"I am not perfect." She giggled, kissing the tip of his nose.
"Yes you are."
Brooke averted her eyes from him. It embarrassed her to hear him say things like that.
"Brooke, promise me something." Lucas tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.
"What?"
"Promise me that you'll start eating, because I wouldn't be able to stand it if something happened to you and I wouldn't be able to stare into your beautiful brown eyes." His eyes looked so pleadingly into hers, that it broke her heart. She knew she had to stop what she was doing, and if she couldn't do it for herself, she could at least do it for Lucas.
"Okay, Lucas." She nodded her head. "But, only if you do what you just did for me every night for the rest of our lives."
"Deal." He laughed. "I know everything is kind of messed up right now, but I really want to focus on getting you better. So, that's what I'm going to do. I don't care if everything gets screwed up. "
"Lucas," Brooke sighed. "I really appreciate that, but I don't want to mess up your life. I am going to quit doing this to myself."
"It won't be messing up my life, because my life is much better with you-"
There was a knock on her door, interrupting him, which startled them both. Lucas attempted to jump out of the bed, but the door started to open so he hid himself under her sheets.
"Brooke, I'm so sorry to barge in but I knocked and the front door was open so I-" She stopped mid-sentence. "Oh my God, I am so sorry, Brooke. I didn't know you had someone here. I am such an idiot."
Brooke's heart pounded so hard in her chest she was sure the girl standing in front of her could hear it. "Oh, uh, Peyton, um, no, it's um, it's okay." She stammered. She clenched the sheet against her body and checked to make sure no body parts on Lucas were showing.
"I'm sorry, so sorry." Peyton shook her head, feeling like an idiot. "This is so embarrassing. So, look, I just came to apologize because I was an idiot for thinking I could ask for your advice about Lucas. And, just when I thought I couldn't feel more like an idiot, I do this!" She swung her hand in the direction of the body lying underneath the sheets.
"No, no, it's uh, it's okay, Peyton." Brooke giggled nervously, hoping she would leave soon.
"Wow, Brooke, this is," She looked to the floor, trying to find more words to say. And as she scanned the floor, she noticed a familiar pair of shoes, and then shirt, and then pants. "Um," She looked up, shaking her head, trying to rid the thoughts from her brain. "Um."
"Look, Peyton, it's okay. I'm over it." Brooke shrugged. "I don't care if you come to ask me about Lucas, feel free to anytime." She was now just trying to get her to leave as soon as possible.
"Really, Brooke?" Peyton tried to cover the sarcasm in her voice. She went to the bed and sat down next to Brooke. "I really appreciate that. You know, after everything that I've done to you, it's so amazing you are so forgiving of me."
"Yep, well, that's me." Brooke laughed again, feeling more nervous than ever.
"So, who do you have under the sheets?"
"Oh, uh, no one." She shook her head. "Just, you know, some random hook up. You know me!"
"Right."
Peyton stood up enough to rip back the sheets, and reveal a naked Lucas. Even though she had already known he was there, she still felt completely shocked. Her mouth about fell to the floor and her eyes grew wide.
"Look, Peyton, we can explain." Lucas started.
